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30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them
Successful couples understand and accept the fact that there will always be things they don't agree with or don't like about each other. And that's fine; nobody's perfect.
But many people don't share their every thought and feeling with their significant other, either.
In fact, according to an international study of 80,000 people carried out by Dr. Pepper Schwartz, a professor of sociology at the University of Washington, secrets and lies are commonplace in relationships. 43 percent of men and 33 percent of women say they keep major secrets from their partners, as well as 27 percent of those who say they're in an "extremely happy relationship."
Interested in how these two aspects collide, Reddit user Familiar_Stranger936 made a post on the platform, asking everyone to share what they dislike about their significant other and don't tell them about it. As of today, the post has 9.8K comments, many of which illustrate the quirks and pet peeves that folks choose to keep to themselves.
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#1
They’re taking way too long to find me
RELATED:
#2
I once pushed in my husband’s hemorrhoid while we were out of town so we could enjoy our vacation. There’s nothing I hate about him that I wouldn’t tell him after that.
ETA: thanks for the awards! To answer a few questions: 1. He tried to do it himself and failed. 2. He had gone to the pharmacy and gotten Preparation H cream and gloves, so I didn’t go in bare-handed (I’m not an animal, guys). 3. An internal hemorrhoid can be pushed back in; an external one cannot. 4. I wrote that answer and went to sleep pretty soon after, and he hasn’t killed me as of this morning, but that may change once he’s seen the upvotes lol.
Nice Beast Ludo 1 year ago
I clearly don't understand how hemorrhoids work and pray I never find out
#3
That he’s not immortal. Selfish bastard.
#4
He’s really really bad at taking criticism. Really bad. And I can’t tell him this because feedback loop etc.
#5
That they expect an apology for every hurt feeling, but almost never take accountability or apologize for their own actions when they hurt other people.
HelluvaHedgehogAlien 1 year ago
Roses are red. Violets are blue. So many red flags. Especially for you
#6
His sneezing.
He is allergic and can't help it. But he scream-sneezes every day, usually several times in a row, and I HATE loud sudden noises.
#7
She watches YouTube/Tik Tok videos on her phone and refuses to use headphones/earbuds. I hate it.
#8
My wife took singing lessons as a kid. She is certain that she has a great singing voice. She does not. It’s so hard to be in the same house when she’s singing but I love her dearly and would never ask her to stop.
#9
You don’t have to talk to fill silence, sometimes you can just sit in peace, you will not die I promise.
#10
I don’t necessarily hate this about him, but he doesn’t like to just kiss/make out. He will do it before sexy times, but not for very long. I love showing affection and intimacy by just making out sometimes and not having it lead to anything.
He had some trauma with it, so I can’t blame him at all. I just really wanna make out with him more!
Seb Benson 1 year ago
That sounds like something which can be bridged over time. Or at least I hope so for OP & their partner.
#11
She’s one of those people that walks too slow in the grocery store and stands there looking at s**t forever trying to decide what to get not aware that 2 other people right behind her trying to grab what she’s in front of and go
#12
The way she pronounces the word "hamburger" makes me die inside.
"ham BIRD gr"
#14
they’re not very intellectual. he’s a sweet and caring guy and incredible otherwise but sometimes I get frustrated with our conversations and the lack of mental stimulation
#15
I dont know, we are abnormally open about stuff like this to the point where it doesnt even matter anymore.
We are both annoying and rude to each other and it comes out when we flirt. An outsider who doesnt know us or how we are would think that we are incredibly toxic until we start laughing about it. Ill pretend to complain about her snoring and she will say something like "good, i like it when you suffer because i dont like you". We will just randomly tell one another "you suck" or "you smell like the inside of my a*****e" and then laugh about it. Because im older than her she jokes about buying me one of those Life Alert bracelets because she isnt sure that i will make it through the night. I talk s**t about her cats.
Love is really weird lol.
Jeevesssssss 1 year ago
I love this! My best friends are really rude to me and vice versa. When you get to that point where it's just funny it means you're totally, completely secure in your love for each other so no part of you even thinks to take it seriously. Good job!
#16
She's usually right. Damnit.
Don't tell her I said that.
Rob(erta) Roy (They/Them) 1 year ago
Hold up, did my partner write this? /j (he's right like 45% of the time)
#17
I hate how she’s a bad listener. Never wants to know about my day, never takes my advice, never wants to know what’s wrong with me.
#18
That when a responsibility becomes too hard, he just doesn't do it and allows things to fester and become worse. Our storage that was lost, a tooth abscess that caused him intense pain I'm forcing him to deal with, and him not paying the registration on our car and it almost getting repossessed. I have no clue why he does this and I feel like I have to be his mother sometimes just to get him to be a responsible adult.
#19
The sound he makes when he eats bagels. Not everything, just bagels, and he eats bagels every morning for breakfast. It’s disgusting.
Kathleen McGann 1 year ago
I used to hate the sound of my ex-husband breathing. Not making a lot of noise breathing. Just breathing. Clearly indicating that I needed to leave before I stopped him.
#20
His snoring. It's not something he can necessarily control but he snores SO loud that it disrupts my sleep.
Kelly H. Wilder 1 year ago
Possibly sleep apnea...a CPAP might help if so. It's worth seeing a doctor about because apnea can be fatal.
#21
He tells me s**t I already know.
For awhile I started saying "I already know that" or " I was right there remember" but after awhile of doing that he started acting so odd, almost unhappy, so I stopped.
It's part of who he is, and that's okay. Annoying as f**k but but it is a very small % of the big picture. He started doing it last night and I imagined him being an actor and he's going over his lines.
Helped me deal.
Steve Nelson 1 year ago
My grandpa used to say, "if you have heard this story before don't say anything. I want to hear myself tell it again."
#22
He’s a bad kisser. I tried hard to communicate and help in the beginning of the relationship, but nothing worked or stuck. It’s been a lot of years. I gave up.
Kathleen McGann 1 year ago
How do you start a relationship with someone whose kisses you don't enjoy?
#23
Heavy one incoming:
I have never forgiven my partner for what he did during my nan's final days.
We had been together for four years at that point and she died a slow, painful, confusing death thanks to stroke. The week of her death, while i'm still waist deep in grief (we were close) he chooses that moment to tell me he wasn't sure the relationship was working and he wanted to take some time out.
We slept in seperate beds after that and I cried myself to sleep, alone, every night for days.
The day of her funeral, he sat at the opposite end of the pew to me, listening to me sob.
A few days later he comes to me and tells me he's still confused about where we're heading but he wants to keep trying.
9 years later, we're married, we have a daughter and a house and two dogs, I've nursed him through his own nan's passing, I've nursed him through his father's passing. I've always been there when he had to cry and I held him every time...
And I have never forgotten. Or forgiven. I hate him for it.
And I'll never tell him that.
Fiona Corrigan 1 year ago
You need to tell him. This is eating you up and you need to give him the opportunity to apologise. Tell him how it made you feel then and how you feel now and what you want from him. You then need to be aware he wasn't expecting this conversation so give him time to think about it and come back for another talk when you're both ready.
#24
How indecisive she can be. We've talked and she's doing better. But it is extremely exhausting to plan nearly every single date/event/thing we do.
#25
That she sounds like a horse when she eats a bowl of cereal.
SuperChicken 1 year ago
Is Op for real? It's just that, this is too funny and I've never heard anyone eat a cereal sounding like a horse. I wonder if the partner kicks her leg and neighs, at the same time. (Ok, showing myself out now...)
#26
He takes about 5 years to tell a story. Takes little detours and goes into too much info about random stuff I don’t really need to know in order to understand the story! I mean don’t get me wrong it’s funny at the best of times but when you’re in a hurry and your waiting for the story to end 🤦🏼♀️
**EDIT:** he's 100% not got ADHD, my little brother has that. If anything he is the complete opposite. He's just extremely calm and likes to take his time, acts like he has all the time in the world to tell a story!
the quickening 1 year ago
You can be attention deficit without being hyperactive. Outwards, it seems completely different from ADHD, but the inner troubles are the same. Not being able to tell what's important vs. mere fluff is one of the biggest things.
#27
Disappears every night, rather than spending time with me and the kids. Doesn’t help with cleaning up after dinner, even though I always cook. Complains about being tired when I am the only one getting up with our baby for the night feed. Granted, he does have insomnia and got s****y sleep before the baby, but I’m the one who endured a horrible pregnancy, Delivery and now newborn sleep deprivation, so I kind of don’t want to hear it.
#28
Her brothers are a******s, I totally dislike them.
Auntriarch 1 year ago
It would be hard to find two people less alike than my brother and my husband. But they get along, they are both decent chaps.
#29
How low her patience is & how fast she can get irritated, and i know how she is & I know she doesn’t mean it 99% of the time, but sometimes it has me overthinking and I feel like she just hates me
Realistic Optimist 1 year ago (edited)
Honestly, if this isn't being addressed, you should consider therapy, either couples or personal. It's impossible to have a healthy relationship without healthy conflict resolution, and you feeling that way is a huge sign of poor conflict resolution. And, please don't blame yourself for feeling insecure in your relationship! Accept that your are feeling a certain way for a reason and know that your emotions are telling you something. Really listen to your emotions, and when you're ready, go to your partner. If she cares about you, she will listen and take you seriously. If she doesn't or gaslights you, it's a toxic relationship.
#30
I wake up teetering on the edge of the bed, every f*****g night. We have a king size bed and she is petite, I tell her but it doesn’t matter. Every. F*****g. Night.
What do you think ?
Superb Owl 1 year ago
I thought about the love of my life, and after all these years there is nothing I hate about her, nothing that I even dislike. Would I change her if I could? Yes. I'd take away her recurring shoulder pain and fix her thyroid problem.
David Paterson 1 year ago
My wife is kind, so kind that she puts food out for the slugs to eat. No problem there, but does she have to feed the slugs on the front steps, every night, knowing I have to walk up the steps in the dark.
Justme 1 year ago
Not my husband, but his parents. They take hours to wrap up a visit and say goodbye. His mom has literally jogged up to our car as we are pulling away to continue a conversation. Once, at a large family dinner, we were all in the driveway hugging and waving off guests as they drove off, I hugged my in-laws and thanked them for coming… and they walked right back into the house. They finally got the hint when I declared bed time and started getting ready for bed.
FABULOUS1 1 year ago
My wife has a hard time expressing her emotions and it has caused issues between us. I have no doubt that she loves me, but sometimes I wish she could express it better. When I get caught up in my own emotions and expectations of her that she probably cannot fulfill, I remind myself that her childhood experiences are the cause and to not take it personally. But also how are life together is fulfilling is so many other ways.
The Doom Song 1 year ago
My partner sometimes calls me an emotionless robot coz I'm pretty c**p at all that stuff. I do try and I know it bugs him
Load More Replies...
Raquel Mencke 1 year ago
Why do people insist on staying in unsatisfying relationships? I fully know there are situations where a separation is nearly impossible or the nuisance cannot be avoided. I'm talking about the ones that are not. It is sad to read about so many negative relationships.
Joe Publique 1 year ago (edited)
Ooooh. Lots of huge red flags in here. Jerry, Jerry, Jerry...
Superb Owl 1 year ago
I thought about the love of my life, and after all these years there is nothing I hate about her, nothing that I even dislike. Would I change her if I could? Yes. I'd take away her recurring shoulder pain and fix her thyroid problem.
David Paterson 1 year ago
My wife is kind, so kind that she puts food out for the slugs to eat. No problem there, but does she have to feed the slugs on the front steps, every night, knowing I have to walk up the steps in the dark.
Justme 1 year ago
Not my husband, but his parents. They take hours to wrap up a visit and say goodbye. His mom has literally jogged up to our car as we are pulling away to continue a conversation. Once, at a large family dinner, we were all in the driveway hugging and waving off guests as they drove off, I hugged my in-laws and thanked them for coming… and they walked right back into the house. They finally got the hint when I declared bed time and started getting ready for bed.
FABULOUS1 1 year ago
My wife has a hard time expressing her emotions and it has caused issues between us. I have no doubt that she loves me, but sometimes I wish she could express it better. When I get caught up in my own emotions and expectations of her that she probably cannot fulfill, I remind myself that her childhood experiences are the cause and to not take it personally. But also how are life together is fulfilling is so many other ways.
The Doom Song 1 year ago
My partner sometimes calls me an emotionless robot coz I'm pretty c**p at all that stuff. I do try and I know it bugs him
Load More Replies... Raquel Mencke 1 year ago
Why do people insist on staying in unsatisfying relationships? I fully know there are situations where a separation is nearly impossible or the nuisance cannot be avoided. I'm talking about the ones that are not. It is sad to read about so many negative relationships.
Joe Publique 1 year ago (edited)
Ooooh. Lots of huge red flags in here. Jerry, Jerry, Jerry...
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