No one is safe from a birthday party failure. You see, with so much pressure building up to be happy and joyful on your big day, it’s normal to have reality destroy the expectations. No wonder so many people feel anxious, sad, disinterested and apathetic when it comes to celebrating and thinking about their birthday. The phenomenon is known as birthday blues and it affects way more people than we’d think.

“For some, it could be tied to previous negative experiences with birthdays. Others may reflect on their lives and may not feel they are where they wanted to be by that specific age,” says Dr. Lira de la Rosa, a licensed clinical psychologist and member of the media advisory group at the Hope for Depression Research Foundation. “For others, birthdays can come during times when they are going through something difficult.”

Moreover, there could be several reasons why a person experiences birthday depression. This may be due to depression, anxiety, fear of getting old, or history of family drama on birthdays during childhood. “All of these and many other reasons can contribute to feeling sad during a birthday,” says Dr. Lira de la Rosa, and adds that these reasons are normal and valid.

Allowing your emotions to arise may be key in combating birthday blues. “We tend to associate birthdays with celebrations and positive experiences, and that may not be the case for everyone. So, if you are not feeling excited or happy during this time, allow yourself permission to sit with the sadness,” says Dr. Lira de la Rosa.

According to Dr. Lira de la Rosa, turning inward to take inventory of your feelings, thoughts is a great idea. It may help you to hold tension in your body to better understand what you may be going through. She argues that “If we increase our awareness about our feelings, we can approach these feelings with compassion.” It’s a great idea to try and self-soothe and comfort ourselves by reminding that we are human beings when we feel a range of emotions. Which is totally normal.

Previously, we spoke with Lynn How, the author of “Positive Young Mind'' and life coach who specializes in supporting educators, parents, and children with improving and prevention of mental health issues. How said that something thoughtful is always the best way to go when picking a present for a person.

But “if you don't know the person, perhaps see if you can glean some information from a mutual friend if possible or see if their social media profiles give anything away,” she said and added to “not forget to check for allergies before buying food!”

How reminds us that when it comes to expensive gifts, love can't be bought and although the odd grand gesture is lovely, “I'd much rather receive a thoughtful smaller gift or experience such as being taken on a surprise picnic with some lovely food!”

“Gifts become materialistic if they become expected and regular but it depends on what your ideals are for your individual relationship as well as how long you have been together.” How concluded that “Someone who showered me with expensive gifts after only a few dates might be coming on a bit too strong for my liking!”