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Growing up, we all hear the same pieces of wisdom: “Trust your gut,” “Ignore the bullies,” or “Ask for forgiveness, not permission.” These sayings are meant to help us, but do they always work in real life?
Some Reddit users think these popular tips don’t always deliver as promised. We’ve put together a list of advice that people believe might not be as useful as it seems. Check it out below and let us know if you agree or not!
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#1
When there's a bully, just ignore them. Sorry but most bullies won't stop just cause you ignore them. Sometimes you gotta put them in their place.
nottheactualphoto 3 months ago
My mom told us to "just ignore the bullies." "They're only trying to get a rise out of you." That turned out not to be the case. What they were trying to do was to obtain gratification by beating up smaller kids.
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#2
"Stay for the kids/avoid a broken home."
Honey, if your parents loathe eachother, you not only see it, You feel it, You suffer from it, and you probably blame yourself.
Theres like radial emotional and mental abuse and fatigues and everything. On the kid. The person who allegedly not separating is suppose to help.
Stop f*****g yalls kids up and admit you hate eachother. You can be AMAZING coparents and never see eachother face to face.
Two STABLE homes is far happier than one in turmoil.
#3
'If she says NO, pursue her harder.' WORST dating advice
winterwidow87 3 months ago (edited)
I blame romantic movies for this one. The guy who doesn't take no for an answer and starts stalking the girl always ends up with her.
#4
“Forgive and forget” should be “forgive, but don’t forget” because 9/10 times peoples poor behavior is a part of a behavioral pattern. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me for giving you the chance.
#5
Forgiveness is seen as this high achievement of humanity that all should strive for.
No. Sometimes people shouldn’t be forgiven. Some things are unforgivable.
#6
Everything happens for a reason/there's a purpose in everything that happens. Awful advice for any type of situation where someone was a victim.
#7
God gives you what you can handle. No. This is not true. If it were then people wouldn't commit [self-harm]. People's lives and mental health can implode all too easily.
winterwidow87 3 months ago (edited)
If god gives cancer patients and their families (especially pediatric patients) what he thinks they can handle, then god is a dîck who doesn't deserve worshipping.
#8
Find a job you love and you will never work a day in your life. This might work for 1% of people. It makes the rest of us feel like we're doing it wrong.
iseefractals 3 months ago
It doesn't matter how much you start out loving something, work ALWAYS becomes "ugh...work" because it's no longer a choice, it's an obligation, it's not an escape or a means of relaxation...it's a means of survival, and what you love as a teenager or someone in their early 20's....is absolutely not what you're going to love a decade later. A job, is a job, is a job. It facilitates your life, it shouldn't define it.
#9
“Trust your gut.” I have anxiety, my gut is virtually always telling me to panic and never do anything lol.
#10
This may be an unpopular opinion, but 'You can't expect anyone to love you if you don't love yourself first.' I get it, but I think a lot of people say that because they don't want to deal with certain types of people. Listen, not everyone can be filled with self-love. It can take years to learn this. In fact, some people can interpret this as they shouldn't even attempt to find love because they don't love themselves, and I think that is so wrong.
In most people's lives, there are others who love them just as they are. In my opinion, that is proof that you are lovable to others, even if you struggle to love yourself. And sometimes other people's love is what is needed to help you see that you can love yourself too. That's not to say that this advice is purely terrible, but it doesn't work for everyone. Just be smart about it.
Doctor Strange 3 months ago
I always share this when I can. No, you don't have to love yourself first. Many people need to be loved before they can love themselves. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-fitness/201001/you-dont-need-love-yourself-first
#11
"Tough it out"
No. Do not tough it out. Talk about it, take breaks, have a meal and think it over. If you are sick toughing it out won't fix that. If you are depressed, toughing jt out won't fix that. If you are hurt, toughing jt out won't fix that. Take care of yourself and then keep going, or you'll run yourself into the ground.
#12
This was never true, but I heard it everywhere in pop culture. Treat women like c**p. They love it. No, they don't.
#13
“Only date people in your league”. Leagues don’t exist. You never know who a person will be attracted to.
Glen Ellyn 3 months ago (edited)
If you're concerned about "your league," you're a shallow person.
#14
"Ask for forgiveness not permission." So shockingly obvious how this could backfire in any number of personal or professional scenarios.
#15
Give 100 percent in everything. No. Give enough to get it done at a decent level. Extra effort usually doesn't pay off. .
#16
They’re just jealous. 90% of the time they’re not jealous, they just don’t like you.
PeepPeep the duck 3 months ago
We had some adult come to school and did a pep talk about how ‘people only hate because of jealousy’ and I was confused as to what I’d be jealous of hitler and osama bin laden over 😂 (it was 2001)
#17
"Don't be afraid to do what you love, and the money will follow"
This can be true but also could get you in a lot of trouble.
nottheactualphoto 3 months ago
The money *might* follow. Meanwhile, you've turned fun into work.
#18
Happy wife, happy life.
If you hear a married man say that in a serious manner, it's almost 100% that neither he nor his wife are happy.
#19
If you see a snake it’s probably venomous and you should kill it, especially if your kids are around
1. What the f**k? No it’s not and it’s not gonna try to kill you 2. It demonstrates an extremely low understanding of the ecosystem as snakes are a massive part of it 3. Not all snakes are venomous lol.
ElfVibratorGlitter 3 months ago
Never heard this advice, ever. I sincerely hope it's not a common sentiment.
#20
Just be yourself.
The spirit of this, I agree with completely. But so many people think it means to act however they want and there should be no consequences. You still have to modulate your behavior in such a way that it is appropriate in a given social situation. Just be yourself means live in accordance with your own values and pursue your own goals. It does not mean to be a d**k and say everything vile thing that pops into your head and then be indignant when it’s received badly.
Jean-Louis Bolomey 3 months ago
Just be yourself...no. You belong to a society within which you can show your individuality. But ultimately you owe a lot to the society from which you came. "Just be yourself" is the ultimate egoistical advice :-D
#21
In dating “if it’s not a hell-yes, then it’s a no.”
More realistic is “you don’t need to know if you want to marry them someday, you only need to know if you want to see them again.”.
#22
Be vulnerable at work. Complete horshes**t. Even the best workplaces have vindictive a******s who will take your vulnerability and use it to undermine you.
#23
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
This line (from Eleanor Roosevelt) sucks. Of course people can feel bad about themselves based off of another person's comment without actually being bad!
#24
You have to go to college if you want to get a good job.
ElfVibratorGlitter 3 months ago
Hahahaha. Yeah, no. No you don't. Trade schools seem to be where it's at these days.
#25
Kill them with kindness. Sometimes people are jerks who step way over the line, and I have no problem calling them on it. I’ve dealt with enough bullies in my life to stand up to people who start drama on the regular. I appreciate the same candidness from my friends.
Now that said, I rarely react to insults from people I’m not close with. If they aren’t important to me, I just don’t care what they think of me. The fact that I don’t even bother to respond really sets them off :).
PeepPeep the duck 3 months ago
I love this tactic personally as nothing infuriates at the angry yelling and tantrum throwing people than a huge smile and a nice tone, no matter how hard they try to get the reaction they want from you. It’s fun
#26
Be the bigger person. Sometimes this is good advice but generally it means bowing down to someone who wants to hurt you.
TotallyNOTAFox 3 months ago (edited)
We have the saying "The smart one steps back" - Great, that means the idiots will be in charge and ruin everything
#27
*treat it as if it was your own.* treating it like it's someone else's that means I have to return it in as good condition as I found it, otherwise i'm a huge a*****e. if it's my own, then i don't have to return it at all, i can scratch it up, slop spaghetti on it, use it to wipe my a*s with.
The Phantom Stranger 3 months ago
I think "treat it as if you paid for it" might be a better way of stating this. Studies have shown that children will take much better care of a toy if they had to pay for it with their own money rather than just having it gifted to them. I think the same holds true for adults--we see a lot of stories on BP about entitled people casually destroying things (cars, electronics, whatever) because they've never had to pay for anything and just assume Daddy will buy them a new one. People who have to scrimp and save to purchase those items are going to be much more protective of them.
#28
It gets better. Like no it doesn’t “get better” it takes time and effort to get it “better” it doesn’t on its own.
False hope helps no own because when it doesn’t get better on its own you leave someone it a very vulnerable space.
winterwidow87 3 months ago
It doesn't get better if you don't do something about it. Talk to someone, go to therapy, and then you'll see the improvement. Don't just wait for things to get better on their own, especially regarding mental health.
#29
As of late the whole advice to "spend today because there is no future". people who spout such rhetoric are beyond foolish. not looking forward to having to take care of them later in life because they done f****d up.
Jean-Louis Bolomey 3 months ago
Idiot advive from one of the great Church fathers, Saint (?) Augustine : "Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may die"... Take responsibility for today and tomorrow you will benefit from your foresight....
#30
Fake it till you make it, uhh no. Faking anything doesn't make anyone feel better.
What do you think ?
Soy 3 months ago
Guess what, any wisdom you put in one sentence isn't gonna be universally true.
Angrykitten 3 months ago
I'm surprised never quit isn't on here. Sometimes it is absolutely the right thing to do.
The Phantom Stranger 3 months ago
"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a d*mn fool about it." -Mark Twain
Load More Replies...
The Phantom Stranger 3 months ago
I think most of these are situationally true, but they don't apply in every situation, and they fail to account for the fact that there are bad actors in the world who will take advantage of you given the smallest chance. Advice needs to be tempered with wisdom.
Soy 3 months ago
Guess what, any wisdom you put in one sentence isn't gonna be universally true.
Angrykitten 3 months ago
I'm surprised never quit isn't on here. Sometimes it is absolutely the right thing to do.
The Phantom Stranger 3 months ago
"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a d*mn fool about it." -Mark Twain
Load More Replies... The Phantom Stranger 3 months ago
I think most of these are situationally true, but they don't apply in every situation, and they fail to account for the fact that there are bad actors in the world who will take advantage of you given the smallest chance. Advice needs to be tempered with wisdom.
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