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Have you seen Midnight in Paris? The movie is not about the city per se, rather it's about our fascination with it. Woody Allen asks us why the dream of Paris seems more powerful than walking on its streets.
However, it's not just historical European landmarks that infatuate our minds. That cause us to look at the world through an unrealistic lens. No, no, there are many more culprits — we're too easily swayed.
Last week, Redditor u/Buttercuppy44 asked other users, "What's something we need to stop normalizing?" And it turned out to be a discussion we really needed. People straight away came through with plenty of specific and accurate examples.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Having to respect a damaging point of view because it's part of someone's religion.
No, I don't have to respect your belief that women are inferior or that LGTBQ+ people shouldn't have rights because your religion tells you to believe that. It's a bad point of view.
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#2
Canceling people for things they did 10+ years ago. If someone has shown growth in that time then let them grow.
#4
Coming to work sick. People tend to get praised for that, but they are in fact just endangering others to get sick as well — and in the end, it costs the company more than if they would've just stayed home.
Human #1,232,867 3 years ago
Lot of time, the pressure to go to work come from the management side.
#5
Being rude to retail and food workers. We work hard all day, deal with some of the worst customers bar none, and really don't get paid enough to support families but we do it anyway. For way less than it's worth
#7
Filters that change the shape of your face to fit a beauty standard. Kids are growing up with an even more distorted view of what they should look like than previous generations
#8
Taking pictures of strangers without their knowledge and posting it on the internet. It is toxic as hell and it wasn't that long ago it was seen as creepy.
Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago (edited)
It should be illegal. The last thing I want is for someone to take a photo of me and end up becoming a meme or something.
#9
That anything is possible if you try hard enough. Don't get me wrong, a lot is possible, but not everything. There are factors beyond ourselves that determine our success. The best we can do is to give our best, and be happy that we've done so.
TheBlackPanda (JustABlackBear) 3 years ago
Hardwork doesn't always lead to success. A lot of people that became successful through "hard work" don't usually include one thing in their success stories: the role of luck. Some of them were lucky to be born in the right place, to the right people, at the right time, happened to go to the right school, happened to make the right friends, etc. For every success story, there are thousands and millions that did the same amount of hardwork and got nowhere. The difference is, those hardworking but unsuccessful people were simply unlucky. No one knows a sure formula for success in life. It's easy to think you do when you've made it.
#10
People being bastards on the internet, because of anonymity.
#12
The greed of the top 1% that fuels the pollution and decay of our planet.
Looking at you Jeff, Bill, and Mark
NsG 3 years ago
I'm going to get downvotes here, but you need to swap out Bill for Richard. Yes, Mr Gates has done some deplorable things while gaining his millions. But he has done philanthropic things that the others haven't even considered. Demonstrably tried to improve things for the rest of humanity. The others? No bathroom breaks and trains that barely run at all never mind on time. Oh, and I'm damn sure it wasn't his age that stopped him taking part in the Prick Space Race, so that's a point in his favour too. Dislike or full on loathe him all you want, but he is no longer in the same league of greed and evil as the others. (Mr Zuckerberg is in a league of his own, although he does look like he wants to be Bezos when he grows up, so...)
#13
The idea that being an as*hole is a sign of intelligence. Jerks are rarely intelligent. Sheldon Cooper, Rick Sanchez, Hannibal Lecter, and Dr. House do not exist.
In my experience, being rude and condescending turns out to be a sign of stupidity, not intelligence.
Anne 3 years ago
Sheldon was actually very true to life for a lot of smart autistic people..but he would be what we would be without adapting skills. And most of us have adapted to our environment.. But he feels rather authentic. He isn't rude or condescending - he just doesn't understand most humans. That's why he follows the rules.. hot beverages for upset humans etc.
#15
Having an opinion on everything.
It’s okay to look at something on the internet and think to yourself “I don’t have to care about this.”
Human #1,232,867 3 years ago
Best time saver, ever... (Oh, why do I put a comment here? I should not care) /s
#16
Kids doing animal abuse. Stop it with, "they are just kids they don't know any better"
Luka Verheijen 3 years ago
If it's too extreme, it's often a sign of a sadistic personality, so more reason to work on that early
#17
The idea that a woman can slap a man if she's angry at him, but a man should never hit a woman regardless of the circumstances.
The former is assault - hitting people who aren't already involved in a physical altercation is never OK, regardless of the circumstances. The latter ties into that; if you are being attacked, the level of force you use in defence should be dependent on the danger you are in, which has almost nothing to do with the sex of your attacker.
Both of these rely on the tired and sexist trope that women are meek little does who have not the physical strength nor moral turpitude to commit violence against the big, strong, tough men. They normalize assault and abuse and accordingly belong in the dustbin of history.
Luka Verheijen 3 years ago
Finally someone who adresses this! This double standard bothers me fir a long time. Also, some women who try to be "feminists" still keep this in check. If you want equal rights for men and women, that includes the downsides too
#18
Bullying. It's absurd how society will frame it as a "stage of your life" rather than supporting individuals more so they know how to deal with it. Especially academically, still overlooked majorly.
#19
Alcoholic moms. No, you don’t NEED to bring wine to your daughters soccer game. It’s not quirky. It’s awful. Wine mom stuff on social media only strengthens it and makes it more popular.
Grumble O'Pug 3 years ago
Instamom is the stuff if nightmares. Like the recent one where she jams on the brakes to teach her kid to buckle up. Full blown narcissism in action
#20
Using mental illness as an excuse. I suffer from several, and it's very hard on me.. But, i get professional help and deal with it head on. Reading constant posts everyday about people having this disorder and that disorder and that's why it's ok to act a certain way is demotivating. Awareness is important, but dozens of posts everyday about having borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder and why it's acceptable for you to be an a-hole is not awareness... If you suffer from these so badly, please get help
#21
Married couples disliking one another. Normalizing abusive and toxic elements in marriage is lame, bro.
#22
Working while on vacation. You go on vacation to relax and enjoy yourself, not to try to fill out spreadsheets and deal with work stuff in your hotel room.
#23
Using the phrase "it's my right" as a get out of jail free card to engage in whatever reckless behaviour that takes your fancy.
#24
The entire "game" involved in modern dating or even most social interactions. The playing hard to get, the "arriving fashionably late" like people can we please keep it simple?
Ya go on laugh at me.
#25
Unhealthy weight. I’m not talking about being fit and thin and making people feel bad about their bodies. Im not talking about having a few extra pounds and making people feel bad for that. I have a few extra pounds, I’m not super fit, but I’m relatively healthy. Everyone’s body is different. Healthy means a lot of different things.
I’m talking about normalizing morbidly obese people as beautiful and something to be celebrated. It’s dangerous especially if children see them as someone to look up to. Then they’ll think it’s ok for your body to carry around so much weight that your heart and lungs are working overtime to keep you alive. It will lead to devastating later years in life as you age and your body slows down. You’ll be at risk for cardiovascular issues, you’ll probably die before your time, and the last few years of your life will be bed ridden while you waste away.
Otter 3 years ago
While I agree that there is such a thing as unhealthy weight, you still won't see me attacking the "body positivity movement". Because for people to change for the better, the first step has to be letting go of the self-hatred and shame that plagues the seriously overweight and drives them into a self-destructive spiral of self-harming and self-comforting behavior. If the body positivity movement helps anyone let go of the guilt and self-hatred that's poisoned their lives then more good than harm has been done, and it's not like body negativity ever did anyone any good. You can't shame people into being thinner or healthier, that's not how humans work.
#26
having unsocial and aggressive dogs, and not leashing or otherwise controlling them
#27
Degrees for office jobs that take almost no time to learn and usually have nothing to do with the degree anyways . So many people out there who can’t afford college but, are just as capable as anyone else.
#28
Diamond and gemstones as gifts. They're shiny rocks with artificially inflated value. They're only expensive because people are willing to pay so much for them. If everyone stopped buying them, the price would fall faster than the Hindenburg. Or faster than the employment rate this year.
Jo Johannsen 3 years ago
I'm always depressed by the "my ring has got to be the biggest" stories.
#29
Cheating. Sooo many "love stories" on netflix, or just any sort of romance movie released these days have cheating involved in them so much. It's always branded as this romantic thing to do. Oooo like at this dark and brooding handsome guy with no personality. Time to f him and forget about my 2 year relationship, or some s*** like that. It's not romantic, it's just wrong, and it should not be normalised.
Luka Verheijen 3 years ago
It's all a little more complicated, some people seem to think cheating is about as bad as it can get. But that being said, romance movies are actually the most messed up when you think about it
#30
Unhealthily obese pets. You took a warrior and domesticated it! They aren't happy if they're fat! They just eat on instinct! Stop inadvertently hurting the beings that love us unconditionally!
#32
The grind. Not taking vacation. Working on vacation. Working through your lunch break. Working early and late all the time. Answering emails after hours.
We are completely dispensable to the companies we work for. Don’t lose your life grinding for a company who only thinks of you as a number.
#33
Over-consumption. This goes out to social media influencers who flaunt their hauls and influence people to buy things that they don't need. It will just add on to the landfills. Please, no one's benefitting from hoarding.
#35
Toxic positivity. There’s a huge difference between being optimistic and having raised colored glasses on. We’re all people, and we all experience negative and positive emotions. The only way you can properly get over your emotions is by allowing yourself to feel them. Glossing over your emotions with an aura of “Everything’s fine” isn’t going to solve anything, and it’s just gonna make you feel bad.
#36
Failures in political leadership. I feel more and more we are becoming less critical of failed character in our leaders.
#37
Student loans.
Education is getting more expensive by the day and the added burden on a student in paying back a student loan helps nobody.
Furthermore people encourage student loans as though the students are obligated to take them if they pursue higher studies. Pure nonsense.
#38
Hating police. I've worked places that police don't go. You all don't know how good you have it.
Kesam 3 years ago (edited)
I don't hate police in general, but I've had my arm and nearly my skull broken during the 2001 Genoa protests (unprovoked attack on peaceful protesters) and I was in the Diaz school raid (but luckily wasn't hurt as I was hiding in a closet). Sooo... there's good apples and bad apples... but the bad apples do a lot of damage as they are put in a position of power.
#39
Students overwhelmed by homework when it isn’t necessary. I’m excluding situations like when the workloads from classes are reasonable and happen to pile on one day or students who aren’t organized, etc. This whole thing is a grey area, but sleep, burnout, mental health exists.
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
A little coordination between teachers could solve this problem. I can remember the times where we had to do an assignment for English and an hour later our French teacher came up with a similar time consuming assignment. When we explained that that meant we had to choose which one we could do, he postponed the assignment for 2 weeks. But other teachers just said "Deal with it." It's education, teacher, we're not operating a multibillion dollar business with deadlines and targets here.
#40
Not caring about education. So many people obviously didn't pay attention in elementary school and don't care about it.
What do you think ?
Bowtechie 3 years ago (edited)
Defining your personality by your illnesses/disabilities - both physical and mental. It's wonderful to educate the world and promote acceptance, but when it starts becoming the crutch you lean on to defend toxic behavior, it's a problem. I'm sick of depression and anxiety and chronic illness being treated as a "quirky personality trait" rather than real, life-altering issues. It makes people minimize your experience and think you're just exaggerating because "x tiktok star manages so why can't you?". Idk, man, maybe it's because these kinds of conditions manifest differently in each person, or *le gasp* social media isn't real. As a bonus: giving your two-cents on someone's health when you have no business doing so. I'll listen to my doctors, not your sudden need to plug health fads.
AnnaBanana 3 years ago
Totally agree. As a bipolar and clinical depression sufferer who was diagnosed about 30 years ago and heavily medicated since, the current 'trend' of people self-diagnosing these conditions drives me nuts. If people had actually experienced any serious mental health condition, believe me, they would go out of their way to NOT have these conditions! In my case, it's been a very long battle involving heaps of medication, psychiatrists, being locked in the loony bin a couple of times etc., that has been extremely difficult at times. More times than I can count, actually. Mental illness is not something to be ashamed of, but it's certainly not something you should wish on yourself. Life is hard enough!
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Bowtechie 3 years ago (edited)
Defining your personality by your illnesses/disabilities - both physical and mental. It's wonderful to educate the world and promote acceptance, but when it starts becoming the crutch you lean on to defend toxic behavior, it's a problem. I'm sick of depression and anxiety and chronic illness being treated as a "quirky personality trait" rather than real, life-altering issues. It makes people minimize your experience and think you're just exaggerating because "x tiktok star manages so why can't you?". Idk, man, maybe it's because these kinds of conditions manifest differently in each person, or *le gasp* social media isn't real. As a bonus: giving your two-cents on someone's health when you have no business doing so. I'll listen to my doctors, not your sudden need to plug health fads.
AnnaBanana 3 years ago
Totally agree. As a bipolar and clinical depression sufferer who was diagnosed about 30 years ago and heavily medicated since, the current 'trend' of people self-diagnosing these conditions drives me nuts. If people had actually experienced any serious mental health condition, believe me, they would go out of their way to NOT have these conditions! In my case, it's been a very long battle involving heaps of medication, psychiatrists, being locked in the loony bin a couple of times etc., that has been extremely difficult at times. More times than I can count, actually. Mental illness is not something to be ashamed of, but it's certainly not something you should wish on yourself. Life is hard enough!
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