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In the past weddings were more viewed as a religious ritual and celebration so it had a more strict format with the things that were supposed to happen. In contemporary times people who are getting married can personalize the fest to their own taste and ditch the parts they don’t feel match their personalities.

Even though weddings now are very different, there are traditions from the past that people still like to include and there are new ones forming. But whether it’s tradition or not, some things at weddings seem just cringey and unnecessary. Such as the ones that Reddit users shared when they were asked, “What in weddings makes you cringe?”

Let us know what would you answer to this question and whether you feel that the things mentioned in the list are true. Also, don’t forget to upvote the submissions that you agree with the most.

More info: Reddit

#1

Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Releasing of doves into the sky....

At my wedding I will release rats into the crowd.

_corbae_ , Joe Green Report

Assuming from the popularity of the answers people in the thread gave, the traditions they mentioned are slowly becoming less popular. The best person to ask if it’s true is the one who plans weddings so Bored Panda reached out to certified wedding planner Ivy Summer, author of Poise Over Panic: How to Plan a Wedding in a Pandemic.

It seems that the clients that Ivy worked with have a similar outlook to what is cringey as in her experience, “Many couples are forgoing the garter removal and garter toss. They either think it doesn't quite suit them as a couple, or they think it's cheesy.”

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    #2

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Smashing the slice of cake in each other's face.

    12thNJ , David Lee Report

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    Justin Jones
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My wife informed me in no uncertain terms that if I smashed cake in her face we were getting an immediate divorce.

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    #3

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings “Ball and chain” jokes. Why tf are you getting married then?

    Geodudette2014 , Thomas Quine Report

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    While there are couples who are certain in what they want to skip, others might think that they need to follow the usual wedding traditions because maybe they feel pressure from parents, friends or society in general, but Ivy will always advise them “to rethink traditions that don't match them as a couple. In fact, I'll encourage them to think of new wedding traditions they want to incorporate that match them as a couple.” Because there aren’t any rules and discovering an individual tradition might be more fun.

    While considering which wedding traditions are worth following for them personally, Ivy's clients like to rethink “the father-daughter dance–they'll often think of incorporating their children (if they have kids already). Another tradition that clients rethink is whether they want to force the garter catcher and the bouquet catcher to dance together (many choose to forgo that altogether).”

    #4

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Garter retrieval horror. Especially if teeth are involved. Cringe af

    FlyBuy3 , Adrian Scottow Report

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    Thegoodboi
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had to do this and I DID NOT want to. Bride and co. thought it'd be funny. I definitely was not comfortable going up my wife's dress head first while her father is shooting eye lasers into my soul..

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    #5

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings As I'm currently planning mine its simply the sheer cost and overcharging of anything wedding based.

    Asked a venue for a quote for just the premises and was told £9000! Phoned back the next day and said it was for a birthday party and exactly the same thing came back as £4500!

    hawkspud , Zach Graves Report

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    #6

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Just recently went to a wedding where the bride and groom were in their early 20s. This is in the U. S. and a progressive state. In the vows the bride said “The man is the head of the household. I will submit to my husband.”

    Pretty cringe.

    CA_catwhispurr , Cara Report

    Despite weddings being so personalized incorporating family traditions or starting new ones, they do have trends and even more so among people who organize the event themselves, “Weddings definitely have trends, especially in the DIY wedding landscape. I notice how they change by flipping through wedding portfolios by wedding planners and sites like Aisle Planner. But the easiest way to see how they change is by asking brides and grooms what they like when it comes to aesthetics, which is often influenced by pop culture (e.g. what you find on Instagram).”

    The nature of a trend is that it doesn’t last too long and isn’t as impactful to become a real tradition that lasts through generations, but there is a trend that Ivy would like to see revived, “I'm not sure when the Cha Cha Slide became a natural wedding tradition, but I think it's one that is absolutely timeless and should never die.”

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    #7

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings When the groom goes up the bride’s skirt in front of all their family. It’s so extremely weird and out of place to me. Like why would you want to do that in front of your parents and grandparents? I really don’t get why that’s even a tradition.

    StyleSavage , Paula Satijn Report

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    Rodive95
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What? I don’t really understand. Do they like look up the skirt or…

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    #8

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings All the old people making comments about all the sex the couple is about to have.

    Santos_L_Halper_II , Witches Falls Cottages Report

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    #9

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings In my country it's the amount of people present in the wedding, there are weddings where they call like 500-1000 people, lot of them are family members and friends they have not met in years or decades. To provide food to these people many will go in debt. It makes me cringe so hard like why f*****g throw away your life savings like this? I believe court marriage is the best but if you still want invite people then 50-60 (close friends & family members are enough). I personally will just invite like 15-20 people I genuinely care about, take them to some nice resturant for dinner and be done with it.

    secondhand_bra , r deangelo Report

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    Shyla Bouche
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd have 6 human invitees, 3 of whom have a spouse, so that's nine humans and a cat.

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    Are there any wedding traditions that you would like to see making a come-back? Do you think the couple should consider what their guests would enjoy and not include things that might make them feel uncomfortable? Or would you say that as it’s the couple’s celebration, they can do whatever they want? Let us know your thoughts in the comments!

    #10

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Bettas (or any fish) used as centrepieces

    anon , Faris Algosaibi Report

    #11

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings The jealous mother in law. They always do something to make me cringe. They wear a white dress, pretend to be the boss at the wedding, take a lot of the attention etc.

    mompieB , .Martin. Report

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    Lene
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was at a wedding where the bride's sister desperately fought to be the center of attraction. It was so weird. The bride already had a pretty tense relationship with the sister but it seems that the wedding made it so the bride told her parents that she does not wish to see her sister again. She simply had enough.

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    #12

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings The trend of wanting the women in the wedding party to look alike, even to the point of asking them to change their hair color. Along with that goes giving specific directions as to what guests may wear.

    Comfortable-Salt3132 , Jason Powers Report

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    bElLa sTairZz
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    some directions can be good, as long as its relatively vague. Such as asking for toned down colours or no white

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    #13

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings When the bride and groom are musicians. Get ready for an hour of a couple singing s***tty covers of overrated love songs to each other.

    Silver-Toe4231 , Jennifer Morrow Report

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    Theo Blackwood
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Disagree. Went to friends wedding, both trad musicians. Bride composed her entrance music. Both families brought their instruments and performed at the end of the ceremony, ended up going slightly viral in the country.

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    #14

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings When there are multiple unruly kids running around and/or screaming spoiling the first dance or any special moments for the couple.

    ChickenBootty , kgroovy Report

    #15

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings When the bride or groom does something disrespectful like smashing their nose into the cake. Or writing "help me" on the bottom of the groom's shoes.
    They say one in three marriages ends in divorce, guess this will be one of them.

    Proof_Bathroom_3902 , Kurt Nordstrom Report

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    Strings
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Was at the wedding of a handicapped man: completely bound to a wheelchair, and very limited use of his hands. Bride smashed cake in his face... all his male friends returned the favor, with interest and handling fees...

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    #16

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings those women that try way too hard to catch the bouquet that the bride throws. some literally to the point of pushing others over. i feel embarrassed just watching them lol.

    peacchieee , Wade Treichler Report

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    #17

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Here in the middle east the cringe part is definitely the fireworks

    What I mean by fireworks is our special fireworks the AK-47 to the air kinda stuff countless lives were lost because of falling bullets many laws were put to stop it yet in every wedding you have this monkey that pulls the weapon and just starts spraying bullets everywhere

    Dark_solder18 , Nigel Howe Report

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    Thegoodboi
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait till you come to a wedding around here and we have target practice during the wedding 🤦‍♂️

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    #18

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings The guests who have no respect for the people working on there. I work as a waiter on all kind of weddings and I've met a lot of people that treated me and my coworkers like trash just because we are doing our job. A few weeks ago I saw how some of the guests stole a special plate of jamón specially made for the bride and groom, and when a coworker tried to take the plate back, the guy who stole it threatened to sue him.

    Lower-Ad461 , @joefoodie Report

    #19

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Ohhhhhh boy do I have a f*****g LIST. Where to begin?

    1. Writing your vows in such a way that you essentially air your dirty laundry in front of everyone, almost to the point of admitting that you constantly fight.

    2. Garter toss - this is disgusting and awkward as f**k

    3. Overly drunk groomsmen/bridesmaids. Especially if it’s during the ceremony.

    4. Overly drunk groom/bride

    5. If it’s clear the groom/bride had sex in the middle of the reception.

    6. Any jokes about a man’s life being over bc he’s married now.

    7. Oversharing during speeches.

    8. Grinding on the dance floor.

    Any-Low9727 , Ruth E Photos Report

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    Justin Jones
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "...and I know we fight constantly - and there was that one time when I caught you with Cindy.... and Bob - but I love you with all of my heart!!!!"

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    #20

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings The obsession of everything being “perfect”
    The cost of everything.

    But my biggest cringe moment is the blatantly obvious grabs for cash from the couple.
    Bridal showers,
    Bachelor and bachelorette parties,
    Gifts at the wedding,
    Wishing wells,
    Dollar dances,
    “Kidnapping” the bride for a ransom,
    The Gift registry,
    The Honeymoon registry,

    I’ve even been invited to a “pre wedding BBQ” which was potluck and they sold tickets to it and gifts were expected. When I asked the bride what the deal was she said she was trying to figure out who would give them the most expensive gifts so she could invite them to the wedding. It was gross.

    squeephish , Salicia Report

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    Monika
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    WTF IS THE "KIDNAPPING" OF THE BRIDE???? I LIVE IN THE USA AND I'VE NEVER HEARD OF THAY BEFORE 😭

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    #21

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings When the priest takes weird tangents to evangelize for 20 minutes -.-

    GenericUsername19892 , shankar s. Report

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    Strings
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As an officiant, I refuse to do this. When I did my first ceremony, I actually had it scripted "now I'm supposed to drone on about morals, and taking care of each-other, and all that. But you already KNOW this stuff, so we'll skip that part"

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    #22

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Any wedding where the bridesmaids and groomsmen have been ordered to perform a choreographed dance at any point during the festivities whether that's dancing up the aisle or a full on dance number during the reception.

    ritan7471 , Ashley Rehnblom Report

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    Ripley
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I dunno - I saw a vid of a wedding party doing the Thriller dance on YouTube (or something) once - it was awesome.

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    #23

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Disney themed anything

    lesbunner , Walt Disney Television Report

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    Lisa H
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it's subtle, sure, like maybe a Mickey and Minnie cake topper might be cute if the couple is into Disney. But my opinion is to keep it simple. Not trying to bash on Disney fans, this is just my own opinion.

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    #24

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings The oneupmanship, and having the most Instagramable wedding

    Galmeister , simply fragile Report

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    EP
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🤮 no one cares once it’s over and now you’re out all that money. I don’t care what you received for gift money. No one recouped what they spent.

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    #25

    The bride being "given away" by a male relative.

    I get that we have whitewashed it and some people may not realise it, but the whole concept is not chivalrous at all. Its about the patriarch of the family literally giving the chattel he owns to another man. Literally a property exchange.

    Not romantic in the slightest.

    Obsidian-Winter Report

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    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I understand that we should not forget history, and traditions are rooted in history, but they EVOLVE with us as human beings, and they evolve with changes in our cultures. Saying that "giving the bride away" equates to the historical patriarchal practice of "men own their daughters/female relatives" - we might as well axe Christmas too, since it is based on pagan rituals/holidays, etc. Things change. We change as human beings. "Giving away the bride" now (in most countries) is just that - a dad/close male relative symbolically being present for the bride in her wedding, supporting her, and showing his love for her.

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    #26

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings When people write their own vows but they don’t actually promise anything. They just ramble for a few minutes about how much they love the other and how perfect they are. Like the whole point of wedding vows is to make commitments.

    livingdream111 , Sage Ross Report

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    Shelby Moonheart
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It is a binding vow. Commitments are a part of that vow and legal contract. If not, why get married?

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    #27

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Having a wedding for the sake of getting married. I had a friend from high school who got pregnant at like 20/21. The only reason she had a wedding with baby daddy is because she was pregnant. I knew that the marriage wouldn't last. It didn't but she is happily married to her second husband and has been for a few years.

    arandomlibrarian , Parekh Cards Report

    #28

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings I went to a wedding the other night where each member of the wedding party had their own theme song like at a baseball game, as they walked down the aisle. The bride walked down the aisle to another one bites the dust.

    AgileHistorian268 , Lauri Rantala Report

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    Phred
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've heard of it during the Ring Cycle, but there it was called a leitmotif.

    J
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We walked back down the aisle after the wedding to "you're my best friend" by Queen 😊

    Noyfb noyfb
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I attended a wedding in which the bride chose “Pavane for a Dead Princess.” True story. It didn’t last.

    Debby Keir
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I married my father walked me down the aisle to Pachelbel's canon. When my youngest married I walked her down the aisle (she hadn't told what she had chosen) it was JerryC's Canon rock. Very moving.

    Hey!
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hum, were we at the same wedding??? I just went last weekend; I still have my French braids.

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    #29

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings So. Many. Ed. Sheeran. Songs.

    emojicatcher997 , Harald Krichel Report

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    Janice Bontrager
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What’s wrong with ed Sheeran songs? I love ed Sheeran songs! ❤️💕❤️💕

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    #30

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings That part when a priest asks if anyone knows a reason for those two not to marry and everyone pretends they didn’t hear the question.

    that_stanley , Dave Bezaire Report

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    Strings
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I DO put this part in, but phrased slightly differently: "if anyone has any reason that X and Y should not be married, please stand so they have a clear shot at you"

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    #31

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings When they make the person announce everyone in the wedding party as they walk into the hotel banquet room like it’s a Las Vegas boxing match. “ oh you’re the 8th best man. Great, great”.

    TheRedMarin , Joel Olives Report

    #32

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Guests who take pictures of the ceremony with a f*****g iPad.

    fart_fig_newton , Michael Coghlan Report

    #33

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Too many bride's maids, why do they do that?

    Faepty , Ronnie Macdonald Report

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    madbakes
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If a woman wants to be surrounded all day by her best girls, what's the problem?

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    #34

    Folks Online Get Second-Hand Embarrassment When They See These 35 Things At Weddings Well not an American custom but an Indian one where after the wedding there is a custom called 'vidaai' meaning separation for some sort in this bride and her goddamn whole family cries because she is leaving I'm like then why are you marrying anyway when y'll just wanna cry about it.

    AlterDynamic , Aleksandar Cocek Report

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    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I feel like OP is missing the emotional, symbolic aspect of this one. I would not dare to presume about OP's emotional maturity, but this particular post seems like immature complaining about something they "don't get" and don't WANT to try to understand.

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    #35

    Always thought the big lavish wedding thing was dumb and kinda cringe


    Then I had a lavish romantic wedding for me and my husband I instantly understood

    PhysicianTradition Report