There are lots of things in the world we have to look out for. The "Dumb Ways" song laid it out for us pretty clearly more than 10 years ago. Yet, the Internet seems to find new dangers we should be aware of every other week. This time, we’re featuring submissions from people about the times they messed around and found out. One person online asked: “What, due to experience, do you know not to [mess] with?” And people came prepared with all sorts of stories and practical wisdom, from never engaging in road rage and never bothering a sleeping person to taking good care of your eyes.
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Iguanas. This happened about 25 years ago on a rare cold South Florida morning. My dad (big guy, with a soft spot for animals) found a "frozen" one in our backyard, and decided to bring it inside (in a closed off room) to warm up so that our dogs didn't get to it while it was offline. As soon as that thing warmed up, it was like a bat out of hell! Teeth, nails, and tail whipping cut him up pretty good. Eventually got it out with a broom, and all my dad muttered was "ungrateful bastard" lol
EDIT:
Alright this comment is getting more traction than I anticipated! Yes, I am aware that iguanas are an invasive species in FL. I am not aware if 25 years ago, if they were deemed as big of a threat as they are now and/or if that was as common knowledge back then.
What I DO know is that my dad took it as an opportunity to instill fascination and curiosity in me as a young child. He was able to safely show me it's spines and talons, and explain that reptiles are cold-blooded and what that meant. Even more than the mini science lesson, he showed me compassion for living things. Especially as a young child, I think I would have walked away with a very different impression if he just killed it. Would that have been the right thing to do? Maybe. But I think the happy memory and lessons I learned that day were more important than a single iguana being let free.
Intuition. If something feels wrong stop. It doesn't matter if it's stepping out onto a snow-covered slope, pulling up to a sketchy gas station, or putting too small of a piece of wood in a table router, listen when your brain tells you "This is a bad idea.".
Not finishing antibiotics. Just because you feel better doesn't mean you stop taking them.
Seatbelts.
Attended a friend’s funeral. He was riding the back seat and didn’t wear his seatbelt during a roadtrip, the driver was sleepy and hit a divider, the car spun out and he was flung out. He died during the ambulance ride, only 19 years old.
First thing I do when I get into any vehicle is to buckle up.
Fanatical born again Christians.
Any born-again or recent convert to ANY religion.
Badgers.
they may look friend shaped and may also respond to psspsspss but no touchy cos they scratchy bitey.
The sea.
But it’s ok to tickle it every now and again, just be prepared to swim away quickly ok?
Not listening to medical advice of a professional I am a nurse and have seen many people have horrible lives or deaths because they thought they were smarter.
Forget those nasty vaccines, try a coffee enema with some essential oils during a waning moon just like they said on Facebook 🤡
Food poisoning. If you've ever had it for real, your personal food safety standards will rise significantly.
My husband had food poisoning from old shrimp he found in the fridge. Did he learn anything? No. I STILL have to tell him he shouldn't eat certain things or should wash his hands after handling raw meat or respect expiration dates for some foods. I honestly don't know how he made it to adulthood.
Narcissists.
You know, just because a guy likes holding his jaw, it doesn't mean he's a narcissist. Besides, it's not like he's orange.
People in the middle of a road rage incident. It is amazing how a grown adult can absolutely lose their mind when inside a vehicle.
Take care of your eyes (wear eye pro, mind what you’re doing, change contacts on time etc). A few years ago I got a small piece of metal in my eye. This became infected. Navy ships are nasty.
The infection was misdiagnosed three times. After four days everything seemed ok. On day five I woke up with my eye basically rotting from a rare bacterial infection. I was fortunate enough to keep the eye so I appear unaffected but my vision was permanently damaged. Long exposure to sunlight causes migraines if I don’t wear sunglasses. I’ve had to learn to do a lot of things in different ways. All around a life changing event.
If you're traveling never f**k with the locals. I've seen people pick fights with one of the locals and 10 of his buddies came out from every shop around them.
Maybe don't pick fights in general. See someone about your need to compensate for your tiny manhood.
* People who believe they have nothing to lose. That could be a late-stage addict or your average teenager.
* Anyone with cauliflower ears.
I'm surprised BP didn't illustrate this one with an actual cauliflower
Don’t fight. You never know who’s carrying a knife or a gun until it’s too late. Life is not a fight scene in the movies, it’s 10X worse.
Don’t f**k with someone sleeping, easy way to get beat up by the nicest person.
Wake someone by shaking their foot..further away from any punching fists
Payday loans.
When you only get paid once every two weeks because it saves your company on payroll processing and rent is due on the first of the month, this can be an easy trap to fall into.
Construction sites.
They are one of the most dangerous places to be so you have to be paying attention all the time you are in site.
Nature.
To many people think because they go camping and few times a year and shoot their gun from time to time that they can do whatever they want in the wild.
Nature only has one goal, to kill you and turn you into plant food. We spend millions of years to adapt and get away from nature. That doesn’t we somehow we have mastered nature or are immune to it. Respect it and take calculated risks when you’re out there by yourself.
Nature isn’t even trying to kill you. Your death will just be the byproduct of nature doing what it does, it has no specific reason or need for you to die right now, your death is inevitable anyway, it’s not even focussed on you, you are insignificant and nature will wait, you get to choose how long you survive but remember one slip, one moment of thoughtlessness and guess what, nature will get you.
Alcohol. I had my run of ten years drinking, had an epiphany that alcohol was killing me, and nearly five years later, those in my life who didn't quit drinking are starting to frequent the hospital.
Yup, alcohol is very effective at making you feel good, and feel less. It doesn't make you "forget" per say, it makes you disappear from yourself. Alcoholics aren't stupid, this solution IS good and effective. It just becomes the only one left. And that's the issue. That's why saying to people "alcohol/tobacco/drg is bad" usually doesn't work. Because it has an actual real good effect (especially if you develloped physical dependency). The best way out is to seek help (professional if possible), build habits and shape your environnement to make quitting bearable.
Hydration.
Drink more water. Yes, you.
Swans during mating season. Think about a goose on steroids and three times bigger. They've been know to chase down jet skis and knock the driver into the water for getting to close to their nests.
The thermostat at my dad's house.
We never had a thermostat, but even so, Calvin & Hobbes taught me to never mess with one :D
Cacti with fuzzy spines. Compared to the ones with big pointy spikes, these are the real terrors.
It took like a week for all the tiny little spines to get worked out of my skin.
My cat would gently bite the clusters of spikes, then pull them off and drop them on the floor. They are not fun to pick from your feet.
Gas station sushi. One impulsive night in college taught me that bathroom floors are cold and unwelcoming places for contemplation.
Stray tom cats. I had one hand my butt to me. Had to get rabies shots and everything.
Or cats generally, really. I recently had to give ours a tablet using the hold it's mouth open then closed method. On a more positive note, my anticoagulants are working brilliantly.
Bulls.
Don't f**k about with bulls. Even "relaxed" ones.
Do not try to sit in some elderly person’s favourite seat. Do not try to change any table arrangements like placing the coffee pots differently than they have been used to for the last Thursday of every month for 20+ years. You will never hear the end of it for the rest of your sorry life. Just keep it as usual. Which can be hard if you’re new at your workplace.
Apparently a statue of Mary was moved in my grandmother's garden after a big family visit, and somehow it was my mother's fault it was on the other side of the garden. Years later my grandmother would still remind everyone again and again about how the statue was moved.
Mentally unstable people.
You think you're crazy? Try arguing, fighting, or self-defending against a mentally unstable person.
Hydraulics. They look innocent and easy to deal with. That stuff’s ready to cut bits of you off if you don’t know what you are doing. Are you trained and / or time served to be messing with hydraulic hoses and connectors? No? We’ll step away y’fool. Same goes for pressure vessels.
Bison. They may look docile and cute, but get too close to one and you'll find out how good your health insurance is at covering an ER visit. That is, if you're lucky.
If you're celebrating your birthday or whatever else in a bar or restaurant, please do not bring balloons. Especially if the establishment is frequented by military veterans.
An ad for 24 hour full coverage foundation popped up on this list and I legit thought it was a deadly issue I’d never heard of 😂
Don't take on Busses or Semi's. Dumb drivers in my tourist town don't think about the fact big vehicles can't stop fast. The crashes are never pretty, and I've seen a LOT of crashes.
Guns, I love guns ,but they will kill you before you know what happens, always assume they are loaded and never point them at anyone unless your life is in danger.
Hydraulics. They look innocent and easy to deal with. That stuff’s ready to cut bits of you off if you don’t know what you are doing. Are you trained and / or time served to be messing with hydraulic hoses and connectors? No? We’ll step away y’fool. Same goes for pressure vessels.
Bison. They may look docile and cute, but get too close to one and you'll find out how good your health insurance is at covering an ER visit. That is, if you're lucky.
If you're celebrating your birthday or whatever else in a bar or restaurant, please do not bring balloons. Especially if the establishment is frequented by military veterans.
An ad for 24 hour full coverage foundation popped up on this list and I legit thought it was a deadly issue I’d never heard of 😂
Don't take on Busses or Semi's. Dumb drivers in my tourist town don't think about the fact big vehicles can't stop fast. The crashes are never pretty, and I've seen a LOT of crashes.
Guns, I love guns ,but they will kill you before you know what happens, always assume they are loaded and never point them at anyone unless your life is in danger.