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“Groom’s Mother Left In Tears”: Wedding Guests Left Segregated Over Wealth At Reception
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“Groom’s Mother Left In Tears”: Wedding Guests Left Segregated Over Wealth At Reception

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The menu is a key element of a wedding. Keeping the guests well fed and watered is essential and sharing a delicious meal together allows couples to express gratitude and form deeper connections over food. However, all the canapés, main courses, and desserts can quickly add up, which tempts some people to cut corners, and not always in the most considerate of ways.

This guest recently shared how they received smaller portions of food and drinks than the rest at a wealthy family’s wedding. Considering that it was a “no expenses spared” event, such an unpleasant experience really didn’t sit well with them, pushing them to share it online. 

Food is an essential part of a wedding that can quickly drain the couple’s budget

Image credits: Nathan Cowley (not the actual photo)

This couple thought they would save some bucks by serving less food and drinks to ‘less wealthy guests’

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Image credits: Pixabay (not the actual photo)

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Image credits: gew114

62% of couples believe that food is a worthy expense

Many would argue that memorable food and drinks are a worthy wedding expense. In fact, 62% of couples said that catering was the most important part of their planning process, and 75% believed that spending more on memorable menu items ensured their guests were taken care of and had a good time. 

Not only does food have the potential to make the guests feel taken care of and give them something to converse about, but it can also be a great way to add a unique and personal touch to the celebration. 

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“The food program at your wedding is a wonderful place to showcase the things that you love as a couple,” says wedding planner Tory Smith. “We’re often asked about the best ways to make a wedding feel unique and ‘like us’ and food is a fantastic touchpoint to do so.”

Even though it’s an essential part of a wedding, the catering bill is the second biggest wedding expense, with the venue being in the lead. According to The Knot 2023 Real Weddings Study, the average cost of food at such celebrations was $85 per person. If it’s a small, intimate celebration with 30 people, the couple should set aside around $2,550 for catering alone. For bigger weddings with 100 or more people, the cost range starts at $8,500.

The price also has the potential to grow depending on the number of invitees, the venue, and the celebration and food type. Couples tend to spend significantly more on guests when they throw domestic and international celebrations, bringing up the average to $102 per person. 

It’s important to thoroughly think about which corners to cut and how it will impact the guest experience

Luckily, there are ways to have a more budget-friendly celebration. However, it’s important to think thoroughly about which corners to cut and what impact it will have on the guest experience. If the couple chooses to remove courses or options to stay within their means, Matthew Shaw, founder and creative director of Sauveur, recommends doing this later in the evening, not in the beginning. “Wedding days involve an early start for everyone, not just the couple, and it can be a while before people have something to eat or drink,” he says.

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Therefore, generous canapés and dinner should be non-negotiable. Meanwhile, big wedding cakes and cheese stations (even though wonderful additions) can be quite unnecessary and wasteful. 

For the main course, the couple can choose between a plated or feasting dinner. When it comes to price, both are similar options. One way to save on substantial meals is to have a longer drink and canapés reception instead of a starter. “This gives guests plenty of time to mingle and enjoy lots of delicious canapés. You can then seat everyone for the more formal part of the evening, while keeping your dinner shorter,” explains Shaw.

Something else that can save a few bucks is basing the menu around local and in-season products. Not only is this budget-friendly, but it’s also good for the environment. Some catering companies even offer lower prices for couples who opt for plant-based and more sustainable menus. 

The traditional wedding cake can also be reimagined as doughnut towers, a croquembouche, or cupcakes, as they tend to be a much cheaper option. “Alternatively, a champagne tower instead of a cake is also a great option—and will give guests an extra drink to save money at the bar,” adds wedding coordinator Tracey James-Heyes. 

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These subtle changes can definitely save a pretty penny on food costs and simultaneously ensure that the guests aren’t negatively impacted by them.

The author cleared up some things in the comments

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Readers were appalled by the unequal treatment of the wedding guests

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Austeja Zokaite

Austeja Zokaite

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Hi, glad you swung by! My name is Austėja, and I’m a writer at Bored Panda. With a degree in English philology, I’m interested in all aspects of language. Being fresh out of university, my mission is to master the art of writing and add my unique touch to every personal story and uplifting article we publish. In my time here, I’ve covered some fun topics such as scrungy cats and pareidolia, as well as more serious ones about mental health and relationship hiccups. When I’m not on my laptop, you’ll probably find me devouring pastries, especially croissants, paired with a soothing cup of tea. Sunsets, the sea, and swimming are some of my favorite things.

Read less »
Austeja Zokaite

Austeja Zokaite

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Hi, glad you swung by! My name is Austėja, and I’m a writer at Bored Panda. With a degree in English philology, I’m interested in all aspects of language. Being fresh out of university, my mission is to master the art of writing and add my unique touch to every personal story and uplifting article we publish. In my time here, I’ve covered some fun topics such as scrungy cats and pareidolia, as well as more serious ones about mental health and relationship hiccups. When I’m not on my laptop, you’ll probably find me devouring pastries, especially croissants, paired with a soothing cup of tea. Sunsets, the sea, and swimming are some of my favorite things.

Ieva Pečiulytė

Ieva Pečiulytė

Author, BoredPanda staff

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I'm a Visual Editor for Bored Panda. I’m also an analog collage artist. My love for images and experience in layering goes well with both creating collages by hand and working with digital images as an Editor. When I’m not using my kitchen area as an art studio I also do various experiments making my own cosmetics or brewing kombucha. When I’m not at home you would most definitely find me attending a concert or walking my dog.

Read less »

Ieva Pečiulytė

Ieva Pečiulytė

Author, BoredPanda staff

I'm a Visual Editor for Bored Panda. I’m also an analog collage artist. My love for images and experience in layering goes well with both creating collages by hand and working with digital images as an Editor. When I’m not using my kitchen area as an art studio I also do various experiments making my own cosmetics or brewing kombucha. When I’m not at home you would most definitely find me attending a concert or walking my dog.

Shelly Fourer

Shelly Fourer

Author, BoredPanda staff

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Hey there! I'm Shelly, a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. When I'm not working, you'll often find me immersed in creativity, whether it's creating animations, 3D and traditional art, writing, or making music.I've been drawing since I was little, and my passion for visual storytelling really took off after I finished a 2-year Film Academy. It ignited my existing spark for bringing stories to life through visuals. Since then, I've been diving deeper into art and tech, always exploring new ways to tell compelling stories.

Read less »

Shelly Fourer

Shelly Fourer

Author, BoredPanda staff

Hey there! I'm Shelly, a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. When I'm not working, you'll often find me immersed in creativity, whether it's creating animations, 3D and traditional art, writing, or making music.I've been drawing since I was little, and my passion for visual storytelling really took off after I finished a 2-year Film Academy. It ignited my existing spark for bringing stories to life through visuals. Since then, I've been diving deeper into art and tech, always exploring new ways to tell compelling stories.

How would you have felt if you were treated differently at a wedding based on wealth?
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Hodge Elmwood
Community Member
1 month ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That one stupid comment about complaining about free food.. What food??

V
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Most of our wedding money went to feeding guests the best we could and have a few hundy on the bar. There was so much food that by the time we got to cake people only wanted enough to taste it, so we had cake in the freezer and chipped away at it for a year. Luckily it was one that froze well. I haven't been to a wedding that I haven't ended up being starving at and didn't want to do that to our guests.

Ace
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's traditional, or at least it used to be, for UK wedding cakes to be made in tiers, usually of fruit cake covered in Royal Icing, which will keep for ever, particularly if there's an entire uncut tier. It would often then serve a second purpose for the first baby's christening.

Load More Replies...
Alexandra
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, segregation at the dinner table! Someone should be too ashamed to show their face in public after this and crawl back under the rock he came from.

Load More Comments
Hodge Elmwood
Community Member
1 month ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That one stupid comment about complaining about free food.. What food??

V
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Most of our wedding money went to feeding guests the best we could and have a few hundy on the bar. There was so much food that by the time we got to cake people only wanted enough to taste it, so we had cake in the freezer and chipped away at it for a year. Luckily it was one that froze well. I haven't been to a wedding that I haven't ended up being starving at and didn't want to do that to our guests.

Ace
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's traditional, or at least it used to be, for UK wedding cakes to be made in tiers, usually of fruit cake covered in Royal Icing, which will keep for ever, particularly if there's an entire uncut tier. It would often then serve a second purpose for the first baby's christening.

Load More Replies...
Alexandra
Community Member
1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, segregation at the dinner table! Someone should be too ashamed to show their face in public after this and crawl back under the rock he came from.

Load More Comments
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