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Teen Refuses To Look After Disabled Stepsister Once Her Parents Die, Gets Called A “Monster”
Responsibilities can make family dynamics complicated, as everyone has their own expectations of what is “too much.” Add in step-parents and step-siblings and you have an unfortunately volatile cocktail of possible drama and emotions.
A teenage boy ended up in a significant argument with his father and step mother after he refused to become the caretaker for his disabled step daughter. We reached out to the young man who posted the story via private message and we’ll update the article when he gets back to us.
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Disabled kids need a lot of extra attention
Image credits: halfpoint (not the actual photo)
But one teen did not want to end up being his step-sisters guardian
Image credits: LightFieldStudios (not the actual photo)
Image credits: dd_Bowl2826
Not discussing it with the son was a terrible choice
This story really highlights the fact that parents often get so used to “giving orders” to their kids that they forget they have agency and, particularly later in life, can just say no. This often does create some amount of drama, as once people start to expect something, they begin to feel entitled to it.
For example, this couple no doubt really did think that they had the childcare solution for their disabled daughter in the bag. They made the classic mistake of not actually informing their teenage son or discussing it with him, so his reaction is pretty normal. Instead of working out an agreement, they tried to push it on him.
To be fair, they do have to deal with the very real issue of taking care of a heavily disabled child. Setting aside their demands towards the teenage son, this is a good and noble thing. Setting up a fund shows that they do take her wellbeing more seriously, although at the cost of perhaps creating a rift with him.
It’s not a bad thing to consider how to handle her situation, as she clearly can’t help herself. Similarly, having family help in situations like this is entirely normal and to be expected. This really is a lifelong task and it’s good that the parents, including the step father, are fully willing to actually take the time and consider the future.
A child can’t be made to agree to major decisions like this
However, it does seem like the father may have not been entirely honest to the teen’s step mom about his motivations. After all, as his father, he would know him better, most step-parents do understand that they don’t always have the best relationship. It’s, unfortunately, not hard to imagine her asking him about this idea and him just saying that his son would be ok with it. He then doesn’t bring it up or discuss it and now family drama is the result.
Perhaps he didn’t want to deal with the fact that his son wouldn’t actually want this so he just took the path of least resistance and hoped for the best. This highlights just how important communication is because it’s not impossible that they could have worked something out, but forcing a responsibility like this on a child is just cruel.
As many of the commenters note, the son is entirely in the right to decline if he isn’t willing. He is a child, this is a major life choice that he is being bullied into. Even worse, they choose to insult him over it, calling him a “heartless monster” even though it’s not his responsibility. This went from a salvageable situation into something a lot worse.
Fortunately, the son’s mom has his back and there are a lot of netizens sharing some support, which is important. When all you have is one group pursuing you, it’s easy to lose focus on what you want and believe and just follow the group. Ultimately, his father and step mother can’t make him become the caretaker of a disabled person without his agreement.
Most thought he was in the right
What do you think ?
Glasofruix 5 hours ago (edited)
Be a bigger person = be a doormat and forget about yourself, your needs, your feelings and your future.
Janelle Collard 2 hours ago (edited)
Right? People are *always* in the wrong when they won't cave in to other people's demands.
Load More Replies... Miriam Insidecor 5 hours ago
I have a disabled sister and I'm not going to care for her if my mother passes away. I'm not the type of person to look after others and I'd grow massively resentful if forced to.
Glasofruix 5 hours ago (edited)
Be a bigger person = be a doormat and forget about yourself, your needs, your feelings and your future.
Janelle Collard 2 hours ago (edited)
Right? People are *always* in the wrong when they won't cave in to other people's demands.
Load More Replies... Miriam Insidecor 5 hours ago
I have a disabled sister and I'm not going to care for her if my mother passes away. I'm not the type of person to look after others and I'd grow massively resentful if forced to.
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