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Parents Demand Daughter Plan Her Wedding Around Brothers’ Needs, Get Uninvited And Blocked
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Parents Demand Daughter Plan Her Wedding Around Brothers’ Needs, Get Uninvited And Blocked

Parents Demand Daughter Plan Her Wedding Around Brothers’ Needs, Get Uninvited And BlockedFamily Drama Ensues After Woman Gives Her Parents The Same Treatment They Gave Her Growing UpParents Treat Daughter As “Unwanted Girl Child”, Are Shocked She Doesn’t Want Them At Her WeddingWoman Gives Entitled Parents A Taste Of Their Own Medicine By Not Inviting Them To Her WeddingGirl Called “Selfish” For Wanting Her Needs Met, Gets Revenge On Parents Years Later“Am I Wrong for Throwing a Line my Parents Always Used to Use On Me Back In Their Faces?”Bride-To-Be Has Enough Of Parents Treating Her As “Unwanted Girl Child”, Draws The LineParents Freak Out Over Not Being Welcome At Their Daughter's Wedding, She Has No Regrets“You’re Just Being Selfish”: Woman Makes Parents Cry By Mirroring The Way They Treated Her“Boss Move”: Internet Comes Through For This Bride-To-Be After She Refuses To Invite Her Family
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Whether it’s a grand ball or a more intimate celebration, a wedding is a significant moment in a couple’s relationship; that’s why they often want to share it with those closest to them.

Some soon-to-be-wed can’t imagine it without their siblings, best friends, or family members, no matter how close or distant they are; but this redditor chose not to invite her immediate family and gave them a taste of their own meds when she said why. Find the full story below.

RELATED:

    Some people would rather not see their family members at their wedding

    Image credits: Ksenia Chernaya (not the actual photo)

    This woman decided not to invite her immediate family to her wedding because of how they treated her growing up

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    Image credits:  Ivan Samkov (not the actual photo)

    Image credits: Kindel Media (not the actual photo)

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    Image credits: Alena Darmel (not the actual photo)

    Image credits: TAAmIWrongHere

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    Image credits: Agung Pandit Wiguna (not the actual photo)

    At the end of the day, it’s up to the happy couple who gets to participate in their special day

    Coming up with a wedding guest list can be a headache for oh, so many reasons; from limitations of the venue or the budget, to family politics or wondering how inviting or not inviting children might affect the big day—all of these and many more things have to be carefully considered. But it’s something the happy couple has to deal with—unless, of course, they decide to elope, which more than 60% of engaged couples consider—if they want to celebrate their special day with all the right people.

    Considering that they’re the reason for the celebration, the wedding should be all about the happy couple, which is why the final decision about who gets to participate should also be theirs. As the professional wedding planner Jove Meyer told BRIDES Magazine, “Weddings are not a show, they are not a performance, <…> They are a celebration of your love, and only those you love and are close to should be included.”

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    Meyer also added that the soon-to-be-wed should never invite someone to their ceremony out of obligation. That’s important to remember when it comes to parents or siblings, who are typically invited to the wedding. However, blood ties don’t always ensure a close relationship, and it’s pretty safe to assume one wouldn’t invite someone they don’t have a relationship with, if they followed the not-doing-things-out-of-obligation rule.

    Even though it’s difficult to determine what constitutes “typical” when it comes to weddings, it’s possible to at least get an average of things; and according to The Knot’s 2022 survey, that year, 117 guests was the average wedding size. Their data also revealed that inviting over a hundred people to share the joy with is not uncommon, as more than half of the happy couples (52%) do. Out of the rest, 35% try to keep their guest list between 50 and 100 names long, and 14% invite up to 50 people.

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    Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)

    Some people decide to cut ties with their family members altogether, when relationships go south

    No matter the size of the guest list, if the soon-to-be-married don’t feel like inviting their family members, they shouldn’t; especially when the relationship is far from perfect. When things go south, some people even decide to cut ties with their kin, which, in some cases, might be the right thing to do.

    Verywell Health pointed out that according to 2015 studies, four-in-five individuals who have cut ties with certain family members have seen a change for the better, including feeling stronger, more free and independent. Another study reportedly revealed that roughly 40% of people have experienced family estrangement at some point in their lives.

    Therapist and training provider Claire Jack, Ph.D., suggested that family estrangement is often followed by sadness or feelings of guilt. “The sadness, grief, and guilt are, however, often accompanied by a sense of relief and a wonder at how life can be when you’re no longer caught up in the spider’s web of a toxic family,” she pointed out for Psychology Today.

    Dr. Jack explained that one of the reasons behind such guilt is the fact that cutting off family is often seen as taboo. “People who do so are often labeled as ‘bad’ or selfish and to many outsiders, the emotional abuse is so hidden within the family that friends and other relations just can’t see why you would need to distance yourself in this way.”

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    In the OP’s case, it’s unclear whether outsiders knew about the way she felt about her family members, or about the preferential treatment the parents gave to her brothers. However, other relatives were seemingly supportive of the OP and her wanting the wedding to be about her rather than her family members; people in the comments shared the same sentiment and wished the redditor a happy married life.

    Fellow redditors were supportive of the OP, they shared their thoughts in the comments

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    Miglė Miliūtė

    Miglė Miliūtė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

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    A writer here at Bored Panda, I am a lover of good music, good food, and good company, which makes food-related topics and feel-good stories my favorite ones to cover. Passionate about traveling and concerts, I constantly seek occasions to visit places yet personally unexplored. I also enjoy spending free time outdoors, trying out different sports—even if I don’t look too graceful at it—or socializing over a cup of coffee.

    Read less »
    Miglė Miliūtė

    Miglė Miliūtė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    A writer here at Bored Panda, I am a lover of good music, good food, and good company, which makes food-related topics and feel-good stories my favorite ones to cover. Passionate about traveling and concerts, I constantly seek occasions to visit places yet personally unexplored. I also enjoy spending free time outdoors, trying out different sports—even if I don’t look too graceful at it—or socializing over a cup of coffee.

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

    Read less »

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Indrė Lukošiūtė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I am a Visual editor at Bored Panda, I'm determined to find the most interesting and the best quality images for each post that I do. On my free time I like to unwind by doing some yoga, watching all kinds of movies/tv shows, playing video and board games or just simply hanging out with my cat

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    Rens
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's your wedding it's your day it has nothing to do with anybody else and certain nothing to do with your parents and their spoiled man-baby sons. I was the oldest, from my mom's first marriage; I was always forgotten and ignored, and suffered emotional neglect as a child. Both my brothers were given cars when they were 18; parents paid for their tertiary education (I got a job and my employer paid for my tertiary education) Even to this day, she still worships her boys who can do absolutely no wrong. The irony is, both of them had juvenile criminal records and yet I was the black sheep of the family! I left home at 17 and never looked back.

    Vinnie
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This hit me: "I was the unwanted girl child in the middle". Happened to a former friend of mine - the lone girl and eldest, treated quite differently from her brothers - and not well. Then came the sarcastic thought: "Oh yes, your siblings have special needs - they're handicapped by having different gonads." Seriously, I've met parents who didn't treat boys as "special". And the boys and girls are the better for it.

    Load More Replies...
    Anna Nowak
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omfg the thing about "can't be too affectionate beceause your brothers could fantasize about you and your wife" is completely f*cked up

    Nice Beast Ludo
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So sick and perverted to say such a thing. My mother used to tell me not to wear tank tops around my uncles because they will have sexual fantasies about me. Their niece. Age 14. Really effed me up and my uncles were never creepy like that. She was the pervert

    Load More Replies...
    Alexandra
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please be prepared for the time when your parents are ageing and might need some help. I don't think they're above trying to guilt you into being their carer rather than their sons.

    Barrygirl1943
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yep - that mentality usually extends to it’s the girl’s responsibility. Especially of the golden boys haven’t accomplished anything

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
    Rens
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's your wedding it's your day it has nothing to do with anybody else and certain nothing to do with your parents and their spoiled man-baby sons. I was the oldest, from my mom's first marriage; I was always forgotten and ignored, and suffered emotional neglect as a child. Both my brothers were given cars when they were 18; parents paid for their tertiary education (I got a job and my employer paid for my tertiary education) Even to this day, she still worships her boys who can do absolutely no wrong. The irony is, both of them had juvenile criminal records and yet I was the black sheep of the family! I left home at 17 and never looked back.

    Vinnie
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This hit me: "I was the unwanted girl child in the middle". Happened to a former friend of mine - the lone girl and eldest, treated quite differently from her brothers - and not well. Then came the sarcastic thought: "Oh yes, your siblings have special needs - they're handicapped by having different gonads." Seriously, I've met parents who didn't treat boys as "special". And the boys and girls are the better for it.

    Load More Replies...
    Anna Nowak
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omfg the thing about "can't be too affectionate beceause your brothers could fantasize about you and your wife" is completely f*cked up

    Nice Beast Ludo
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So sick and perverted to say such a thing. My mother used to tell me not to wear tank tops around my uncles because they will have sexual fantasies about me. Their niece. Age 14. Really effed me up and my uncles were never creepy like that. She was the pervert

    Load More Replies...
    Alexandra
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please be prepared for the time when your parents are ageing and might need some help. I don't think they're above trying to guilt you into being their carer rather than their sons.

    Barrygirl1943
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yep - that mentality usually extends to it’s the girl’s responsibility. Especially of the golden boys haven’t accomplished anything

    Load More Replies...
    Load More Comments
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