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50 People Who Had Someone Else’s Back Online And Did It In The Most Wholesome Way (New Pics)
Interview
It can be satisfying to see a niche thing you love – a book, a band, an artist – become popular in the mainstream. Yet it can also be upsetting. You root for their success for so long, but once everybody knows about them, it doesn't feel as special. That's gatekeeping, the grown-up cousin of "You can't sit with us."
But there is a community that doesn't gatekeep: the Gates Open, Come In subreddit. It's where people invite each other to like and enjoy stuff others might tell them is inappropriate or uncool, and generally have each other's backs. Like the kids say these days, "In the clurb, we all fam."
Bored Panda got in touch with one of the community's moderators, u/Merari01, and they kindly agreed to tell us more about the subreddit. Read our short chat with them below!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
If Anybody Has A Problem With That I'm Going To Let It Go
u/Merari01 told us that the theme of the subreddit drew them to become one of the moderators for the community. "The internet can be a negative place, full of angry people and content, which in some form makes people feel excluded," they told us via a message. "This subreddit is positive, inclusive, and shows a welcoming atmosphere."
The Redditor believes that people want their feeds to have more positivity. "Having a space that is explicitly inclusionary resonates with a lot of them," the netizen added. While moderating the subreddit's comment section can sometimes be challenging when members get into petty arguments, u/Merari01 is pretty happy with the job overall. "It's a fun space to be in, so, it's not a real challenge."
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#2
Inclusion
#3
Dogs And Cats My Favorite Animals
We can gatekeep many things: the recipe for our favorite pasta, where we bought our fabulous shoes, our favorite sports teams, and many other things. In 2022, Vogue actually chose "gatekeep" as the word of the year. What, according to them, used to mean institutions or people withholding power now means not sharing information or access to something.
On TikTok, not gatekeeping means sharing where you got that sweater from and how much your tickets to see Taylor Swift cost. But Vogue writes that this is slightly ironic: if anything, the app made information and the world itself more accessible than ever. "Want to find out where a media-only fashion party or sample sale preview is taking place? You can probably hunt down the invite on TikTok."
#4
Finally Someone Who Gets It!
#5
Happy Lunar Year Everyone
Robert Trebor 2 weeks ago
Someone with authority setting an example for self-styled dictators. Bravo.
Licensed psychologist and lecturer on the psychology of metal and punk rock Steve Byrne explains that social psychologists have observed our tendency to divide into groups. We make friends with people who have similar interests and outlooks on life, and we align ourselves against those who are different.
Byrne points to the Robbers Cave experiment, carried out in the 1950s. In it, social psychologist Muzafer Sherif studied 22 boys who, during the experiment, divided themselves into in and out-groups. It reflected the most basic truth that we divide ourselves according to many things: political beliefs, likes and dislikes, and even for the benefit of our own social standing.
#7
Everything Turned Out Just Fine, Then
#8
It's Never Too Late
#9
Struggle Has No Inherent Value
Byrne writes that it's natural for us to see those who are different from us as a threat. Then we want to appear stronger, more sophisticated, and cooler in front of them. And that's where gatekeeping comes in. In essence, we gatekeep because we're insecure. Putting others down is one of the ways we cope with insecurities. "At least we're not as bad as them," we comfort ourselves.
#10
Literally The Gate Was Open
#11
Mentally Empathetic Dad
#12
Brooklyn Librarians Subverting Censorship & Allowing Any Teenager In America To Have A Library Card
Mochi 2 weeks ago
In my town there's a new library with a room with access to free wifi, coding programs, a 3-d printer, and of course e-books, books, C-ds, and audiobooks. There's also a genealogy center so you can trace your heritage and a teen room with games and crafts. There's also private study rooms, and conference rooms, and there's classes for everything imaginable. And it's all free with a library card!
Perhaps now more than ever, division into insiders and outsiders is hurting us all around the world. Byrne suggests that some political leaders thrive on sowing division with the "us against them" mentality. In reality, there must be very little that's actually different about us.
#13
What An Adorable Man Doing Such A Lovely Thing ❤️😍🥰
quentariel 2 weeks ago
Amigurumi in this size and complexity takes a lot of time. This man is not only thoughtful and kind but also really skilled.
#14
It Got A Little Aggressive, But I Like The Message
MicrowaveGoddess 2 weeks ago
I'm Indian and 100% approve of this message. Culture is something to be shared, no kept exclusive.
#15
For The Waiters
Julia Mckinney 2 weeks ago
The above reason plus I used to work the same type of jobs and know how hard it can be.
"Those who are seemingly kept out by these gatekeepers might be seeing the gate as some hulking castle drawbridge, sealed up tight and ready to defend a kingdom against marauders when it’s really just a broken garden fence, easily stepped over," Byrne writes.
#16
Just Let Them Be They
#17
Stress Relief
Kise Miarse 2 weeks ago
I really thought that as a grown a*s adult I wouldn't encounter this so much anymore. LET PEOPLE LIKE THINGS. It doesn't mean it has to become your obsession - you can still enjoy something just for what it is.
#18
Friendly Incentive
Interestingly, some people see gatekeeping as a good thing. In an article for The Cut, Ann Friedman suggests that some communities gatekeep to preserve their culture. She writes about Anthony Bourdain worrying about sending tourist masses to mom-and-pop restaurants, as well as Black creators feeling conflicted when white creators use their aesthetics, language, and memes and calling it appropriation.
#19
Every Job Is Valid!
Beak Hookage 2 weeks ago
I went to an expensive private school and can tell you for a fact that quite a few of the other kids ultimately went to trade school instead of university. And are now gainfully employed. (Ironically, I got three degrees and am currently... not employed).
#20
Shout Out To The Solo Eaters
HighNMightyBigshotBossOfWorld 2 weeks ago
I don’t understand how people don’t do what they want to do because they don’t have someone to do it with. They lose so much.
#21
Emotional Rollercoaster! (Pls Remove If Posted Before)
Did I say that out loud? (he/him)cis/het 2 weeks ago
*Hoping the neighbours don't notice the suspiciously green patches *
Kelly Elizabeth Wright, a lexicographer with the American Dialect Society, explained that gatekeeping in this context gives minorities back that little bit of power they lose in this age of vast media consumption. "You could be making a piece of content that is for other Black people or for your community, but then it's public or it gets algorithmically exposed. There is less control in the way social media is surfaced and served to people."
#22
Luke Skywalker Makes Young Star Wars Fan Feel Loved
#23
Depression Gateopening
Sergy Yeltsen 2 weeks ago
People at work wouldn't think I have MDD. It's easy to hide while others are around. It's when I'm home by myself that it comes to the fore. This is a perception that needs to change.
#24
That's His Whole Thing
Sirena Bergman writes for Business Insider that the boom in tourism in Hawaii during the pandemic caused native Hawaiians and Pacific Islanders to "gatekeep" the state. The natives talked about the rise of COVID-19 cases and the environmental impacts of tourism and asked people not to travel there, but still faced backlash.
#25
You're Not A Machine. You're Garden
#26
Moms,,,/-
Pandemonium 2 weeks ago
I would have been able to finish the butter if they hadn't ganged up on me
#27
You Don't Have To Be Good At Something To Enjoy Doing It
Kise Miarse 2 weeks ago
I need more upvotes to give. When I was younger, so many things I enjoyed were ruined by other people's negative reactions. We're not all born being perfect at everything. Let others enjoy. Let them learn. Don't be a d*ck.
Iridian 2 weeks ago (edited)
A lot of life's problems would be solved if people just wouldn't be d*cks and let other people live lives in their own lanes the way they want to.
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LonelyLittleLeafSheep 2 weeks ago
Hubby and son always ask why I only play video games on easy, even when I'm really good at it. And my response is that it's supposed to be fun, and putting it on "survival mode" takes all the fun away for me.
ABC no seven FCK CENSORING 2 weeks ago
"Always sing like you're in the shower" - it was only recently that I heard that one, but after a little pondering, I decided that there's some deep truth in the sentence, so I follow it as much and as often as I can ^.^
Captain Grump 2 weeks ago
I write songs, and while not famous for it I've made a few albums and play live shows a lot. More than a few times, I've had fellow musicians ask for tips on the songwriting process, and my advice is always the same: "Write a bad song." There's an amazing freedom in letting go of expectations, and just enjoying the process. If some days that means you're writing a song with clumsy lyrics and predictable melody, so be it. And the funny thing is, embracing the act of writing a "bad song" has often led me to writing songs I'm ultimately happy with, and are well received by audiences.
Nichole Harris 2 weeks ago
I love this!!! I love to sing I sound like a large cat in a wood chipper....I sing anyway LMFAO
KittyGaming 2 weeks ago
Yes and remember practice makes perfect which just means draw as much as you please, play that keyboard until you get bored, build legos a bag at a time, that's how you get better
Oskar vanZandt 2 weeks ago (edited)
I play adventure games on my console in "tourist mode" (sightseeing with only the lightest fighting). I'm playing for the story, not the action... Although being demi-god Kassandra in Assassin's Creed Odyssey and kicking @ss was rather fun!
Lotekguy 2 weeks ago
The above post does not apply to performing surgery or piloting airplanes.
LittleTeapot 2 weeks ago
😂 But also - work and play are different! Ideally you’re not sucking at whatever your job is, whether it’s people’s lives or livelihoods at stake!
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Trisec Tebeakesse 2 weeks ago
I'm a musician. I suck. Can't play anything without sheet music in front of me, and even that is hard. My daddy is a professional; he's proud of my efforts. I'm 58. Never give up.
Michael Largey 2 weeks ago
You don't have to be good at sky diving to enjoy it. But you have to be good at it to enjoy it twice.
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 2 weeks ago
I love video games. I will play some games on easy because I want to have fun and follow the story without stress. Of course, then I played Xenoblade and it shattered my heart anyway.
Leesa DeAndrea 1 week ago
I used to enjoy singing along with my favorite songs. Then I was told I can't sing. Now I only sing when no one can hear me. How is that the hateful things you are told are the only ones that stick with you?
Janet Graham 1 week ago
Live for yourself first! A happy you makes for happy folks around you.
Christine Stewart 1 week ago
My ex-boyfriend used to make fun of me while playing Frisbee, because I had to catch it with 2 hands. This is one of the (many) reasons why he is an ex lol
That's how "gatebreaking" came to TikTok, the opposite of gatekeeping. The idea is that there should be no barriers to information, expertise, places, or knowledge. But Bergman observes that there's more nuance to this problem. While being against gatekeeping is, in essence, standing against inequality, it's alright for some people to sometimes stay on the fringes of certain spaces.
#28
Pls Info Dump On Me I Love It
Kise Miarse 2 weeks ago
I always start off so excited to share my nerd sh*t and then get self-conscious that nobody probably wants to hear it and I don't want to be "that guy" so I taper off. It makes me sad though.
#29
Slow Down
#30
Drink What You Like!!!
However, in most cases, the old cliche "sharing is caring" might just be true. Sharing information, access, knowledge, and just genuinely having each other's backs. If this wholesome list is right up your alley, Pandas, check out the previous ones that we've done about the "Gates Open, Come On In" community here and here!
#31
Words To Live By
Glen Ellyn 2 weeks ago
"Be kinder than necessary. Everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."
#32
Good Parentin
Glen Ellyn 2 weeks ago
Oops. I first read it as "There is a family next to me at the stove." My thought was, I hope it's your family! 🤭🤦🏻♀️ Now that I've confessed my reading blunder, this kid has a great dad!
#33
Definitely Mercedes! Wait...what?
#35
Sh*tter’s Open!
Libstak 2 weeks ago (edited)
I've never understood the toilet issues. I mean if you have male and female guests in your home they all use the one bathroom and nobody blinks. Nobody checks their friends and family for proper hygiene eitquette in some questionnaire or some c**p before they come either, they are literally unknown in their toilet habits and everybody is just okay. So wtf with the outrage everywhere else?
#36
Found My Weekend Plans
#37
Really Behind You
#38
I'm Sure Many Of Us Needed To Hear This
Donkey boi 2 weeks ago
My lane is supporting all of youse on the internet and wasting the trolls' time, when I get a little spare time. Because I simply don't have the time (and truthfully, often can't be arsed) to be "active".
#39
As Someone Who's Gone For 6 Years, It Really Does Make A Difference
Susie Elle 2 weeks ago
Waiting for my ADHD/depression/whatever it is diagnosis (or no diagnosis, perhaps) :) Due to insane waiting lists I'm only due october next year, but I guess that's something.
#41
Sometimes You Win Sometimes You Learn
#42
Another Good One From Tumblr
#43
All Fans Welcome
#45
Japan/America Cultural Exchange
#46
Something Wholesome From Facebook
#47
Do You, No Matter What!
#48
Women Wearing What They Like In Peace
Donkey boi 2 weeks ago
A unicorn onesie would be pretty awesome. I wonder if they do them in my size?
#49
Gay Body Shaming Is Real
Add New Image
What do you think ?
Not-a-Clue (she/her) 2 weeks ago
THIS is what BP used to be all about. Really positive. More, please.
Kylie Chapman 2 weeks ago
Is feeling hemochromatoicy the appropropriate term for the not being able to access more meme’s about inclusion because they’re now caught behind a Paywall? Is there another more appropriate term for too much irony? Or do we just now use the term “Panderish?”
Makenzie McNeal 4 days ago
I love how this has 50 items and only the 50th one is cut off. lol.
Kare Deter 2 weeks ago
BP WTAF!?!?! Unless I subscribe I have no access to MY OWN FREAKING POSTS or responses to them once you cut the original post from 99 to 50? On top of everything else, you don't DESERVE anyone's money for stealing material, repackaging it and calling it "writing". UTTER BS. Your ADS support your service stop being such twatwaffles.
Forrest Hobbs 2 weeks ago
Chill, dude. You can see your own posts (albeit not in context) by looking at your user page. Meanwhile - well, you say BP doesn't deserve any money for providing this small service for us? And then go on to say that BP gets "support" (that is, money) from advertising? Do you not see a small inconsistency? Everything costs money. Posting a comment here on BP costs money - paid by BP, mostly from ad revenue. Just - hey, chill a bit?
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Not-a-Clue (she/her) 2 weeks ago
THIS is what BP used to be all about. Really positive. More, please.
Kylie Chapman 2 weeks ago
Is feeling hemochromatoicy the appropropriate term for the not being able to access more meme’s about inclusion because they’re now caught behind a Paywall? Is there another more appropriate term for too much irony? Or do we just now use the term “Panderish?”
Makenzie McNeal 4 days ago
I love how this has 50 items and only the 50th one is cut off. lol.
Kare Deter 2 weeks ago
BP WTAF!?!?! Unless I subscribe I have no access to MY OWN FREAKING POSTS or responses to them once you cut the original post from 99 to 50? On top of everything else, you don't DESERVE anyone's money for stealing material, repackaging it and calling it "writing". UTTER BS. Your ADS support your service stop being such twatwaffles.
Forrest Hobbs 2 weeks ago
Chill, dude. You can see your own posts (albeit not in context) by looking at your user page. Meanwhile - well, you say BP doesn't deserve any money for providing this small service for us? And then go on to say that BP gets "support" (that is, money) from advertising? Do you not see a small inconsistency? Everything costs money. Posting a comment here on BP costs money - paid by BP, mostly from ad revenue. Just - hey, chill a bit?
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