Woman Brings Her Own Food To A Vegan Wedding Because The Couple Didn’t Want To Cater To Her Specific Diet, Drama Ensues
Living with a food allergy can be incredibly difficult. You always have to be on the lookout for potential danger and weigh the odds of cross-contamination. And it becomes hard to relax if you get the munchies at a public event or a fun celebration like a wedding. After all, even if a chef caters to you specifically, you can never be 100% sure that there haven’t been nuts or what you’re allergic to in the vicinity of the kitchen. And a guest eating a piece of candy and accidentally touching your glass or plate might even make you go into anaphylactic shock.
So when it comes to catering to others, you’d expect that vegans—of all people—would have a bit more sympathy for people who are extremely picky about what they eat due to health reasons. You also probably wouldn’t think that someone would bring some eggs to a vegan wedding (or that they’d cause massive drama at a celebration of love). And yet, here we are: a redditor, who has major food allergies, turned to the AITA community to share what happened when she brought egg salad to her brother’s vegan wedding.
Scroll down to read about the vegan wedding egg drama in the redditor’s own words. The story isn’t as clear-cut as you’d think, and the AITA community had a whole bunch of different reactions to it. When you’ve read the OP’s post in full, let us know what you think in the comments, dear Pandas.
A couple of eggs recently ended up creating some major drama
Image credits: Summerinstantcrush
The guest, who has some severe food allergies, explained what happened at her brother’s vegan wedding when she packed a homemade meal
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Image credits: WeTV
The OP was very clear from the get-go that she’s aware of how nuanced the situation is, and she wanted the internet to hear their side of the story. As it turns out, two eggs are the line between an amazing wedding and a celebration that ends up being ruined, for some vegan brides.
Respect for one’s food preferences is a two-way street. The bride felt like she and her values were being disrespected by her sister-in-law. Meanwhile, the SIL who wrote the Reddit post, felt like she didn’t really have a choice but to bring her own food to the wedding, seeing as the people behind the food catering weren’t ‘professionals’ and there was no way to guarantee that there wouldn’t be any allergens in the dishes.
At the core of everything lies the question about if the OP should have just brought a simple vegan salad from her home, instead of one with eggs. She feels like she cleared the issue with her brother, the groom, beforehand. Meanwhile, on the day of the actual wedding, both the bride and groom were disappointed in the guest’s behavior. The bride even went as far as to call her SIL ‘selfish’ and accused her of ‘ruining’ the entire day.
A while back, Bored Panda spoke about food allergies and what to do when dining out, with pie artist and food expert Jessica Leigh Clark-Bojin. She made it very clear that if you have life-threatening food allergies, there’s never a 0% risk when you’re dining out. The burden of responsibility, in the expert’s opinion, can’t fall just on the restaurant’s shoulders, even if there’s crystal-clear communication between them and the allergic customer. Cross-contamination is a very real possibility even if everyone involved is a seasoned chef.
“Most restaurants will do their best to accommodate guests with specific dietary requests, but for certain life-threatening allergies, it’s not always possible due to the possibility of cross-contamination,” the pie artist told Bored Panda during an earlier interview. She stressed that there are differences between food allergies that make one uncomfortable and ones that pose an actual threat to one’s life.
“If you are lactose-intolerant and would like the restaurant to hold the cream sauce on your pasta, that’s likely no problem. If on the other hand, you have a deadly peanut allergy and would like the restaurant to hold the peanut sauce on your chicken satay, well, that’s another story,” the expert said.
“The kitchen can’t guarantee that trace amounts of the allergen will not make its way to your plate, and they (understandably) don’t want to be responsible for your anaphylaxis!” Jessica told us.
“If your allergies are so severe that they will cause you to have a spectacularly bad time should you come in contact with your triggers, it’s best if you stick to restaurants that have kitchens and menus which already exclude those items,” she said. People with allergies have to take the time to do their research about the restaurants they plan on visiting. They should also consider calling the restaurant or even going there in person to have a chat with the staff if they’re very worried about their food allergies.
The OP explained that she didn’t get any guidelines for what food she could bring
Some people thought that the woman did absolutely nothing wrong
However, others believe she should have packed something vegan to go match the happy couple’s food
And then there were those who thought that nobody was blameless. Here’s what they had to say
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Share on FacebookStorytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real. At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design. In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle. I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.
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Storytelling, journalism, and art are a core part of who I am. I've been writing and drawing ever since I could walk—there is nothing else I'd rather do. My formal education, however, is focused on politics, philosophy, and economics because I've always been curious about the gap between the ideal and the real. At work, I'm a Senior Writer and I cover a broad range of topics that I'm passionate about: from psychology and changes in work culture to healthy living, relationships, and design. In my spare time, I'm an avid hiker and reader, enjoy writing short stories, and love to doodle. I thrive when I'm outdoors, going on small adventures in nature. However, you can also find me enjoying a big mug of coffee with a good book (or ten) and entertaining friends with fantasy tabletop games and sci-fi movies.
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Austėja is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Photography.
She could have left the eggs off but at the same time the bride massively overreacted. If her eating eggs ruined her appetite and her wedding how does she even manage to function in the real world where people are eating meat products all the time? Does she scold everyone around her in other situations as well? I know many vegans are perfectly nice people but there is a certain breed that treats their dietary choices like a religion that they feel they have to force on others and it really feels like this woman may be in that category.
I can only imagine her being one of those typical self righteous pretentious vegan jerks you know the ones who remind you of the animal that died while you eat your bacon and how you’re supporting murder. I imagine she’s that type and I can’t see their marriage lasting. I guess I’m not particularly partial to vegans though considering all my experiences with them are not good
Load More Replies...I don't understand why veganism is the one kind of prejudiced A who we tolerate. Imagine someone bringing a mixed race date to a wedding and getting harangued for it being "off theme" and disgusting. Same situation. Don't try to control people, and don't worry about bacon bits in other people's salad.
It's not that we hate all vegans and stuff like that, we hate a certain breed of vegans who try to force everyone to be vegan, and insult people who are just minding their own business because they see an egg.
Have a theme for the wedding that’s proudly announced in advance, then a guest does something that is basically a slap in the face to the theme of a very special day.
But many eat egg substitutes, meat substitutes but then get made at otherd
It's not that it was seperate food it's that it was a vegan specific event.
I agree, but the decent vegans are the exception. Most are pretentious in some degree and it is very off putting
“Pretentious to some degree”? Seems you already made that decision before meeting “most” vegans. A vegan tries to say they are vegan and people get offended. That’s my experience. Other vegans I know have faced this hate when people find out they’re vegan before they’ve even had a chance to talk.
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I was going to say the opposite. An intolerance for people who are vegan is prejudiced. Shouldn’t tolerate that kind of hate anymore than hate directed towards interracial couples. I don’t see vegans being intolerant that way. Black Lives Matter activism is as strong as animal rights in the vegan community
Except intolerance for vegans isn't a thing. Intolance towards loud, irritating vegans who tell people what to eat, and organize events specifically to make people uncomfortable, and weaponize their wedding to use as some kind of cudgel to shame people who aren't vegan is a thing... But that really has very little to do with actually being vegan.
You know what I would do? If anyone talked to me like that while I was eating I'd Google on YouTube on how to kill farm animals safely or something like that and make.us both watch while I enjoyed my food.that will shut them up XDDDDDDD (And I mean propper kill farm.aninlas not some f****d up bruttal killing for fun type of vids.i mean normal quick and painless type of way)
No more disrespectful than attempting to weaponize your wedding as a justification to attack your friends and family lifestyle, or telling off a GUEST who came to celebrate your special day because the sack lunch that you invited her to bring was somehow offensive?
If she wants her vegan wedding she gets a vegan wedding. She provides the food. Its not telling people what to do it is eating what youre served. Basic respect guys. The fact that she brought her own food should be an exception tho. She is not tryinb to offend anyone she can just straight up die eating the wrong thing.
Nah, you just don't do it. The bride and groom had gone to a lot of trouble ensuring their wedding was in line with their beliefs/morality, and the groom sister rocks up with eggs. Extremely disrespectful of her. It is the equivalent of someone bring a roast pork sandwich to an Orthodox Jewish celebration. You just don't do it!
They didn't go to a lot of effort to make sure that the food was edible by all people, though. The brother was well aware of his sister's allergies, and rather than choose a caterer that could accommodate her allergies, he left her to fend for herself. If they couldn't respect her life or death allergies, why should she respect their decision to be vegan?
Some vegans don't have issues with eggs, so where does anyone draw the line?
If you eat eggs, you aren't a vegan. Vegan means no animal products like milk, cheese, butter, and the like. Eggs are squarely in that category. Even some vegetarians won't eat eggs. Of course, my dad had a "vegetarian" phase where he "only ate fish." So i see where you're coming from. People are dumb.
Ultimately eggs are vegan anyway. Commercial eggs never undergo a fertilisation process.
The conditions battery hens are kept in are horrendous. If you witnessed it it would likely make you think twice about supporting that industry. Not to mention the male chicks being ground up alive.
Marie, being vegan isn't the same as being vegetarian. Vegans don't believe in eating any products that come from animals. That not only includes eggs (fertilized or not), but also milk and even honey. They believe that eating these things amounts to exploiting animals.
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Because it's their wedding and she's a guest? Is it that hard for people to accommodate others for one single day without getting in a big strop that their needs weren't catered for? It's not about her. It wouldn't have been hard not to include the eggs
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The caterer was capable, but OP didn't trust her. That is OP's problem and not the groom and bride, who did what they could to accommodate her. It wouldn't have been hard to bring a meal that didn't contain animal products, or at least not in such a blatant way like putting the eggs on top of the salad.
Random, it wasn't a professional caterer, as stated in the post. If I had a life threatening food allergy, that would be a giant red flag for me.
Hazel, read it again. She specifically gave the reason why she was uncomfortable with the caterers was because they were not professionals.
Sorry but I have to disagree. First of all they should care for ALL of their guests. And besides the OP wrote she often brought her own food which has never been a problem before. So the couple knew what to expect. Her brother even agreed she could bring her own food. As someone with lots of food allergies I totally understand the OP didn't trust the caterer. It happend too many times to me.
I'd say the op should have expected that she would be expected to bring vegan food to a vegan wedding. It's just common sense.
So wrong, in many levels! The "proud-vegan-assholes" were not careful enough to assure for someone else, also having special diet, a risiko-free dish. So, because you are vegan, should everybody kiss your a*s? And take it normal your idiot behavior and arrogance
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It's hilarious how you assume everyone who is critisizing OP is vegan. No, not all of us are. I just think what she did was disrespectful and she could have brought a meal that wasn't offensive to the bride at her own wedding.
Listen to what you're saying. "She could have brought a MEAL that wasn't offensive to the bride." The meal was for her own consumption. If the bride chooses to take offense, that's on her.
Did they also check with everyone's makeup to make sure it was not animal tested and vegan?
They didn't provide proper catering to a person with a deadly allergy. If it was someone more important in the brides new life (such as her mother in law), she would have probably got a professional caterer or wouldn't have minded as much if they brought non-vegan food. She brought a vegetarian dish, she respected them enough not to bring steak or chicken, but the bride got mad. I believe the bride overreacted. If one egg is enough to ruin your wedding, then you must not be thinking about much other than if someone brings out an egg
Even a professional caterer can mess up and cross contamination is so sudden. Only way to be sure is to make the food yourself.
Also, it was a vegan wedding. If they didn't have enough money, how did they afford all the vegan items. Red lipstick that wasn't made from beetles, nothing from China(most products from China require animal testing), no real flowers because that can harm bees pollination, not driving a car ran on petrol, you know, or else if wouldn't be a true vegan wedding, right?
I didn't say OP wasn't important, but if it was someone more important (like I said, mother-in-law) the bride wouldn't have cared. Why? Because usually the mother-in-law makes or breaks a relationship. Most brides try to make the mother-in-law the happiest person there, while they don't really care as much about how the siblings, aunts, and cousins feel about them.
Please, tell me, how is steak or chicken worse than eggs, or more disrespectful?
Eggs are vegetarian, meat is not. Meat=dead animal. Eggs=animal product that is not an alive being, and chickens lay them evey 12hrs.
Vegan opinions are not valid. Honestly the whole movement is rotten to the core and it does not surprise me in the slightest the vegan bridzilla MUST flip her lid about two measles little eggs from a meal she did not pay for, have to eat, or prepare.
Unless she liked eggs in her salad, the bride could of ate her own food and gazed into the eyes of her new husband instead of worrying about what she's eating especially since they couldn't provide ONE thing for her to eat safely. And I feel like you were being sarcastic about the "certain breed" but dietary choices are related to spiritually and religion. Many are just lost to that knowledge but doesn't mean it has to be forced upon ppl. And if you believe it shouldn't be forced why state "she should of left the eggs off" if that's what she likes on her salad?
a soy allergy is a difficult one when eating vegan tho. It often has sog or traces of soy and the allergy as she discribes is severe. As someone with food allergies im scared of some types of food too. A few green leaves doesnt really sound like a main meal and i think the salad with eggs were more harmless than anything else she could have brought
That's what I'm thinking. The bride overreacted. How are they ever going to go to family events if seeing other people eat non- vegan foods throws her into a tizzy?
Have you met brides? I’ll admit I was a bit of a diva on my day. You get caught up in a horrible frenzy of perfection and if just one thing doesn’t go right it hurts on a weird and dumb level. Now there are some outrageous brides that go way overboard, but this bride I feel is well within her rights to be upset at SIL.
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Not really. It was her wedding, not a random outing. I don't think it's hard just to NOT eat animal products for a few hours.
I don't think, it's hard just respect other people's eating choices. Do you think, you are some kind of goodness, eating vegan? I have bad news for you: in 1st world countries, like Europe, feeding your toddler vegan, is child-abuse.
Europe isn't a country and I really think you'd be able to feed a toddler vegan here. But you need to do it right, which is hard. A lot of vegan kids end up undernourished.
She's bringing her own food anyway. She's not demanding anything from the bride/groom. It's not their business what she puts in her lunchbox. If they wanted a say, they needed to have a meal ready that she could eat.
So if she is at a wedding for two omnivores, should she be forced to eat meat if it is the bride and grooms beliefs that meat is part of a well balanced diet? The biggest issue is putting people in a lose lose situation. I'm willing to bet that when my sister gets married, it'll be a vegan wedding. Then I'm forced to either abandon my beliefs (that it's not a meal without meat), bring my own meat dish, or avoid her wedding all together, making me a shmuck regardless of my decision. Quit forcing your beliefs on others!
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I think that's the thing non vegans don't get: to her, the eggs are morally reprehensible, having them at her wedding will have reminded her of something she finds extremely distressing (ie the belief that animals are being exploited horrifically). Her wedding day is meant to be a special day for her and her partner, not a day in the real world. I agree her reaction seems pretty OTT but I still think the guest is a bit the arsehole. Almost feels like they did it to make a point or for attention, and that's maybe how the bride perceived it.
I think republicans are morally reprehensible. That said, if I go out of my way to turn my wedding into a political statement, I've crossed a line. Theme or not. That's not reasonable behavior. Themes are supposed to be fun. Just because you're having a dungeons and dragons themed wedding, doesn't mean you get to tell people what kind of underwear to bring. Same thing here. Her food for her. She likes, she eats, life goes on.
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Democrats are MUCH more morally reprehensible than Republicans could ever think of being, and if you're one of those blind, hate fueled, hypocritical, vile fcks you're willfully ignorant and don't deserve the platform you've rápêd, tortured, and killed for. Sincerely, an independent.
Good lord, Gonzo. That is way out of line. Democrats have "raped , killed and tortured?" And, no, I don't believe you are an Independent.
the bride *CHOSE* to be offended. She was on the lookout for something that might "ruin" her day. The bride chose her own reaction.
I agree. What particularly struck me was the bride staring at her during the whole meal. If she accidentally saw it (I don't think it was accidental) and was disgusted, she should have looked away, concentrate on her own meal or on her new husband (or on anybody or anything else there) and not on his sister and her meal. And saying a wedding is all about veganism is crazy, it's about two people coming together and celebrating their love with friends and families...or at least it should be
Load More Replies...I don't think she accidentally saw it, either. I think she was looking for it. She knew that that meal was going to be different and she was just looking for a way to nit pick.. She was just a b***h.
True, the bride overreacted but still. Bringing eggs to a vegan wedding is not thoughtful
She was never informed she had to bring vegan food it was two eggs she just wanted to be able to eat a meal at her brothers wedding
It's kind of self explanatory though when the theme is 'vegan' and the reason you can't eat their food is fear of cross contamination only. Had the caterer been a professional she would gladly have eaten the regular, vegan food, as she stated in the post.
I disagree, the beides personal xhoices for her diet and what is served at her wedding doesnt automatically ductate what his sister eats. Not to mention not everyone would realize that eggs might be an issue. This is just one incident in what's going to be a long list of problems for this family. Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, family BBQ, this woman is going to make everyone miserable and distance her husband from his family.
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She clearly knew the couple had planned a vegan menu and did what they could to plan an eco friendly wedding. You have to be daft not to realise you should bring a vegan-friendly meal.
Well your saying this like eggs aren't eco friendly
Exactly. It was not thoughtful, but it was hardly a crime. Brother is going to go mad trying to keep this chick happy!
And literally, the only person who noticed was the bride. That's it, nobody else said anything. That anything. Well the brother did, after wifey ran it enraged and pissed and moaned.
Ok, so let's just go out and insult everybody and anybody, maybe be racist to some black and Asian people, it will be **THEIR** Choice to be offended.
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And would you say the same to Orthodox Jews when someone brings pork sausages to their celebration? The bride was offended because a guest did an offensive thing.
Have you ever had a meal with an Orthodox Jew? Do they get offended by people eating things they themselves refuse to eat in front of them? My experience with religious diet restrictions, (which I'll admit, I've never been to a Jewish Orthodox wedding) is that they usually think of diet as a personal choice. No?
Vincent, my understanding of why pork is prohibited in Judaism is that historically it often carried nasty diseases. So it is both a religious and health issue for them, but like you, I doubt they would be offended at non-Jews eating it.
Vincent eating pork at an Orthodox Jewish event would be offensive. You also can't eat pork on Jewish grounds such as a synagogue. So if you brought pork onto the temple grounds it's a very big deal.
I think the vegan bride is going to have a lot of drama in her life if that's how she reacts to things not going perfectly her way. Sure, be a little annoyed but also get over yourself.
I can only imagine how many holidays and family gatherings shes going to ruin with her veganism.
Load More Replies...I think her reaction is completely reasonable, it's a wedding, a very special day.
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It's her wedding, not everyday life. And its her family, the sister in law, not any guest. I guess she expected more respect from her family. Because of the eggs, she can't say her wedding was vegan anymore and that no animals were harmed for that occasion on that none vegan food was consumed on the wedding. I guess the groom didn't specify it for the sister cause it's common sense, if you are going to a vegan wedding you eat vegan food, come on, she couldn't do it for one meal? I'm not vegan, but I get that it's almost like a religion. If you are Muslim but goes to a catholic wedding, you respect it and vice-versa, and for others religions too. Two eggs... it's almost like she putted it there intentionally, cause it would be ridiculously easy to go without those two eggs for only one meal.
You respect it, insofar as what? First of all, this is why most weddings offer a choice. So that they can avoid allergies or diet restrictions. Second of all, if you're a Muslim and you go to a wedding where literally nothing meets your diet, you don't eat, and you feel bad. Third, she brought her own food from home. It was a salad. Get over it.
She could have left the eggs off but at the same time the bride massively overreacted. If her eating eggs ruined her appetite and her wedding how does she even manage to function in the real world where people are eating meat products all the time? Does she scold everyone around her in other situations as well? I know many vegans are perfectly nice people but there is a certain breed that treats their dietary choices like a religion that they feel they have to force on others and it really feels like this woman may be in that category.
I can only imagine her being one of those typical self righteous pretentious vegan jerks you know the ones who remind you of the animal that died while you eat your bacon and how you’re supporting murder. I imagine she’s that type and I can’t see their marriage lasting. I guess I’m not particularly partial to vegans though considering all my experiences with them are not good
Load More Replies...I don't understand why veganism is the one kind of prejudiced A who we tolerate. Imagine someone bringing a mixed race date to a wedding and getting harangued for it being "off theme" and disgusting. Same situation. Don't try to control people, and don't worry about bacon bits in other people's salad.
It's not that we hate all vegans and stuff like that, we hate a certain breed of vegans who try to force everyone to be vegan, and insult people who are just minding their own business because they see an egg.
Have a theme for the wedding that’s proudly announced in advance, then a guest does something that is basically a slap in the face to the theme of a very special day.
But many eat egg substitutes, meat substitutes but then get made at otherd
It's not that it was seperate food it's that it was a vegan specific event.
I agree, but the decent vegans are the exception. Most are pretentious in some degree and it is very off putting
“Pretentious to some degree”? Seems you already made that decision before meeting “most” vegans. A vegan tries to say they are vegan and people get offended. That’s my experience. Other vegans I know have faced this hate when people find out they’re vegan before they’ve even had a chance to talk.
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I was going to say the opposite. An intolerance for people who are vegan is prejudiced. Shouldn’t tolerate that kind of hate anymore than hate directed towards interracial couples. I don’t see vegans being intolerant that way. Black Lives Matter activism is as strong as animal rights in the vegan community
Except intolerance for vegans isn't a thing. Intolance towards loud, irritating vegans who tell people what to eat, and organize events specifically to make people uncomfortable, and weaponize their wedding to use as some kind of cudgel to shame people who aren't vegan is a thing... But that really has very little to do with actually being vegan.
You know what I would do? If anyone talked to me like that while I was eating I'd Google on YouTube on how to kill farm animals safely or something like that and make.us both watch while I enjoyed my food.that will shut them up XDDDDDDD (And I mean propper kill farm.aninlas not some f****d up bruttal killing for fun type of vids.i mean normal quick and painless type of way)
No more disrespectful than attempting to weaponize your wedding as a justification to attack your friends and family lifestyle, or telling off a GUEST who came to celebrate your special day because the sack lunch that you invited her to bring was somehow offensive?
If she wants her vegan wedding she gets a vegan wedding. She provides the food. Its not telling people what to do it is eating what youre served. Basic respect guys. The fact that she brought her own food should be an exception tho. She is not tryinb to offend anyone she can just straight up die eating the wrong thing.
Nah, you just don't do it. The bride and groom had gone to a lot of trouble ensuring their wedding was in line with their beliefs/morality, and the groom sister rocks up with eggs. Extremely disrespectful of her. It is the equivalent of someone bring a roast pork sandwich to an Orthodox Jewish celebration. You just don't do it!
They didn't go to a lot of effort to make sure that the food was edible by all people, though. The brother was well aware of his sister's allergies, and rather than choose a caterer that could accommodate her allergies, he left her to fend for herself. If they couldn't respect her life or death allergies, why should she respect their decision to be vegan?
Some vegans don't have issues with eggs, so where does anyone draw the line?
If you eat eggs, you aren't a vegan. Vegan means no animal products like milk, cheese, butter, and the like. Eggs are squarely in that category. Even some vegetarians won't eat eggs. Of course, my dad had a "vegetarian" phase where he "only ate fish." So i see where you're coming from. People are dumb.
Ultimately eggs are vegan anyway. Commercial eggs never undergo a fertilisation process.
The conditions battery hens are kept in are horrendous. If you witnessed it it would likely make you think twice about supporting that industry. Not to mention the male chicks being ground up alive.
Marie, being vegan isn't the same as being vegetarian. Vegans don't believe in eating any products that come from animals. That not only includes eggs (fertilized or not), but also milk and even honey. They believe that eating these things amounts to exploiting animals.
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Because it's their wedding and she's a guest? Is it that hard for people to accommodate others for one single day without getting in a big strop that their needs weren't catered for? It's not about her. It wouldn't have been hard not to include the eggs
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The caterer was capable, but OP didn't trust her. That is OP's problem and not the groom and bride, who did what they could to accommodate her. It wouldn't have been hard to bring a meal that didn't contain animal products, or at least not in such a blatant way like putting the eggs on top of the salad.
Random, it wasn't a professional caterer, as stated in the post. If I had a life threatening food allergy, that would be a giant red flag for me.
Hazel, read it again. She specifically gave the reason why she was uncomfortable with the caterers was because they were not professionals.
Sorry but I have to disagree. First of all they should care for ALL of their guests. And besides the OP wrote she often brought her own food which has never been a problem before. So the couple knew what to expect. Her brother even agreed she could bring her own food. As someone with lots of food allergies I totally understand the OP didn't trust the caterer. It happend too many times to me.
I'd say the op should have expected that she would be expected to bring vegan food to a vegan wedding. It's just common sense.
So wrong, in many levels! The "proud-vegan-assholes" were not careful enough to assure for someone else, also having special diet, a risiko-free dish. So, because you are vegan, should everybody kiss your a*s? And take it normal your idiot behavior and arrogance
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It's hilarious how you assume everyone who is critisizing OP is vegan. No, not all of us are. I just think what she did was disrespectful and she could have brought a meal that wasn't offensive to the bride at her own wedding.
Listen to what you're saying. "She could have brought a MEAL that wasn't offensive to the bride." The meal was for her own consumption. If the bride chooses to take offense, that's on her.
Did they also check with everyone's makeup to make sure it was not animal tested and vegan?
They didn't provide proper catering to a person with a deadly allergy. If it was someone more important in the brides new life (such as her mother in law), she would have probably got a professional caterer or wouldn't have minded as much if they brought non-vegan food. She brought a vegetarian dish, she respected them enough not to bring steak or chicken, but the bride got mad. I believe the bride overreacted. If one egg is enough to ruin your wedding, then you must not be thinking about much other than if someone brings out an egg
Even a professional caterer can mess up and cross contamination is so sudden. Only way to be sure is to make the food yourself.
Also, it was a vegan wedding. If they didn't have enough money, how did they afford all the vegan items. Red lipstick that wasn't made from beetles, nothing from China(most products from China require animal testing), no real flowers because that can harm bees pollination, not driving a car ran on petrol, you know, or else if wouldn't be a true vegan wedding, right?
I didn't say OP wasn't important, but if it was someone more important (like I said, mother-in-law) the bride wouldn't have cared. Why? Because usually the mother-in-law makes or breaks a relationship. Most brides try to make the mother-in-law the happiest person there, while they don't really care as much about how the siblings, aunts, and cousins feel about them.
Please, tell me, how is steak or chicken worse than eggs, or more disrespectful?
Eggs are vegetarian, meat is not. Meat=dead animal. Eggs=animal product that is not an alive being, and chickens lay them evey 12hrs.
Vegan opinions are not valid. Honestly the whole movement is rotten to the core and it does not surprise me in the slightest the vegan bridzilla MUST flip her lid about two measles little eggs from a meal she did not pay for, have to eat, or prepare.
Unless she liked eggs in her salad, the bride could of ate her own food and gazed into the eyes of her new husband instead of worrying about what she's eating especially since they couldn't provide ONE thing for her to eat safely. And I feel like you were being sarcastic about the "certain breed" but dietary choices are related to spiritually and religion. Many are just lost to that knowledge but doesn't mean it has to be forced upon ppl. And if you believe it shouldn't be forced why state "she should of left the eggs off" if that's what she likes on her salad?
a soy allergy is a difficult one when eating vegan tho. It often has sog or traces of soy and the allergy as she discribes is severe. As someone with food allergies im scared of some types of food too. A few green leaves doesnt really sound like a main meal and i think the salad with eggs were more harmless than anything else she could have brought
That's what I'm thinking. The bride overreacted. How are they ever going to go to family events if seeing other people eat non- vegan foods throws her into a tizzy?
Have you met brides? I’ll admit I was a bit of a diva on my day. You get caught up in a horrible frenzy of perfection and if just one thing doesn’t go right it hurts on a weird and dumb level. Now there are some outrageous brides that go way overboard, but this bride I feel is well within her rights to be upset at SIL.
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Not really. It was her wedding, not a random outing. I don't think it's hard just to NOT eat animal products for a few hours.
I don't think, it's hard just respect other people's eating choices. Do you think, you are some kind of goodness, eating vegan? I have bad news for you: in 1st world countries, like Europe, feeding your toddler vegan, is child-abuse.
Europe isn't a country and I really think you'd be able to feed a toddler vegan here. But you need to do it right, which is hard. A lot of vegan kids end up undernourished.
She's bringing her own food anyway. She's not demanding anything from the bride/groom. It's not their business what she puts in her lunchbox. If they wanted a say, they needed to have a meal ready that she could eat.
So if she is at a wedding for two omnivores, should she be forced to eat meat if it is the bride and grooms beliefs that meat is part of a well balanced diet? The biggest issue is putting people in a lose lose situation. I'm willing to bet that when my sister gets married, it'll be a vegan wedding. Then I'm forced to either abandon my beliefs (that it's not a meal without meat), bring my own meat dish, or avoid her wedding all together, making me a shmuck regardless of my decision. Quit forcing your beliefs on others!
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I think that's the thing non vegans don't get: to her, the eggs are morally reprehensible, having them at her wedding will have reminded her of something she finds extremely distressing (ie the belief that animals are being exploited horrifically). Her wedding day is meant to be a special day for her and her partner, not a day in the real world. I agree her reaction seems pretty OTT but I still think the guest is a bit the arsehole. Almost feels like they did it to make a point or for attention, and that's maybe how the bride perceived it.
I think republicans are morally reprehensible. That said, if I go out of my way to turn my wedding into a political statement, I've crossed a line. Theme or not. That's not reasonable behavior. Themes are supposed to be fun. Just because you're having a dungeons and dragons themed wedding, doesn't mean you get to tell people what kind of underwear to bring. Same thing here. Her food for her. She likes, she eats, life goes on.
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Democrats are MUCH more morally reprehensible than Republicans could ever think of being, and if you're one of those blind, hate fueled, hypocritical, vile fcks you're willfully ignorant and don't deserve the platform you've rápêd, tortured, and killed for. Sincerely, an independent.
Good lord, Gonzo. That is way out of line. Democrats have "raped , killed and tortured?" And, no, I don't believe you are an Independent.
the bride *CHOSE* to be offended. She was on the lookout for something that might "ruin" her day. The bride chose her own reaction.
I agree. What particularly struck me was the bride staring at her during the whole meal. If she accidentally saw it (I don't think it was accidental) and was disgusted, she should have looked away, concentrate on her own meal or on her new husband (or on anybody or anything else there) and not on his sister and her meal. And saying a wedding is all about veganism is crazy, it's about two people coming together and celebrating their love with friends and families...or at least it should be
Load More Replies...I don't think she accidentally saw it, either. I think she was looking for it. She knew that that meal was going to be different and she was just looking for a way to nit pick.. She was just a b***h.
True, the bride overreacted but still. Bringing eggs to a vegan wedding is not thoughtful
She was never informed she had to bring vegan food it was two eggs she just wanted to be able to eat a meal at her brothers wedding
It's kind of self explanatory though when the theme is 'vegan' and the reason you can't eat their food is fear of cross contamination only. Had the caterer been a professional she would gladly have eaten the regular, vegan food, as she stated in the post.
I disagree, the beides personal xhoices for her diet and what is served at her wedding doesnt automatically ductate what his sister eats. Not to mention not everyone would realize that eggs might be an issue. This is just one incident in what's going to be a long list of problems for this family. Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, family BBQ, this woman is going to make everyone miserable and distance her husband from his family.
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She clearly knew the couple had planned a vegan menu and did what they could to plan an eco friendly wedding. You have to be daft not to realise you should bring a vegan-friendly meal.
Well your saying this like eggs aren't eco friendly
Exactly. It was not thoughtful, but it was hardly a crime. Brother is going to go mad trying to keep this chick happy!
And literally, the only person who noticed was the bride. That's it, nobody else said anything. That anything. Well the brother did, after wifey ran it enraged and pissed and moaned.
Ok, so let's just go out and insult everybody and anybody, maybe be racist to some black and Asian people, it will be **THEIR** Choice to be offended.
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And would you say the same to Orthodox Jews when someone brings pork sausages to their celebration? The bride was offended because a guest did an offensive thing.
Have you ever had a meal with an Orthodox Jew? Do they get offended by people eating things they themselves refuse to eat in front of them? My experience with religious diet restrictions, (which I'll admit, I've never been to a Jewish Orthodox wedding) is that they usually think of diet as a personal choice. No?
Vincent, my understanding of why pork is prohibited in Judaism is that historically it often carried nasty diseases. So it is both a religious and health issue for them, but like you, I doubt they would be offended at non-Jews eating it.
Vincent eating pork at an Orthodox Jewish event would be offensive. You also can't eat pork on Jewish grounds such as a synagogue. So if you brought pork onto the temple grounds it's a very big deal.
I think the vegan bride is going to have a lot of drama in her life if that's how she reacts to things not going perfectly her way. Sure, be a little annoyed but also get over yourself.
I can only imagine how many holidays and family gatherings shes going to ruin with her veganism.
Load More Replies...I think her reaction is completely reasonable, it's a wedding, a very special day.
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It's her wedding, not everyday life. And its her family, the sister in law, not any guest. I guess she expected more respect from her family. Because of the eggs, she can't say her wedding was vegan anymore and that no animals were harmed for that occasion on that none vegan food was consumed on the wedding. I guess the groom didn't specify it for the sister cause it's common sense, if you are going to a vegan wedding you eat vegan food, come on, she couldn't do it for one meal? I'm not vegan, but I get that it's almost like a religion. If you are Muslim but goes to a catholic wedding, you respect it and vice-versa, and for others religions too. Two eggs... it's almost like she putted it there intentionally, cause it would be ridiculously easy to go without those two eggs for only one meal.
You respect it, insofar as what? First of all, this is why most weddings offer a choice. So that they can avoid allergies or diet restrictions. Second of all, if you're a Muslim and you go to a wedding where literally nothing meets your diet, you don't eat, and you feel bad. Third, she brought her own food from home. It was a salad. Get over it.
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