Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
3
Woman Uses Husband’s Condoms To Get Pregnant, Sis Spills The Beans He’s Ready For A Divorce
Trust is the secret sauce of any good relationship – without it, things get messy faster than spilled margaritas on Taco Tuesday. But for some people, honesty is apparently optional, and sneaky schemes are on the menu instead. When someone takes matters into their own hands, doing things behind their partner’s back, things are bound to blow up.
One Redditor learned this the hard way when her sister’s sneaky plan to baby-trap her husband came to light. And let’s just say, some people go to disturbing lengths just to create a tiny human. But this story? Oh, this is just next-level.
More info: Reddit
RELATED:
Marriage is supposed to be a team sport, not a solo DIY baby project
Image credits: Gabriel Bastelli / Pexels (not the actual photo)
One woman was accused of ruining her sister’s marriage after telling her husband she was trying to get pregnant behind his back
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The woman met up with her sister for drinks, where she confessed she had been using her husband’s condoms to try to get pregnant, as he says he never wants kids
Image credits: RDNE Stock project / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The shocked woman told her sister that what she is doing is a huge violation, as she doesn’t have her husband’s consent to have his baby
Image credits: stockking / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The woman told her sister’s husband about her plans, but was insulted by her sister and accused of turning her husband against her
Image credits: Emotional-Yak-2865
The woman was blamed by her family for ruining her sister’s marriage, as her husband is ready to get a divorce because of his wife’s pregnancy schemes
The OP (original poster) is the oldest of 3 sisters, with Emily being the youngest, at 27. Emily had always dreamed of motherhood, but there was a little snag: her husband, Tony, had been crystal clear that kids were a hard pass for him.
Now, this would be fine if Emily agreed. But, as you probably already guessed, she didn’t agree. Not only that, she even came up with a disturbing plan to create a tiny human behind her husband’s back. Drama, anyone?
On a boozy girls’ night, Emily confessed to the OP, aka her older sis, that she was secretly using a very unconventional method to try to get pregnant without her husband finding out. Let’s just say, her method involved salvaging certain used items from the trash. Yep, she was DIY-ing her way to motherhood with her husband’s used condoms. Sure, sure, that’s a very “sane” way of having a baby.
The OP was horrified, as you probably are too, comparing the act to its male equivalent, poking holes in condoms. She called it out for what it was – deceptive, unethical, and frankly, downright bananas. And, unable to shake the guilt, she took matters into her own hands and spilled the beans to Toby. His reaction? Pure disgust. But honestly, who can blame him?
Not long after, the OP’s phone exploded with Emily’s rage. Accusations flew, and the blame game went into overdrive. Emily accused her sister of jealousy, insecurity, and meddling. Words were said, bridges were burned, and the family holiday plans? Completely derailed. She’s been labeled the villain by her family, uninvited from Christmas, and left wondering if she overstepped.
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
But did she overstep or just did what she thought was morally right? After all, consent is not optional just because you are married; it is critical in every aspect of a relationship, especially when it comes to life-altering decisions like parenthood.
Interfering with contraception, aka reproductive coercion, could actually be classified as various criminal offenses, depending on the jurisdiction. Reproductive coercion is a term that sounds all official but boils down to something downright creepy. It’s not just about poking holes in condoms or secretly removing birth control devices; it’s about controlling someone’s choices and future.
Relationships are supposed to be partnerships, not power plays. If one person’s secretly tampering with the game plan, that’s a big old red flag waving in the wind. And, when lies and deception crash the party, trust and autonomy are shattered, leaving lasting scars on the relationship.
Lies, big or small, erode the foundation of trust and intimacy. Manipulating the truth in any way affects the relationship and deprives the other person of their freedom of choice. And what’s even worse, the pros say that lying leads to health issues, both mental and physical. I don’t know about you, but I think I’ll just stick to the truth.
What do you think of this story? Should the poster have stayed quiet, or did she do the right thing by telling the truth? Let us know in the comments!
Netizens side with the woman, saying she is not the jerk for telling her sister’s husband about his wife’s plan, as it’s not only disturbing but a form of abuse
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
Newsletter
Subscribe to Access
Exclusive Polls
By entering your email and clicking Subscribe, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Privacy Policy.
Thank you! You've successfully subscribed to newsletters!
What do you think ?
Apatheist Account2 4 days ago
Anyone who traps someone else into having a child is not playing with a full deck. It's a lifelong commitment that you should only do if you BOTH want to; if one doesn't, then you have to decide between the partner or the child.
LH25 4 days ago
People need to stop marrying people hoping they will change, esp. on big issues like having kids.
BeesEelsAndPups 3 days ago
THIS!!! The relationship was already incompatible. One desperately wanted a lifestyle the other desperately wanted to avoid. Even if they had children, this would have eventually led to a divorce. Except now there would have been a child in the picture. The sister is in her 20s. That's plenty of time to find somebody who WANTS to have children with her.
Load More Replies... The Other Guest 4 days ago
Kids vs no kids isn't something one can compromise on, and if a couple aren't in agreement on it then they shouldn't marry each other. Getting married anyway and expecting the other person to change their mind is ridiculous. Sabotaging birth control in order to get your way when the non-kids person *doesn't* change their mind is criminal.
Abby Gould 4 days ago
I was coming down here to say that. I'm guessing he let her know he didn't want kids before they married. SO WHY DID SHE MARRY HIM!?
Load More Replies...
Janelle Collard 4 days ago
If that's the kind of family OP has, she's better off going NC with all of them. Baby-trapping *anybody* is illegal in a lot of places.
TribbleThinking 4 days ago (edited)
By telling the OP and expecting her to keep quiet, the sister was making her an unwilling co-conspirator. She had no right to do that, in the same way she had no right to force her husband to be an unwilling father. But OP and husband noped out. Sister was outraged. The family is opting to reward the scheming lying sibling and penalising the one who refused to be roped into scheming and lying.
Stacy Bender 4 days ago
It always amazes me how many people say, they'll change their minds after marriage. Effing dumb asses.
Secret Squirrel 4 days ago
Disgusting doesn't begin to cover it. Report her. Even if nothing else happens, the divorce will be easier. If you don't, it's no different to a man who knows his friend SA-ed someone and the only reaction is a scolding.
FreeTheUnicorn 4 days ago
Take the opportunity to get away from what is clearly a horrible family. What she did is reprehensible and illegal. Her mother defending it is just as bad. It's no different to stealthing and cheering that on. No matter what support OP thinks she's getting from the family, people who think that what she did is ok are detrimental in other ways. Keep your kid away, get away.
Mark Childers 4 days ago
I don't like kids. I'm uncomfortable around them and have no experience being with them. I've known this most of my life, which is one of many reasons why I knew I would never get married. People can change their minds, and I don't want to have to get a divorce because of it. I haven't regretted it at all. I've always been comfortable in my own company and enjoy living alone. What this woman did was wrong. She went into the marriage under false pretenses, and it was completely unfair to her husband.
Beak Hookage 4 days ago
Knowing about the extremely sick and cruel thing her sister was doing and NOT speaking out would have made this woman the AH. And how disgusting that the sister subsequently abused her... for being a mother?! What the hell kind of sense does that make? And really, if this disgusting little scheme of hers had worked and she "accidentally" got pregnant and insisted on keeping it, I wouldn't be surprised if poor Toby would have divorced her anyway.
Lousha 3 days ago
I am the result of such deceit. It was on a lighter scale and with a much less disgusting method, but still. My parents had 2 boys that they both enthusiastically wanted, but at that point dad thought that was enough, it made sense financially to stop at two. Mom really wanted a girl, so she stopped taking her pills but said she was still taking them. I say lighter beause dad adores children, and would've had a million if he could afford them. He was happy about the news of the third pregnancy, if worried about money. Loved me from the first moment. But as far as I know he never learned that I was not an accident. Mom told me this when I was in my late teens, as if she was somewhat proud of it. I could never look at her the same. So yeah, taking away someone's decision in the first place is awful, but whenever I hear about this "condom method" my stomach atcually churns. How desperate, how devoid of shame do you have to be, how vile to be able to even consider doing this?
Lousha 3 days ago
Just imagine 20 years on, and this woman telling her kid that she fished them out of the bin and... Just... Major eeeeeewwwww...
Load More Replies...
Sarah Matsoukis 3 days ago
You can't trap people with a kid, they will either leave or everyone in the house will be miserable.
Dusty's mom 3 days ago
My Hubs wanted kids, so I asked him to wait a year before we tried. During that time his pals were becoming dads, and he didn't like how their kids changed them. He told me nothing about this, and when I said I was ready, he told me he changed his mind. I was really PO'd that he didn't share anything with me, but I respected his change of heart and we're childless. In the end, it was a good decision. Kids really do change friendships, and as much as I love Hubs, he's not good dad material.
Nimitz 3 days ago
The OP is right, this is just another form of one partner poking holes in a condom. She's a surprisingly good sister-in-law, and an almost reasonable human being. A good person person would realize this is the equivalent of a criminal describing a conspiracy. the night before a heist I hope the guy managed to run far and fast and sever all contact with that goddamn sociopath.
Tyke 3 days ago
She went behind her sisters back and betrayed her trust. Of course her sister doesn't like her. However, her sister was morally wrong, deceitful and ruined her own marriage - often "i don't want kids" means just that and it should be respected. Sadly, doing the right thing doesn't equate to being liked.
on second thought.... 4 days ago
That marriage would have ended anyway as soon as the sister's deceit came to light, which it would have as an "I told you so". Thank goodness that this way a child doesn't have to grow up without a father.
Doodles1983 3 days ago
Wow. "Nice family". Sister is wrong. Minds can be changed. With discussion. Not force. Divorce is more linked to deception with is her fault for trying to subvertly get pregnant. OP needs a better family.
Shannon Donnelly 4 days ago
I believe she meant to write “blew my concern off” and autocorrect changed it on her
Load More Replies... 
Uncle Schmickle 2 days ago
She must be desperate to have a child to use this manipulative and underhand method. Men are often just a bank balance and a sperm donor. The woman thinks she has the God - given right to have a baby. In other words, it's "all about me". What about all the poor orphans who desperately need a loving home ?
ADDchallengedINFP-T 2 days ago
OP, not your fault, your sister did it herself. Family has to see it, otherwise everyone else is an AH. Not BIL, your husband and yourself. There is no crystal ball telling if BIL would change if they got pregnant. He just does not want kids.
Dre Mosley 2 days ago
NTA, and the whole family siding with the sister and shunning you is absolutely insane. If a person states from the jump that they don't want kids, don't think that you're gonna convince them to change their mind, and you certainly don't do. . .this. WTF?
Apatheist Account2 4 days ago
Anyone who traps someone else into having a child is not playing with a full deck. It's a lifelong commitment that you should only do if you BOTH want to; if one doesn't, then you have to decide between the partner or the child.
LH25 4 days ago
People need to stop marrying people hoping they will change, esp. on big issues like having kids.
BeesEelsAndPups 3 days ago
THIS!!! The relationship was already incompatible. One desperately wanted a lifestyle the other desperately wanted to avoid. Even if they had children, this would have eventually led to a divorce. Except now there would have been a child in the picture. The sister is in her 20s. That's plenty of time to find somebody who WANTS to have children with her.
Load More Replies... The Other Guest 4 days ago
Kids vs no kids isn't something one can compromise on, and if a couple aren't in agreement on it then they shouldn't marry each other. Getting married anyway and expecting the other person to change their mind is ridiculous. Sabotaging birth control in order to get your way when the non-kids person *doesn't* change their mind is criminal.
Abby Gould 4 days ago
I was coming down here to say that. I'm guessing he let her know he didn't want kids before they married. SO WHY DID SHE MARRY HIM!?
Load More Replies... Janelle Collard 4 days ago
If that's the kind of family OP has, she's better off going NC with all of them. Baby-trapping *anybody* is illegal in a lot of places.
TribbleThinking 4 days ago (edited)
By telling the OP and expecting her to keep quiet, the sister was making her an unwilling co-conspirator. She had no right to do that, in the same way she had no right to force her husband to be an unwilling father. But OP and husband noped out. Sister was outraged. The family is opting to reward the scheming lying sibling and penalising the one who refused to be roped into scheming and lying.
Stacy Bender 4 days ago
It always amazes me how many people say, they'll change their minds after marriage. Effing dumb asses.
Secret Squirrel 4 days ago
Disgusting doesn't begin to cover it. Report her. Even if nothing else happens, the divorce will be easier. If you don't, it's no different to a man who knows his friend SA-ed someone and the only reaction is a scolding.
FreeTheUnicorn 4 days ago
Take the opportunity to get away from what is clearly a horrible family. What she did is reprehensible and illegal. Her mother defending it is just as bad. It's no different to stealthing and cheering that on. No matter what support OP thinks she's getting from the family, people who think that what she did is ok are detrimental in other ways. Keep your kid away, get away.
Mark Childers 4 days ago
I don't like kids. I'm uncomfortable around them and have no experience being with them. I've known this most of my life, which is one of many reasons why I knew I would never get married. People can change their minds, and I don't want to have to get a divorce because of it. I haven't regretted it at all. I've always been comfortable in my own company and enjoy living alone. What this woman did was wrong. She went into the marriage under false pretenses, and it was completely unfair to her husband.
Beak Hookage 4 days ago
Knowing about the extremely sick and cruel thing her sister was doing and NOT speaking out would have made this woman the AH. And how disgusting that the sister subsequently abused her... for being a mother?! What the hell kind of sense does that make? And really, if this disgusting little scheme of hers had worked and she "accidentally" got pregnant and insisted on keeping it, I wouldn't be surprised if poor Toby would have divorced her anyway.
Lousha 3 days ago
I am the result of such deceit. It was on a lighter scale and with a much less disgusting method, but still. My parents had 2 boys that they both enthusiastically wanted, but at that point dad thought that was enough, it made sense financially to stop at two. Mom really wanted a girl, so she stopped taking her pills but said she was still taking them. I say lighter beause dad adores children, and would've had a million if he could afford them. He was happy about the news of the third pregnancy, if worried about money. Loved me from the first moment. But as far as I know he never learned that I was not an accident. Mom told me this when I was in my late teens, as if she was somewhat proud of it. I could never look at her the same. So yeah, taking away someone's decision in the first place is awful, but whenever I hear about this "condom method" my stomach atcually churns. How desperate, how devoid of shame do you have to be, how vile to be able to even consider doing this?
Lousha 3 days ago
Just imagine 20 years on, and this woman telling her kid that she fished them out of the bin and... Just... Major eeeeeewwwww...
Load More Replies... Sarah Matsoukis 3 days ago
You can't trap people with a kid, they will either leave or everyone in the house will be miserable.
Dusty's mom 3 days ago
My Hubs wanted kids, so I asked him to wait a year before we tried. During that time his pals were becoming dads, and he didn't like how their kids changed them. He told me nothing about this, and when I said I was ready, he told me he changed his mind. I was really PO'd that he didn't share anything with me, but I respected his change of heart and we're childless. In the end, it was a good decision. Kids really do change friendships, and as much as I love Hubs, he's not good dad material.
Nimitz 3 days ago
The OP is right, this is just another form of one partner poking holes in a condom. She's a surprisingly good sister-in-law, and an almost reasonable human being. A good person person would realize this is the equivalent of a criminal describing a conspiracy. the night before a heist I hope the guy managed to run far and fast and sever all contact with that goddamn sociopath.
Tyke 3 days ago
She went behind her sisters back and betrayed her trust. Of course her sister doesn't like her. However, her sister was morally wrong, deceitful and ruined her own marriage - often "i don't want kids" means just that and it should be respected. Sadly, doing the right thing doesn't equate to being liked.
on second thought.... 4 days ago
That marriage would have ended anyway as soon as the sister's deceit came to light, which it would have as an "I told you so". Thank goodness that this way a child doesn't have to grow up without a father.
Doodles1983 3 days ago
Wow. "Nice family". Sister is wrong. Minds can be changed. With discussion. Not force. Divorce is more linked to deception with is her fault for trying to subvertly get pregnant. OP needs a better family.
Shannon Donnelly 4 days ago
I believe she meant to write “blew my concern off” and autocorrect changed it on her
Load More Replies... Uncle Schmickle 2 days ago
She must be desperate to have a child to use this manipulative and underhand method. Men are often just a bank balance and a sperm donor. The woman thinks she has the God - given right to have a baby. In other words, it's "all about me". What about all the poor orphans who desperately need a loving home ?
ADDchallengedINFP-T 2 days ago
OP, not your fault, your sister did it herself. Family has to see it, otherwise everyone else is an AH. Not BIL, your husband and yourself. There is no crystal ball telling if BIL would change if they got pregnant. He just does not want kids.
Dre Mosley 2 days ago
NTA, and the whole family siding with the sister and shunning you is absolutely insane. If a person states from the jump that they don't want kids, don't think that you're gonna convince them to change their mind, and you certainly don't do. . .this. WTF?
You May Like Woman Asks If She’d Be Wrong Not To Attend A Baby Shower If There’s No Proof Of Baby’s Existence “This Isn’t The Woman I Married”: Man Ready To Leave Wife After She Ruins Daughter’s Wedding A Man’s Ex-Wife Would Not Leave Him Alone, So He Decided To Get Revenge In A Hilarious Way
Gabija Palšytė
Viktorija Ošikaitė
Gabija Palšytė
Related on Bored Panda
39
39