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Woman Shares Things That Are OK And Not OK To Say To Other Women That Live Different Lives
Women often find themselves in lose-lose situations when it comes to living the lifestyle they want. Those who are more outspoken about their sexuality or are less conservative will get called derogatory terms and told to cover up; on the other side of the spectrum women who are more conservative will be called ‘prudes.’
Writer delafro_ took to Twitter to speak on this issue, addressing women on how they speak to one another. Misogyny abounds among men, but there is something even more distressing about women putting each other down. In her thread, she tackled how we can express our lifestyle choices without belittling others, and it is a must read.
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Writer delafro_ took to Twitter to address how women belittle each other for their lifestyle choices
Image credits: delafro_
Image credits: delafro_
She explained that you can live your life however you want without putting down others who don’t make the same choices
Image credits: delafro_
And provided examples on the ‘ok’ and ‘not ok’ ways to speak to each other
Image credits: delafro_
Image credits: delafro_
Image credits: delafro_
Image credits: delafro_
At the end she made it clear that the same went for both sides of the lifestyle spectrum
Image credits: delafro_
Image credits: delafro_
Image credits: delafro_
Image credits: delafro_
Image credits: delafro_
Meredith Fuller author of Working with Bitches and vocational psychologist identified three main reasons women are nasty to other women: “Because they project their unwanted parts onto the other women — especially their fear, envy, jealousy, suspicion, resentment, rage, anxiety, or lack of self-esteem and confidence; Because they can get away with it — as a sport, fun, panacea to boredom, delight in spite, or because their lack of curiosity/tolerance of difference suggests they probably don’t like people anyway; Because they don’t have the interpersonal and intrapersonal communication skills to recognize or alter their behavior.”
Most of the people in the comments stood behind her powerful message
Joyce Benenson spent thirty years researching competition between the sexes and concluded that evolution designed women to be more competitive than men. Due to a combination of social, psychological and biological factors, women hold a more fearsome survival instinct. Benenson explains that women must disguise these competitive strategies due to the system in which we operate, which is why they appear in less overt ways.
So how do women fight biology? Barbara Markway, a clinical psychologist, author and founder of The Self-Compassion Project, has these words of wisdom: ‘Don’t blame yourself. We are instinctively hard-wired for survival. The key is to pause before we act out of this mode.’
What do you think ?
Carol Emory 5 years ago
My only concern is not the women that cook and clean for their man or are conservative and cover up...do what you want. But I do have a problem with a woman whose desire to do so comes from a submissive lack of self esteem and that they set themselves up for abusive relationships. There's doing everything for your man because seeing him happy makes you happy. It's another thing to do everything for your man because seeing him happy is safer than him not being happy.
Ivana 5 years ago
This issue is really highlighted when working with women in underdeveloped countries. There are often laws that prohibit women from owning land and the women agree with the laws. Laws and cultures really shape our ideas of what is right and what is wrong so when a culture you grow up in teaches you to belittle yourself or view yourself as less than, do we as the greater society accept that? Do we say it is fine if the women are willing or agree even if their reasoning is that was the way they were raised? On the other hand, there are also issues with belittling someone's culture because you don't agree with their ideas or values. The whole situation is sticky.
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no 5 years ago
Agreed, and I'm not sure why his comment was included as it really has nothing to do with the article. Maybe BP thought "it's not cringey enough, let's throw in something that'll p**s people off"
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Carol Emory 5 years ago
My only concern is not the women that cook and clean for their man or are conservative and cover up...do what you want. But I do have a problem with a woman whose desire to do so comes from a submissive lack of self esteem and that they set themselves up for abusive relationships. There's doing everything for your man because seeing him happy makes you happy. It's another thing to do everything for your man because seeing him happy is safer than him not being happy.
Ivana 5 years ago
This issue is really highlighted when working with women in underdeveloped countries. There are often laws that prohibit women from owning land and the women agree with the laws. Laws and cultures really shape our ideas of what is right and what is wrong so when a culture you grow up in teaches you to belittle yourself or view yourself as less than, do we as the greater society accept that? Do we say it is fine if the women are willing or agree even if their reasoning is that was the way they were raised? On the other hand, there are also issues with belittling someone's culture because you don't agree with their ideas or values. The whole situation is sticky.
Load More Replies... no 5 years ago
Agreed, and I'm not sure why his comment was included as it really has nothing to do with the article. Maybe BP thought "it's not cringey enough, let's throw in something that'll p**s people off"
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