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35 Women Share What’s The Most Insulting Thing They’ve Heard From Their Employers
Interview With Author
There’s no such thing as the ‘perfect’ workplace, but that’s no reason not to try and make it one. No matter how you swing things, the bosses and managers are at the core of each and every organization. And every little thing that they do affects everyone else, like ripples in a corporate pond.
So when your boss is an energetic, supportive, empowering leader, everything will go swimmingly. However, far from everyone is lucky to have one of these, as some women have been sharing on Reddit.
Prompted by user BayAreaDreamer on the r/AskWomen subreddit, they have been opening up about the most insulting things their bosses have said to them and… it’s horrible. There’s no other way to put it—there’s no place for such language and such views in modern society. Have a read for yourselves, dear Pandas.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
I’m a firefighter. I’m also a woman. A few years ago I had one of my officers tell me “you should really consider a different career... women’s bodies are just not designed to withstand this job.”
He ended up having to retire early last year due to a shoulder injury.
RELATED:
#2
My old boss told me multiple times that I'm lucky he's married, because he wouldn't be able to control himself if he wasn't.
He would also tell me that I would make an amazing personal assistant/Secretary (I'm a systems analyst) for my looks alone. When I told him this was innapropriate he'd ask why I'm being hormonal.
I was on the verge of filing a sexual harassment complaint when he quit.
#3
My girlfriend had a miscarriage last year at 6 months, she stayed at home after that for two weeks because she wasn't feeling good. When she came back her boss told her to man up a little, that it isn't a reason to stay at home...
The author of the thread, redditor BayAreaDreamer, told Bored Panda that the #MeToo movement did "a good job of bringing to light the various experiences women have far too often with sexual harassment and sexual violence."
"The sexism that's alive in workplaces and which the redditor has experienced is what drove them to ask other women to share their own stories. "I think this issue is a crosscutting one with issues of sexual violence also, since economic success and independence (or lack thereof) plays a big role in whether women are able to win respect publicly or leave domestic abusers privately," the redditor said.
#4
“You need to stop referring to your wife. It’s making people uncomfortable.” This was in response to after asking how my weekend was and I said “my wife and I went to visit family in Minnesota.”
#5
I was sitting at a table in the dining area and all but one person at that table were women. It's the first time I'd ever had the opportunity to sit at a table full of women and I was very excited to not be a token for once.
Boss walked by, shaking his head, "bunch of clucking hens"
Every single day for years I'd said nothing about being the only woman or being in a very small minority. Eating all my meals every day with all men, the lounge was full of men, everywhere you went it was groups of men.
Then women had the audacity to sit in close proximity and without even knowing what we were discussing, we were immediately written off?
Screw that guy.
#6
I used to work as a barista and my boss literally said to me, "no wonder you get more tips, you've got the body for it" and then looked at my boobs. I felt really gross the rest of the day. It made me super self-conscious about the t-shirts I wear.
BayAreaDreamer said that speaking to HR is an option, however, this requires that there's actually a clear case of illegal behavior taking place. "[This] isn't always the case when it comes to subtler versions of sexism. Additionally, I have worked at organizations that don't have HR, and where I had an Executive Director basically accuse me of lying when I told him that a Senior employee was not only yelling at female employees and behaving in a generally aggressive and hostile manner but also had said that he came into the organization with the goal to take over from that same Executive Director (it was not a lie)."
They added: "In general, I think creating workplaces that are more welcoming of gender diversity is going to require creating organizations where there is close to gender parity in hiring at every level (not just lower-level staff, which is what often happens)."
#7
I had dental work done when I was pregnant. I came to work with a numb and drooling mouth. My boss pulled me aside and whispered to me "isn't a shame how semen rots your teeth?" I was a 29/f at the time, he was a male in his 60s. So glad to no longer be working for this idiot.
Chris Challis 3 years ago
no doubt he was head honcho. Fat and old and a long time since his semen was anywhere but down the shower plug lol~
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Peter Ian Staker 3 years ago
WTF? I'm the master of inappropriate workplace banter but that's just.....
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
Woah wtf! What the fûck is wrong with people. Of course semen doesn’t rot your teeth!
Casey McAlister 3 years ago
Was that supposed to be a disgusting joke? Or he actually thought that semen rots people's teeth? Most importantly, was he reported?
Lorrie Rothstein 3 years ago
That has to be the most disgusting thing I ever heard. What a pervert and a jerk
The End Is Nyreezy 3 years ago
That's unfortunate. He must have been speaking from experience.
Eemeli Saarelainen (Molter) 3 years ago
A gentle kick in the groin area would be better. Mostly harmless but certainly unforgettable. I don't condone violence but I certainly would understand violent behavior in this case.
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Dean Garner 3 years ago
Time to totally & literally call him out. 'Sorry, not sure what you mean. Can you explain exactly what you mean by that...? Cue embarrassed stuttering or shame filled silence... if he was human.
KombatBunni 3 years ago
Would have asked how he knew, or said well spit next time, don’t swallow!
deanna woods 3 years ago
Do these people not think before they start saying this inappropriate garbage?
M Kate McCulloch 3 years ago
Oh not (HAHA) It's not that! It's the constantly grinding my teeth because I have to deal with sexist comments like the one YOU just made. BTW, you have some experience with semen rotting your teeth, do ya?
Eva Atkisson 3 years ago
i would have said it will never be yours and as u can see i dont swallow
Bettie-Jean Neal 3 years ago
Woah. My eyes almost popped out of my head. I can't believe what I just read. So wrong and on so many levels! eww. Eww. EWW!
Mark Kelly 3 years ago
Wait, you want to work? Here in Canada all pregnant woman get paid time off.
Brett Layton 3 years ago
whoa the F? may be a winner for most disgusting comment in this thread.
Thenatural 3 years ago
She should've said 'only if you gargle it!' And given him a heart attack...
M O'Connell 3 years ago
It sounds like a comeback, but it would only affirm his perception that the comment was appropriate and ultimately make things worse.
Load More Replies... #8
When he was letting people go home early, my boss comes up to me and said “You’ve been a good girl. You can go.”
I was a grown ass woman in my thirties.
#9
I once had the boss of my boss tell me, in front of most of my colleagues, to bring a cup of water to the partners into his office, because "the hottest woman of the office is out, and you're second on that list".
The water fountain was literally on his way from his office to my desk. Also, I am an IT specialist, and the entire firm was reliant on the job I (and the few other IT consultants of the firm) was doing. "Hottest woman" was the secretary, who was sleeping with a higher up, barely worked an hour or two a day, and made more than I did.
Bored Panda also wanted to get the redditor's opinion about what makes for a good boss or manager. In their opinion, accountability is a vital part of this. "In general, I think there is a tendency for many people (men and even sometimes women) to point at a man in a position of relative power who has behaved badly and say, 'We shouldn't punish him because that would risk destroying his career, and he adds value to the organization (or movement, in case of politicians).' However, I don't think enough people ask, 'What of value could these women have contributed if they weren't pushed out by hostile/inappropriate men? How can we justify the tremendous potential value that is being lost there?'
#10
My boss at the comic book store knew I was anorexic and in recovery, which is why I ate little snacks constantly. He told me there was an alternate universe version of me who never ate but was enormously fat because of all my snacking and she didn't know why she kept getting bigger, that by eating I was torturing her.
Probably that
#11
I asked for a raise, and my boss told me I didn't need one because my boyfriend made enough for the two of us.
Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago (edited)
And he knows your boyfriend's earnings how? Not that it matters though coz it is still not a good enough reason.
#12
Job 1: After asking for help for 3 months, working 60-80 hour weeks. “I don’t care if you have to stay up all night to do your job. Get it done”
Job 2: women aren’t allowed on the company trip because there’s alcohol involved and we want to keep them safe.
Also Job 2: A manager comes to my office yelling at me cause I looked at him wrong and questioned his response to something. I’m not letting someone talk to me that way, he wouldn’t leave when asked, so I raised my voice and responded to his comments. I’m the one who got in trouble for yelling at a man. They also made him my manager after that.
I wasn’t there very long after these incidents.
They continued: "I'd like to see more people focusing on that latter set of questions, and striving to design workplaces where everyone can realize their full potential. Also, I learned about a cool technology tool some workplaces were experimenting with where people could report workplace sexual harassers anonymously online, and if two or more people both experienced issues with the same person, they'd automatically be notified and given the other's contact info so they could decide what steps to take next."
A system like that could have the power to change things for the better in the fight against workplace discrimination. "Often people in power who abuse their power deliberately do it in a way such that the person being targeted feels isolated and isn't sure if they're somehow responsible or not—so technology that can help employees identify patterns of problematic behavior makes sense to me."
#14
"If I'd known you had tattoos, I probably wouldn't have hired you"
#15
Had a female supervisor tell me that dressing slutty was distracting to my coworkers and I needed to cover up. I was wearing a plain womens v-neck tshirt, and khaki pants. I also only had one Male coworker, who worked on the opposite side of the building. She was just a salty old bi**h. I reported her for harrassment, she was transferred to another store, and then fired shortly after for the same behavior.
it's Wednesday my dudes. 3 years ago
women support women. if she is comfortable enough with her body to wear that then congratulations to her!
Generally, if your boss or manager is harassing you, the first thing you should do is politely but firmly tell them that they’re being rude or that you feel uncomfortable. However, if you’re scared for your job, you should instead talk to your Human Resources department.
Unfortunately, while some HR departments are a true godsend, others are merely an extension of the boss’ influence. Naturally, some employees find that their complaints about legitimate issues fall on deaf ears or that they’re even reprimanded for raising the topic at all. If the insults, harassment, and bullying all persist, it’s time to think about litigation. It’s a last resort, but it shouldn’t be discounted if nothing else works and your life suffers.
At the end of the day, each and every one of us sets our own boundaries for what we’re willing to live with at work. If your bosses are being unresponsive, if the HR is unhelpful, and you find the quality of your work dropping because of the toxic atmosphere, it’s time to consider other options. You’re there to work, not be someone’s verbal and emotional punching bag.
#16
My female coworker and I were prepping before the lunch shift at a restaurant. Male GM walks over and says, "You know, I had a dream about you two last night," pauses, reconsidering something, "No, I probably shouldn't tell you about it," smiles to himself, and walks away. We were so appalled and disgusted we just stood there, too stunned to say anything.
#17
That a project I was managing was being moved to a Male colleague because it was more of a "mans project".
Ericka Hokkanen 3 years ago
Remind them that if it takes a d**k to do a job you can go buy one MUCH BIGGER than the ones in the office so you have that all covered should the need arise.
#18
When I was 16 I worked at a fast food place on weekends. One day I was opening up the place and preparing food etc. and my manager (easily late 40s/late 50s) walked in with new staff and was giving them a tour.
As he walked in, I was on my knees trying to fix something and he introduced me as “a typical woman always on her knees”. At the time I was still practically a shy kid and was in complete and utter shock and never said anything to anybody because I didn’t want to cause any trouble or create problems for myself. But after I quit the job I heard that he actually got suspended a couple of times for inappropriate comments to other women. I wish so much that I had the confidence back then to report him!
Here at Bored Panda, we’ve covered workplace topics in great depth: from issues with poor management and (un)helpful HR departments to the gender pay gap, sexism, and how the pandemic has affected women in the workforce.
Australian heart and lung surgeon Dr. Nikki Stamp told Bored Panda in an earlier interview that it’s mostly men who don’t believe in the existence of the gender pay gap. Some of them attribute the difference in wages not to sexism but to women deciding to have children.
“The reason that this is problematic is that it isn’t economic or legal actions that will resolve the gender pay gap but cultural changes. If people don’t even believe something exists, how can we change it?” Dr. Stamp said.
#19
"We're excited to have you here. And not just because you're a beautiful woman." This happened last year. VP of my department. I've since left the company.
#21
My boss accused me of having an affair with another married coworker, then said, 'Or if you haven't yet, you will.'
Reducing the gender pay gap increases women’s workforce participation and reduces the amount of housework they do while their spouses end up doing more chores than they do currently.
“But of course, women have also been shown to do more chores at home than their husbands even when they earn more money. However, these are big cultural changes requiring us to upend long-standing social structures. Recognizing that we experience the world differently depending on our gender would be a good start,” Dr. Stamp said.
#22
'You are great at your job, but you are not pretty enough to think that should get you anywhere.'
#23
In 2004 or 5 a boss asked me if my partner and I had had sex the night before and what were are most frequently chosen sex positions. It was out of nowhere and in front of three other employees.
Other women had problems with him and complained about him to each other. I decided to talk to my line manager about this and all the other female employees denied he had ever said anything that made them uncomfortable or that they disliked it.
I was more disappointed in my coworkers letting me take the fall in truth. Though I understand their need to keep their jobs and not rock the boat.
troufaki13 3 years ago
Speak up! It's the silence that allows them to keep this behavior! I know it's not easy and sometimes it comes with great cost, but something needs to be done.
#24
I had a female manager at a clothing store look at me at 19 and tell me that I was too smart for any boy to actually like me. I needed to dumb myself down or I would be alone forever.
Joke is on her because at 35 she is an ‘aspiring’ Instagram model with almost no followers and I am with an engineer who loves my quick wit. And thankfully I’m not in retail any more.
According to Eddy Ng, the James and Elizabeth Freeman Professor of Management at Bucknell University in Lewisburg, Pennsylvania, women are underrepresented at senior levels in jobs.
“They don’t fit the prototype of what leaders look like. They often lacked the preparation, not in terms of qualifications, but the socialization necessary to ascend to elite levels. Some of these are political skills, some are sponsorships, and some are social capital acquired at the golf courses and locker rooms, and few women partake in these socialization activities,” Professor Ng told Bored Panda in an earlier interview.
“Women make less than men because they are concentrated in lower-paying professions or lower-paying industries, even for female executives and CEOs. Think CEO for a cosmetics company vs. CEO for a manufacturing company,” he said.
#25
Requested paperwork to file a formal sexual harassment complaint against a coworker. Was asked by the restaurant owner who it was about, and when I told him he laughed and waved me off because this other person "was harmless"... Nevermind that he'd started following me to the restroom, out to my car...
Luckily he never actually got his hands on me. I quit. No money is worth my safety. And this creeper was apparently deported lol vindication! I'm sure the boss man is still there though.
#26
When I was working as a bakery manager for a gas station, my shift started at 4:30, so I had time to get breakfast ready. No one else was waiting for me to get there. I clocked in one morning at 4:35, and my boss said, "You know there are plenty of jobs you can get lying on your back". I ended up clocking out and going home. I filed a complaint against him but was told it was a he said, she said situation and they couldn't do anything about it.
#27
I was pulled in to his office and asked if I was pregnant. I told him, but I had in fact gained a bit of weight. Thanks for noticing, but I'm not pregnant. He then insisted, telling me it would be hard to find a replacement so I should tell him now. It then got out and I had coworkers teasing me about my food baby. That part I could laugh off, but I'm still insulted even I think back to that exchange with my manager.
The professor said that “taste discrimination—paying women less than men for doing the same job” is something else that we have to take into account. “Women rely on other women for sources of (compensation) information and mentorship. This, in turn, has the unintended effect of receiving inaccurate/discounted information from women mentors who are being paid less themselves, and then forming lower expectations.”
Professor Ng continued: “Inaccurate information, lower expectations, and negotiation styles lead women to negotiate lower salaries at the start of their careers, and this gets magnified as women progress through their careers. Career interruptions (to start a family) also exacerbate the pay gap, and men rarely interrupt their careers to start a family.”
While the pandemic has greatly affected women in the workforce, it’s racialized women who have felt the brunt of the disruptions. According to Professor Ng, they are “often employed in low-skill jobs and in industries that are primed to be automated.” He said: “Think meatpacking, grocery shopping, and other service-based jobs. The pandemic accelerated the automation because of health and safety needs. It also temporarily or permanently eliminated many service and hospitality jobs because of lockdowns.”
#28
Not towards me but he fired a coworker for taking "too many days off" to go to her boyfriend's "birthday." In reality her bf had to get a major operation done and it was only 2 days off - which she told him in advance and those 2 days also made up for her overtime hours.
Another time was when he told me he didn't want to hire a candidate (which I and everyone else thought was a great fit) because she might be a "liability." It was because she told us in the interview that she had to leave her previous job because of constant sexual harassment. That really opened my eyes to how gross of a person he is. I left that job shortly after.
#29
Oh boy I've got some good ones.
Most recently, however, was something that happened not to me, but to a co-worker. Her grandmother passed away after a long illness, and she went to the funeral a few days later. She came back to work for the evening shift the same day as the funeral, and the manager told her (in front of several other staff members) - "This is customer service darling. For gods sake, put a smile on, yeah?"
#30
Back when I was interning for a PR company, one of my male supervisors told me to forward some contracts to a magazine we were working with. I did as I was told, only to be yelled at by my boss for doing it. He then calmed himself down and said ''women can't think rationally anyway, I overreacted''. My supervisor pretended like he had nothing to do with it.
Mohsie Supposie 3 years ago
Always ask for such instructions to be sent in writing i.e. e-mail.
According to the Harvard Business Review, the pandemic, lockdowns, and restrictions have reversed much of the progress toward greater gender equality that was made in recent years. The coronavirus pandemic has made women’s jobs 1.8 times more vulnerable than men’s.
“Women make up 39% of global employment but account for 54% of overall job losses as of May 2020,” points out the Harvard Business Review.
#31
During an interview with HR: “What do you intend to do to prove yourself? You know, since you are a woman”
Same guy, when I was planning a presentation and asked him for about 30 minutes of his teams bi-weekly meeting time: “you’re are good as a man, you could do it in 15!”
#32
That my maternity leave was a vacation, and this was a female boss who's had children.
Edgar Rops 3 years ago
"Jerk" is a gender-neutral characteristic. Really sorry for her kids. Hopefully, her husband is a good father, because, clearly, she is a questionable mother.
#33
I can’t decide.. Two days ago my boss told me that he didn’t like my shirt & it made me look pregnant. Yesterday he had a talk with me how I don’t have potential in life due to low motivation.
However, that’s not the only issue, according to Forbes. Women have also been taking on the vast majority of extra chores at home, from taking care of their children to ensuring that their kids’ education doesn’t suffer while distance learning. Now imagine having an unsupportive boss who insults you on top of all of that.
#34
At a medical office where I worked they cut our vacation hours, and then gathered all the lowest-paid employees for a meeting with the owner. He explained how we all had to make sacrifices for the business, for example, his kids see that the neighbors all have pools in their backyards and are like "dad, why don't we have a pool?" and so he understands the sacrifices we're making by having our vacation hours cut (oh, and being asked to take over janitorial duties).
#35
I was 8 months pregnant and I walked into the office and my boss said, “wow! I can’t tell if you’re coming or going.” Meaning I was so round all the way around. I just found it very offensive and insulting.
Another boss screamed at me, “you live in a vacuum!!!!”
What do you think ?
Iapetos 3 years ago
Makes me want to smack all of them. In the face. With something very heavy.
Sasy 3 years ago
I could not read after 20 these are horrible. So horrible they need to be printed out and available in all companies as cards and posters, there needs to also be cards like in sports that if someone is out of line you can just give them a card and they will know. It should also be very clear that anything said in such manner is allowed to be not only reported but publicly displayed and the name of the person clear. This should be a very set in stone terms of employment for any company. Just for one moment imagine what you are saying is being said to your Daughter or Mother, or Son or Father, because Women are guilty of sexist behavior also.
Mimi777 3 years ago
I worked at a small family owned business. I dropped some papers and bent down to pick them up my boss said "damn I love that view" his wife worked there as well and was in the next room. I finally got fed up and quit. It was really good pay but i couldn't deal with his numerous sexual comments he'd randomly make and it kept getting worse and worse.
KombatBunni 3 years ago
I would have said I’ll tell your wife you said that, or asked him if he says that to her. What a pig
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Lea S. 3 years ago (edited)
I had made a mistake, I'd confided in my female boss of a year that I was worried I hadn't got my period. I thought we had a real good relationship, she let me leave to go get a test at the women's clinic. When everything turned out fine she told me 'maybe you'll keep your legs closed now.' Forget that I'd been in a committed relationship with one man for two years.
Rae Reyn 3 years ago
My first "real" job was a grease monkey at an oil change place. There was one other woman there but she was customer service while I spent my shift in the pit. My boss asked me if I could wear make up to be more on (service lady)'s level. No. No I will not be wasting make up to be an oil covered cave troll. Surprisingly, I have had mostly positive experiences being a female automotive tech.
EA 3 years ago (edited)
After wearing a dress with leather panels to work my boss made a joke about how my ‘real self’ was coming out. IT support by day, dominatrix by night. It spread round the office and all the guys teased me about it for months. In another job, the boss said in front of my team, let’s get you a guy, we’ll grab the first guy we see and get you both in a hotel room, cos you need a good shag to loosen up. Also asked me if I was attracted to him would I have sex with him, there and then?
Iapetos 3 years ago
I guess it was their way of begging for a good whipping.
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Ozacoter 3 years ago
I had a lot of bad experiences with bosses, from being asked if I wanted to get pregnant in an interview to my boss of my last internship almost failing me and calling me "inmature and irresponsible" for getting very ill and need to go a few days to the hospital for tests. But the worst was when I did research in Germany. My contract was of part time and I was earning 600 euros a month. They made us work 50-75 hours a week. I needed the money and invested a lot traveling there so quitting wasn't an option. I designed an alternative schedule so we could all work 40h (still like double that what I was getting paid for). My coworkers (the bosses girlfriend and a suckup with no personality) called me "a traitor" for wanting to reduce everybody's hours. My boss told me that "If I worked so little I was of no use for him". I contacted the university to explain them the situation when I quit and they just said that they were sorry that I wasn't happy there.
I want cake 3 years ago (edited)
Labour laws in Europe overall are quite good, but internships fall outside of those laws which is widely abused. I never did an internship and so never got anywhere in my chosen career direction (art/architecture history) because all internships were full time either without pay or for 195-250 euro per month, and I have too much self respect for that. My time is worth more than that and either way, I couldn't afford to do that anyway. I couldn't exactly pay my rent with all that lovely experience they promised.
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Yvette Desmarais 3 years ago
Talk about cringe. Why is it that the only way to change this seems to be for the victim to leave?
Victoria Pitt 3 years ago
It's true. I had a sexist boss for 6 years and every time I went to report him to HR it was turned around on me. "Well, Did you tell him it made you uncomfortable??" Like, it's harassment, he is well aware he's making me uncomfortable, that's why he's doing it. Yea I waited until I found a new job where I negotiated 20k salary increase from that one, then split.
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Random Anon 3 years ago
In my teens, I worked in the mall after school for extra cash. It's common to run into parents of school mates. One particularly affluent mom actually said to her kid, who is the younger brother of a guy in my grade "You need to study hard so you don't become like that". "That" was referring to me, said in their native tongue, which I understood. I have darker skin tone so she assumed I wouldn't understand her. So two decades later, I bumped into the older brother and learnt his lil brother is going back to rehab for alcoholism. Now I'm not wealthy my any stretch but I think I'm doing alright.
somnomania 3 years ago
what i've learned here is that every woman should carry an audio recorder or have ready access to one on her phone, and just activate it as soon as a man seems to be approaching her for any reason
Victoria Pitt 3 years ago (edited)
Wish I had done that at my old job years ago. Oh my gosh. I would be a rich woman, but more importantly, that pig would have gotten what he deserved.
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Johanne Couvrette 3 years ago
Being told , i must be on my period or menopausal , cause i expressed my opinion in a louder voice so i could be heard over the yelling that was going on
Ali Kovach 3 years ago
I was 19 and worked as a groom at a saddlebred stable. My boss the trainer and the other grooms had all gone to a horse show for the week so was just left there alone to care for the remaining horses. The trainers boyfriend probably in his 40s and a veterinarian had come in to check on one of the foals. I was mucking out a stall when he leaned on the door and said he would love to have a sexual encounter with me. I said I don’t think my boyfriend would go for that and neither do I. I quit the next week. I also told the trainer what happened and why I was leaving. She docked my pay for one of the showhorses that was on my string who had chewed on her reins.
Bex Hallihan 3 years ago
I work in an extremely male-dominated industry. I'm the only woman on my depot and I have NEVER had issues like that with anyone at this company. Previous jobs are a different matter however...
Kill-Bunny 3 years ago
After I've got married, I've started developing some health issues and gaining weight because of it. Every time I had a sick leave or did not participate in company activities, I got my belly stared at. I've got straight asked If I was pregnant or trying to get pregnant point black, randomly, instead of "hello" multiple times on and on. I think some people even thought that I was lying about it and decided not to be friends anymore since, well... if you're pregnant, you're going to leave anyway. It lasted 2 years. I got diagnosed with endometriosis, got an operation and after coming back after it, I was ignored for almost 4 months, my boss literally walked by me avoiding eye contact. People were almost not talking to me and later on, bosses decided to move my office to other place, so I had to pack and unpack about 50 square meters office-library full of books and 10 years worth of documents. After abdomen surgery. Alone. My boss (a female) knew about my health issues.
I want cake 3 years ago
So.. You got ostracised and discriminated against for being sick? And they didn't even try to hide it. What a bunch of disgusting scumbuckets.
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McPanda 3 years ago
The amount of these stories that exist make me wonder whether or not there is something that can be done generationally. This is apparently not going to change for people of a certain age group. I don't mean this in an ageist way, but the anecdotal evidence provided here was always an older man, or a man in some power position, talking down to a woman. It does not seem to me that these people are teachable, which seems defeatist. What on Earth could we do to change this effectively? The sharing of these stories does not affect them because they either do not view them or do not care, and younger generations can be taught from people who do care, but what do we do for these people now and their progeny?
Ozacoter 3 years ago
I agree. A lot of change can happen inside a generation but most of it occurs in between them. The world will be a less bigoted place once the silent geberation and the boomers are gone.
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Apollo 3 years ago
My first year working at a summer camp the director cut our break from the required 2 hours a day to half an hour a day, which was against the law by the way. Forced all of the staff except for the office staff to go to the Christian church service the camp put on on Sundays and called me a heathen whore in front of everyone because I admitted to being a Hellenic polytheist and a wiccan. He refused to pay us on time. Called me and my male best friend into his office and proceeded to yell at us for 30 minutes during our breakfast break because he thought that we were too close of friends. He yelled at me and docked my pay because I passed out due to exhaustion because I had been awake for around 19 hours straight doing the jobs of 3 people. He was fired and banned from ever running another summer camp.
Victoria Pitt 3 years ago
Hmm. I have lots of stories but one of the shorter ones is a time when I was frustrated with the rude, sarcastic and unprofessional behavior of a woman co-worker. She had written me another email that was so terrible, I didn't know how to respond. The company president was there, so I showed him the email and asked why does she get away acting like this all the time? Do you see what I am referring to? He reads it, then says "oh she must be on her rag". He starts to walk out of the office but stops and turns around with a big smile on his face and say's "you bitches are all alike." Yes, he thought he was funny, and decided possibly offending me was worth making his dumb ass joke. HRs response you ask? "He's just trying to be joke around and be friendly..." Family owned business, no accountability.
Kiss Army 3 years ago
I work in administration at a prison and during my orientation training we had to take a defensive tactics course that include correctional officers who were in annual training. When we were split into groups practicing defensive moves, one officer groped my breast and then during another maneuver, he touched my lower frontal lady bits and I gave him the benefit of the doubt that it was and accident but after the class he whispered in my ear "I want you to know I didn't mean anything by that, I just want you to know what you are in for as a young hot women working in this environment." I was floored and went straight to my very large brother-in-law who happened to be one of the instructors. I don't know what my BIL did but he never bothered me again and would not even look me in the eye for the rest of the years he worked here.
Lea S. 3 years ago
I was at a company Christmas party for the YMCA I worked at. I was playing pool and one of the older, male, higher-ups walked over for no reason other than to tell me how good I looked with a pool cue in my hands. What?
KombatBunni 3 years ago
This is when you tell him well I love to smack tiny balls into pockets with a big stick. I said that once to some scumbag in a club after he tried to harass me about bending over to play pool..he left in a bit of a hurry
Load More Replies...
Tracy Sellars 3 years ago
Just had a job interview and final line on the position description said they needed someone who could remove emotion and bounce back from difficult and/or challenging interactions. When I asked about it they basically admitted position involved people screaming at you. That is a nope from me.
Caroline Driver 3 years ago
Office jobs seem to be the worst for this kind of accepted sexism, although retail is almost as bad. I'm glad I work for a small family retail company, with a female manager and a female CEO who leads from the front.
Salma Ben 3 years ago
I worked at a company as a project leader, onyl woman, and i always pointed it out when their comments were out of line. For example when the pandemic started and i was the only one wearing a mask, my boss said "hey at least you don't need to wear make up now". Or when one day i was wearing a similar shirt color as the secretary (who LOVED the attention and the dirty jokes) and one guy said "you guys look the same, but one is a C and the other is a D". So they bullied me until i got depression and took a sick leave for 5 weeks. After coming back, I was bullied even more for taking time off. When i told our ceos (man and woman) they told me they're aware of it and the woman ceo is still getting comments like that too. But when they wanted me gone, everyone denied everything and said I was the problem. I hope they all have a miserable life.
marianne eliza 3 years ago
How many generations have to be born and die before men evolve a bit?
Hugo Raible 3 years ago
You realize many of these had female bosses, do you? Are you ignorant or just sexist?
Load More Replies...
AzKhaleesi 3 years ago
Currently going through this... I work for a HUGE state agency. I have worked OT steady for YEARS. Like clock work. Nasty woman who is in charge of OT in a particular area I work is going through a nasty divorce and found out that currently I am trying to work as much OT as possible to pay for said wedding and blocked me from overtime. So much so that she made up lies to get me indefinitely banned. Also this comes right at a time I am up for a promotion and it could mess that up too. And since I know it's retaliation, she knows it's hard to prove retaliation so kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Annemarie Mattheyse 3 years ago
Hearing that a candidate who was interviewed for a job was disliked because she "asked about work-life balance." She still got the job, but with a shrug, because she's only a temp.
Seabeast 3 years ago
Some of these appear to be from the UK, judging by the wording. Brit men can also be real pigs.
Load More Replies... Iapetos 3 years ago
Why do you choose to ignore the many occasions BP posted something about toxic women? Such as the "nice girls" post from I think it was last week? Get over yourself! It's not about men vs women, it's about calling out disgusting behavior. Don't be offended because the people called out share one demographical characteristic with you.
Load More Replies...
Iapetos 3 years ago
Makes me want to smack all of them. In the face. With something very heavy.
Sasy 3 years ago
I could not read after 20 these are horrible. So horrible they need to be printed out and available in all companies as cards and posters, there needs to also be cards like in sports that if someone is out of line you can just give them a card and they will know. It should also be very clear that anything said in such manner is allowed to be not only reported but publicly displayed and the name of the person clear. This should be a very set in stone terms of employment for any company. Just for one moment imagine what you are saying is being said to your Daughter or Mother, or Son or Father, because Women are guilty of sexist behavior also.
Mimi777 3 years ago
I worked at a small family owned business. I dropped some papers and bent down to pick them up my boss said "damn I love that view" his wife worked there as well and was in the next room. I finally got fed up and quit. It was really good pay but i couldn't deal with his numerous sexual comments he'd randomly make and it kept getting worse and worse.
KombatBunni 3 years ago
I would have said I’ll tell your wife you said that, or asked him if he says that to her. What a pig
Load More Replies... Lea S. 3 years ago (edited)
I had made a mistake, I'd confided in my female boss of a year that I was worried I hadn't got my period. I thought we had a real good relationship, she let me leave to go get a test at the women's clinic. When everything turned out fine she told me 'maybe you'll keep your legs closed now.' Forget that I'd been in a committed relationship with one man for two years.
Rae Reyn 3 years ago
My first "real" job was a grease monkey at an oil change place. There was one other woman there but she was customer service while I spent my shift in the pit. My boss asked me if I could wear make up to be more on (service lady)'s level. No. No I will not be wasting make up to be an oil covered cave troll. Surprisingly, I have had mostly positive experiences being a female automotive tech.
EA 3 years ago (edited)
After wearing a dress with leather panels to work my boss made a joke about how my ‘real self’ was coming out. IT support by day, dominatrix by night. It spread round the office and all the guys teased me about it for months. In another job, the boss said in front of my team, let’s get you a guy, we’ll grab the first guy we see and get you both in a hotel room, cos you need a good shag to loosen up. Also asked me if I was attracted to him would I have sex with him, there and then?
Iapetos 3 years ago
I guess it was their way of begging for a good whipping.
Load More Replies... Ozacoter 3 years ago
I had a lot of bad experiences with bosses, from being asked if I wanted to get pregnant in an interview to my boss of my last internship almost failing me and calling me "inmature and irresponsible" for getting very ill and need to go a few days to the hospital for tests. But the worst was when I did research in Germany. My contract was of part time and I was earning 600 euros a month. They made us work 50-75 hours a week. I needed the money and invested a lot traveling there so quitting wasn't an option. I designed an alternative schedule so we could all work 40h (still like double that what I was getting paid for). My coworkers (the bosses girlfriend and a suckup with no personality) called me "a traitor" for wanting to reduce everybody's hours. My boss told me that "If I worked so little I was of no use for him". I contacted the university to explain them the situation when I quit and they just said that they were sorry that I wasn't happy there.
I want cake 3 years ago (edited)
Labour laws in Europe overall are quite good, but internships fall outside of those laws which is widely abused. I never did an internship and so never got anywhere in my chosen career direction (art/architecture history) because all internships were full time either without pay or for 195-250 euro per month, and I have too much self respect for that. My time is worth more than that and either way, I couldn't afford to do that anyway. I couldn't exactly pay my rent with all that lovely experience they promised.
Load More Replies... Yvette Desmarais 3 years ago
Talk about cringe. Why is it that the only way to change this seems to be for the victim to leave?
Victoria Pitt 3 years ago
It's true. I had a sexist boss for 6 years and every time I went to report him to HR it was turned around on me. "Well, Did you tell him it made you uncomfortable??" Like, it's harassment, he is well aware he's making me uncomfortable, that's why he's doing it. Yea I waited until I found a new job where I negotiated 20k salary increase from that one, then split.
Load More Replies... Random Anon 3 years ago
In my teens, I worked in the mall after school for extra cash. It's common to run into parents of school mates. One particularly affluent mom actually said to her kid, who is the younger brother of a guy in my grade "You need to study hard so you don't become like that". "That" was referring to me, said in their native tongue, which I understood. I have darker skin tone so she assumed I wouldn't understand her. So two decades later, I bumped into the older brother and learnt his lil brother is going back to rehab for alcoholism. Now I'm not wealthy my any stretch but I think I'm doing alright.
somnomania 3 years ago
what i've learned here is that every woman should carry an audio recorder or have ready access to one on her phone, and just activate it as soon as a man seems to be approaching her for any reason
Victoria Pitt 3 years ago (edited)
Wish I had done that at my old job years ago. Oh my gosh. I would be a rich woman, but more importantly, that pig would have gotten what he deserved.
Load More Replies... Johanne Couvrette 3 years ago
Being told , i must be on my period or menopausal , cause i expressed my opinion in a louder voice so i could be heard over the yelling that was going on
Ali Kovach 3 years ago
I was 19 and worked as a groom at a saddlebred stable. My boss the trainer and the other grooms had all gone to a horse show for the week so was just left there alone to care for the remaining horses. The trainers boyfriend probably in his 40s and a veterinarian had come in to check on one of the foals. I was mucking out a stall when he leaned on the door and said he would love to have a sexual encounter with me. I said I don’t think my boyfriend would go for that and neither do I. I quit the next week. I also told the trainer what happened and why I was leaving. She docked my pay for one of the showhorses that was on my string who had chewed on her reins.
Bex Hallihan 3 years ago
I work in an extremely male-dominated industry. I'm the only woman on my depot and I have NEVER had issues like that with anyone at this company. Previous jobs are a different matter however...
Kill-Bunny 3 years ago
After I've got married, I've started developing some health issues and gaining weight because of it. Every time I had a sick leave or did not participate in company activities, I got my belly stared at. I've got straight asked If I was pregnant or trying to get pregnant point black, randomly, instead of "hello" multiple times on and on. I think some people even thought that I was lying about it and decided not to be friends anymore since, well... if you're pregnant, you're going to leave anyway. It lasted 2 years. I got diagnosed with endometriosis, got an operation and after coming back after it, I was ignored for almost 4 months, my boss literally walked by me avoiding eye contact. People were almost not talking to me and later on, bosses decided to move my office to other place, so I had to pack and unpack about 50 square meters office-library full of books and 10 years worth of documents. After abdomen surgery. Alone. My boss (a female) knew about my health issues.
I want cake 3 years ago
So.. You got ostracised and discriminated against for being sick? And they didn't even try to hide it. What a bunch of disgusting scumbuckets.
Load More Replies... McPanda 3 years ago
The amount of these stories that exist make me wonder whether or not there is something that can be done generationally. This is apparently not going to change for people of a certain age group. I don't mean this in an ageist way, but the anecdotal evidence provided here was always an older man, or a man in some power position, talking down to a woman. It does not seem to me that these people are teachable, which seems defeatist. What on Earth could we do to change this effectively? The sharing of these stories does not affect them because they either do not view them or do not care, and younger generations can be taught from people who do care, but what do we do for these people now and their progeny?
Ozacoter 3 years ago
I agree. A lot of change can happen inside a generation but most of it occurs in between them. The world will be a less bigoted place once the silent geberation and the boomers are gone.
Load More Replies... Apollo 3 years ago
My first year working at a summer camp the director cut our break from the required 2 hours a day to half an hour a day, which was against the law by the way. Forced all of the staff except for the office staff to go to the Christian church service the camp put on on Sundays and called me a heathen whore in front of everyone because I admitted to being a Hellenic polytheist and a wiccan. He refused to pay us on time. Called me and my male best friend into his office and proceeded to yell at us for 30 minutes during our breakfast break because he thought that we were too close of friends. He yelled at me and docked my pay because I passed out due to exhaustion because I had been awake for around 19 hours straight doing the jobs of 3 people. He was fired and banned from ever running another summer camp.
Victoria Pitt 3 years ago
Hmm. I have lots of stories but one of the shorter ones is a time when I was frustrated with the rude, sarcastic and unprofessional behavior of a woman co-worker. She had written me another email that was so terrible, I didn't know how to respond. The company president was there, so I showed him the email and asked why does she get away acting like this all the time? Do you see what I am referring to? He reads it, then says "oh she must be on her rag". He starts to walk out of the office but stops and turns around with a big smile on his face and say's "you bitches are all alike." Yes, he thought he was funny, and decided possibly offending me was worth making his dumb ass joke. HRs response you ask? "He's just trying to be joke around and be friendly..." Family owned business, no accountability.
Kiss Army 3 years ago
I work in administration at a prison and during my orientation training we had to take a defensive tactics course that include correctional officers who were in annual training. When we were split into groups practicing defensive moves, one officer groped my breast and then during another maneuver, he touched my lower frontal lady bits and I gave him the benefit of the doubt that it was and accident but after the class he whispered in my ear "I want you to know I didn't mean anything by that, I just want you to know what you are in for as a young hot women working in this environment." I was floored and went straight to my very large brother-in-law who happened to be one of the instructors. I don't know what my BIL did but he never bothered me again and would not even look me in the eye for the rest of the years he worked here.
Lea S. 3 years ago
I was at a company Christmas party for the YMCA I worked at. I was playing pool and one of the older, male, higher-ups walked over for no reason other than to tell me how good I looked with a pool cue in my hands. What?
KombatBunni 3 years ago
This is when you tell him well I love to smack tiny balls into pockets with a big stick. I said that once to some scumbag in a club after he tried to harass me about bending over to play pool..he left in a bit of a hurry
Load More Replies... Tracy Sellars 3 years ago
Just had a job interview and final line on the position description said they needed someone who could remove emotion and bounce back from difficult and/or challenging interactions. When I asked about it they basically admitted position involved people screaming at you. That is a nope from me.
Caroline Driver 3 years ago
Office jobs seem to be the worst for this kind of accepted sexism, although retail is almost as bad. I'm glad I work for a small family retail company, with a female manager and a female CEO who leads from the front.
Salma Ben 3 years ago
I worked at a company as a project leader, onyl woman, and i always pointed it out when their comments were out of line. For example when the pandemic started and i was the only one wearing a mask, my boss said "hey at least you don't need to wear make up now". Or when one day i was wearing a similar shirt color as the secretary (who LOVED the attention and the dirty jokes) and one guy said "you guys look the same, but one is a C and the other is a D". So they bullied me until i got depression and took a sick leave for 5 weeks. After coming back, I was bullied even more for taking time off. When i told our ceos (man and woman) they told me they're aware of it and the woman ceo is still getting comments like that too. But when they wanted me gone, everyone denied everything and said I was the problem. I hope they all have a miserable life.
marianne eliza 3 years ago
How many generations have to be born and die before men evolve a bit?
Hugo Raible 3 years ago
You realize many of these had female bosses, do you? Are you ignorant or just sexist?
Load More Replies... AzKhaleesi 3 years ago
Currently going through this... I work for a HUGE state agency. I have worked OT steady for YEARS. Like clock work. Nasty woman who is in charge of OT in a particular area I work is going through a nasty divorce and found out that currently I am trying to work as much OT as possible to pay for said wedding and blocked me from overtime. So much so that she made up lies to get me indefinitely banned. Also this comes right at a time I am up for a promotion and it could mess that up too. And since I know it's retaliation, she knows it's hard to prove retaliation so kinda stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Annemarie Mattheyse 3 years ago
Hearing that a candidate who was interviewed for a job was disliked because she "asked about work-life balance." She still got the job, but with a shrug, because she's only a temp.
Seabeast 3 years ago
Some of these appear to be from the UK, judging by the wording. Brit men can also be real pigs.
Load More Replies... Iapetos 3 years ago
Why do you choose to ignore the many occasions BP posted something about toxic women? Such as the "nice girls" post from I think it was last week? Get over yourself! It's not about men vs women, it's about calling out disgusting behavior. Don't be offended because the people called out share one demographical characteristic with you.
Load More Replies... You May Like 40 Of The Biggest Double Standards In Society, According To People Online Assistant Throws Herself A $2,000 Farewell Party As A Popularity Test, Ends Up Without A Job
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