50 Terrifying Stories That Prove Why Women Are Afraid Of Rejecting Men, As Shared By The ‘Bye Felipe’ Instagram Account
In a sense, online dating is like gambling — only very few hit the jackpot. The chances of meeting someone kind, generous, gentle, and compassionate are, well, extremely low. Yet, thousands of lonely souls still spend hours looking at their screens, being lured into believing their one true love is just a swipe away.
But as so many of us have learned from personal experience, this whole dating game is not for the faint of heart. It’s full of uncomfortable situations, tasteless jokes, and pretentious people who believe they somehow have a right to treat others like pawns in their little games. And there are plenty of women who had the "pleasure" of encountering such guys and decided to call them out.
Enter Bye Felipe, an Instagram account that posts screenshots submitted by women who seem to be on a mission to expose the most vulgar and downright creepy online daters out there. We handpicked some of the most surprising posts we found on the account, so continue scrolling and be sure to tell us what you think about them in the comments!
This post may include affiliate links.
Bye Felipe (the name is a play on the Bye Felicia meme, often used as a dismissive farewell) was created in 2014 by author, speaker, and podcast host Alexandra Tweten. It started as a means to allow women to share the most offensive messages they have received via dating sites and apps and hold men accountable for online harassment.
When Tweten started posting screenshots of her online dating misfortunes, her email flooded with submissions from others with similar experiences. "I realized these hostile messages were a trend that women see online," she told The Huffington Post. "That started a conversation about creating an Instagram to keep all of these insane messages so we could discuss them. All women get some degree of creepy or weird messages when they sign up for online dating sites."
"It's a standard reaction that I've now seen over and over again with the submissions," she noted. "Guy hits on girl, girl doesn't respond, guy lashes out with insulting message. It really shows the entitlement these guys feel, and I think it shows our cultural misogyny problem."
To better understand the world of online romance, we reached out to Abi Blears, a UK-based dating coach and matchmaker. "Apps can be a brilliant addition to meeting people in real life and enable us to connect with people we might not cross paths with otherwise. However, there are downsides to them," she told Bored Panda.
Blears explained that apps give us a false perception of having a great deal of choice and might make us feel like people are easier to replace. "They also inadvertently make us focus on things that might not be that important," she added.
"They encourage us to make snap decisions about people based on very little information. Another downside to an app is that you could fall victim to a catfish (someone who is pretending to be someone they are not), in the real world it’s harder to be misled."
When asked why so many women have online dating horror stories to share, Blears believes this is not necessarily specific to dating apps. "Everyone who has dated a lot has likely had a bad experience somewhere along the way or dated someone who behaves less than ideal. People tend to share negative experiences and remember negative experiences more readily than positive ones," she said and added that for every negative online dating story out there, there’s likely a positive one.
Yet, matching with someone on an app doesn’t have the same level of accountability compared to meeting them in real life through friends or in the workplace. "You’re more likely to be respectful of someone if you know it could impact your peer relationships or life in the future. If you meet someone on an app, there’s less of a chance that you’ll run into them in the future or that your peers will hear about any nefarious behavior," she said.
Are this kids not having a mother ? Sisters ? Nothing in their brain?
While toxic masculinity might be one of the main reasons men believe they have a right to act this way, Blears said it’s important to not encourage the narrative that men shouldn’t express their emotions. Women can be abusive too and men are less likely to report abuse because it’s deemed by some to be emasculating, she added. "That said, it’s not even nearly on the same scale and toxic masculinity does need to be explored and dealt with."
When it comes to online harassment, each situation is different. However, if someone is being directly abusive, "the best thing to do is to remove yourself from the interaction. If you’re on an app, block and report the person. It’s important to know your own boundaries and uphold them."
"For example, you might have a zero-tolerance for being sworn at and the person you’re talking to swears at you. If you think they are generally reasonable, the approach would be to express how it makes you feel when they do that, express what you want in the future, and express the consequences if they repeat to offend. Then stick to your word."
She continued: "It’s also important not to get too wrapped up with people who are only nice from time to time, if someone isn’t consistently nice then they aren’t nice and it’s not your role to change them, as tempting as that might be."
Leak all the data of this guy together with this screenshot.
As you scroll through this post, you might feel discouraged to dive back into the deep waters of the dating pool. If that’s the case, Blears has some suggestions for you. If having nightmarish experiences is a reoccurring theme, she advised considering how you’re using the apps, finding out if there are any common issues, and seeing how you can avoid repeating them.
“If it’s a one-off experience, it’s important to remember that whilst there are bad people online, there are also many good people out there so don’t let one negative experience tarnish your entire outlook. Pace your relationships slowly moving forward so that you do not become overly invested in someone very quickly. In time, people reveal their true colors so staying grounded in reality and not rushing things is key."
Blears told Bored Panda that the most important factor with online dating is not only your physical safety but your emotional safety too. "You want to only continue conversing with people who are consistent in their behavior and who make you feel either good or neutral."
"It might come as a surprise but someone who is overly keen very early on might not be as safe an option as a guy who is more neutral and takes time to reveal his feelings. There’s a balance to be struck," the dating coach added.
"If you aren’t sure about taking it from online to offline, it’s perhaps wise to suggest a phone call or a video date before meeting up. If you’re generally worried about safety, you can suggest a daytime date somewhere public and be sure to inform a friend of your whereabouts. No matter how tempting, I would not recommend traveling in someone’s car when on a first date, going to their home or bringing them to yours," Blears concluded.
Bigot or chaser, either way not a good first impression!
Load More Replies...Maybe he wanted to talk about his car's transmission that's been giving him issues?
I don't see the harm in asking. I'd want to be sure of whom I was talking to.
I had someone ask me that too. It's dead before it starts when that is your opening line.
They should have asked was that their preference as that's what it seems they normally "sense" and reach out to.
I've gotten this message often followed up with some sort of declaration that I must have had plastic surgery... like wtf!!
Why? Do I look like a man? At least I look like a man when you look like a boy
Horny, in a hotel, desperately looking for matches... You should reconsider your life, that's so low level.
Again, does this s**t EVER work? Why do guys keep trying it? It's so gross.
Oh, this fragile male ego... Mine must be incredibly strong, since I never called names when drunk.
Maybe I am just old fashioned, but don't men ever just want a conversation? Seriously why is text one or text two a reference to a penis or a request for tit pics? I am a gentleman, I leave those until at least text number 5.
I love posts like this because it teaches me new and creative ways to respond to bs.
I've been in college classes and haven't taken notes as hard as I have on this article!
Load More Replies...I'm just here for the #notallmen comments from the men who continue to feel maligned by women who clearly don't know their place.
The first lesson in gun safety is that all guns, unless in pieces on the floor, are loaded. Even if you remove the magazine. I feel like women have to hold that same thing to be true for men. I've always been friendly and more concerned with trying to make sure my women-friends are comfortable in every environment, but a stranger won't know that about me, so I have no reason to take it personally when she keeps her distance and acts like I'm a loaded gun. Sucks, but I understand it and I'm not hurt over it.
Load More Replies...This whole posting just reminds me of something my wife told me years ago. Men are afraid women will laugh at them. Women are afraid men will kill them.
The statistics of women and LGBTQ+ murdered over rejection or even perceived humiliation is crazy.
Load More Replies...So I have this fantasy about removing all porn from the internet. And replacing it with porn produced for women, where they are not treated and used like a piece of meat. And if that's not working, put a virus in a misbehaving man's coputer, which turns the face of every porn actress into his mom's.
There is feminist porn out there actually. Just not much of it, sadly.
Load More Replies...I feel like some people should be made to attend a two week long seminar called "Human interaction 101" at turning 18 before we release them into the wild of general society.
Or parents could teach their boys accountability and respect for all living things 🤷♀️ but what do I know. I dont have kids....just have to deal with all the ones that weren't raised to view women as HUMANS.
Load More Replies...It's creepy how these all follow the same general pattern... sudden begging for sеx, followed by insults and "you're fаt" when it becomes clear it didn't work. Yikes!
Imagine if this was in real life, and it often is. These "men" are often viewed publicly as upstanding gentlemen, but behind doors treat their partners like this. It's why many women were happy to just go along with it because they were tired of being beaten, insulted and assaulted.
Load More Replies...I love how all this incels insist they: have endless string of women just waiting to suck their d/IQ 21093 / are "alpha males" / incomparably hung, etc. Yes sir, you're very believable.
I tend to counter with "methinks thou dost protest too much"
Load More Replies...Those apps need a feature that lets you forward these unhinged tirades to these creeps mothers, so they can see how their sons treat women.
Screenshot, find their families on facebook(which is usually very easy to do), and send all the screenshots, with unsolicited dik picks, to mom. Sit back and enjoy
Load More Replies...I've reached the point where I can't even rage and fume at these posts( if you've seen my drunken rage posts in the past ) I just fukn despair some times. I mean what the actual fk are these guys on about? Is this how they spend their time? Get a fkn hobby!
Look, will this frog help? desert-rai...db-png.jpg
Load More Replies...I’m continually baffled by men who use this type of approach, haven’t they seen how ineffective it is? Haven’t they seen the ridicule all over the internet? Haven’t they had female friends, sisters, cousins, mothers? Don’t they see that women are human and respect is a two way street? It’s really not that difficult to talk to women, it’s something that’s kept the human race going for many a year and yet here we are looking at Neanderthals who want naked photos and are sending d**k pics. If you are sending d**k pics then you are in-line for ridicule, you truly are unaware of what women want. My partner assures me that she has no desire for me to send her d**k pics 😂
That's my question, too. Setting morality aside for the moment, how do they not see that it doesn't work? I just don't get it.
Load More Replies...Waiting right here for the insecure creepy men to show up and try to defend this.
My daughter thinks I want her to learn self defense for school bullies. It's for these guys.
It's both, they start in school. I was sexually assaulted at school by the boys from 5th grade on. Always got the "boys will be boys" or "what did you do to cause this" response. Existed? Thank school system, thanks parents.
Load More Replies...I decided I'm not going to keep reading these. They are absolutely horrible. I can't imagine what makes these people think any of this is okay.
I found the women's replies empowering. This behavior needs to be shamed and ridiculed. Their mommies did not teach them right from wrong.
Load More Replies...And also such a wonderful reminder of why being contentedly single is so awesome (I'm a huge fan of healthy relationships in all their forms and also a huge fan of the single life)
Load More Replies...This entire post is so depressing, these are the so called men now? I just turned 40 and would hate to think I'm old fashioned but I would never speak to a woman that way let alone one I don't even know.
I think it is really sad when women say "why do men act like this". I'll tell you, its because these are not MEN. What you are seeing is some backwards evolving species of men, and for some reason they jumped right into the AMOEBA stage. These are some unclassified brainless upright walking wanna be sapiens that have yet to get their new latin name. may i suggest Homo Stultus Sine Cerebri (translate it).
To quote Vincent Price from a movie i can't rem the name of lol, "I feel that man has ruled this world as a stumbling demented child-king long enough!" Time for another species to take over.
Load More Replies...Funny how every one of these where there's a profile pic of the dude, it's always a "bruh" dude. Maybe you know, don't swipe right on bruhs? I know there's a shitton more this country needs to do about toxic trash, but I think that'd be a great start.
These stuff always makes me shake my head. Since i work in a field where have to take care and delete stuff like this on a daily base makes it even worse. And guys... no need to go for the #notallmen.... woman know that, but its safer to ASSUME all men are like this, than falling for that one in hundreds of men which can end dangerously. Stay safe everyone
My mom makes comments about how I missed out by marrying my husband straight out of high-school. I have been married 18 years to my best friend and haven't ever had to deal with crap like this. If we split up, I'd prefer lifelong singleness over this crap.
"Blears says, 'If this happens a lot, look at what you're doing' ": so it's all HER fault if men act disgustingly online.
I recently found a book titled Men Who Hate Women. It's probably the most scary book I've ever read. Apparently there are men on the internet who blame women for their lack of ability to attract women. (The fact that they treat women like sh*t doesn't seem to enter their heads.) I wonder if this disgusting behavior on dating sites comes from these very same men.
This is what I call pornspeak. Those guys spend too much time in their bedrooms watching porn, when they should get out and live more normal life.
This is what I call pornspeak. Those guys spend too much time in their bedrooms watching porn, when they should get out and live a more normal life.
What a bunch of pathetic losers. And none of them can understand why they're still single?
I met my husband at 15 and at 42 I'm so glad I skipped this crap (although I like to think I could handle it well). I have had some brief exchanges when out with friends but nothing like in this post. I can't imagine my sons acting like this and constantly worry for my daughter (although she is a strong woman with a wonderful boyfriend). I really hope that we've done our jobs well and the boys are respectful/decent humans and our daughter kicks butt
When did men start disrespecting women so horribly.Is it because the complete sexualization of women now from music to advertisement to movies showing half naked women and only worth sex first before anything else.
Ego made out of paper in a lot of these. First off, these guys sound like some sex crazed psycho rapists. And, it really shows they based their perception of women on porno videos.
As a male I'm sorry to all your females!! This absolutely disgusting!! Most of these men seem like virgins and incredibly uneducated! The spelling by most of them gave me a seizure! Again sorry Queens
Most of these guys remind me of my ex-bf who was super cringey in the sense that he would rp everything. Now don't get me wrong, i like a bot of roleplaying, but the s**t he was doing was uncalled for. He would also m^^^^^bate on call with me when i didn't even want him to, and i played it off as me being scared that my parents would see. but i liked it. I f*****g hated it and i'm glad i don't talk to him anymore bcs he was a lying cheating bastard. I did hook up with his girlfriend though, i love her to bits
Any of these that were from Tinder or the like, WTF did they expect? Everyone on there are just hoes.
Disgusting thing SOME men/women do. Ive been in a perfect relationship with a guy i will marry since i was 12 so i skipped this b******t.
Haven't heard of a single woman sending unwanted vagina pics.
Load More Replies...In my experience, European men do not behave better. At all.
Load More Replies...Boy are you woefully ignorant then. Not sure how many real live women you've met but I promise almost every single one will have many, many stories, encounters and incidents with your fabled 1%. It'd be amazing if 99% of men weren't like this but thats not the world we are in. Even your guy friends, that you may think are awesome dudes, will inevitably behave differently when you aren't around and interacting with women; for better or worse.
Load More Replies...How many unsolicited vagina pictures have you received Francc? When was the last time a women introduced herself to you for the first time by saying "hey Francc my pussy is the best you'll ever have" and did it turn you on? Yeah. Me either. What about the last time a women called you fat m**********r and threatened you with violence and rape because you didn't like her vagina picture? I mean, women are known for getting violent and rapey so I can understand your fear and trepidation but if you are being sexually harassed by a women there are support groups available and I strongly encourage you to join them. Just be aware that women will sometimes come into these support places and tell you that it's your fault for not accepting their advances and insults and try and defend women for their behavior.
Load More Replies...Maybe I am just old fashioned, but don't men ever just want a conversation? Seriously why is text one or text two a reference to a penis or a request for tit pics? I am a gentleman, I leave those until at least text number 5.
I love posts like this because it teaches me new and creative ways to respond to bs.
I've been in college classes and haven't taken notes as hard as I have on this article!
Load More Replies...I'm just here for the #notallmen comments from the men who continue to feel maligned by women who clearly don't know their place.
The first lesson in gun safety is that all guns, unless in pieces on the floor, are loaded. Even if you remove the magazine. I feel like women have to hold that same thing to be true for men. I've always been friendly and more concerned with trying to make sure my women-friends are comfortable in every environment, but a stranger won't know that about me, so I have no reason to take it personally when she keeps her distance and acts like I'm a loaded gun. Sucks, but I understand it and I'm not hurt over it.
Load More Replies...This whole posting just reminds me of something my wife told me years ago. Men are afraid women will laugh at them. Women are afraid men will kill them.
The statistics of women and LGBTQ+ murdered over rejection or even perceived humiliation is crazy.
Load More Replies...So I have this fantasy about removing all porn from the internet. And replacing it with porn produced for women, where they are not treated and used like a piece of meat. And if that's not working, put a virus in a misbehaving man's coputer, which turns the face of every porn actress into his mom's.
There is feminist porn out there actually. Just not much of it, sadly.
Load More Replies...I feel like some people should be made to attend a two week long seminar called "Human interaction 101" at turning 18 before we release them into the wild of general society.
Or parents could teach their boys accountability and respect for all living things 🤷♀️ but what do I know. I dont have kids....just have to deal with all the ones that weren't raised to view women as HUMANS.
Load More Replies...It's creepy how these all follow the same general pattern... sudden begging for sеx, followed by insults and "you're fаt" when it becomes clear it didn't work. Yikes!
Imagine if this was in real life, and it often is. These "men" are often viewed publicly as upstanding gentlemen, but behind doors treat their partners like this. It's why many women were happy to just go along with it because they were tired of being beaten, insulted and assaulted.
Load More Replies...I love how all this incels insist they: have endless string of women just waiting to suck their d/IQ 21093 / are "alpha males" / incomparably hung, etc. Yes sir, you're very believable.
I tend to counter with "methinks thou dost protest too much"
Load More Replies...Those apps need a feature that lets you forward these unhinged tirades to these creeps mothers, so they can see how their sons treat women.
Screenshot, find their families on facebook(which is usually very easy to do), and send all the screenshots, with unsolicited dik picks, to mom. Sit back and enjoy
Load More Replies...I've reached the point where I can't even rage and fume at these posts( if you've seen my drunken rage posts in the past ) I just fukn despair some times. I mean what the actual fk are these guys on about? Is this how they spend their time? Get a fkn hobby!
Look, will this frog help? desert-rai...db-png.jpg
Load More Replies...I’m continually baffled by men who use this type of approach, haven’t they seen how ineffective it is? Haven’t they seen the ridicule all over the internet? Haven’t they had female friends, sisters, cousins, mothers? Don’t they see that women are human and respect is a two way street? It’s really not that difficult to talk to women, it’s something that’s kept the human race going for many a year and yet here we are looking at Neanderthals who want naked photos and are sending d**k pics. If you are sending d**k pics then you are in-line for ridicule, you truly are unaware of what women want. My partner assures me that she has no desire for me to send her d**k pics 😂
That's my question, too. Setting morality aside for the moment, how do they not see that it doesn't work? I just don't get it.
Load More Replies...Waiting right here for the insecure creepy men to show up and try to defend this.
My daughter thinks I want her to learn self defense for school bullies. It's for these guys.
It's both, they start in school. I was sexually assaulted at school by the boys from 5th grade on. Always got the "boys will be boys" or "what did you do to cause this" response. Existed? Thank school system, thanks parents.
Load More Replies...I decided I'm not going to keep reading these. They are absolutely horrible. I can't imagine what makes these people think any of this is okay.
I found the women's replies empowering. This behavior needs to be shamed and ridiculed. Their mommies did not teach them right from wrong.
Load More Replies...And also such a wonderful reminder of why being contentedly single is so awesome (I'm a huge fan of healthy relationships in all their forms and also a huge fan of the single life)
Load More Replies...This entire post is so depressing, these are the so called men now? I just turned 40 and would hate to think I'm old fashioned but I would never speak to a woman that way let alone one I don't even know.
I think it is really sad when women say "why do men act like this". I'll tell you, its because these are not MEN. What you are seeing is some backwards evolving species of men, and for some reason they jumped right into the AMOEBA stage. These are some unclassified brainless upright walking wanna be sapiens that have yet to get their new latin name. may i suggest Homo Stultus Sine Cerebri (translate it).
To quote Vincent Price from a movie i can't rem the name of lol, "I feel that man has ruled this world as a stumbling demented child-king long enough!" Time for another species to take over.
Load More Replies...Funny how every one of these where there's a profile pic of the dude, it's always a "bruh" dude. Maybe you know, don't swipe right on bruhs? I know there's a shitton more this country needs to do about toxic trash, but I think that'd be a great start.
These stuff always makes me shake my head. Since i work in a field where have to take care and delete stuff like this on a daily base makes it even worse. And guys... no need to go for the #notallmen.... woman know that, but its safer to ASSUME all men are like this, than falling for that one in hundreds of men which can end dangerously. Stay safe everyone
My mom makes comments about how I missed out by marrying my husband straight out of high-school. I have been married 18 years to my best friend and haven't ever had to deal with crap like this. If we split up, I'd prefer lifelong singleness over this crap.
"Blears says, 'If this happens a lot, look at what you're doing' ": so it's all HER fault if men act disgustingly online.
I recently found a book titled Men Who Hate Women. It's probably the most scary book I've ever read. Apparently there are men on the internet who blame women for their lack of ability to attract women. (The fact that they treat women like sh*t doesn't seem to enter their heads.) I wonder if this disgusting behavior on dating sites comes from these very same men.
This is what I call pornspeak. Those guys spend too much time in their bedrooms watching porn, when they should get out and live more normal life.
This is what I call pornspeak. Those guys spend too much time in their bedrooms watching porn, when they should get out and live a more normal life.
What a bunch of pathetic losers. And none of them can understand why they're still single?
I met my husband at 15 and at 42 I'm so glad I skipped this crap (although I like to think I could handle it well). I have had some brief exchanges when out with friends but nothing like in this post. I can't imagine my sons acting like this and constantly worry for my daughter (although she is a strong woman with a wonderful boyfriend). I really hope that we've done our jobs well and the boys are respectful/decent humans and our daughter kicks butt
When did men start disrespecting women so horribly.Is it because the complete sexualization of women now from music to advertisement to movies showing half naked women and only worth sex first before anything else.
Ego made out of paper in a lot of these. First off, these guys sound like some sex crazed psycho rapists. And, it really shows they based their perception of women on porno videos.
As a male I'm sorry to all your females!! This absolutely disgusting!! Most of these men seem like virgins and incredibly uneducated! The spelling by most of them gave me a seizure! Again sorry Queens
Most of these guys remind me of my ex-bf who was super cringey in the sense that he would rp everything. Now don't get me wrong, i like a bot of roleplaying, but the s**t he was doing was uncalled for. He would also m^^^^^bate on call with me when i didn't even want him to, and i played it off as me being scared that my parents would see. but i liked it. I f*****g hated it and i'm glad i don't talk to him anymore bcs he was a lying cheating bastard. I did hook up with his girlfriend though, i love her to bits
Any of these that were from Tinder or the like, WTF did they expect? Everyone on there are just hoes.
Disgusting thing SOME men/women do. Ive been in a perfect relationship with a guy i will marry since i was 12 so i skipped this b******t.
Haven't heard of a single woman sending unwanted vagina pics.
Load More Replies...In my experience, European men do not behave better. At all.
Load More Replies...Boy are you woefully ignorant then. Not sure how many real live women you've met but I promise almost every single one will have many, many stories, encounters and incidents with your fabled 1%. It'd be amazing if 99% of men weren't like this but thats not the world we are in. Even your guy friends, that you may think are awesome dudes, will inevitably behave differently when you aren't around and interacting with women; for better or worse.
Load More Replies...How many unsolicited vagina pictures have you received Francc? When was the last time a women introduced herself to you for the first time by saying "hey Francc my pussy is the best you'll ever have" and did it turn you on? Yeah. Me either. What about the last time a women called you fat m**********r and threatened you with violence and rape because you didn't like her vagina picture? I mean, women are known for getting violent and rapey so I can understand your fear and trepidation but if you are being sexually harassed by a women there are support groups available and I strongly encourage you to join them. Just be aware that women will sometimes come into these support places and tell you that it's your fault for not accepting their advances and insults and try and defend women for their behavior.
Load More Replies...