I got it! Simple yet arguably the best option: black coffee. You don’t seem to like overcomplicating or overthinking things. You are a very straightforward person who knows exactly what you want and what to get. (You might have your coffee with milk or creamer from time to time—we all like doing it at times for a change.)

Sorry, black coffee, with cream, is not, err, black coffee. I do resent those who suggest that black coffee also has to have no sugar in it - go to Italy ad see how most people drink it there, or for that matter Greek or Turkish coffee, normally even made with sugar in it before serving.