Woman Wonders If She’s A Jerk For Not Supporting Husband When His Dad Did What He Did To Her
Pregnancy is an emotional ride—a thrilling one with ups and downs that are enough to cause concern. For couples, finding out they are pregnant is a moment to be enjoyed and absorbed for themselves before making it public.
However, today’s Original Poster (OP) couldn’t relate to that as her husband went about spilling the news to friends and family after she pleaded with him not to mention it yet.
More info: Reddit
The moment you tell someone not to do something, it suddenly just becomes irresistible to them
Image credits: Tima Miroshnichenko / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The author found out she was pregnant, but asked her husband not to mention it for some time, just so they could adjust to the news
Image credits: Ok-Establishment7358
Image credits: Liliana Drew / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The husband didn’t do much of a good job keeping it in as he went around informing friends and family, except his grandfather
Image credits: Ok-Establishment7358
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
His father then told him that he would announce the news to his grandfather if he didn’t do it on time, but that made him angry
Image credits: Ok-Establishment7358
After venting his frustration to the author, she told him that he had put her in the same position when he went around announcing her pregnancy
Once she had discovered she was pregnant with her second child, the OP asked her husband to keep it a secret from everyone for a bit. Being a pregnant mother, just like every other mother, she needed time to adjust to the massive news without the necessary round of congratulations and questioning immediately. Her husband was too excited, though, to keep the secret to himself.
Within minutes of talking with her, he had informed his work friend and another friend. While she was upset, he brushed it aside, telling her he would be keeping it a secret from then onwards. That promise did not last long. Throughout the weeks, he pressured her to break the news to his family before she was ready. When she didn’t, he “accidentally” blurted it out over casual coffee with his parents.
The pattern repeated itself, and the husband kept going on and on spreading the news without her consent. He had, however, not informed his grandparents. His dad then issued an ultimatum: reveal the news to his grandparents or he would. Suddenly, the husband was on the receiving end of the very behavior his wife had been upset about. Frustrated and irate, he complained to his wife about his father’s insensitive actions.
Her response was a calm yet pointed observation: now he knew how she felt when she had asked him to keep the pregnancy announcement to themselves for a bit and he didn’t respect it. The comment, while valid, was not well-received. Instead, he accused her of being selfish and stuck in a “victim mentality.” That sparked a heated argument that left them both stewing in silence for the rest of the evening.
Image credits: Timur Weber / Pexels (not the actual photo)
According to the BBC, there is no definitive “right” or “wrong” time to announce a pregnancy. What truly matters is approaching the conversation with care, ensuring it takes place when the woman feels ready. This is particularly important, as she carries the greater emotional burden during pregnancy.
The OP’s husband breaking his promise after assuring her that he wouldn’t speak about the pregnancy yet was dangerous, and Insights Counseling Center affirms that. They explain that breaking promises in a marriage weakens the trust that is vital for a strong relationship as it could lead to unhealthy communication patterns and emotional distance.
Straight Talk Counseling highlights that hypocrisy occurs when individuals claim moral standards they fail to uphold themselves. Often, this involves excusing their own behavior while judging others for the same actions.
They suggest it stems from ego, self-righteousness, and a lack of humility, which can mask deeper issues such as fear or low self-esteem. Hypocrites may justify their actions as being more noble or well-meaning than others’, using hypocrisy as a defense mechanism to avoid self-reflection or accountability.
The OP feels she was wrong to have mentioned it. What do you think? Do you think she was right to point out the irony to her husband, or should she have approached it differently? We would love to hear your thoughts!
Netizens called the author’s husband out for being a hypocrite and completely unreliable
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Poor lady, she's not even that far along. I accidentally told a coworker I was pregnant at like 9 weeks, and it got super weird when a few months later she asked how it was going and my reply was, "miscarriage". Soooo, I get being excited and wanting to share, but respect your wife's wishes dude.
Yeah, with my son we didn't tell anyone till 16 weeks, with my current we didn't even tell my son till 20, then others after that. Losses are sadly too common.
Load More Replies...Just plead morning sickness and skip family events if you don't want the fuss.
"Mr. Unaware of 2025, Ladies and Gentlemen." I agree with the above comment that says: "Keep stuff to yourself if you don't want hubby blabbing about *your* business."
All I kept on thinking while reading this is, "Why are you having another child with this glassbowl?"
It's not the same situation. What the husband did is 100x worse. Once the parents start telling people, you can ask them to keep it a secret, but basically that's it - your big news is out there, and your ability to control it is limited. You can't really be that mad when someone of the multitudes you've told wants to tell someone else. In fact, it's arguable that you should be grateful for them coming to you before spreading the news. However, when you betray your nervous spouse by telling people, you have absolutely f**ked up.
I swear, there are at least four things on the internet every day that make me glad I wasn't able to have children and that I'm divorced.
Guess the husband will find out about the third kid (if there is one) in the delivery room.
Greetings to everyone that is reading this testimony of my i want to appreciate the good work of Dr Etiosa. I have been rejected by my husband after three(3) years of marriage just because another woman had a spell on him and he left me and the kid to suffer. one day when i was reading through the web, i saw a post on how this spell caster called Dr Etiosa, help a lot of women to get back there husband and i gave him a reply to his Whatsapp number +2347065856438 and he told me that a woman had a spell on my husband and he told me that he will help me and after 12 hours that i will have my husband back. i believed him and today i am glad to let you all know that this spell caster have the power to bring lovers back. because my husband come back home after the spell work within 12 hours all thanks to his good work:: You can also contact him on E-mail :: Doctoretiosa58@gmail.com
Lots of women wait they're at least 12-16 weeks pregnant to make sure everything is going well.
Load More Replies...Poor lady, she's not even that far along. I accidentally told a coworker I was pregnant at like 9 weeks, and it got super weird when a few months later she asked how it was going and my reply was, "miscarriage". Soooo, I get being excited and wanting to share, but respect your wife's wishes dude.
Yeah, with my son we didn't tell anyone till 16 weeks, with my current we didn't even tell my son till 20, then others after that. Losses are sadly too common.
Load More Replies...Just plead morning sickness and skip family events if you don't want the fuss.
"Mr. Unaware of 2025, Ladies and Gentlemen." I agree with the above comment that says: "Keep stuff to yourself if you don't want hubby blabbing about *your* business."
All I kept on thinking while reading this is, "Why are you having another child with this glassbowl?"
It's not the same situation. What the husband did is 100x worse. Once the parents start telling people, you can ask them to keep it a secret, but basically that's it - your big news is out there, and your ability to control it is limited. You can't really be that mad when someone of the multitudes you've told wants to tell someone else. In fact, it's arguable that you should be grateful for them coming to you before spreading the news. However, when you betray your nervous spouse by telling people, you have absolutely f**ked up.
I swear, there are at least four things on the internet every day that make me glad I wasn't able to have children and that I'm divorced.
Guess the husband will find out about the third kid (if there is one) in the delivery room.
Greetings to everyone that is reading this testimony of my i want to appreciate the good work of Dr Etiosa. I have been rejected by my husband after three(3) years of marriage just because another woman had a spell on him and he left me and the kid to suffer. one day when i was reading through the web, i saw a post on how this spell caster called Dr Etiosa, help a lot of women to get back there husband and i gave him a reply to his Whatsapp number +2347065856438 and he told me that a woman had a spell on my husband and he told me that he will help me and after 12 hours that i will have my husband back. i believed him and today i am glad to let you all know that this spell caster have the power to bring lovers back. because my husband come back home after the spell work within 12 hours all thanks to his good work:: You can also contact him on E-mail :: Doctoretiosa58@gmail.com
Lots of women wait they're at least 12-16 weeks pregnant to make sure everything is going well.
Load More Replies...
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