So much for Christmas spirit, i bet MIL thinks she's a good christian too. I don't understand how some people can celebrate Christmas all while being selfish heartless douchebags at the same time.

I'm an introvert. I hate social situations. A perfect holiday for me is sitting in my recliner in my pj's, alone, watching movies. That said - if someone asked if they could spend the day with me because they didn't want to be alone, I would welcome them (and tell them to wear their pjs).

We've had Christmas at my cousins for decades, and there is often someone included that several of us have never met but they didn't have anywhere else to go. And it has made our lives richer for being kind that way. Some of them still come often, some we never see again. But it is one meal on one day, and we are happy to share it.

If my husband didn't back me up and stay home with me and mom, I would be rethinking who I foolishly married.

I get the MIL's frustration, but... it's Christmas. My cousin's in-laws got divorced and we have invited her MIL to every xmas eve - an additional place-setting isn't that hard. And again...Christmas!

Good heavens... it's one extra person that they all know (maybe not know well, but they're not strangers), it really shouldn't be an issue. Yowzers, not much empathy from the in-laws, is there??

My parents had the big house, so every Christmas or Christmas eve, we'd have both sides of the family over! Thus, the YTA about not wanting to get to know the daughter's partners family is wild!!! Sure, your kid married someone, but you have no desire to meet or get to know their family? What happens when they have kids (aka grandkids)? That person will probably make them choose... that's sad.

It's such a pain when people try to gatekeep Christmas instead of spreading joy like we're supposed to.

There is no way on God's green earth my mom would be spending Christmas alone. Would never happen, would never even be a possibility. I lost her in my early teens, but there is just no way. I also couldn't imagine my MIL being so egotistical and cruel. I hear so many of these stories and am always in awe of how terrible people can be.

I personally hate when people extend my invitation to them to others without my consent. Knowing that her mother was feeling lonely she should have arranged for her to come over for Christmas and just went over to the in-laws for a few hours after her mom had left. If MIL wanted them to stay longer she'd have to extend her invitation to the OPs mom then (It's impolite to leave out a visiting house guest). think the MIL just doesn't like the OPs mother for some reason. It would be charitable and kind of the OPs MIL to have her mother over for Christmas but as another pointed out being divorced doesn't make you a tragic victim. Thr OP should definitely be supportive of her mom but shouldn't automatically expect to be able to bring her along to other people's events like carry-on luggage. Balancing different family obligations is a part and parcel of being married.

Oh my god, is this my brother and his witch wife? I had the same situation one year at Christmas. We invited my friend who'd been cheated on and laid off at the same time, and invited my husband's friend whose mom had just died so they wouldn't be alone. My brother and his then gf (now wife) got so mad and offended on how we invited other people to join. My mom wanted to invite more lol

I like that most of the responses are, "Stay with your mom."

Buy oversized boxing gloves and have the two mothers battle to see who gets your time - problem solved.

To be fair, your mil may be one of those people who hate change. Some of my family is on the spectrum and even small changes in a planned event can seem overwhelming to them. It isn't necessarily about gifts or resources, though she might have started overthinking about those things. As she barely knows your mother, it probably isn't anything personal. Still, she should have rolled with it and not let it stress her, especially as it wasn't even for the whole day and you would be there to help entertain her.

Ha!

If I were asked, I'd say no too. I'm not Christian and I just want to be comfortable and spend time with people I want. If I don't feel close to you I don't want to invite you. Op can ask, I can also say no, and I'll deal with the consequences. Op can also spend time with Mom, instead of me. I understand and no one is stopping Op. Would it be a nice thing to do? Maybe. I don't know, but I do know I don't want to be uncomfortable in my own place.

This comment has been deleted.