Vegan Bacon Drives Family Apart And Leaves Woman Conflicted Whether She Should Apologize

Even if you get along perfectly with your partner, it doesn’t mean that you’ll hit it off with their family.

Reddit user Background_Egg7703 thought she had found common ground with her boyfriend’s relatives. However, after she went vegan, a conflict arose with his stepdad during one dinner over their diets. It quickly blew out of proportion, putting stress on their relationship.

In a post on the subreddit ‘Am I the [Jerk]?‘ she shared that it got to a point where she no longer knows who is to blame for all of this. Her story illustrates just how important it is to try and stay empathetic towards the people around you.

This woman went vegan and everything seemed fine until one dinner with her in-laws

Vegan Bacon Drives Family Apart And Leaves Woman Conflicted Whether She Should Apologize

Image credits: Mariana Medvedeva (not the actual photo)

During it, she and her stepdad-in-law got into an argument in front of everyone about meat eating

Vegan Bacon Drives Family Apart And Leaves Woman Conflicted Whether She Should Apologize

Image credits: Cocobols (not the actual photo)

Vegan Bacon Drives Family Apart And Leaves Woman Conflicted Whether She Should Apologize

Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

Vegan Bacon Drives Family Apart And Leaves Woman Conflicted Whether She Should Apologize

Image credits: jm_video (not the actual photo)

Vegan Bacon Drives Family Apart And Leaves Woman Conflicted Whether She Should Apologize

Image credits: Background_Egg7703

Sometimes it seems that vegans and meat eaters have an inherent contempt for one another

Dr. Matt Ruby is a professor at La Trobe University who specializes in the psychology of food choices. He thinks that situations like this one are somewhat common.

“Some people on both sides are very determined to take things personally,” Ruby told Insider.

Recently, the term “vegan” has itself been subject to controversy, as more people opting out of animal products choose to identify as “plant-based” instead to avoid stigma and cultural baggage attached to veganism.

Part of the reason why these conversations are so confrontational is that there is a lot of politics involved.

According to Ruby, food choices reflect not only deep divides in culture and ethics but also shared anxieties about our collective future and identities.

Both sides usually argue that their way is the most natural way for humans to eat

A common argument for (or against) meat-eating is based on how humans evolved, and whether we were meant to be herbivores or omnivores based on our biology and physiology.

When most people argue about dietary choices, they tend to focus on basic principles known as the 4 Ns — natural, normal, necessary, and nice. This means that omnivores look for evidence that meat-eating is ancestrally or biologically appropriate for humans, that it’s important and accepted in our culture, that we need meat (or plant-based) diets for optimal health, and that it’s just plain enjoyable and giving it up would be unpleasant.

In reality, there is no concrete evidence that either a plant-based or omnivorous diet is superior to the other. Most nutritionists and medical experts agree that a balanced diet of mainly whole foods is a healthy way to eat, whether or not that includes some animal products.

While red meat and processed meat have been scrutinized for their role in chronic disease, poultry, seafood, and cheese are generally regarded as fine, as long as they’re consumed in moderation.

It’s important to note that a natural, or ancestral, approach to dieting isn’t necessarily the ideal either.

“I don’t find that particularly helpful — natural doesn’t mean better,” Ruby said. “Earthquakes are natural, black plague was natural.”

Beyond personal preference, however, what we eat does matter for how we perceive ourselves, and how we want other people to perceive us; our diet is a component of our identity.

Hopefully, Background_Egg7703 and her step-dad-in-law as well as the rest of us find a way to sit peacefully at the table.

As people started reacting to the woman’s story, she joined the discussion in the comments section

Vegan Bacon Drives Family Apart And Leaves Woman Conflicted Whether She Should Apologize

Many said that she did nothing wrong

Vegan Bacon Drives Family Apart And Leaves Woman Conflicted Whether She Should Apologize

But some believe that everyone involved could’ve handled things better

Vegan Bacon Drives Family Apart And Leaves Woman Conflicted Whether She Should Apologize

Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

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As a Visual Editor at Bored Panda, I indulge in the joy of curating delightful content, from adorable pet photos to hilarious memes, all while nurturing my wanderlust and continuously seeking new adventures and interests—sometimes thrilling, sometimes daunting, but always exciting!

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What do you think ?

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Zedrapazia 1 year ago

I was full on ready to say NTA, it's ridiculous to make such a fuss about vegan food (I myself don't particularly like it, but when with a vegan friend I'll eat it nonetheless), but she's not truthfully translating the German words right. Leichenteile is not body parts (that would be Körperteile), it would mean corpse pieces, and Leiche is also not just body, but corpse. Overall, the word tone is therefore much more aggressive and the used language also more judgemental, so I can see why the in-laws found this a bit unappealing. I still think the whole thing is blown out of proportion, but I'd have gotten annoyed too if I ate some meat and someone comes around to tell me I'm devouring corpse pieces.

55points

Mary Lou 1 year ago (edited)

More over the word for dead animal corpse in German is "Kadaver". The words "Leiche" or "Leichenteile" are only ever used for human bodys. In other word's: OP used a wrong word on purpose making it sound like FIL was basically a cannibal. I got lots of vegan friends and I got to say if they felt the need to guilt trip me like that, I'd be pissed off too.

30points

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jaina m 1 year ago

Came here to comment on this exact point. Glad the point was made already. The fact she translated both the words wrong or at least in a shady manner, leads me to believe, she might have also left out some of her behaviour in this situation. This would explain much more plausible why FIL wants her to apologize and also why Bf thinks she should. So I was going to say, ESH, because there simply was no need for an escalation or even a debate. But the more I think about the dishonest translation, the more I am willing to say YTA. OP and Bf could have avoided all of this by simply bringing real vegan food, like fruits, to the table instead of meat substitute products. If OP finds meat to be Leichenteile why even buy food that mimics being a dead animal to start with. IMO FIL has a valid point in this and although his comment was a bit out of place, I don't agree that it was disrespectful to her since he was simply expressing an opinon on industrial substitue products and wasn't attacking

9points

Sponge Blob 1 year ago

Best to accept we're devouring corpse pieces and laugh at their futile attempts to be judgemental. While I wholeheartedly have nothing against vegans and support lab meat industry growing, I'm fully aware what I'm eating and they might as well call me a ghoul and see if I care :)

2points

DC 4 months ago

But, in this case, she didn't come around, but responded to him being aggressive. If that doesn't make a crucial difference, then, what does, even? Aggression here is, once again, stemming from the meat eating part that has the obnoxability to even ask for an apology? Yeah, as someone said - an apology goes a long way. In reinforcing.

0points

David Wishengrad Exorcist, 1st class 1 year ago (edited)

it's not judgmental to say that a body part is body part. it's an observation. It's always best to not judge others and let them judge themselves. Just share with them the truth "Life is Most Important in Life is The Most Important Truth in Life". Once that truth has been shared with another they now really have the authority to judge themselves guilty of eternal soullessness. If they don't responsibly publicly affirm that that truth is correct and claim to represent life's truthful interests anyway and you witness it, then you have witnessed a person judging themselves guilty of eternal soullessness. The possibility of that person ever having genuine honest heart, soul and integrity is gone for them forever and they can never be properly trusted with life of any kind ever again. Not their own or even a bug. There are no do-overs for getting shared this truth for the first time. Please judge well.

-3points

David Wishengrad Exorcist, 1st class 1 year ago (edited)

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David Wishengrad Exorcist, 1st class 1 year ago (edited)

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sturmwesen 1 year ago

While DIL seems like a handfull OP seems unnecessary confrontational. Leichenteile suggests a lot of guilt tripping and a holier than thou attitude. A simple "we wanted vegan options you can either eat them or eat the non vegan option, we wont force you" would be enough.

22points

DC 1 year ago

... you can get sick of being the polite one in a purposefully hostile environment. There is that type of meat eater who takes the burden of making every place they attend hostile to any vegetarian or even vegan, who tells the same old unfunny jokes that haven't changed since 30 years, and declares every vegan food even hardly resembling anything that may be made out of meat "unnecessary" - "Why make vegan sausage? There already IS sausage!". They spill their wisdoms about any and every option we get, but, although hating strawberries, never take objection that another kind of strawberry icecream is introduced. Being polite among them, at some point, evolves into self-denial. They have it coming at times, like SFIL here.

1point

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PFD 1 year ago

When you get into a values-based disagreement with someone and then choose to use the most laden language, of course it's going to escalate, and that's on you. You might think it's just accurate language, but that's (in the logical sense) question-begging. It's like someone referring to killing unborn children in an abortion debate - it reflects what they think is the reality but obviously makes it clear you think the other person's choices are foul. Of course that's likely to cause offence and it's disingenuous to be upset when it does. And that goes double if the person you're talking to is an a*****e already looking for a reason to be offended. It's not about whether *they're* an a*****e, that's not something you can control.

19points

Jessica Bertram 1 year ago

i tthink this is the best snalysis.

2points

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David Wishengrad Exorcist, 1st class 1 year ago (edited)

If a person does not agree that "Life is Most Important in Life is The Most Important Truth in Life", then they do not honestly care about life and do not have any sort of legitimate ethics and morals. As those are truths and all truths do depend on life being truthfully most important to then be true themselves. If they are a person who is themselves claiming to represent life's truthful interests and do not and then claim to represent life's truthful interests anyway, they will lose any possibility of ever having genuine ethics and morals going forward forever. Weed out the fraud with the Truth of the Importance of Life itself. Just because a person does not needlessly eat animals and claims to care about them does not mean that that really do honestly care about the animals. To say the fraud in animal activism is rampant is one of the biggest understatements ever made. Verganism is the sauce of Lucifer. It has nothing at all to do with why loving the animals is true.

-3points