Traveler Plans Japan Trip, Then Friends Add Strangers, They Cancel And Wonder If They’re The Jerk
If there’s one thing we’ve all learned from life, it’s that too many cooks spoil the broth. Now imagine those cooks are your friends, and the broth is your dream trip somewhere wonderful.
For one netizen, an exciting trip to Japan and South Korea with three high school friends went sideways when unexpected additions nearly doubled the group’s size. This forced the Original Poster (OP) to make a bold and controversial decision: to bow out of the trip altogether.
More info: Reddit
When too many people get involved in planning a trip, what was once exciting can quickly turn into something really stressful
Image credits: Torsten Dettlaff / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The author had a trip planned with friends and learned that an acquaintance was joining in for a few activities, but they were fine with it
Image credits: aliarai
Image credits: Diva Plavalaguna / Pexels (not the actual photo)
They would later find out that three additional people would be added to the trip, making the initial trip of four become a trip of eight
Image credits: aliarai
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The author was uncomfortable with the added strangers, and organizing the trip with everyone became chaotic
Image credits: aliarai
They got a refund on their ticket and withdrew from the trip, leaving their friends surprised and upset
The original plan was quite simple: the OP had envisioned a trip to South Korea and Japan with three of their close friends. With tickets booked and planning underway, it seemed like the perfect getaway and the OP was eagerly looking forward to exploring.
One friend mentioned that a friend who the OP wasn’t familiar with might join them for a few activities in Japan, but it wasn’t a big deal. The person had their own itinerary, and it wouldn’t affect the core dynamic of the group.
However, things took an unexpected turn and got a bit more interesting when two of the OP’s friends were invited to join the trip. Suddenly, a group trip for four swelled to seven— potentially eight—and what was once an intimate plan now felt chaotic.
For the OP, the change was unsettling. Traveling in a large group— especially with people you’ve never met— came with its challenges. Will everyone get along? And what about the aspects like room-sharing, splitting bills, or navigating public transportation?
A group call meant to iron out the details only added to the OP’s anxiety. There were too many opinions, too many voices. Rather than risk a stressful and expensive trip, the OP made the tough call to withdraw, refunding their ticket and wishing the group well.
This decision left friends shocked and upset. However, the OP’s choice wasn’t about the newcomers— it was about protecting their own peace of mind. Traveling thousands of miles and spending a fortune with strangers felt like too big a gamble.
Image credits: Freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Traveling is one of the most rewarding experiences one can have, and traveling in a group can be a great way to share experiences, split costs, and have an added layer of security. However, there are challenges that come with traveling with a big group, let alone with a few strangers.
According to the Travel Pocket Guide, large groups may mean less flexibility, a clash of preferences, and a likelihood of personality conflicts. Decision-making will become increasingly complex as more opinions are added to the equation, and the mere act of trying to coordinate everyone’s schedules can sometimes feel like herding cats.
Moreover, the Stride Creative Group explored the science of familiarity, and they report that decades of research have shown that familiarity is a powerful driver of human behavior. People are naturally drawn to and feel more at ease with, those they know and trust.
Building on this understanding, the presence of strangers in a travel group can therefore become a potentially discomforting and uneasy situation. Christina Jane, a travel blogger, offers valuable tips for navigating trips, especially when traveling in a group.
“Trust your intuition. Do not be willing to go on a trip with just anyone,” she wrote on her website. She also emphasized ensuring everyone is on the same page. Finally, she advised being prepared to go your own way if things don’t work out.
Netizens were overwhelmingly in support of the traveler’s decision to cancel the trip, with many agreeing that adding strangers without prior consent was disrespectful.
Others validated the discomfort of traveling with strangers, suggesting that the OP save their money for a more enjoyable trip later.
Would you have gone on the trip anyway or made the same decision to back out? We’d love to hear your take on this—share your thoughts below!
The general sentiment from netizens was clear: the decision to bow out was the right one, and the friends’ actions were unfair
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
Who just invites people on a trip without a thought to the others involved, so rude. My husband and I trying to decide on a place to eat can be an ordeal, let alone a bunch of strangers. Sounds like a nightmare
Hell, I struggle with JustEat by myself, never mind a restaurant 😆
Load More Replies...NTA! Complete change in group dynamics when its doubled and you don't know half the people. That's a whole different trip. I wouldn't like it either.
Who just invites people on a trip without a thought to the others involved, so rude. My husband and I trying to decide on a place to eat can be an ordeal, let alone a bunch of strangers. Sounds like a nightmare
Hell, I struggle with JustEat by myself, never mind a restaurant 😆
Load More Replies...NTA! Complete change in group dynamics when its doubled and you don't know half the people. That's a whole different trip. I wouldn't like it either.
34
19