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Family Divided After Mom Tells Pregnant Daughter She And Her Husband Will Not Raise The Baby
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Family Divided After Mom Tells Pregnant Daughter She And Her Husband Will Not Raise The Baby

Mom Who Is Raising Her Daughter’s Child Learns She’s Pregnant And Expects Her To Raise This One Too, Tells Her Off In Front Of The Whole FamilyPregnant Woman Expects Her Parents To Raise Her New Baby Just Like They've Raised The First One But They Refuse, Drama EnsuesFamily Divided After Mom Tells Pregnant Daughter She And Her Husband Will Not Raise The Baby56-Year-Old Woman Refuses To Raise Her Daughter's Next Child, Asks If She's WrongMom Doesn't Help Her Parents Raise Her Baby She Had At 17, Now She's Mad They Won't Help Raise Her New BabyMom Who Is Raising Her Daughter's Child Learns She's Pregnant And Expects Her To Raise This One Too, Tells Her A Firm Mother Asks If She Was A Jerk For Telling Her Pregnant Daughter She Will Have Nothing To Do With Her New BabyPregnant Woman Has The Audacity To Expect Her Mom And Dad Will Raise The Baby Because They Already Adopted Her First Child She Had As A TeenMom Who Is Raising Her Daughter's Child Learns She's Pregnant And Expects Her To Raise This One Too, Tells Her A Firm Grandparents Raised Their Daughter's Child, Refuse To Raise Another When She Announces She's Pregnant Again
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Your parents won’t always be there for you. At some point, you just have to take responsibility for yourself. But one woman still hasn’t figured this out—despite being in her 30s.

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Last week, Reddit user BadGrandmother submitted a post to the popular ‘Am I the [Jerk]?‘ community, asking its members to share their take on a recent conflict the woman had with her pregnant daughter.

It basically revolves around the two of them disagreeing on who should raise the baby, but that’s me oversimplifying the situation; everything’s much more nuanced. So continue scrolling to read what happened and give your take in the comments.

A woman expected her mom and dad to spend their retirement raising her child

Image credits: cottonbro (not the actual photo)

But they refused to do it and now the whole family is torn apart



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Image credits: cottonbro (not the actual photo)

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Image credits: Anastasiia Chepinska (not the actual photo)


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More grandparents than ever are being put in a position like Kelly’s folks, becoming full-time parents again, often with fewer resources and more health problems than they had the first time around. Or in this particular case, the second.

The arrangement is not new, of course—people raised by grandparents for at least part of their childhood include Maya Angelou, Carol Burnett, and two former presidents, Bill Clinton, and Barack Obama, but nowadays it’s simply more common than ever.

The proportion of children living in grandfamilies has doubled in the U.S. since 1970—an increase some experts attribute to the opioid crisis.

About 3 percent of American children live apart from their parents, and of those, nearly two-thirds are being raised by grandparents.

Some 2.6 million grandparents are raising their grandchildren, either because of a temporary change in circumstance for the parents, such as military deployment or joblessness, or something more lasting and terrible, including mental illness, divorce, incarceration, and substance abuse.

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Kelly thinks it’s no big deal, but raising grandchildren can take a huge toll on grandparents: higher-than-normal rates of depression, sleeplessness, emotional problems, and chronic health problems like hypertension and diabetes; feelings of exhaustion, loneliness, and isolation; a sense of having too little privacy, and too little time to spend with their spouses, friends, and other family members. Not a bouquet you’d like to receive at the later stages of your life.

Reportedly, there’s a disproportionately high rate of poverty among grandparents raising grandchildren, and more than 40 percent report having economic or social-service needs—for themselves or, more often, their grandchildren—that are unmet.

I don’t know about you, but I think there’s no question that Kelly is the one who is being totally unreasonable here.

Here’s the discussion that followed the confession



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Kotryna Br

Kotryna Br

Author, BoredPanda staff

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Kotryna is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Graphic Design. Before Bored Panda, she worked as a freelance graphic designer and illiustrator. When not editing, she enjoys working with clay, drawing, playing board games and drinking good tea.

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Kotryna Br

Kotryna Br

Author, BoredPanda staff

Kotryna is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Graphic Design. Before Bored Panda, she worked as a freelance graphic designer and illiustrator. When not editing, she enjoys working with clay, drawing, playing board games and drinking good tea.

Rokas Laurinavičius

Rokas Laurinavičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

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Rokas Laurinavičius

Rokas Laurinavičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

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Mary Rogers
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Since this woman brought up such an unreasonable expectation at a public occasion, then I see no reason why the grandparents could not also respond at that point. Had it merely been hinting that she might want her parents to raise the child, as it appeared to be in the first description, then I would have waited to discuss it privately. Basically this woman has no shame, she brought the embarrassment on herself by making her expectations known publicly. I do feel sorry for the granddaughter, who was caught in the middle of all of this.

Kayla J
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am so horribly confused by Kelly's brain. She seems to be so excited about the birth announcement but also doesn't seem to even plan on raising the child at all. It's like she feels she is gifting her parents another child when they didn't even ask for one?

Mary Rogers
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I suspect the "excitement" is for show. What she really wanted was to put her parents on the spot where they would have to publicly commit to raising the child, or risk looking bad. Of course, she only made herself look bad instead.

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Jane Thorne-Gutierrez
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow. Their daughter is a mess. So glad their granddaughter is not, thanks to them. They did and said the same as I would have. I think if they do have the baby, I would contact child protective services because they are completely irresponsible and if they keep that child, it will be a tragedy waiting to happen. The less contact with them, the better for all concerned.

Night Owl
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would contact child protective services too. They should at least keep an eye on the family if Kelly decides to have the child and then decides to not put it up for adoption

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Mary Rogers
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Since this woman brought up such an unreasonable expectation at a public occasion, then I see no reason why the grandparents could not also respond at that point. Had it merely been hinting that she might want her parents to raise the child, as it appeared to be in the first description, then I would have waited to discuss it privately. Basically this woman has no shame, she brought the embarrassment on herself by making her expectations known publicly. I do feel sorry for the granddaughter, who was caught in the middle of all of this.

Kayla J
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am so horribly confused by Kelly's brain. She seems to be so excited about the birth announcement but also doesn't seem to even plan on raising the child at all. It's like she feels she is gifting her parents another child when they didn't even ask for one?

Mary Rogers
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I suspect the "excitement" is for show. What she really wanted was to put her parents on the spot where they would have to publicly commit to raising the child, or risk looking bad. Of course, she only made herself look bad instead.

Load More Replies...
Jane Thorne-Gutierrez
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow. Their daughter is a mess. So glad their granddaughter is not, thanks to them. They did and said the same as I would have. I think if they do have the baby, I would contact child protective services because they are completely irresponsible and if they keep that child, it will be a tragedy waiting to happen. The less contact with them, the better for all concerned.

Night Owl
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would contact child protective services too. They should at least keep an eye on the family if Kelly decides to have the child and then decides to not put it up for adoption

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