My thought is, why are you talking past the person. Why not just say "You'll get the hang of it." Encouraging and respectful to the person regardless of gender....

Just ask politely! Most trans or non binary people would be happy if you asked instead of guessing, assuming or not speaking to you at all 🙂 Ive started wearing a badge with my pronouns because this happens a lot, people don’t know how to address me and seem embarrassed about asking, i dont mind being asked! :-)

How hard is it to say "they'll get the hang of it " or "you'll get the hang of it"? See no gender pronouns needed. Put in the file of people who make issues when there are none there.

If you need to use a pronoun, try one. If you are corrected, then use the other one.

1. Why did she need to use pronouns 2. Theytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheytheythey

Why are we so keen to "roast" someone these days?

Do you even need to use pronouns when ordering a coffee?

I was at a convention once, managing a stall along with a friend. A fellow stallholder who was gender ambiguous in appearance started up a conversation, and a little way in my friend said "Excuse me, but what pronouns should I use?" The person told her, the conversation continued pleasantly, and all was well.

F**k. I usually ask pronouns or use they/them.

I feel bad for him he was being very polite, older people don't phrase things the same way; that doesn't mean they have different intentions with what they are saying, like he himself said, trans people are free to induvial expression and happiness like anyone else. His wife spends to much time online though, if I had to guess. People in real life will react to the question like this in my experience: .1 "Huh?, oh I'm not trans" .2 "Uh i use she/her" .3 not want to bring it up being misgendered" .4 not care .5 "which size would you prefer?"

Okay, all the people complaining didn’t read the last part of the post. I don’t remember if it was an edit or not, but it says that the issue didn’t come up when actually ordering, but while trying to say something to a coworker about the employee. When you’re talking directly to someone, you wouldn’t be using third person pronouns, but you would if you’re talking about them. And sure, she could have used “they”, but maybe she forgot. Or wasn’t comfortable yet with the idea of using a plural pronoun for a singular person (reasonable, it’s not what we’re used to). Or saying “they” would have made it unclear who she was talking about. Either way, I don’t think the commenters were actually talking about the right thing, so the complaints weren’t warranted.

What are egg shelves and how does one walk on them? Also why does someone gender have anything to do with having a conversation with them?

I think just saying you to the person will solve the he/she/they problem without asking the transperson any uncomfortable questions.

As far as I'm concerned, they/them are used to refer to people in the third person. As in, these people over here, they went with them people over there. I'm 61 and I'm not changing who I am or how I address people. This whole situation doesn't have to be the clusterfk some are making it out to be! If they have a name tag then use their name. If not, then don't address them with any kind of pronoun. Just say HI and ask for what you want.

I can in a way understand this but I have never had a problem with genders, but one has to be so careful what one say to anyone before they are throwing racist at you/

The thing is... you don't consciously think when you talk about what words you are specifically going to use. The words come out as you are thinking. You don't think consciously about walking "left leg, right leg", you just walk. You don't think consciously about a lot of things. if you did... you would be constantly mentally exhausted. SO, saying "they" instead of "he" or "she" takes effort, and the older you are, the more effort it takes... those old ways of talking are deeply burnt into your synapses. That doesn't mean you shouldn't try your best, and then simply say "sorry, this is all new to me" when you make a mistake. rather than getting mad at everyone else.

"We want people to respect trans people and engage in learning about trans people as to not offend" *person tries to do just that* "nooooo not like ThAt"