Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app

Continue in app Continue in browser

35 People Respond To “What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?”

ADVERTISEMENT

Our behavior, and the actions that follow it, speak more than thousands of words. So often all you need to do is to sit back and watch people. Remember your male colleague who always uses that patronizing tone of voice when talking to you? Yes, it’s annoying, and no, he doesn’t sense it.

But what if it’s a tell-tale sign that the guy has internalized toxic masculinity? What if this is a precise indication that he feels insecure or somewhere deep down, even threatened by you? You may only speculate or see what guys have to say on the subject matter themselves.

The question “What is a tell-tale sign that a man is insecure about his masculinity or himself in general?” on r/AskMen got a bunch of people sharing what they think are the red flags. And it’s truly eye-opening!

This post may include affiliate links.

#1

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" If he claims to be an “alpha male” - dude, if you have to tell people (loudly and often) that you’re alpha, you are definitely not

jhope71 , Gordon Cowie Report

Final score:

172points

View more comments

#2

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Homophobia

Error-29 , Toni Reed Report

Final score:

155points

View more comments

#3

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" When he doesn’t let his girlfriend/wife wear sexy outfits in public

Darth_Xenic Report

Final score:

128points

View more comments

In daily life, we come across numerous examples of what we think is men’s anxiety about violating the male gender role. Like, a man hesitating to hug his male friends in public. Often, we jump up to conclusions and don’t give it a second thought.

But according to Jennifer Bosson, a social psychologist at the University of Texas at Austin, this may come down to how people think about manhood. She proposes that “manhood, relative to womanhood, has historically been viewed as both elusive and tenuous.”

ADVERTISEMENT

By “elusive,” Jennifer means “that manhood is not considered a developmental certainty, but instead is seen as a status that must be earned via action.” And by “tenuous,” she is referring to the idea that “manhood status, once earned, can be lost with relative ease, via a wide range of social shortcomings.”

#4

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" His view on what makes a man a man is narrow. In his mind, there are only 2-3 types of men and other types are wrong

w1987g , Karina Carvalho Report

Final score:

118points

View more comments

#5

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Constant attempts to "one-up" anything and anyone at anytime.

The_Obi-Wan , bruce mars Report

Final score:

112points

View more comments

#6

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Worrying about face and honour and fighting over it.

I've never been in a fight. 99% of my friends have never been in a fight. None of my colleagues have ever been in a fight.

Yet... you come across these f**wits who seem to think that it's normal. Quite often they complain about it. "Aw I can barely leave my house without someone starting sh*t".

In every single scenario, it is them who is the problem

Tundur , Dollar Gill Report

Final score:

109points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

These may, of course, seem ancient today, but they do emerge in daily discourse, says Jennifer. According to the psychologist, “Men—even those who are perfectly 'secure in their masculinity'—are aware that their manhood is precarious and that they may, at any moment, lose manhood status in other people’s eyes.”

“Until widespread beliefs about the elusiveness and tenuousness of manhood change, it may be unrealistic to expect the average man to violate gender role norms with ease,” she concluded in her research.

#7

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Trying to dominate a conversation or activity for no reason/Being needlessly competitive

TheBookOfSeil , fran hogan Report

Final score:

107points

View more comments

#8

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" My friend introduced me to a potential love interest of hers one evening. The conversation turned to what I look for in a guy and I said I like guys who own cats. The dude immediately cut me off and said ‘I’m sorry, there’s nothing wrong with a woman who owns a cat, but there’s something wrong with a guy who does.’ The next day my friend asked me what I thought of him and I told her he’s insecure

Mello-Knight , Elsa Donald Report

Final score:

106points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

#9

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Always fighting to be right no matter what, even if someone obviously knows what they are talking about.

Beccaaaaaalolz , Ben White Report

Final score:

102points

View more comments

#10

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Trying to crush your hand when they shake it. Usually accompanied by fixing you with what they think is an intimidating stare.

J8766557 , Massimo Sartirana Report

Final score:

99points

View more comments

#11

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" When he's not supportive of the other men in his life. A truly masculine man loves and supports his brothers and celebrates their achievement

An insecure man brings others down to prove he's on "top"

Vega3gx , Tyler Nix Report

Final score:

98points

View more comments

#12

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Any guy who thinks the words alfa and beta mean anything in a social group

idc55342 , Ashkan Forouzani Report

Final score:

81points

View more comments

#13

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" When someone gets upset over something as silly as the way another man enjoys his comfortable clothing, takes care of their body, or the way they like their vehicles.

TurtleChickenFart , Giovanni Randisi Report

Final score:

77points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#14

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Aggression and violence. Many insecure men use tactics of intimidation or just plain old violence because they feel attacked by everything, cant discuss like a normal grown up, feel like it proves they are a "real man" etc.

DevilOuttaSpace , David Hinkle Report

Final score:

76points

View more comments

#15

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" The worst are guys who use hashtags on instagram like #realman, #realmen, #realmenhavebeards, #manly, #man, #men, #alphamale, #intelligent, #smart, etc.

I'm like dude, I've never seen a confident masculine man ever once use [things[ like that. If you have to tell the world you're a "real man", or how "intelligent" or "alpha", you are... you aren't. hahaha

Nickolai808 , Dimitar Belchev Report

Final score:

75points

View more comments

#16

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Pretending to know something about a subject they don’t understand.

bayswimmer23 , Tyler Nix Report

Final score:

72points

View more comments

#17

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" When i was in the army we would definitely see people who were bullied in high school and decided to be "billy badass" and join the military then they would be teased and hazed a little as privates. But as soon as they got their own little team and a taste of power they would be the ones that made everyone's lives much more miserable than they needed to be reveling in being the tormenter.

eleazar1997 , Scandinavian Backlash Report

Final score:

69points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#18

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" won't let his girl have friends

littlegreenrock , Lauren Rader Report

Final score:

67points

View more comments

#19

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Guys who brag about how much sex they have. Ok we get it, you have sex

vidrenz , Angelo Pantazis Report

Final score:

63points

View more comments

#20

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Constantly looking for the need to brag about your wealth and physical prowess, especially on social media. I know a few dudes who define themselves by the amount of money they've made or how they're better than everyone because they practice a certain martial art

Retro_Riven , Aylin Çobanoğlu Report

Final score:

62points

View more comments

#21

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Insecure about himself: he’s middle age but constantly shares photos of himself in his “prime” such as football team, military uniform etc

weasel999 , Matt Seymour Report

Final score:

59points

View more comments

#22

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" People online who post cringey graphics of a lion or the joker with an equally cringe quote next to it saying something along tbe lines of "followers work for other, the alpha works for themselves" with some dollar signs next to it. Or other similar "motivational woke" posts

dimdimthelesser , Alex Suprun Report

Final score:

56points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

#23

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Judging people on their choice of shirt and vehicle

Comfortable_Storm_59 , Marisa Harris Report

Final score:

54points

View more comments

#24

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Constant need to demean or put others down

Duffy1978 , Cade Report

Final score:

52points

View more comments

#25

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Definitely show offs. If you are easily insulted by things tied to lack of masculinity(secretly liking pink for example) then you have fragile masculinity. Normally the truly masculine people are those that a true people. They don't need reassurance, they show emotion and the idea of girly colours, smells etc do not exist.

ArchangelDeltius , Shamim Nakhaei Report

Final score:

50points

View more comments

#26

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Here are some that I’ve seen: 1. Constant need to be in a relationship or have a “girlfriend” no matter how he feels about her. 2. Guys who talk sh*t about women who speak up or needlessly call them names 3. Guys who are uncomfortable being CLOSE emotionally or physically around other men in fear of being gay or emasculated. Also just trust your gut around people. Everyone has insecurities but there’s a fine line as to when it’s a part of people verses when people are a part of them

riripaanda , NeONBRAND Report

Final score:

49points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

#27

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" creates a nickname for himself

FaberGrad , Samuel Raita Report

Final score:

48points

View more comments

#28

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" If they think a beard equals a personality.

trumpstinyd*ck666 , William Krause Report

Final score:

46points

View more comments

#29

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Over the top displays, or almost caricatures, of masculinity. Making an effort to communicate dominance, like the sticker you described

ryanb450 , Brad Neathery Report

Final score:

45points

View more comments

#30

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" The only sign I can think of is going out of your way to prove that you are not insecure about your masculinity and/or yourself in general. Secure people aren’t looking to be validated for being secure

Plebe-Uchiha , DESIGNECOLOGIST Report

Final score:

43points

#31

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Thinking he can beat ANYONES ass, simply because he happens to be male

dodojotaro , Victor Freitas Report

Final score:

42points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

#32

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Just LOUD in general. Says he does't care what anyone says or thinks about him, but it reality seeks validation and attention from other people all the time

Makivivu , Colton Duke Report

Final score:

42points

View more comments

#33

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Has to make any situation about them, has the be the "alpha", compensates not just with a truck but constant overt "look at me" actions, disregards your opinion immediately if they disagree, dismissive towards anyone who doesn't act like them, loud on purpose because they think everyone like the sound of their voice as much as they do, "act like a man bro", constant put downs, refuses to drink any non "manly" drink, mentions how big their d**k is (it isn't), thinks sport knowledge is a personality trait

roovy60 , Jacob Bentzinger Report

Final score:

41points

View more comments

#34

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Emotionally abusive in relationships

erika513 , Matias Tapia Report

Final score:

41points

#35

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" I go to the gym a lot, I've seen guys ripped af yet don't show it off. Then I see the guys who think they need to show off every muscle in their body and have close to no actual muscle.

Or simply people on any online game with the name "alpha"

If you are alpha you don't need to show it off like its a big deal lol

UselessAccounts2020 , Dollar Gill Report

Final score:

39points

View more comments

Continue reading with Bored Panda Premium

Unlimited content

Ad-free browsing

Dark mode

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

#36

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Responds to any TRULY constructive criticism negatively, and has to defend themselves from it

13FEAR , Antonino Visalli Report

Final score:

20points

View more comments

#37

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" The "one upper." We had one at a job I worked years ago and I started lying to him to see what he would say. My favorite was when a new Taco Bell opened and I asked if he knew about the secret menu, specifically the "Quattro Macho Guapo Nachos." Apparently, yes, he had ordered them before

TheDangler , Damir Kopezhanov Report

Final score:

20points

View more comments

#38

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" AlphaMaleChad has entered the chat

JonBoah , Daniel Korpai Report

Final score:

18points

#39

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Makes gay jokes.

SupaDawk , Matheus Ferrero Report

Final score:

17points

View more comments

#40

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" How violent he gets if you call him gay

Raemnant , Brian Kndeneh Report

Final score:

16points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

#41

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Putting nuts on their trucks probably

Marquetan , Tekton Report

Final score:

15points

View more comments

#42

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Whenever the dude constantly asks for validation from other people

psychowolf00 , Kaleidico Report

Final score:

15points

View more comments

#43

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Whenever he insults himself a lot, doesn't like to be complimented, when he acts very negative,

These are some of the things that I do when I'm insecure.

waifutabae , Steve Halama Report

Final score:

10points

View more comments

#44

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" The best indication of insecurity I’ve seen in this thread is the guy who saw someone in real life who seemed hyper masculine and decided to post about him online with a leading question hoping the echo chamber would make him feel better

RiMiBe , LinkedIn Sales Navigator Report

Final score:

10points

#45

35 People Respond To "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A Man Is Insecure About His Masculinity Or Himself In General?" Procrastinates on difficult tasks. Often this is a sign that this man is insecure about their ability to produce good work and self sabotages in order to give themselves an out when the final result does not meet their standards or someone else’s standards.

I’m guilty of this and many other behaviors that are deep down rooted in insecurities.

13ass13ass , Shane Rounce Report

Final score:

8points

View more comments

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

Liucija Adomaite

Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.

Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. She has a dynamic set of experiences from advertising, academia, and journalism. This time, she has set out on a journey to investigate the ways in which we communicate ideas on a large scale. Her current mission is to find a magic formula for how to make ideas, news, and other such things spread like a virus.

Ilona Baliūnaitė

I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

What do you think ?

Mrs_ Possum 3 years ago (edited)

From personal experience, a lot of these are not just male things. I've experienced quite a bit of this from women, too. Especially the competitive, one-upmanship thing.

21points

Chris 3 years ago (edited)

100% this. Should be titled "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A dickhead Is Insecure About themselves". The gender is irrelevant.

10points

Load More Replies...

SykesDaMan 3 years ago

THANK YOU!!!

6points

Computernaut 3 years ago

Agreed.

2points

Hugo Raible 3 years ago

Yes, BP just thinks it's cool nowadays to take a dump on men.

-2points

Bill 3 years ago

If you drive a pick up plastered in Trump stickers and a Trump flag in the bed.

16points

BG 3 years ago

They're now referred to as "participation trophies".

6points

Load More Replies...

Steve Barnett 3 years ago

I’m a man and I couldn’t give a flying f-word about masculinity. The so-called ‘alpha males’ that I’ve ever met have been complete fools. Just be a useful person, care for people, not everything's a competition.

15points

Martin Kaine 3 years ago

Absolutely. Take care of those around you, help those in need, listen when people speak and hear what they say, find your passion and work at it, and if you have children, be a dad (not just a father).

5points

Load More Replies...

Load More Comments

Mrs_ Possum 3 years ago (edited)

From personal experience, a lot of these are not just male things. I've experienced quite a bit of this from women, too. Especially the competitive, one-upmanship thing.

21points

Chris 3 years ago (edited)

100% this. Should be titled "What Is A Tell-Tale Sign That A dickhead Is Insecure About themselves". The gender is irrelevant.

10points

Load More Replies...

SykesDaMan 3 years ago

THANK YOU!!!

6points

Computernaut 3 years ago

Agreed.

2points

Hugo Raible 3 years ago

Yes, BP just thinks it's cool nowadays to take a dump on men.

-2points

Bill 3 years ago

If you drive a pick up plastered in Trump stickers and a Trump flag in the bed.

16points

BG 3 years ago

They're now referred to as "participation trophies".

6points

Load More Replies...

Steve Barnett 3 years ago

I’m a man and I couldn’t give a flying f-word about masculinity. The so-called ‘alpha males’ that I’ve ever met have been complete fools. Just be a useful person, care for people, not everything's a competition.

15points

Martin Kaine 3 years ago

Absolutely. Take care of those around you, help those in need, listen when people speak and hear what they say, find your passion and work at it, and if you have children, be a dad (not just a father).

5points

Load More Replies...

Load More Comments

You May Like

40 Funny Red Flags People Shared That Have Never Failed Them

Austėja Akavickaitė

“Going Down On A Woman”: 50 Straight Guys Share The Wildest Things Labeled “Gay”

Mantas Kačerauskas

Back to Homepage

More about Social Issues

Next in Social Issues

Related on Bored Panda

Related on Bored Panda

Word Search

WordroW

Jigsaw

Crossword

Sudoku

Picdoku

Killer Sudoku

Kriss Kross

Word Flower

Trending on Bored Panda

Also on Bored Panda