“What’s The Stupidest ‘Real Men Don’t…’ You’ve Ever Heard?” (50 Answers)
InterviewEven in this day and age in developed countries, there’s still an expectation that men ought to behave in a certain way. Instead of embracing the wide range of human emotions and interests, these men are told to be aggressive while avoiding any sort of vulnerability. This can lead to a lot of issues down the line.
Redditor u/callmevicious sparked an important discussion on the internet after asking people to share the dumbest things they’ve ever heard someone say that ‘real men’ supposedly don’t do. And the idea that ‘real men’ don’t hug their sons is just the tip of the iceberg of toxicity… scroll down to see some of the other awful expectations guys have had set for them.
Bored Panda got in touch with the author of the thread, u/callmevicious, to get their thoughts on toxic and healthy masculinity. You'll find our interview with the OP as you read on.
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Real men don't put cream in their coffee. I responded with, "real men don't give a s**t what other men think of their beverage choices."
Black coffee for me (lactose intolerant), but i do not care what anyone else puts in their coffee. It's their coffee, I'm not drinking it.
Have you tried oat/almond milk? (If you’d like to add something to the coffee , of course). I really enjoy those alternatives and many cafés have them nowadays. Great options for those of us with allergies and intolerances.
Load More Replies...real man do the things they love instead of listening to what they should do ( that applies to everyone else btw)
A REAL MAN is someone happy in his own skin, masculine traits, feminine traits , sporty or not kindness and being a good person is what areal man is
Whatever. Sometimes, I take it black, sometimes, I want cream and sweetener.
Well, despite that fact that I'm a 210 pound, masculine former rugby player who drives a pickup and has been married to the same woman for 31 years, i am in fact gay because: * I cook * I like a grande no-whip mocha * I wash my a*s * I say "Good morning" to other dudes * I sometimes drink fruity cocktails * I like chocolate, deserts and sometimes Luna bars * I use a rolling suitcase and wear sunscreen * I like the occassional rom-com and British period piece. Geez, it's amazing I'm not living in a bathhouse.... WTF?
My husband works outside and some of the guys really made fun of him for wearing sunscreen. He said, "yeah, because nothing manlier than skin cancer."
I'm a 6'3" 220 guy with a big beard, and I don't like beer very much, but will guzzle a good sangria like water. Oh, and I'm not into sports, lol.
Also the insinuation that gay men aren't men is dumb. That's literally the definition of gay, being a man who loves another man.
Can't upvote this enough, very well observed. This s**t "gay men = not proper men" needs to end (same with women obviously).
Load More Replies...Saying good morning?? Fellas, is it gay to have f*****g friends? Real men don’t say good morning to their homies? Who tf thought that up?
It depends on the setting. I say "Good morning/afternoon" to my customers, but for people I know on a personal level, my usual greeting is "Shut the f**k up. I'm just counting down the hours until I can go back to bed."
Load More Replies...Lol - I never get why people expand “being gay” to anything beyond being a man who sleeps with men. I’ve slept with lots of hyper masculine men who drink beer and like sport. The beer and sport doesn't mean they are straight 😝
News flash to everyone. Gay men run the spectrum of stereotypically rugged he-man types to stereotypically "gay" presenting. Another shocker is that there are degrees along that spectrum.
Load More Replies...??? You can do all of those "despite" things & still be gay, including being married to a woman. And since when are gay men not real men? You know which men are not real? The abusers. The cowards. The mouchers. Any who think they are better than anyone else. Who they have sex with is irrelevant.
OMG I'm gay and from cooking to rom-com, I don't like anything that you do. Am I really gay? hope my husband don't find out.
Apparently some less cranially fortunate male members of our species think that the only reason to wash ones behind is the same as cleaning a house in preparation for a visit. These people smell the way they smell for a reason.
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Real Men don't show their own children affection or accept affection from them, apparently.
Edit: Holy s**t this blew up. On behalf of all dads out there, I’m sending all of you a virtual hug. Every kid deserves to know they’re loved.
I couldn't agree more. My autistic son hugs me like he is putting me in headlock sometimes and I love it so much. I tell both of my kids that I love them all the time and if I make a mistake, I tell them I messed up and I'm sorry.
Load More Replies...I'm 67 and my son 35. After a catch up , before parting, we always give each other a hug and say to each other 'Love you'
Load More Replies...My 6yo had to fill out a little sheet at the end of the school year, one of the questions was "What makes your dad happy?". He answered "when I give him hugs and kisses". I love hugging and kissing my kids and getting little cuddles from them.
Dads are not babysitters. It’s not creepy to hug or kiss your child. You’re not a stalker by sitting on a park bench while your kids play on the jungle gym. Anybody who says otherwise is a fûcking retàrd.
Omg! This one is seriously horrible!!! To all the dads out there, shower your children with affection! How incredibly insecure must a man be to hide love for his children 😳😠!!??
Not even insecure. My dad just has anger issues and needs a person to blame. Since I prefer being alone, am lesbian and have few friends I‘m usually the scapegoat to all his problems :)
Load More Replies...Well that's how you get strippers. Don't want that to happen? Make sure you let them kno they're loved every fuxkin day!
I have known some strippers when I was in night school and most of them said they were from loving families and they only did it because the money was good as paid their way through school.
Load More Replies...my dad is cold lol he just sits and wait to be fed, he works doe but he doesnt do anything around the house
That’s exactly what my dad does, but on top of that he calls me crazy and said I’d be easier to take care of if I was mentally disabled and that I’d be better off that way. And then he wonders why I have depression and am sick all the time. :/
Load More Replies...My son has to pay a toll of 1 kissy in order to be given a piggy back ride from me, his dad. I hug and kiss him at least 20times a day. Anyone who tells me this is unmanly can go lick a cactus
I’m sorry but “go lick a cactus”? Haha I’m stealing that one
Load More Replies...We wanted to get the thread author's thoughts on why their thread got so much attention on the internet. According to them, Reddit is "still male-dominated," which is why the topic made such a big splash.
"We as a society haven't really focused much on the 'old school' pressures we still put on men to appear stoic/strong/etc.," they told Bored Panda.
We asked redditor u/callmevicious about what could help someone become more aware that they might have toxic masculine values. "Repression leads to perversion. If you feel uncomfortable expressing certain emotions, that's something you need to work on," the OP shared their thoughts.
"A certain portion of the population still feels there is a social stigma attached to men expressing emotional vulnerability. It's when men bottle things up that they begin to feel desperate and feel compelled to reach out to the more extreme male-dominated, and toxic, corners of the internet, looking for understanding."
Real men don't eat bananas. I just went to a bachelor party where I was the only gay man. I flew in from out of town so I asked the person buying the food for the weekend to get me some bananas for my breakfast. No one else would eat a banana that weekend. One guy even cracked a joke about how it was gay to eat a banana. When I eat a banana I'm thinking about a banana. If you think about a p***s when you see a banana, maybe you have some unresolved issues.
BP!!! Please get over your prudishness about even actual medical names for body parts being typed entirely out, for real. A P3nis is a penis. A v@gin@ is a vagina. Get over it!!
I worked with a guy who ate a banana or 2 everyday and often he would ask me if I wanted a bite of his banana. It was ment as a double entendre for a certain sexual act. (Done in a joking, humorous way, not in a harassment way) Well one day, I leaned over and bit off about half of it. He had the shocked Pikachu face and said "YOU ATE MY BANANA!"
lmao almost every dude at my gym eats a banana after a good workout. I'm talking about real ripped powerlifters here, bananas are perfect for restoring your blood sugar so your body doesn't metabolize the muscle tissue you're trying to grow in the first place. So, this begs the question - do these real men even lift?
9 year old among us kids who spend way too much time on tiktok
Load More Replies...Aside from being used for scaling, eating bananas is not gay. Where do people come up with this c**p?
Kids in my first and second grade would do this thing where they would humiliate anyone that ate bananas, lollipops or anything vaguely penis shaped, it screwed me up for sure (even more so as a neurodivergent kid with a collection of traumas) but it has nothing to do with manliness.
Anything behind that is stupid. Literally anything. There is no such thing as "real men". If you identify as a man, you are a man, no matter what you wear, how you behave, what you do for a living and what gender your partner is. This "real men don't" should go die in a fire, no matter what follows behind it.
I’m more of a real man than anyone who tries to qualify something as “real men” and I’m the queerest gay homo fae fāg on the planet.
Well, if there is something that real men shouldn't, it would be: "neglect their responsibilities." But then, not-real men and grown-ups in general shouldn't. Oh, and 'throw tantrums,' might be one of them too.
I agree. My bloke is 6'3. Shaved head. Tough looking bloke. I have seen him cry. He has emotions and shows them. He is kind and will help anybody that nee
I'm 6'2", 110kgs, pink and blue mohawk and am currently wearing a tee with a unicorn and the words "I'm a cutie pie" on it.
Back in the 70's/80's there was a saying that real men don't eat quiche.
Did you literally mean to say „everything" instead of "anything"???
"Real men don't order dessert."
I'm sorry, it's "gay" to like sugar? This real man is gonna deep throat a bananas foster while holding eye contact with you the entire time.
".... deep throat a bananas foster while holding eye contact..." I'm dying here.
It‘s the opposite where I live. In fact, us housewives make desserts or buy ice-cream in strorage ESPECIALLY for our men. It‘s commonly known and lovingly joked about, that men have more of a „sweet tooth“ than women. This cliché is even used for a chocolate commercial. So basically here it would rather be „unmanly“ not to like cake‘n‘ candy! 😂
My friend deep throats bananas while making eye contact with cis guys and sometimes me
Yeah, I'm a guy and I'll eat the effing eff outa some cheesecake...it doesn't even have to be good cheesecake.
Load More Replies...Meanwhile, the redditor shed some light on the main signs of someone who has embraced healthy masculinity. In their opinion, dignity and integrity are the most vital.
"Respect for yourself and others, particularly those who may be more vulnerable or face more of a struggle than you do. Having a sense of community is crucial; feeling both responsible for and needed by those around you," they said.
"One of the most oft-cited quotes on Reddit is, 'A child that is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.' A lot of these guys feel not only isolated but unwanted. The only solution for it is to leave your keyboard and actually interact with people, without the buffer of a screen between you."
I was at Joanns and the man behind me in line was buying something for his wife and didn't have any coupons. I told him about the app and the website and offered to pull up my coupons for him to use.
He laughed and said "Boys don't use coupons"
So weird. It's free money. How fragile is your masculinity that you pay full price when you don't have to.
In all honesty, I can't be bothered with coupons. It takes too much time and mental energy. But it's nothing to do with manliness
Load More Replies...Apparently his masculinity is as fragile as annealed glass (I looked that up just to make this comment)
My husband always asks if I have a coupon he can use. Apparently, years of being a thrifty, single parent has rubbed off on him.
He's so "manly" that he won't use a coupon but he's shopping at Joanns fabric and craft store..."for the wife"...? Not knocking Joanns or guys that go there. I'll roll up in there looking for bits and bobs myself. Just seems like the guy in the post is trying to deflect or something.
I'm sure he was in there shopping for his wife. But if he were in Lowes and someone asked if he was shopping for his wife, he'd probably say that "boys don't shop for their wives."
Load More Replies...maybe "boys" don't use coupons. I mean, they're kids, what do they know about that stuff? Plenty of grown men that I know use them though.
Early in our relationship my husband was like that. When he saw just how much I saved using coupons, which freed up that amount of the grocery budget for other, extra things, he started using coupons. He also started out being leery of buying feminine products for me. When I pointed out that it signaled the fact that he was in a real relationship with a real woman, he started being downright proud to buy them for me. Girlfriends, it’s all in how you spin it to men. Simple as that.
I just used a coupon to save over $100 on something from Wayfair… and I’d do it again. [sips tea]
Change diapers. We had four kids and I was a union steel worker. I took a withdrawal on the union card because the cost of daycare for children was just ridiculous, so my wife, who was a school teacher carried the benefits and I stayed home with our last kid. I had more than one ironworker tell me that real men don’t change diapers. I asked them what they would do if their kid had a dirty diaper, and they all said the same thing. They would have to sit in it until the wife got home. It was then I realized how ignorant these guys were.
So real men maliciously neglect their children's basic needs?
That's so really manly, I'm gonna hit a steel bar with my bare fist to celebrate it!
Load More Replies...What kind of husband and father doesn't do his share with his own children? I changed my daughters' diapers and 40 years later changed my wife's. I guess I must not be a man at all! Damn!
@Living Example: Actually, you are the best kind of man. Your family is lucky to have you.
Load More Replies...'Real Men' are not afraid to get s**t on their hands for the sake of their kids
My grandpa hunted tigers, played hockey, was a crack shot, was a counter-espionage operative in WWII and generally lived a life straight out of the kind of deeply-problematic, mid-century, boy's own adventure that these idiots would salivate over. He also changed diapers, fed babies, and generally cared for my sister and me while my parents were working. If it was good enough for him it's good enough for any of these insecure manly men.
Pretty sure that qualifies as neglect and abuse. The child would develop a horrible and painful rash that could eventually eat away at the tissue down to the bone. Especially if the child poops in the morning shortly after mom leaves and has to sit in it for 8+ hours 5 days a week..do these "men" hate their children? Wtf is wrong with some people
I have worked with a few guys in the past who were proud of the fact they did very little with regards to looking after their kids
Ignorant and cruel. Sitting in a full diaper hurts babies. The ammonia of their pee burns, and the s**t dries and cracks and pulls on their skin. F*****g child abusers, those other a*****e ironworkers. Bet they’re divorced now, and their kids hate them.
My dad told me once, "Men don't say thingy."
And frankly I agree. A man should speak eloquently. Be sure to enunciate. A say specifically what you mean.
Besides, there are way better words than 'thingy".
For example, doohickey, thingamajig, whatchyacallit, or whoswhatsit are of my favorites.
Ah.. the fun me and the missus have had during a building emergency when I've asked her to pass me the thingy..... 'no.. not that.. the thingymajig.... there... no not there.. the who'd youmaflip next to it.. no.. not that f*****g way... oh christ's sake... the wottsit with the handle.... not that one... how the f**k could that fit on this nut? right... are you taking the p**s now? I swear to f*****g god you're doing this on purpose now..... stop laughing... it ain't funny till we've stopped the flooding..... here hold this whilst I go and have a smoke look in the garage.
If I can’t remember something I’ll usually say thingy, what’s-it-called, what’s-his-name, etc.
My favorite is "deelywhack". When I can't think of the name.
For an unknown, maliable substance such as peanut butter, grease or dynaweight, it's called "doopuckey"
The r/AskReddit thread made a massive splash on the internet. At the time of writing, Reddit user u/callmevicious’ question had 24k upvotes. The topic was incredibly popular, which just goes to show that toxic masculinity is still alive and kicking in this day and age. On the flip side, more men are aware of the dangers it poses.
Verywell Mind points out that toxic masculinity creates “extreme pressure” to behave in ways that are detrimental to their emotional, mental, and physical health. These men are expected to act tough, be aggressive, reject anything even closely resembling femininity, and strive to attain power and status.
A guy at work described something his daughter did as “cute” and then some douche told him that men aren’t supposed to call things cute.
I would have pinched his cheek and said 'there there - you're a little cutie too'
yeah, but he'd have probably come in his pants at someone actually touching him.
Load More Replies...I call things cute all the time, usually when I see a miniature version of a tool I use for work. I'm all "OOOOOOHHH... Look at it, it's a baby (insert tool name) It's so cute." My wife doesn't understand it, but I'll never understand cute shoes, so...
Why do you care what some jackâss says about your vocabulary? Especially when describing your kids..
I have embraced the usage of the word cute, I use it to describe myself ironically.
Reminds me of an old coworker. One of our female coworkers called a guy's car cute. "You don't call a man's car cute, call his dog cute and he'll kill it". My response, if you kill that cute dog, I'll take a baseball bat to the side of your head.
"Real men don't have cats."
Laughable.
Again, I am apparently not a real men but I don’t give a damn, I love cats more than anything
Ngl cats are really hated for their stereotypical "U show me love I don't show U love"/jerky attitude. Like dude I have 5 of them and they all would rather meow louder than a police siren than miss out a chin scratch
My love for my cat is far, far greater than the derision of any small-minded man.
Tiger/big kitty/really big cat...same thing lol
Load More Replies...The MOST real men are kind to ALL animals, and if they develop a bond with a cat, then they become a cat lover and potential cat parent. My husband is a big burly manly man, and he absolutely LOVES cats and they love him, starting with the two cats I had when we got married, 22years ago., and continuing to today and beyond.
Because "real men" can't control a cat like they can a dog..truly disgusting 🤬
"cry" literally everyone cries stfu.
My husband cried when both our daughters were born and it made me love him even more!!! So yes, seriously STFU with that b******t nonsense!!!!
Sounds weird but...the first time my boyfriend cried (he doesn't really cry because he's autistic) was because he realised how much he didn't want to lose me, when I said we should go separate ways because of his obsessive weed use ...he broke down. And told me I was more important than a stupid drug he was addicted to. I fell more in love with him there and then and he's not done anything since 2 years and are now expecting our first baby. I love him so much because he showed emotion.
when a guy shows his emotions i would literally get attached so easily i think its attractive if they show their emotions lol
I sat down yesterday and deliberately watched stuff that would make me cry, I just fancied a good cry.
The only times I've ever seen my dad cry is when his mum died and then at my step mother's funeral. The day after his wife died, he did the usual British 'stiff upper lip' thing but he broke at her funeral. She was only in her 60's, she'd had Parkinson's and died from aspiration pnuemonia.
this right here is why so many men keep their feelings bottled up and why so many men unalive themselves we need to do better nothing wrong with a cry i dont care what any guy says real men do cry to be able to show your feelings and be vulnerable in a society that says you shouldn't that my friends is badass
A huge problem with toxic masculinity is that it glorifies unhealthy habits. There’s a warped belief that self-care is meant for women only and that men should just tough things out. The result is that some men avoid going to see doctors when they run into health issues. They also avoid seeking a therapist’s help when they’re struggling with their mental and emotional health because they see it as a sign of weakness.
Meanwhile, the more a man embraces toxic masculinity, the more they are to engage in risky behaviors, from heavy drinking and using tobacco to avoiding veggies and greens. Combine that with the unwillingness to ask for help when health issues pop up and you have a disaster waiting to strike.
Drink fruity cocktails, dude, my cocktail has 5 spirits in it, it's way more alcohol than your 3.x% abv. beer and it tastes nice .
My best friend in high school (male) ordered pink lemonade when we were out to dinner and my parents made fun of him all night after we dropped him off. I got real mad and defensive and told my dad he must be gay too because all he drinks is the yellow lemonade my mom makes and there's no difference but the color
I’m a woman who started with fruity cocktails when I went out, which do contain way more liquor than you think, and definitely way more than a manly beer. Now it’s the occasional three fingers of whiskey and one rock, or a cup of coffee with a shot of Jameson’s Whiskey after dinner out. What does that make me?
At college, some guys call mini Smirnoffs "b***h beer" while drinking bud light.
Yep. A decent Long Island Ices Tea is way more potent then any beer out there...
Hell yeah. If I'm going to a Mexican restaurant, I'm not having a beer, I'm going for a margarita.
yeah you drink your not so nice tasting beer and ill enjoy my delcious fruity cocktail that probably has too much alcohol in it
I don't think the point of comparison is only the alcholoic content. Fruit cocktails are also colorful, are served in a variety of shaped glasses with an aesthetic effort and smell fruity. Apparently all of these are threatening to manliness.
Personally, I don't even drink much alcohol anymore. I know my limits as to not get stone-drunk but sometimes when I get too tipsy, I start talking and laughing way too much. People have said I become a bit more fun and merrier when I'm tipsy (I'm generally a loner and pretty stone-faced by nature), but the fear of doing something cringe (albeit unintentional) because of alcohol always sticks around.
Myself and my friends call beer a little girls drink, that we only drink if we're not having a 'drink'.
Wear pink. Pink is an awesome color - and you’re a little b***h if you think I’m not rocking an awesome color.
Also didn't pink used to be considered masculine because it was bright and vibrant or something?
In 1918 the trade publication Earnshaw’s Infants’ Department claimed the “generally accepted rule is pink for the boys, and blue for the girls. The reason is that pink, being a more decided and stronger color, is more suitable for the boy, while blue, which is more delicate and dainty, is prettier for the girl.” (https://www.britannica.com/story/has-pink-always-been-a-girly-color)
Load More Replies...I am a straight man, and my favourite color is pink. Anybody who want to judge me for that can go right ahead not like I care.
Business Insider spoke to writer, lecturer, and colour expert Gavin Evans about the reversal of pink and blue on traditional gender roles. Read the full transcript below: "In the early part of the 20th Century and the late part of the 19th Century, in particular, there were regular comments advising mothers that if you want your boy to grow up masculine, dress him in a masculine colour like pink and if you want your girl to grow up feminine dress her in a feminine colour like blue." "This was advice that was very widely dispensed with and there were some reasons for this. Blue in parts of Europe, at least, had long been associated as a feminine colour because of the supposed colour of the Virgin Mary’s outfit." "Pink was seen as a kind of boyish version of the masculine colour red. So it gradually started to change however in the mid-20th Century and eventually by about 1950, there was a huge advertising campaign by several advertising agencies pushing pink as exclusively feminine"
I have a pink shirt from the band Idles. It has a massive love heart on it, and in the middle of the heart it says 'I'M SCUM' I'm proud to wear it and I love that shirt. But I stand up and fight for my LGBTQ+ friends. It gets a lot of angry attention, as all punk rock should. Stand up for what you believe in. Maybe not in fighting, but in attitude.
I so wish he'd b***h slap his racist brother in law into next week.
Load More Replies...Whatever suits you and makes you feel good.....I rarely wear black and lots of people think I should have a little black dress no I have a little red dress
Check out the male pro golfers. They were wearing pink golf shirts ages ago. Check out the golf pants from way back. Even the pants had pink in them.
Bought my ex a salmon-coloured Looney Toons shirt (normal T but the pocket was embroidered to look like it was full of LT characters). He was iffy about wearing it... but the first time he did a million people complimented it. Even his MOTHER thanked me for introducing him to a new colour that looked good on him. (He was a 6ft-something Southern Baptist from small-town South Carolina, living in San Francisco.)
1. My cousin was working at a chocolate shop and said a guy barged in asking for "chocolate for MEN." She never did figure out what he was talking about.
2. My grandfather firmly believed real men didn't smile in photos. Smiling = gay in his mind (needless to say he was a homophobe).
Chocolate for real men has tobacco and ground glass in it. And no sugar.
Yorkie bars in the UK used to be advertised as being for real men back in the 80s. They were thick and chunky chocolate bars, so obviously too chunky for delicate female hands or mouths (the actual chocolate it was made from was utterly disgusting, like cheap waxy cooking chocolate)
Yorkie did a whole “man chocolate” ad campaign for years, was so f-ing toxic
I was going to say about Yorkie bars, didn’t their ad campaign used to be “Not for girls”..?
Load More Replies...#1: Guess he means the chocolate made with nails, ground glass, ball sweat, and testosterone.
I personally would love chocolate with testosterone, using gel is getting tiring lmao
Load More Replies...I don't share the grandfather's opinion on smiling in pictures but I don't do it cuz my cheek muscles get sore (becuz my fam takes 50 pictures in different areas so we gotta keep smiling throughout the entire shtick)
So i stopped smiling for long picture moments. If it's a quick selfie or something imma smile for it
Load More Replies...I would have given that chocolate guy cacao beans. “Here ya go, studboy.”
Broadly speaking, toxic men tend to hold sexist ideals. They tend to think that men are ‘superior’ to women and, so, avoid expressing their emotions, doing housework, and being involved in childcare. This extends to the type of interests, hobbies, and careers ‘real men’ can have. Someone with a toxic masculinity mindset might think, for instance, that anyone who is into dancing, sewing, cooking, or works as a nurse may not be as tough or worthy of respect as others.
These very same men also usually hold homophobic beliefs, often try to intimidate or bully others into submission, and are resistant to change. However, change is very much possible. And it starts with more self-awareness, and the willingness to ask oneself why they’re behaving the way that they are. Embracing the full range of human feelings and asking for help are not signs of weakness. Quite the opposite—they show a man is honest with himself, and has the strength, maturity, self-confidence, and resilience to be vulnerable when needed.
Not sure if it counts, but a young woman wouldn’t sell me a Luna Bar because it’s made for women. I said “No. It’s marketed to women. But I like this flavor.” She said “I can’t sell it to you. It has estrogen in it.” We had a frustrating back and forth before I finally convinced her that I was willing to take the risk and she sold it to me.
I think they misread the memo. Making up facts about a product is supposed to HELP u sell the product. Not make the person selling it look stupid
Load More Replies...I started eating the lemon zest Luna Bars, and my penis disappeared and I grew a vagina. When will I ever learn that I should only be eating bloody meat and beef jerky? If only I wasn’t such a beta!
That didn't happen to me, but I did grow breasts. They went away when I exercised more.
Load More Replies...Quick, we better tell them so they can prevent future disasters where men magically turn into not-men because they ate a bar!
Load More Replies...Not her call - plus she is wrong. Luna bars do not contain estrogen. They contain soy protein which can mimic estrogen but studies suggest to affect a man the amounts have to be pretty huge. Ingredients are - Protein Grain Blend (Rolled Oats (Organic Ingredient), Soy Protein Isolate, Rice Flour (Organic Ingredient), Roasted Soybeans (Organic Ingredient), Soy Flour (Organic Ingredient)), Brown Rice Syrup (Organic Ingredient), Cane Sugar (Organic Ingredient), Chicory Fiber Syrup, High Oleic Sunflower Oil (Organic Ingredient), ...
Phytoestrogens (plant estrogens) are in a lot of other things besides soy anyway. Meanwhile real estrogen is present in dairy milk.
Load More Replies...You think he wouldn't sue if he turned into a woman? LOL
Load More Replies...I would have told here that I'm trying to boost my boosome!
"Hug their sons."
My dad hugged my brother for the first time when he was 18 and graduated high school. Dad was raised by his parents to not show outwardly love towards his children because that would "spoil" us. Our childhood was...odd.
First and last time I saw my dad cry was when his bird hunting dog died. As he dug the hole to bury it in their backyard.
The older generations were tougher, sure, but I know my dad would have benefited greatly from being hugged more as a child. That s**t gets passed down.
My dad hugged us until my older brother was 12 and shrugged him off, told him he hated to be hugged. He got the idea that boys didn't need hugging. Not abuse, a good, loving dad, but off with the hugs. Fast-forward to me, 32, and he and my mom helped me to get the divorce my wife was demanding, and I told him that when I got home, he'd better stand by. He was waiting at the door, and we hugged, and he was a hug bear for the rest of his life. Just needed to be told it was okay. I wish I' could go back and have my 10 yo self tell him, "Daddy, I still want to be hugged."
Parents need to hug their kids often and affirm their love for them regularly. That’s probably why so many people turn out to be miserable and insufferable pricks as adults.
The only time I saw my dad cry was when my brother died.
This bothers me because my dad is in his 70s, doctor killed his mam when he was 3 and his dad died when he was 11. He done his fair share and we come from a mining village so they all called him gay for putting washing out on the line. They only stopped after my dad punched another kids dad when he came thinking he could take him. He always showed us love and so does my mam walkways say love you etc.
Where do you live? I want walkways that tell me they love me...lol jk
Load More Replies...Prior to my dad dying I used to hug him a lot, before and after his heart surgery I held his hand. From the way he gripped my hand back he was clearly terrified, we never said anything, no need to.
A black friend told me not to continue to hold my infant son after he fell asleep. It would spoil him and nobody would want to baby sit him. I've never forgotten that. All women love their children, but the thought of withholding affection & human touch for fear of " spoiling" a child? Gosh that explains ALOT, IMO
Race isn’t relevant to your story. Why mention it? What color are you? Is that relevant?
Load More Replies...They were definitely NOT tougher. I grew up in Israel in the 1870s, and it was a pretty macho place, and men demonstrated physical affection, including to other men, men cried openly, etc. This included men who were combat veterans, so I'm talking about men who have proved their toughness by every measure possible. It's a dumb Northern European/English thing that equates "being an emotional cripple" with "being tough".
Yeah. When I was in my mid-20s I decided to teach my dad to give hug instead of shaking hands. At first he obviously felt it was super awkward. But we did reach a point where he felt peace enough in it to initiate hugs with me. :) my grandma was a tough woman who did not like emotions and showing affection. So that was pary of her legacy. To not show that type of affection to her sons. And when I realized this I made it my quest to teach my dad to hug. 😁
When my 'now ex' offered his hand in a good night handshake with my son when he was 11, I told him (after son was out of earshot) to NEVER do that again!!! Let HIM decide if and when he's too old for a hug!!! Years later, after the divorce and my ex went to Annapolis to see my son after plebe summer, my son met him with a hug - when my ex was telling me that, his eyes teared up. SEE??????????? I knew what I was talking about. Meant the world to both of them.
Eat dessert. Seriously. I was told it was gay to eat dessert. "Because children and women like sweet things." F**k you, Paul, I am going to eat this raspberry cheesecake.
I hate cheese cake. I never understood it 😔
Load More Replies...Ooh, I've just remembered, there's sticky toffee pudding in the fridge and vanilla ice cream in the freezer.
Me a woman who doesn't like sweets 💀 . Guess I identify as a man now 🗿
M-m-m, raspberry! Gotta go make another glass of raspberry ryazhenka (and it tastes better than it sounds)
Is that a weird American thing? Serious, I have never heard that it is "gay" to eat dessert. However, since gay means happy in proper English, go for it.
Who eats Wine Gums? Real men don't give a s*** about societal norms. I've even been drinking in gay bars and nothing happened to me! Well, apart from having a great time! Sweets rule.
I recently saw “If you’re a straight man and go see the Barbie movie you’re 100% a beta” I thought, “I’m so sorry that someone called you a beta once and that ever since you’ve been critical of your fellow man by hamfistedly dissecting everyone’s choices through an arbitrary and nonsensical social hierarchy platform that only exists to a few and matters to less! Bruh, you could do with some content that boldly and artistically tackles some questions of who we are in the universe, society and what real support and true friendship looks like. Maybe go see Barbie?”
I've no interest whatsoever in the Barbie movie, but I'm not about to tell someone else what movies to watch.
My daughter who is incredibly anti-pink, as a thing girls should be forced to wear. Went to see it with her mum, she really enjoyed it and was really surprised by it. "It had depth, but was just also really pink"
Load More Replies...Not only did my husband go on a double date to see Barbie with our daughter & her husband, but he also dressed up as Ken... willingly.
I'm going to be watching it with my dying grandma because she loves Barbie. And I don't think I've ever written a more manly sentence.
This straight man who never played with dolls found the Barbie movie to be brilliant and hilarious.
If you’re so insecure about your masculinity that you think a goddamned movie could make you gay——something that just IS about you, not something you can catch, either from another person or a movie. Real real men are confident enough to not only go see Barbie, but also to take their daughters to see the next Disney Princess movie dressed as Prince Charming, FFS.
There is no such thing as alpha or beta in homo sapiens sapiens. We have all this gray matter surrounding our brain stems in order to control them.
From what I've heard this whole "alpha male & beta male " stemmed from the behavior in wolf packs. Fun fact, there aren't any beta and alpha males in any wolf packs. In the wild, researchers have found that most wolf packs are simply families, led by a breeding pair, and bloody duels for supremacy are rare. ---------------https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/is-the-alpha-wolf-idea-a-myth/ -------- here's the credit of information
Load More Replies...I just saw it yesterday with my wife. It was a very, very strange movie. I understood the points about women, and men, that it was making, and in no way felt challenged or emasculated by it.
Pick anything that Andrew tate prick says and it’s probably gunna be up there with the most stupid
Hopefully he'll soon be in a Romanian prison. For rape and human trafficking. What an absolute s**t of a human.
I hope the other prisoners make him their "beta".
Load More Replies...Andrew Tate has some excellent lessons if you want to be a petty, misogynistic, sex trafficking POS.
I just read an article about how some younger men are having a struggle understand what it means to be male in our ever-changing society. I get it, I am a boomer, so I know roles and rules are very different in 2023 as opposed to say, 1973! The person interviewed in that article named Jordon Peterson and Andrew Tate as very negative influences in this fight/discussion/crisis. (Whatever you want to name it.). She said she felt Peterson had initially had his heart in the right place and kind of got derailed. Tate, as far as she was concerned, had never been anything but hateful and misogynistic. That struck me as an accurate analysis.
My former boss would die on the hill of "real men don't use rolling suitcases." He'd sooner throw out his shoulder carrying a heavy duffel bag than ever be caught dead rolling a suitcase through an airport.
Edit: forgot to add he also thinks "neck pillows are fruity" and can't stand when men wear them around their neck on planes. Also, re: the comments about benefits of hiking backpacks, I don't think I ever saw him sport a two-strap. Fellas, is it gay to have even weight distribution on your shoulders?
This obsession with portraying some kind of strong image is more about hiding insecurity than anything else. And I don’t really like those neck pillows because of the bubbly texture of their stuffings, but how come a luggage or pillow option defines a person's sexuality? SMH.
It’s also way more about successfully impressing other men than it ever is—-hell, ever could be—-at successfully impressing women.
Load More Replies...He’s going to have some serious neck, shoulder, and back pain in later years, perhaps!
Your boss is obsessed with rolling suitcases and talking about fruity pillows? He should embrace his inner unreal man
I actually do use a duffel bag compared to a roller wheel. Reason - the duffel bag was cheaper. But now that they gave us a roller suit case as a gift for signing up a credit card, guess who's rolling? 🤣
It looks like he's on a journey to prove his manliness to himself. Sometimes it takes time to realize that true strength comes from embracing what is real, not outdated ideals.
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I was told that really men never look at their nails with their palm down and would only ever look at their nails with their palm up and fingers curled.
I gotta wonder how secure in your masculinity you've got to be to spend time even thinking about the right way to look at your nails.
What if they're having a tantrum and slap the table and accidentally catch sight of their nails and suddenly - poof! - not a real man.
when Stan takes Steve to a 'straight convention' and shows him exactly this
Load More Replies...Having to constantly police every tiny little thing you do throughout the day must get exhausting for these "alpha" types.
Seriously. It's like they're in a weird abusive relationship with themselves.
Load More Replies...It's a slippery slope. First, he's looking at his nails palm down, and what is next...? He'll be hugging his kids and eating bananas??
Real men don't look at their nails at all. If it gets too long, they rip them out and proceed to beat their chest until the blood clots then they go about their day.
Actually, this is probably something half-remembered from "Huckleberry Finn"; this and similar behavior reveal that he is a boy, trying to pass as a girl.
"Real men don't let women be on top during sex, because being on the bottom is a submissive position" Fellas? Is it gay to have sex with a woman?
Fkn-A! Bottom is best because different leverage and hands free to boot!
Load More Replies...Real men don't have sex with women, as it lets too much femininity into the room. Real men only have sex with men.
The Romans preferred “cowgirl:” macho men expected that the woman put in all the work to serve his pleasure. Cite: A History of Private Life, Volume I: From Pagan Rome to Byzantium. Authors: Paul Veyne, Arthur Goldhammer, Phillippe Ariès.
There is nothing wrong with letting your cowgirl have some fun being on top! edit spelling
That's true for me... if you don't let me ride you're not getting any
Load More Replies...I must be super gay, i've only had sex with women, and I prefer the bottom.
"Real men don't speak French" When we were kids, my mother would speak to us in French and my dad in English. By pure coincidence, every other bilingual couple we knew was doing it the same way around. So when my little brother was 4, he decided men spoke English and women spoke French. He still understood French perfectly, but he refused to speak it. He'd also burst into tears when he heard an adult speaking the wrong language for their gender. My mother told the school about this when she registered him for kindergarten. They put him in a class with a male francophone teacher and he got over himself pretty quickly.
Funny. I thought most French men, at the very least, would speak French. Silly of me, I know.
This is actually pretty funny. Kids will come to some wild conclusions based on their experiences.
I thought dogs and cats were the same species, and the dogs were male and the cats female. My mom always referred to dogs as "he" and cats as "she".
Load More Replies...This is a child's misunderstanding. At this age they are trying to understand and compartmentalise the world. What they observed was women speak French, men do not. The conclusion was 'I am male, therefore I should not speak French.' Thankfully when the child was shown evidence to the contrary they revised their conclusion.
"I speak Spanish to God, Italian to women, French to men and German to my horse!". - Charles V, Holy Roman Emperor, 1519–56; King of Spain from 1516.
As so as the Belgians, the French-Canadians, the Martinicans, the Haitians... Good Lord! That's a lot of gays!
Load More Replies...In my family, my Mother's generation weren't allowed to learn French because the older folks wanted a way to speak in secret.
So, what about every man in a French speaking country? They seem to be able to enthusiastically make more French speaking people, and do it well enough to get the reputation of being very romantic. Sooooo….
Well, at least this one was a kid that made an assumption based on what he saw.
Real men don't lift under (insert weight). Everyone has to start somewhere d**k head. I have been lifting for years but when I see a new kid try lifting crazy heavy with bad form I warn him it's a good way to get hurt. If they don't listen then that's on them.
Have to start somewhere. Even the biggest guys in the gym started out small and perhaps even weak.
You could permanently hurt yourself trying to lift a ridiculous amount of weight your first time, and end up not being able to lift any, ever.
Also, some people do low weight, high reps, depending on their goal (and what kind of exercises they enjoy).
My friends once introduced me to this guy who was talking REALLY LOUDLY.
I thought maybe he didn't realize how loud he was being so I said "you're a little loud."
Dude said "real men talk loud. Chicks like that."
I did not like that.
Wow, I hate it when men shout into my ear, it also annoys other people in public and seems a bit bogan to me rather then "manly".
I abhor loud voices, unless the situation warrants yelling. You can yell when I’m far away from you, and you’re trying to tell me there’s danger ahead, but if we’re sitting next to each other in a quiet public place, and especially in my home, then you and your loud a*s voice can f**k right off away from me. Permanently.
“Women love being screamed at” has got to be one of the strangest gender stereotypes I’ve ever heard. (I’m a cishet woman with sensory issues so…no)
When I was working fast food as a teen, some guy came in asking for "some chick" that worked there. I deliberately misunderstood and kept explaining we do not employ chickens until he finally said it correctly. Such a good time.
Especially not baby chickens! There are laws against that
Load More Replies...Ok so based on this a real man is a guy who: Is sunburned. Smells because he doesn’t wash his a*s. Screams what he wants with very basic language. Oh wow the lady must be swooning
Don't forget expects the woman to do all the cooking becausehe can'tfeed himself.
And yet some (many?) women buy into this. How f****d up is that?
Load More Replies...Nope; this gal finds his lack of good hygiene and controlling behavior repulsive!
No kidding. There was an argument online about circumcision. Many argued it was a hygiene thing. Good god, just wash yourself with soap and water. No problem. Men have been doing that since soap was invented. Sometimes Americans just gross me out.
Load More Replies...Swooning? More like fainting because of THE STINK. Guys, please wash your äss
And 'real men' wonder why women feel so relaxed around intune / gay men . We do what the heck brings us pleasure and emotion, we live longer, smell better, can engage in a real conversation and we have less stress. We often last longer than the husbands too lol That why she keeps us in the divorce ... :-D
Maybe they like their @ssholes itchy. Seems gay to me.
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Real men don't love their women as much as or more than she loves him. He has to always love her less and be less emotional to hold more power in the relationship.
Why does a man have to hold more power in the relationship? Why does either partner have have more power in the relationship?
If you think the words "more power" and "relationship" go together, you've got bigger problems.
"Read the Instructions"
Yes, it's so gay for a man to want his new desk or grill or fooz ball table to be properly put together.
Especially when the item cost $1300, and your son in law puts it together for you whilst ignoring the instructions. My solid wood futon is currently stuck in the bed configuration.
Load More Replies...Sorry, I am a male and a Chemist (US Chemistry, not UK Pharmacy Chemist). I can solidly assure you and I a "real" man and I thoroughly "Read the Instructions". If I didn't, I suppose I would be a "real" dead man many times over. OR if I was a UK Pharmacy Chemist, I suppose I would have killed a number of people by now.
Oh heck yeah. Looking at you retro galaxy explorer and technic motorized excavator
Load More Replies...As a professional Handyman, I've lost count of the number of times I've been called out to 'rescue' a self assembly item that 'Hubby' swears blind has parts missing or made wrong. Also, I make sure that said Hubby is not home when I call out. (Hint: usually because they didn't read the instructions)
To be fair, as a woman I rarely read the instructions. I just watch the YouTube videos much easier to understand. Looking at you boltless shelving instructions….
Because there's no chance of missing important details or steps and wasting valuable time to correct the mistake...
Also saves a whole lot guessing if you need a default IP for network setup!
Load More Replies...does anyone know that experiment with how men and women read instructions?? they were testing like 10 men and 10 women. Everyone got a list with very weird instructions, that the man all did. The women all read the complete list first and then sat down doing nothing. Turns out that the first instruction said "read the whole list before you start" then all kinds of silly instructions followed like dance like a monkey and put on a dress, and the last instruction was "now sit down and do nothing" All the men fell for it, none of the women did :-D
Once saw a woman on twitter say something like “if a man is too eager when the free bread gets to the table that’s sus” and I was just blown away by that one
Amen, that warm bread hits the table, it's grain over.
Load More Replies...That OP twitter woman is sus. Bread is delicious...free bread even more so!
Load More Replies...To make Christian fundamentalism more accessible to their homophobic demographic, the Gospels have been rewritten from bread and wine to Jesus and his bros firing up the grill and hoisting some brewskis.
Bïtch I love bread. My wife can’t have any due to a gluten allergy but I will eat the fûck out of some rolls or toast.
I keep the bread for the sauce, unless it's a posh restaurant with fancy flavoured butter and herby bread.
I feel like people are just making things up randomly now... here's one- "real men only drive one handed on the steering wheel" "real mems favorite colors are red or black" REAL MEN DON'T BUY INTO ANY OF THIS B******T!!
Free is free. What the heck does free bread have to do with masculinity?
Wannabe tough guy: "Real men don't cook... Only women and gay men cook."
Me: "What about male Chef's like Gordon Ramsay?"
Response A) They're closeted gay men.
Or
Response B) A Chef is a paid position so it doesn't count.
Oooh, what about barbecue? That must really funk with their heads.
Hmm. My dad taught me to cook. He was an army cook. I wonder how he managed to father 5 kids if he was gay...
Is your father Gordon Ramsay? Lol Because I was about to comment that he must be so deep in the closet he's in Narnia because he has five kids.
Load More Replies...A real man learns to cook so a real man doesn't have to go hungry (like an infant child) when no-one else is around to cook for his dumb-a*s self.
Perhaps this dude knows something about Gordon Ramsey that we don't, or much more likely he's just an idiot
Have long hair. I don't understand it at all. If Eddie van Halen can have long hair, then I can too.
All the pictures of Jesus I've seen portray Him with long hair. Do 'Real Men' believe He was gay then?
The case has been made. https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/belief/2012/apr/20/was-jesus-gay-probably
Load More Replies...As a young person, I was so confused by parents of other kids who would have a picture of "blue-eyed Jesus" with a beard and shoulder-length hair on their living room wall and then insist that Christian men have to be clean shaven with crew cuts.
Same energy as "true Christians" who do the exact opposite of Jesus's teachings of peace, compassion and charity.
Load More Replies...My son's hair, this was after a haircut. If anyone is interested, he is sitting in the driver's cab of a London Underground train. The driver let him sit there before the journey started. Hair-64d73...7-jpeg.jpg
I don’t care if it’s “unmanly”, my hair is down past my shoulders and I like it that way
Love dudes with long hair. And cats, too. My boyfriend looks like a Scandinavian power metal band member and I'm super into that. It's manly to me.
Load More Replies...I used to have long hair and then the creeping hairline struck.
We were discussing colonial attire in the British colonies on the North American continent in the 1600s and 1700s. One of my high school students asked, in all honesty, why they all dressed so gay. He didn't mean, looking back on it today, the style from 400 years ago looks gay compared to our modern style. He meant, through all of time, only gay men dress like that. This is same kid that said there were no gay men in the (US) military in WWII because "they didn't do that back then". Like, gay had only been around 60 years?
Load More Replies...Real men don't put others first. I have a big family and a lot of my siblings have problems. I do my best to help them, even if it means putting their needs ahead of mine. My ex-fiance thought this made me weak. A real man doesn't take care of other people, he puts himself first and takes what he wants. Going out of my way to help my brother, lending him money when he needed it, spending time giving him advice, made me a little b***h in her eyes. We're no longer together.
This sounds more like his ex preferred he spend his money on her instead of helping his brother. That could be a valid complaint, especially if “ lot of my siblings have problems” = “a lot of my siblings are substance-abusing, work-shy moochers.” But accusations of homosexuality as a go-to manipulation tactic is, of course, not just a red flag. The flag is checkered: it’s over.
I've heard real men don't drink tea.
I second that. My burly manly man British working class husband soundly disagrees that real men don’t drink tea. He drinks gallons of it—-and with milk and sugar too!
Load More Replies...Then I am not a real man and I don’t really care, nothing will prevent me from getting my tea ☕️
Earl Grey for me when I'm not drinking coffee. Plus iced tea all summer long.
Load More Replies...I thought in England that it was required for everyone to drink tea.
Not everybody, foreigners are exempt until they have been resident for 6 months. After that if they are not drinking tea, then they will never be civilised!
Load More Replies...This would come as a surprise to a lot of Victoria Cross winners.
"Real men never say no to sex"
A real man wouldn't ask, as that's gay. But the real man should obviously still agree.
Load More Replies...Have done a number of times. Rarely to anyone I was in a long term relationship with but a few times over the years where the woman was willing but there were other reasons I realized it wasn't a good idea. And to summarize - I mean not a good idea for the woman. I didn't have protection, or she'd been drinking some and I don't mix chemicals with first time sex. Another was just a situation where I thought the girl was super cute but I knew I was leaving town (military) so a relationship would not be fair. Stuff like that.
Oh god, no one show them the sexual consent is like tea video then…. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZwvrxVavnQ
These 'real' men probably wouldn't get the opportunity
My ex husband used to say real men don't eat popsicles.
Edit to add: my current husband loves popsicles, ex husband was a POS who never got to experience the joy of an icy treat on a hot summer day in the south.
It's fun to see if you can out-do your gf in erotic slurping all over your popsicle.
Load More Replies...There's an episode of Roseanne where Dan is getting himself a popsicle out of the freezer. You can't get any more manly than Dan Conner.
That means more for us, and less for the senseless smooth-brains who think it's feminine to eat popsicles.
Load More Replies...One of my high school friends had a dad like this. One time, he made some comment about popsicles being gay, so the moment the opportunity arose (pool party), one of my other guy friends made sure to eat a popsicle in front of him extremely ~sexually~ and I had no idea a person could turn that shade of red.
Sounds like her ex was an idiot on two counts: he never got to enjoy popsicles in Summer, and he lost her to a better man.
Use umbrellas.
...does water go right through ur skin? R u ok?
Load More Replies...I like walking in the rain. Well, sitting in the rain now. Does that mean I'm a real man?
Major Allison Digby Tatham-Warter DSO was a British Army officer (Parachute Regiment) who fought in WWII and was famed for wearing a bowler hat and carrying an umbrella into battle. During the battle of Arnhem, Digby wore his maroon beret instead of a helmet and waved his umbrella while walking about the defences despite heavy mortar fire. When the Germans started using tanks to cross the bridge, Digby led a bayonet charge against them wearing a bowler hat. He later disabled a German armoured car with his umbrella, incapacitating the driver by shoving the umbrella through the car's observational slit and poking the driver in the eye.
The bowler was originally intended as a practical hat that gave protection to the hard - it's hard and pretty rigid. It was popular among people riding to hounds when fox hunting because of the protection it offered. So not quite the grade of a military helmet, but a more sensible choice than you might imagine.
Load More Replies...FILIPINOS! lol. Was going to purchase an umbrella during my last trip to PI. My Filipino relatives informed me men don't use umbrellas - just the women. Which I thought was totally silly but I complied to avoid making waves. EDIT to say - that after that I kept my eye open and over there that does seem to be true. Never saw a single man with an umbrella.
Seattleites don't use umbrellas (unless it's torrential rain)... an "unspoken" rule 🌦 ☂️
Does Seattle have high winds that goes along with the rain. Because that's why people in Perth, Australia tended to do without them.
Load More Replies...When I was 14 or so, I got my left ear pierced. An older cousin of mine worked at Piercing Pagoda in the mall (mid 90s), and he did it for me. When my father noticed, he was beside himself and went on and on about me being a sissy. I removed it right away. Anyway, it turns out that Dad was a self-hating closet-case. Still is.
Beavis and Butt-Head (of course) had a whole episode about that right down to screaming in horror after the clerk told them they (self-pierced) the "wrong" ears.
Load More Replies...I've had two in my left and two in my right since I was 15. And let me tell you, I'm of that age where only "pirates and pooftahs" had earrings as a general rule. IDC, they looked amazing. Thankfully it's not remotely a thing anymore and we've all got them.
The pirates and pooftahs line alone gets a green arrow, lol. I'm of the same age and I know exactly what you mean.
Load More Replies...I’d actually love to get my ears pierced, I love how earrings look
Go for it, once they've properly healed you don't need to wear them all the time and they are dead easy to care for.
Load More Replies...you should tell him that you wanna be a pirate, that is a manly thing.
Covered the bases got both ears and wore little skull earrings with a dagger dangling from the left one. Had the added benefit of pissing the parents off
“Left is right [hetero] and right is wrong.” Stupid mantra for ignorant people.
I saw a video of a woman saying “Real men don’t eat peanut butter and jelly” and I was flabbergasted.
Yeah, IDGAF, if it tastes good, I'm eating it. Tomahawk steak or a PB&J sandwich or the fruitiest, prettiest dessert...get in my belly!
I don't even get this one. Is it because of the nuts? "Real men" don't like the taste of nuts? Whatever the reason, it's dumb.
My husband loves PB&J. Has to be on squishy white bread like Wonder.
It was Elvis' favorite sandwich! With banana! So he was gay? 🤔
According to those nonsensical numskulls, yes. To us regular people, no.
Load More Replies...Sheesh! Things like PB&J, Tomato and cheese on bread with mayo and pepper... I live for that stuff!
I don't like grape jelly so I don't like PB&J. But do like BP&SJ SJ stands for strawberry jam.
Real men don't wear safety equipment.
See that one-eyed man over there with the bad limp? The one that used to be in construction? He’s a real man!
So 'Real Men' who believe this would never get work in the construction industry then
Real men don`t use a welding shield. They let their eyes get burned like true alphas
Load More Replies...Saw our grounds guy weed trimming, not even sunglasses. YES I called him out. Won't be my fault he is wearing a patch.
Try roofing on anything over a 5/12 pitch without ropes. A friend in Germany told me his partner, while working on a red tile roof, lost it and the last he saw of him alive was when he slid over the edge. And then there was that time...
Real men don’t tell their wives/girlfriends they’re going to go somewhere/do something they just do it. And if they don’t like it that’s too bad. Like dude what?
Presumably real men get reported missing a lot if they just wander off without telling anyone where they're going or when they'll be back.
My friend's boyfriend is like this, he also says he only does things he wants to do and if there is nothing in it for him then he won't do it.
You don't have to tell me where you are 100% of the time, but if we're supposed to meet somewhere and you're going to be late, a message from you is appreciated. 😉
This is how to: Sleep on the couch, become single, spend nights outside with the dog. (Edit: The dog sleeps on your side of the bed while YOU sleep outside!)
Because yeah, we really don't want to know where to start looking when they go missing. (Joking)
Okay? What if you want to do something without your partner knowing? They don´t have to know everything you do at any time, sometimes you just wanna be alone for a bit. the attitude described in the post sounds kinda weird/rude, yes, But the opposite, telling them every time you leave is also weird.
Well you can atleast say that you are going somewhere and will be back at *insert time*
Load More Replies...Real men don't use straws lol. I've always thought like, no, "real men" drink however they damn well please
The entire point is that nothing is fruity. The actual fvck. Nothing is “gay” other than actually being gay.
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Wear sunscreen.
REAL men don't get skin cancer. Melonomia only attacks betas/s/
Load More Replies...Apparently so. They absolutely love the look of the crispy lobster. Well, while they're busy unleashing their inner lobster, the rest of us are here, enjoying life without the extra help of UV radiation.
Load More Replies...I'm a guy and even though I don't burn at all and usually don't wear sunscreen cause I'm lazy and my friends make fun of me when I don't have a tan, I put it on when I'm working at my job at a summer camp so the kids have a role model of a counselor putting on sunscreen
I think I saw 'real men' in BP article few days ago. AI generated pictures of sunburned british people
"Real men don't apologize"
Yesh that is just dumb. Even the animal kingdom often understands apology.
Load More Replies...Almost got it right. It's actually 'a$$holes don't apologise'.
I'm gay and have a husband, and he don't apologize. OMG I'm married to a st8 man :(
True. Had a relationship with the father of my children for 14 years, he seemed to be a liberated man, but deep down he was a real one. Patriarchal on top of that. Never said sorry for anything
Just no. In the words of my late Dad, who was 5'7" and a whopping 145 lb.: It takes a big man to admit when he's wrong. Any other way of looking things is just living like a a*****e.
*... Don't eat sweet things like candy or chocolate, it's gay.* I f*****g love chocolate so I'm probably the biggest gaylord out there.
Agreed! Real men know that chocolate isn't about gender; it's about making life sweeter one bite at a time.
Load More Replies...sounds to me like someone's a bit jealous that i got chocolate and they don't ;)
My brother downing a 39 pack of oreos and 3 whole chocolate bars on a 20 minute car trip would disagree with you
Congratulations, OP. Does that title come with a pay raise?
My dads a big, burly, construction worker and ALWAYS has brownies lolol
Let me put it this way: Me and my bros are about a whisker away to 40 years-old but whenever we pass a convenience store or candy shop, we just basically go "CANDY!!!". Will never be ashamed of that, ever.
What I hate when it comes to chocolate is that sometimes the really dark ones, with like 80% cocoa or something are marketed as "Men´s chocolate" while white chocolate is supposedly "Women´s chocolate". Or chips, where the mens flavor is like "carolina ghost pepper" or some other super spicy sh*t while the womens flavor is something interesting sounding like "Butter chicken curry". I am Guy and I hate dark chocolate and spicy stuff. Not that these labels stop me from buying the "girly" stuff, but it still annoys me.
Real men dont drink fruity drink, only beers and hard liquor. F**k off. I drink something if it taste good and i will die before doing 50 differents type of faces just to swallow something that taste like satan b******e and batteries acids
I'm a woman and I love beer and mead. And Gammel Dansk! I always hated when I had to defend my beverage choices to ppl when I was going out. Defending my choices as well as being praised for being a "real"/strong woman for knowing exactly what beer I like. What the actual f is up with that!?!?
So, what about men who don´t drink alcohol at all? Are they the super gays?
Space bag and cranberry juice was one of my all time favorites and warm dr pepper and rum. 9 years sober thankfully
There's this lychee beer that's really good and it's the only alcohol I really drink (I'm 14 haha) is that a fruity drink or a beer
So I will say I do like a really good sipping tequila.... and I mean it's usually gonna cost you but if done right it is very smooth and great over ice on a hot day. BUT... I also love me a pina colada, or a paloma as well.
"wash their a*s because it makes them gay"
Washing it doesn’t change anyone’s orientation. But I must comment on that picture: I’d never do it with a tooth brush!
Judging by the discoloration of the bristles on the left toothbrush this was not an isolated incident either
Load More Replies...The whole body needs to be washed, a**hole, a**crack and all. It has nothing to do with sexuality, it has everything to do with being as clean as possible.
Good hygiene and sexuality have a causal relationship how? What are these men and women who made such odd statements to the OPs thinking?
Does it make them gay if they wash their junk too? Cuz I bet they wash their junk. At least they should.
Since when is it gay to touch your own body? When I wash myself does that make me a lesbian?
Owwwww... if you don't and you women doesn't want to go down on you, maybe that stinky a*% is why
enjoy candles
Just ask any ER doctor or nurse how many of the foreign object removals involved 'straight' men.
Load More Replies...Me - enjoying a nice bubble bath soak in my big tub using three tea candles for light because the light is more relaxing than the harsh overhead light. These felt the best after spending the day doing "MANLY" work on my property and my whole body was sore. One time I even used a bath bomb someone had gifted me. Still didn't turn me gay. LOL
Oh my God! So, before the invention of electricity, does that mean the whole world was gay?!? 😵
Wtf. Nothing is better and sexier than setting up some mood/candles. Spiced tobacco mi is the best
Theyre much better than a spray air freshener for eliminating odors - in bathroom, kitchen…
Candles are ok, but they make me nervous. Not any 'gay' or 'feminine' connotations, just the fire risk.
“Sleep on their stomachs”
This one gets me. I've done a lot of time in county lockup and I sleep in my bunk however I like. No one has ever even mentioned anything close to this.
Say what? How are you even going to know if you have slept on your stomach when you are asleep when you sleep?
1. I'm not thinking about my position when i'm asleep, because i'm asleep. 2. If anyone is judging me on my sleeping position, what the hell are they doing sitting around watching me sleep?
I don't know how anyone can sleep on their stomach. It is so uncomfortable for me. One summer I got a horrible sunburn on my back so I was forced to sleep on my stomach and I really didn't get much sleep.
Side or stomach all the way. The only people sleeping on their backs are comatose in ICU or restraint psychopaths
Prison advice.. Don't sleep on your belly if you don't know your cellie.
Fair do's. If I sleep on a guys stomach, my wife might start asking questions...
Real men don't wear lotion or chapstick.
Then he can forget any woman ever wanting to kiss his nasty, dry, crackly, bleeding lips.
Oh yeah baby... I love when you touch a man and it snows
Load More Replies...I consider myself a real man and I do a lot of these things so called real men don't do. .
My late husband was lotion-adverse but he did use Carmex. When he developed diabetes in his later years he started using lotion. He never wanted to use lotion before then because after you got out of the shower you were 'done'. He didn't want to be 'wasting time' doing something he saw as unimportant.
Try living in the great white north without chapstick, your lips would look like crusty dried out cherry jello.
Apparently I'm a man. That's going to surprise my husband
Load More Replies...The opposite of manly isn't gay, it's unmanly!!! Disturbing to see how many 'progressive' men in this list and the reactions still seem to think gay and unmanly are the same thing.
Shagging a bloke is one of the manliest activities there is. It's literally all man.
Load More Replies...The real men don’t wash their a*s is the one that scares me the most. Like, umm, that’s basic hygiene. No one of any gender gonna want to be around you smelling like boo-boo 💩.
And even worse, expecting a lover to venture down there when they haven't bothered wiping their b******e.
Load More Replies...so REAL MEN™️ are dirty, joyless, loveless, angry lumps of fear. gotcha gotcha.
to a point. Men can't be biological mothers. that whole lack of a uterus makes it impossible.
Load More Replies...Having cats is a weird one. People's odd prejudice against cats in general is effing weird. Another weird one is enjoying Disneyland or theme parks. My boyf and I love it, me more than him (I'm a woman) but like he's been given s**t for wanting to go with me since it's a place for girls and babies. Actually shaming Disney adults at all is messed up too. It's kind of why I prefer Tokyo Disney, there are so many couples there and people of all ages, I never felt shamed.
The cats one is because you can’t have control over cats like you can dogs. Cats aren’t “submissive” enough to be “masculine”
Load More Replies...Another daily dose of a human stupidity. My eyeballs rolled back 360 degrees reading all this b******t
180 you mean? 360 would be all the back to the front again.
Load More Replies...Just sharing a fun thing my dad taught me when I first cut my hair short. It always shut up anyone being an asshoIe: “your heteronormative polemic is infantile.” (Your sexist assumption/statement is immature and childish)
Apparently I'm a man. That's going to surprise my husband
Load More Replies...The opposite of manly isn't gay, it's unmanly!!! Disturbing to see how many 'progressive' men in this list and the reactions still seem to think gay and unmanly are the same thing.
Shagging a bloke is one of the manliest activities there is. It's literally all man.
Load More Replies...The real men don’t wash their a*s is the one that scares me the most. Like, umm, that’s basic hygiene. No one of any gender gonna want to be around you smelling like boo-boo 💩.
And even worse, expecting a lover to venture down there when they haven't bothered wiping their b******e.
Load More Replies...so REAL MEN™️ are dirty, joyless, loveless, angry lumps of fear. gotcha gotcha.
to a point. Men can't be biological mothers. that whole lack of a uterus makes it impossible.
Load More Replies...Having cats is a weird one. People's odd prejudice against cats in general is effing weird. Another weird one is enjoying Disneyland or theme parks. My boyf and I love it, me more than him (I'm a woman) but like he's been given s**t for wanting to go with me since it's a place for girls and babies. Actually shaming Disney adults at all is messed up too. It's kind of why I prefer Tokyo Disney, there are so many couples there and people of all ages, I never felt shamed.
The cats one is because you can’t have control over cats like you can dogs. Cats aren’t “submissive” enough to be “masculine”
Load More Replies...Another daily dose of a human stupidity. My eyeballs rolled back 360 degrees reading all this b******t
180 you mean? 360 would be all the back to the front again.
Load More Replies...Just sharing a fun thing my dad taught me when I first cut my hair short. It always shut up anyone being an asshoIe: “your heteronormative polemic is infantile.” (Your sexist assumption/statement is immature and childish)
