“AITA For Losing It After My Wife Wanted My Daughter To Stop Using The Bathroom In The House?”
What happens in the bathroom stays in the bathroom. Even if you share that space with your entire family, you don’t need to know what anyone else is doing in there. Just keep it clean, always flush and wash your hands, and please don’t splash any water on the mirror.
According to one mother, however, it’s not appropriate to throw away period products in a bathroom shared by all members of the family. Below, you’ll find the full story that a frustrated father shared on Reddit, detailing how he had to defend his daughter’s right to use the bathroom, as well as some of the replies readers left him.
Despite how natural menstruation is, periods are still very stigmatized
Image credits: AmparoGV / Envato (not the actual photo)
But this dad refused to comply with his wife’s demands after she wanted to ban his daughter from using their family bathroom
Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages / Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: AITADE33434
Women menstruate for about 40 years on average
Image credits: Sora Shimazaki / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Periods are completely natural and normal. Starting anywhere between age 10 and 16, everyone in a female body will start menstruating. Then, these periods will occur about once a month every single month until menopause starts. Of course, women may skip a month here or there due to hormonal changes, weight fluctuations, or skip many months at a time due to pregnancies. But according to the Office on Women’s Health, the average woman will have her period for about 40 years.
Considering how frequently women get their periods and how inevitable they are in about half the population’s lives, one would think that talking about menstruation would be as normal as discussing taking a shower or washing your face. But for some reason, periods are still wrapped up in a lot of stigma. As far as where negative beliefs around periods came from, it seems like they’ve been around since Biblical times or longer.
In fact, Leviticus mentions women being “unclean” during menstruation. Unfortunately, many people haven’t changed their views very much on the topic over thousands of years. One 2022 survey from Plan International found that over a third of boys believe periods should be kept secret, and over half associate them with the word “dirty.” A third also believe periods are “embarrassing” and “disgusting.”
Many men and women still hold harmful beliefs about periods
Image credits: Karolina Kaboompics / Pexels (not the actual photo)
70% of boys surveyed also reported that they’ve heard other boys or men make derogatory comments about periods. In fact, a quarter of boys surveyed in the Netherlands noted that they had heard a male teacher make such comments. About a third of boys and men also consider it embarrassing to buy or walk to the bathroom with period products.
It’s heartbreaking to know that girls must grow up hearing the same negative comments about periods and internalize shame around something that’s perfectly normal. We already have a self-esteem crisis among young girls, as only 55% of girls between 5th and 12th grade report feeling confident. The last thing girls should be taught is that they should also feel gross or embarrassed by a healthy human function.
When it comes to normalizing menstruation, Verywell Mind recommends discussing periods openly and without shame. We don’t need to use euphemisms when talking about periods or refer to them in vague terms. There’s no need to feel embarrassed when telling someone that you’re on your period or try to hide the fact that you’re buying tampons. If anyone feels uncomfortable, that’s their problem not yours.
Normalizing menstruation requires open, honest conversations without shame or embarrassment
Image credits: KATRIN BOLOVTSOVA / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Schools and workplaces should also make women more comfortable by making period products accessible to all. Place them in the bathrooms or provide a designated spot where women can pick them up as often as they need them. Make sure all bathroom stalls have trash cans, and allow students and workers ample bathroom breaks. Some companies and countries are even allowing women “menstrual leave” from work while experiencing extremely painful periods.
By normalizing periods, we not only encourage girls and women to have higher self-esteem, we also make them safer and healthier. If no one ever talks about periods, how are young girls supposed to know what’s normal and how to use sanitary products? It can even be dangerous to use tampons without being warned of the risks of toxic shock syndrome, and it’s important to change out pads frequently to minimize the risk of developing an infection.
We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. How would you have handled this issue if you were in the dad’s shoes? And have you ever felt shame around your menstrual cycle? Feel free to share, and then if you’d like to read another Bored Panda piece discussing similar themes, look no further than right here!
Many readers took the father’s side, noting that his wife’s request is unreasonable
However, some readers thought that both parents could have handled the situation better
Poll Question
Thanks! Check out the results:
Because this BS is coming from a fellow woman, somehow makes it more frustrating. At some point, this woman was made to feel embarrassment or shame around her periods, and she never learned better. Luckily, this young girl has a father who is more reasonable and level-headed.
It's even worse than that, she has cling to that shame and is determined to pass it on to her son. Clearly she's not in a relationship where she's shamed for her body, and she's just doubling down.
Load More Replies...My son is 2 and he knows that periods exist and that I use pads and tampons once a month. Of course his understanding of the topic is limited, but I don't hide the products and he asks questions about them. Why would I make a problem out of that?
Me too! My son is nearly 9 now and I can‘t wait for when he will have sex ed in school next year.
Load More Replies...Bury them in the yard. Make it a legit funeral rite with a wake afterwards. Maybe even send out invitations to the closest family. Really draw attention to the event of getting rid of a tampon/pad. /s
Dad should throw the girl a whole period party. Seriously though. And ensure step mom is invited lol (if you’ve never heard of them, look them up. There’s a comedian (edit: the comedian was Bert Kreischer, watch the video if you can, you won’t regret it lol) that was on a talk show that tells about throwing his daughter a period party and it’s hilarious. But also, tons of people are doing it these days and it’s awesome!!)
Load More Replies...Because this BS is coming from a fellow woman, somehow makes it more frustrating. At some point, this woman was made to feel embarrassment or shame around her periods, and she never learned better. Luckily, this young girl has a father who is more reasonable and level-headed.
It's even worse than that, she has cling to that shame and is determined to pass it on to her son. Clearly she's not in a relationship where she's shamed for her body, and she's just doubling down.
Load More Replies...My son is 2 and he knows that periods exist and that I use pads and tampons once a month. Of course his understanding of the topic is limited, but I don't hide the products and he asks questions about them. Why would I make a problem out of that?
Me too! My son is nearly 9 now and I can‘t wait for when he will have sex ed in school next year.
Load More Replies...Bury them in the yard. Make it a legit funeral rite with a wake afterwards. Maybe even send out invitations to the closest family. Really draw attention to the event of getting rid of a tampon/pad. /s
Dad should throw the girl a whole period party. Seriously though. And ensure step mom is invited lol (if you’ve never heard of them, look them up. There’s a comedian (edit: the comedian was Bert Kreischer, watch the video if you can, you won’t regret it lol) that was on a talk show that tells about throwing his daughter a period party and it’s hilarious. But also, tons of people are doing it these days and it’s awesome!!)
Load More Replies...
49
105