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Someone In This Online Group Asked “Teachers, What Was The Worst Thing You Had To Confiscate From A Student?”, 30 Folks Delivered
For many kids, school is like a second home as they spend so much time there, get to hang out with friends and explore what their interests are. So sometimes they feel so comfortable at school that they forget that it is actually an academic institution and some things should stay at home.
Sometimes kids bring the weirdest things to school they weren't supposed to and teachers have to confiscate them for safety reasons. Reddit user GlytchedTTV wanted to know from teachers “What was the worst thing you had to confiscate from a student?” and there were some surprising answers.
What surprised you the most in this list? Do you have an interesting story that would fit into the thread? Share it with us in the comments and upvote the stories you liked the most.
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I had to confiscate a sea bass from a student who had brought it in to use in the playground at break time...he was walking around slapping people in the face with it and challenging them to a duel..
My mom has had stories about what's she's confiscated from lower elementary aged students (K-3). The usual prank items like woopie cushions, sure. But one time a student was playing with this weird box. The box was locked. So she couldn't put it in the confiscated bin. She put it on top of a cabinet. About an hour later, it starts ringing. Furiously. It took some doing to get the box open.
Turns out, this kid's parent was a professional chef. So the kid had grabbed every timer in the house, set them for the max amount of time, locked the box, brought it to school, and played with it so it would get confiscated and ring loudly. Whole class erupted with laughter and screaming. A true agent of chaos
My teacher took my gold nasa pen I got for my birthday because "it wasn't fair to the other students", I never got it back
My wife is a teacher and one of her first graders brought her 2 hard seltzers because her mom said they’re good after a long day and she deserved them
A chihuahua- a 1st grader had slipped it into his backpack while waiting on the bus to pick him up. Poor thing was just quietly sitting in his backpack that was on a hook in the hallway.
Preschool teacher here. I had to convince a 4 year old that his mom's wedding ring should go into a special box on the front desk instead of on the finger of a six year old girl he had a crush on.
Later he brought in his dad's car keys, and a bottle opener.
My mom told me that a kid in elementary school came to the school with a bag so the teacher took a look and there was a baby in it. The girl wanted to show her friends her little brother. The baby vomited all over himself and the parents didn’t even notice that their 1 week child was missing.
I had to confiscate hand sanitizer from a student who decided to drink it to get drunk and threw up EVERYWHERE.
Once we got confiscated a pineapple that all the boys would worship.
They have renounced Catholicism and are now practicing Pineapplists. They watch a lot of Spongebob.
Not the worst but definitely my favorite. I taught 4th graders and saw a couple of them passing around a sheet of paper to each other instead of doing what they were supposed to be doing. I took the note from them and one of the kids' faces looked as if her life was over and she started crying and begged me not to look at it. I unfolded it to see what they were writing about. The note was filled with drawings of cartoon butts and they told me they wanted to have a contest to see who was the best at drawing butts.
When I taught grade 2 a kid managed to bring a live wild badger in a box. It promply escaped and we had to evacuate while animal control was called. The kid's parents had no idea how he caught a badger, and he never told us where he got it.
Kindergarten, studying butterfly life cycles. Little guy brings in a “chrysalis” he found on the porch of his house. A doobie, the kid brought me a doobie and wanted us to see how long it would take to turn into a butterfly.
Most dangerous: a knife from an 8th grader.
Most annoying: different school than above, but a wifi jammer and a USB killing device from an 8th grader.
Worst thing: bullets. From a first grader. Had to do a room clear to look for a gun.
Best thing: a cat a high school student brought in their backpack, haha.
The cat had better gotten back to its owner (if the cat was part of the kids family, hopefully it was taken back home)
Not a teacher but in 2nd grade I had a clay dinosaur project confiscated from me by the teacher who assigned the project. I think it was because I wouldn’t stop playing with it. I never got it back.
Looking back it makes sense that I couldn’t stop playing with it. I’m a full time ceramic artist.
I think you should have gotten it back. I am old, but even back in those simpler times, when teachers confiscated things you got them back. Sometimes your parents were required to come to school and pick it up, sometimes you had to wait until end of term, but all items were returned.
The weirdest one was definitely the fish in a vase they found during locker checks. It was in an unassigned locker someone had added a lock to. Inside was a live Betta fish in about as large a vase as you can fit in a locker. Fully decorated. Someone had clipped a little book light to the top of the vase presumably so fish wasn't in the dark all the time. No one claimed to know whose if was or how long it had been there so it lived in the coaches office for at least that year.
Ear piercing gun. Had to stop them from piercing each others ears during lunch
I taught 1st grade and confiscated a piece of a broken beer bottle from a 6 yr old. It really surprised me, because he was the sweetest kid. Turns out another classmate asked him to bring a weapon and hide it in the playground sand, so that he could get back at another kid. I tried to do more life lesson things than suspension for both boys, bc they’re freakin 6, but school policy had them both suspended for a few days.
I think the little boy must be the sweetest, to try and help his friend that way, even if it was the wrong way.
A styrofoam head that some boys had drawn a smile on and scooped out some eye holes. It had a name and they took it to every class. It got old and shabby and so did the joke so I put it out of its misery.
Great staff room trophy though
A gorilla mask...yes...dude put it on while my back was turned and facing the board. I laughed like hell then took it for the day until his parents collected it.
A 6 pack of beer from a second grader. In her defense, she was going to share it on the field trip that day.
A Coors Light that the child had mistaken for a Diet Coke. The student was mortified. I just giggled. The principal kept it for “evidence”. He kept it in the refrigerator in his office until it “disappeared” one day.
Once our philosophy teacher got mad and confiscated our recently captured grasshopper because we named him "Aristotle"
I took a teaching job on a high school once, it was a fun optional subject and my students were 15 years old, the only thing I confiscated were one and a half onions.
One of the kids was eating the onions and blasting the girls with his breath. He brought 3 onions to school...
Over the course of years:
Bottle of Vodka 'hidden' in the girls bathroom by 7th graders. "How did you know where to look?" Everyone who came back from the bathroom was drunk so, you're not as sneaky as you think.
Vape "My mom gave it to me for allergies." "So, I'll just give it back to her then." WIDE EYES. "No!!"
Student banging the primers of two 30-06 shells together in class. -- Grab!-- "I just wanted to see if they would go off."
They were banging what sets off rifle ammunition. Just the primers would still bang pretty loud but no bullets would fly
Load More Replies...As a teacher I had the first one happen to me. They were hiding the vodka in the little box where you're supposed to put used tampons. It was actually really clever because a quick check of the bathroom won't uncover it. And who's going to look through used tampons for a bottle?
I was a dumb kid but I valued my fingers. I'd be surprised if this kid lived long enough to reproduce.
This is why you always hide your liquor in the ceiling tiles and only you and a chosen few can know.... Or just premix before you get into school. Thats what I did for my lean
Half pint bottles people. What, did you grow up in Russia or something?
Load More Replies...When a bullet goes off without a rifle barrel to contain the pressure the brass casing will become a gernade and send brass fragment everywhere.
Again, this should not have been accessible to a child. Call the parents or CPS.
A god damn tattoo machine. They were tattooing their hands. (8th grade, Germany)
My mom always told the story about my brother bringing a signed picture of Richard Petty to his class and telling everyone he was his Dad (1-2nd grade maybe) but that everyone forgot because the next kid pulled out an antique gun
Too funny! A co-workers kid started telling his classmates that his father owned the popular BBQ place in town. Told this story for years and had most of the kids convinced. The kids father was actually a car salesman.
Handcuffs and tear gas from the same student, same lesson
I recently confiscated a giant ball of cheese. Kid had like 8 cheese sticks, had unwrapped them, and was forming them into a massive ball of goo. He was about to shove it in his cheese hole when I took it. It had started to melt. I teach 8th grade. Cheese goo.
A tazer disguised as a torch
If you ever needed proof that young people's brains are not fully formed and therefore do not function optimally, this is it. Every time they charge a kid as an adult, I just think about how unfair it is to do this to kids, who are effectively brain-damaged by virtue of not being adults yet.
That depends, sometimes kids know exactly what they're doing.
Load More Replies...This kid in my elementary school, I'm talking a kindergarten student got in trouble because their mom gave them crack to sell out of his lunchbox. It was a big thing in the news.
My brother's friend was suspended sophomore year of high school because he was deploying aerosol fart spray in people's faces. Senior year the same friend was suspended for pooping in a Krispy Kreme box and leaving it outside their math teacher's door, addressed to her.
Similar to one of these, I once heard a soft sound. Tracked it down to a newborn kitten in one kid's backpack.
My teacher once confiscated -you won’t believe this- a real fox skin. Kid’s dad was a hunter. Poor little guy.
As a first grade teacher, I had to confiscate a lot of stuff. Nothing unusual, but I would label anything I took, plop it in a shopping bag...usually had two full ones by June. I would give everything back the last few days of school.
If you ever needed proof that young people's brains are not fully formed and therefore do not function optimally, this is it. Every time they charge a kid as an adult, I just think about how unfair it is to do this to kids, who are effectively brain-damaged by virtue of not being adults yet.
That depends, sometimes kids know exactly what they're doing.
Load More Replies...This kid in my elementary school, I'm talking a kindergarten student got in trouble because their mom gave them crack to sell out of his lunchbox. It was a big thing in the news.
My brother's friend was suspended sophomore year of high school because he was deploying aerosol fart spray in people's faces. Senior year the same friend was suspended for pooping in a Krispy Kreme box and leaving it outside their math teacher's door, addressed to her.
Similar to one of these, I once heard a soft sound. Tracked it down to a newborn kitten in one kid's backpack.
My teacher once confiscated -you won’t believe this- a real fox skin. Kid’s dad was a hunter. Poor little guy.
As a first grade teacher, I had to confiscate a lot of stuff. Nothing unusual, but I would label anything I took, plop it in a shopping bag...usually had two full ones by June. I would give everything back the last few days of school.