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Woman Leaves Husband For Another Man, Is Shocked When He Stops Paying Spousal Support
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Woman Leaves Husband For Another Man, Is Shocked When He Stops Paying Spousal Support

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Till death do us part… or at least until one spouse moves in with someone else? This made one man turn to the internet for some clarity and advice. This juicy Reddit post has us all scratching our heads and giggling at the same time, as the OP (original poster) finds himself in the middle of a weird legal dispute with his soon-to-be ex-wife.

If you’ve been craving some relationship drama, you’re not the only one! So, grab your popcorn, because this one’s a rollercoaster!

More info: Reddit

Unhappy wife moves in with a new guy, who she claims is ‘just a friend’, shortly after asking her husband for a separation

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

The husband stopped paying spousal support to his wife after seeking legal advice and is now asking the internet if he is overreacting

Image credits: DronePilotNYC

Image credits: RDNE Stock project  (not the actual photo)

“She left me and didn’t even attempt reconciliation. Should I really be paying for her new life with this new guy?”

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Image credits: DronePilotNYC

Our Reddit friend finds himself in the middle of a serious marital crisis as his wife drops a bombshell – she’s unhappy and wants out. Ouch! If that was not painful enough, the situation gets even spicier when the OP finds out that wifey dearest had been cozying up to another man at the movies, while our guy was off working overseas.

But, before he could say “spousal support,” she packed her bags and moved in with Mr. Mystery Movie Date, claiming they’re “just friends”. Now that’s what we call a Hollywood-worthy plot twist.

Here’s where things get legally tangled. The OP consults his lawyer, who advises him to stop giving wifey any money since, under state law, cheaters aren’t eligible for spousal support. This raises our OP’s dilemma: is he overreacting by cutting off the financial lifeline to his soon-to-be ex-wife? After all, she’s the one who called it quits and didn’t bother to look back. Is it fair for him to keep funding her Netflix and chill sessions with the new dude?

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However, while she’s singing the “just friends” tune, “she claims she has every right to see or sleep with other people once we are separated,” the OP recalls. I don’t know about you, but we’re hearing the full-blown orchestra of betrayal in the background of this digital soap opera.

Image credits: MART PRODUCTION (not the actual photo)

The question that arises here: why did the wife decide to skip a few steps by directly moving out, rather than opting for the conventional route of a trial separation? It’s a move that definitely raises some eyebrows. According to an article published by The Gottman Institute, “A trial separation is an informal agreement between two spouses to live apart and there are no legal agreements, judges, or lawyers involved. This is time spent living apart and agreeing to evaluate their feelings toward each other and intentions at the end of the time period.”

While the OP is trying to deal with the emotional outcome of the situation, he’s left questioning the sincerity of his wife’s claims about the nature of her relationship with this mysterious roommate. Is it just a case of two friends finding comfort in each other’s company, or is there a deeper connection involved? If they are, in fact, just friends, why is it that the wife hadn’t mentioned anything about being unhappy? If she had, maybe a trial separation could have avoided all this drama. “For some couples, a trial separation makes sense because they can use the time to honestly evaluate the relationship, work on themselves, and work on the relationship,” the article states.

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Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)

This shocked husband finds himself caught between feelings of betrayal and a sense of confusion, unsure of where to turn next in this real-life drama that seems straight out of a scripted series. “I can’t just destroy my ex financially without good cause.”

Here’s where our protagonist has turned to the internet for some good ol’ fashioned moral support and a reality check. And boy, did he get it! Our virtual cheerleading squad has spoken loud and clear–the OP should take his lawyer’s advice and stop paying spousal support to his wife.

According to the people in the comments, our OP did the right thing by talking to a lawyer before taking any action. While he’s cutting the financial cord, he’s not out for blood. It’s all about having some dignity and not stooping to his ex-wife’s level, even if she’d already booked her one-way ticket to Cheatersville.

So, what’s your verdict in this case? Is our Reddit buddy overreacting, or is he the patron saint of exes everywhere? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

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People in the comments say that the OP should listen to his lawyer and stop financing his wife’s new relationship

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Monica Selvi

Monica Selvi

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Hi! I'm Moni. I’m a globetrotting creative with a camera in one hand and a notebook in the other. I’ve lived in 4 different countries, an visited 17, soaking up inspiration wherever I go. A marketer by trade but a writer at heart, I’ve been crafting stories, poems, and songs, and creating quirky characters since I was 7.

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Monica Selvi

Monica Selvi

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Hi! I'm Moni. I’m a globetrotting creative with a camera in one hand and a notebook in the other. I’ve lived in 4 different countries, an visited 17, soaking up inspiration wherever I go. A marketer by trade but a writer at heart, I’ve been crafting stories, poems, and songs, and creating quirky characters since I was 7.

Monika Pašukonytė

Monika Pašukonytė

Author, BoredPanda staff

Read more »

I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

Read less »

Monika Pašukonytė

Monika Pašukonytė

Author, BoredPanda staff

I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

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arthbach
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There is a reason we consult lawyers, and then follow their advice. It's because they went to university, and actually studied in this very field. They also accrue years of experience, and will talk with their colleagues if they come across something new and interesting. Listen to your lawyer. Follow their advice. - - - - - It's perfectly possible the person she moved in with is not a romantic/sexual partner, and is indeed just a friend. However, they are the ones who would have to prove this.

Joe Bloe
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hard to make the point he should pay for her... He doesn't even tralk about having kids together. She's a strong independant woman, she made choices, OP is not her sugar daddy.

Secret Squirrel
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It definitely depends on their situation. But it's common before the divorce is finalised, to pay the partner that isn't getting access to shared assets like housing, cars, storage etc.

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Secret Squirrel
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Spousal support doesn't usually hinge on fidelity. Make sure you are getting good advice as it is a crime to withhold it/fall behind.

Aline
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It sounds like OP is not officially divorced and I want to warn against cutting off finances before there's a legal agreement. You can add what you are sending now into the discussion bout who gets what, but cutting off your wife from shared finances because you are upset that she went to dinner with someone while you were overseas will not help your case. Unless there's a prenup, cheating or not doesn't matter in how you divvy up the split. She could definitely use this to argue controlling and vindictive behavior patterns, and it is a pretty convincing piece of evidence.

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arthbach
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There is a reason we consult lawyers, and then follow their advice. It's because they went to university, and actually studied in this very field. They also accrue years of experience, and will talk with their colleagues if they come across something new and interesting. Listen to your lawyer. Follow their advice. - - - - - It's perfectly possible the person she moved in with is not a romantic/sexual partner, and is indeed just a friend. However, they are the ones who would have to prove this.

Joe Bloe
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hard to make the point he should pay for her... He doesn't even tralk about having kids together. She's a strong independant woman, she made choices, OP is not her sugar daddy.

Secret Squirrel
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It definitely depends on their situation. But it's common before the divorce is finalised, to pay the partner that isn't getting access to shared assets like housing, cars, storage etc.

Load More Replies...
Secret Squirrel
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Spousal support doesn't usually hinge on fidelity. Make sure you are getting good advice as it is a crime to withhold it/fall behind.

Aline
Community Member
6 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It sounds like OP is not officially divorced and I want to warn against cutting off finances before there's a legal agreement. You can add what you are sending now into the discussion bout who gets what, but cutting off your wife from shared finances because you are upset that she went to dinner with someone while you were overseas will not help your case. Unless there's a prenup, cheating or not doesn't matter in how you divvy up the split. She could definitely use this to argue controlling and vindictive behavior patterns, and it is a pretty convincing piece of evidence.

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