“Why Don’t YOU Handle Them?”: Mom Fails To Control Her Kids, Regrets It When Security Shows Up
Interview With AuthorKids are still getting to know the world, so it’s natural that they’re curious. But when that curiosity turns into borderline vandalism, it might be time for their parents to step in and take control. If the parent fails to do so, it’s not uncommon that fed-up strangers may start doing the disciplining for them.
When something similar happened in this story, the entitled mother reacted less than pleasantly. The OP, a 17-year-old daughter who witnessed this altercation, shared it on the Malicious Compliance subreddit. Where was the compliance? The entitled mom told OP’s mother to handle the kids herself if they’re so bothersome and then pulled a surprised Pikachu face when she complied.
Bored Panda got in touch with the Redditor who posted this story, u/Scared_Fruit8486. She was kind enough to have a short chat with us and give us more context about the altercation. Read our conversation with her below!
Children are naturally curious, so they will try to touch and play with things in public places
Image credits: ebelodedova / envanto (not the actual photo)
But it’s the parent’s job to discipline them when they go overboard, something the mother in this story failed to do, so a stranger had to intervene
Image credits: ClaireLuci / envanto (not the actual photo)
Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages / envanto (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Scared_Fruit8486
The OP told Bored Panda that her mother didn’t usually resort to disciplining others’ kids
Image credits: Gustavo Fring / pexels (not the actual photo)
The OP tells Bored Panda she decided to post her story after reading lots of similar stories on the r/EntitledParents subreddit. “I low-key wished I had an entitled parent moment of my own to share. When this happened, I knew I just had to post it on Reddit,” the OP says.
First, she went to the Entitled Parents subreddit, and the post currently is still there. The upvote count is totally different, though: while the post on r/MaliciousCompliance has over 4.5k upvotes, the one on r/EntitledParents has only a little over 300. So when someone pointed out to the OP that her story also counts as malicious compliance, she decided to post it there as well.
We were curious to know more details about the situation. The OP’s mother did a good job letting the security know the products were being damaged in the store. But some people in the comments were wondering where the store clerk was at the time.
“There was just the lone cashier in the store at the time,” u/Scared_Fruit8486 tells us. “It was a really slow hour for them, I guess. Even the manager wasn’t available then. The cash till was located near the door while the lipstick testers were on the farther side of the store.”
“I do remember the cashier watching the kids messing up the testers, and I guess he didn’t interfere because a) he thinks he isn’t paid enough to handle these things and b) he didn’t want to get yelled at by the Entitled Mother.”
The Redditor says that her mom doesn’t always take it upon herself to discipline someone else’s kids. “I don’t really recall any situations where my mom acted this way with other people’s kids. With her own four children, she’s done this plenty of times.”
“I’m older now, so she’s not that big on these things, but she’ll always let us know when we’re wrong and where we need to be corrected. A true veteran parent!”
You should only correct the behavior of someone else’s child if there’s imminent danger to people or property
Image credits: Monstera Production / pexels (not the actual photo)
The OP’s mom in this story didn’t actually discipline someone else’s kid. She didn’t even interact with the children directly. She simply let the security of the shopping mall know that these kids were making a mess at the beauty store. And the Entitled Mother was the one who told her to take action if she was so bothered.
But is it generally okay to discipline someone else’s child in a public space? Robin McClure writes for VeryWell Family that in the instances where the kid is damaging property, hurting a pet, or putting other children at risk, other adults intervening is understandable.
Many experts agree that the first step should be to talk to the child’s parent. Parenting expert and author Dr. Justin Coulson suggests saying something like the following: “I’m sorry to bother you. It seems that your child is a little upset. He/she has been hurting some of the kids in the playground. I thought I should just come over and let you know.”
Naturally, physical discipline is always out of the question – always remain calm in such situations. If the parent refuses to discipline their child, McClure suggests trying to distract or redirect the kid.
“But, for the most part, it’s best to avoid using disciplinary actions against another person’s child,” McClure concludes. All in all, another parent or person should intervene only where there is danger or something is getting damaged.
For every other situation, it’s the parent’s job to decide how and when to discipline their children. The OP summarized the whole situation quite well herself: “Sure, kids will be kids, but parents better be parents and have basic common sense.”
Commenters shared their stories with unruly kids, and the OP reacted to most of them
Most commenters praised the way OP’s mother handled the situation and congratulated her for having such a cool mom
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And these people are the reason why so many don't tolerate kids in public places anymore. Thanks a lot. I'm not a strict parent, but even my 2 year old behaves herself in restaurants, doctor's offices, shops and the like - without having to let her watch videos all the time (I don't condemn video watching though, if you have an easily bored and temperamental toddler you do what you can).
I grew up at a time when (and in a place where) the maxim "it takes a village to raise a child" held true. If you mis-behaved in public and a neighbor witnessed such, depending on the situation a couple of things could happen; either you were publicly admonished and reprimanded by the observer and/or your mother was waiting at home for you, and you REALLY did NOT want that to happen! The one-sided discussion could go something like this: "What were you doing with.....? Who gave you permission? Why did Miss Mary (or Myrtle or Mildred et al) have to correct your behavior? You brought shame on our family....." By the same token, if you were in danger, you could be assured that someone would rush to your aid! Grown ups just made sure that ALL community kids were protected and they made sure that ALL community kids behaved as if they were properly brought up, NOT dragged up! It takes a village......pity that it appears that we forgot about that.
Load More Replies...I think we can all see who the OP's mother was parenting, and it wasn't the kids.
I totally understand a kid having an emotional breakdown in public, or having little emotional control (as developmentally age appropriate) but damaging property is totally unacceptable. I've been reading that a lot of makeup stores like Sephora have been having a major problem with this.
I was with my daughter in a store once when there was a child throwing a tantrum, and the child was old enough to know better. She asked me if she had ever done that. I told her I didn't think so, but if she had I was pretty sure it didn't happen a second time.
Load More Replies...And these people are the reason why so many don't tolerate kids in public places anymore. Thanks a lot. I'm not a strict parent, but even my 2 year old behaves herself in restaurants, doctor's offices, shops and the like - without having to let her watch videos all the time (I don't condemn video watching though, if you have an easily bored and temperamental toddler you do what you can).
I grew up at a time when (and in a place where) the maxim "it takes a village to raise a child" held true. If you mis-behaved in public and a neighbor witnessed such, depending on the situation a couple of things could happen; either you were publicly admonished and reprimanded by the observer and/or your mother was waiting at home for you, and you REALLY did NOT want that to happen! The one-sided discussion could go something like this: "What were you doing with.....? Who gave you permission? Why did Miss Mary (or Myrtle or Mildred et al) have to correct your behavior? You brought shame on our family....." By the same token, if you were in danger, you could be assured that someone would rush to your aid! Grown ups just made sure that ALL community kids were protected and they made sure that ALL community kids behaved as if they were properly brought up, NOT dragged up! It takes a village......pity that it appears that we forgot about that.
Load More Replies...I think we can all see who the OP's mother was parenting, and it wasn't the kids.
I totally understand a kid having an emotional breakdown in public, or having little emotional control (as developmentally age appropriate) but damaging property is totally unacceptable. I've been reading that a lot of makeup stores like Sephora have been having a major problem with this.
I was with my daughter in a store once when there was a child throwing a tantrum, and the child was old enough to know better. She asked me if she had ever done that. I told her I didn't think so, but if she had I was pretty sure it didn't happen a second time.
Load More Replies...
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