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Person Starts A Thread Asking If He’s Missing Something About Young People Having So Much Money, And People Delivered Their Answers
There are many things in our world that cause us to wonder. Why do birds fly? Why is 42 the answer to everything? What's the secret ingredient to Krabby Patties? These questions remind us that there are no silly questions, only silly answers.
For this very reason, a subreddit called r/NoStupidQuestions was made. Just recently, a Reddit user by the name of No-job-no-money created a thread wondering why are there so many young people flaunting their money these days, and how do they manage it, and the question sparked a vigorous debate that reached 9.3k upvotes and generated 1.5k comments. And below you'll find what people had to say about the subject.
Though the thread originally started on Reddit, you can also add your answers to this post too!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
The US is grossly unfair in terms of starting wealth. I don't hate rich kids: they didn't choose to be born rich. But we lived on different planets, and I hate the society that punishes kids for not being born rich.
I grew up on the bottom end. Single mom, with no child support, no job, but with untreated mental health issues. One bedroom apt for three people. Evicted every couple of years. Never enough money for food (not even the unhealthy kind) or clothes without holes. Beg, borrow and steal. No money for doctors, dentists or other fancy services. Sometimes no money for electricity. No fancy luxuries like a shower or AC - so you perpetually look dirty even if you take a bath daily. And kids were mercilessly cruel about things like that.
For school, if it wasn't free, it wasn't happening. Extra curriculars? $10 to join a sport team wasn't happening. Gym clothes? No. Running shoes? No. Want to play ball? Go look around the park and ses if you can find a lost ball. Want to take an AP class or SAT? Better go beg for someone else to pay for it. Want to do science fair? Posterboard and markers are too expensive.
You're 12? Old enough to work under the table. You're 14? You can now get government program jobs with a waiver. You're 16? Now you can step up to legit minimum wage jobs. Just get a passing grade and fuck homework so you have time to do paying work. Graduate as fast as you can to get out of here.
You want to go to college? Ha. Who's going to pay for that application? Who's paying for the bus ride just so you can look at a campus? Who's going to accept you with that shit GPA? I'm lucky I got a waiver on SAT fees and a good score so I still had a chance.
You're 17? Now you can join the Army and get away. A legit paycheck, with legit food and a legit shower and legit work clothes without holes. I put on 20 pounds in basic training because food. Nothing to be scared of from a foreign army compared to the shootings Saturday night in the hood. Dentist had a lot of work to do to catch up. And that poverty-line salary made me the richest I've ever been. Even got a computer.
Turning 18 I had no monetary debt, but years of catching up on basic expenses just to catch up to middle class high schoolers. In another 5 years, I'd even be rich enough to get a 15 year old car. Living off student loans and ramen was heaven, even though the other kids bitched about living off $1000/mo, I was living off $500/mo on food and a room and that was finally the best years of my life. I lost a few years going to wars, but by 25 I caught up to where those middle class kids were at 18.
But of course I hadn't really caught up. After 18 some kids got a cheap room at their parents place, or their parents paid for a cell phone bill, or even paid for their car or college. And after college, some parents helped kids get jobs or down payments for mortgages.
Grad school was great until the scholarships dried up. Interviewing is hard when you've never interacted with corporate white collar employees. Be yourself is terrible advice when they can't relate to your life. Many, many cringeworthy career limiting interactions. Laid off? At least you had a parent with a couch you could crash on. I had that old car that was just getting older to sleep in.
But it got better. I'm still a straight white American male who never got caught up in crime or drugs and did well on standarized tests. I had a chance. I got out of the hood, figured out how to pretend to be middle class, and kept finding work. Hopefully by retirement age I will catch up to the kids born rich who spent most of their adult lives in jail and rehab.
Sheila McEnany Markowitz 4 years ago
Congratulations on making things happen for yourself and by yourself. In our society, what you have accomplished is admirable, and I wish you all the best the world has to offer...you've earned it.
Tammy Futagawa 4 years ago
Sounds like instead of claiming the "victim" status, you made the right choices and chose to live grounded in reality instead of believing someone owes you something because they have more than you. Nope, you didn't ask to be brought into this world but you worked with what you got and have a very healthy outlook on life. My firm belief is that it will always be about the choices we make in life. Kudos!
KT 4 years ago
I feel his pain. Had to wear my older brothers clothes (I'm a girl) a lot of hand me downs, shoes that didn't fit and caused me a great deal of pain. No extra curriculars. One time I went camping with friends and all I got to take with me was a roll of crackers, when i got to the camp site i found my mom had taken the crackers back so i just starved the whole time. On top of all that my dad beat the sh*t out of me whenever he felt like it and mom ignored it all. I left "home" as soon as I could and lived in a terrifying apartment in a nightmare neighborhood, took out student loans and went to a college for a 1 year course. Lived off a cup of soup and one bun a day for a year to get by. Finally got a good job at a hospital and I'd never had so much money in my life. My husband and i didnt know what to do with all the money so just saved it and life got better from there
Amanda Cox 4 years ago
Be yourself is terrible advice when they can't relate to your life- this sums up so much of life, way beyond classes. This statement alone speaks to the truth of trauma: poverty, single parent homes, mental injury, abuse, generational cycles, etc.
Mazer 4 years ago
BTDT. Wealthy kids are not immune to serious challenges in life. I grew up dirt poor in a very affluent area. More kids born into wealth had behavioral issues than the poor kids. The stressors of being raised by ultra-successful arrogant shallow alcoholic parents did them in sooner. Poor kids had issues mostly related to stealing and that was usually out of necessity. By my high school graduation half of the super wealthy kids were in rehab and those who had managed until then were starting to slide. By my first 10 year reunion, even more had issues. So sad what money does to otherwise good people. I never went back to another reunion and never will.
James Arvidson 4 years ago
So true. Most rich kids I knew never did a damn thing with their lives. I try to hire the people who did not have those advantages. They're smart and motivated. And the jobs I hire for are a whole lot more than entry level.
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Nikki Owens 4 years ago (edited)
It has honestly never occurred to me that any of this was something to complain about. I grew up in New Zealand on the cusp between working class & middle class. I was given the best upbringing my parents could manage, but I never had anything that was frivolous or unessential. I experienced many of the things mentioned above. I had some poor friends and some wealthy friends. But I never thought of it as unfair; I considered my rich friends lucky, but never thought of myself as deprived or disadvantaged in any way. I just saw it as life. We all play the hand we're dealt.
Pille P 4 years ago
I´m 41, worked since I was 12 and my husband is angry at me for not having saved enough to buy a house together with him. I´ve lived from paycheck to paycheck, never enough to save. All the savings I´ve had have been eaten up by the inflation. My first paycheck as a 12yr old was 25 rubles. The ruble was changed to kroon for 1:10 so it was 2.5kr. At the currency exchange only 1500 rubles were allowed to change into 150kr. That´s it. Any other money you had was useless. I as underage was not allowed anything. On the day of currency exchange was my birthday. My mom bought me a wristwatch that was previously 70rbl (expensive!) and now 7kr. On the next day the price was 40kr. So we couldn´t afford to buy a second one as a gift for grandma. The kroon was changed into euro for 1:15. In 2010 I had a full lunch for 30kr - 2€. After the exchange in 2012 the same lunch was 50kr - 3.33€ and now at least 15€. I was 29 when I could afford to rent, had to borrow from a friend for 2 months security.
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#2
Also different priorities.
In Germany there is a stereotype that young guys from migrants from the south east (Turkey / Afghanistan / etc.) always have big expensive cars. Brand new Mercedes in their twenties. Conservative Germany see that and can only wonder how someone can have something at that young age. It must be stolen, from money laundering in those weird shisha bars. Must be something illegal.
The thing is, Germans prefer other things in life. They don’t show pride in owning something expensive, they don’t want to make someone else jealous. Your neighbors won’t congratulate on your brand new Porsche. They will envy you and probably think you didn’t deserve it. Thing is, those migrants don’t think that way. They are not jealous if you show up with a Mercedes.
So when young men spend the money on a risky loan for an expensive car, it doesn’t make sense to conservative Germans, therefore those young boys didn’t do it and therefore it must be stolen or somehow illegal. In addition I recently learned that to own such a car people will also share it with close friends and instead of having 3 shitty cars they share one luxury car instead. Not many people see your house/flat but wherever you go, people see your car, or cloths or jewelry therefore those things are more important to other cultures than to yourself.
Different priorities, different choices. For you it’s a fake facade, for their circle it is a sign of pride in their belongings. Don‘t project your expectations on others.
Rez Fidel 4 years ago (edited)
You are right. But the dislike from others doesn´t alway come from prejudices against migrants. It´s the "f**k you i can do what i want now in this car" attidude which enrages people. Like speeding, shitty parking and aggresive driving. This sadly also comes with a lot of these guys (migrants and bio-germans). It is a toxic status macho thing.
Pille P 4 years ago
In Estonia there´s a saying - rich enough to buy a fancy car, poor enough not to have money for petrol. This happens when people want to flaunt while not really being able to afford.
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
this is also true within the US. Some people prefer to save money and have a "meh" car; others will get the flashy car and have no savings. Depends on a person, their subculture, all kinds of factors.
Natalie Klyk 4 years ago (edited)
BULLSH*** As if Germans don’t like to flaunt their high end cars - or badly modified low end cars (in rural areas) What guns are to Americans - cars and speeding is for morst Germans We are a speeding = freedom obsessed nation There are fishy car deals everywhere but migrants and POC get targeted & controlled more by the police… nobody checks the guy in a suit … so he gets away more easily
Pantea 4 years ago (edited)
There is a saying in Persian: "blushing by slaps in the face", meaning if you're pale because if you have nothing to eat, slap yourself to get red cheeks so others don't find out. Saving face is important for people from Middle East. I know many young "bio" Germans who even don't have a driving licence. Many live in a small room in a shared apartment, because they rather spend their money on travel. It's rare that somebody from Iran, Turkey or Lebanon etc. wants to live like that. They prefer nice cars and nice homes to invite people in. Other priorities. Also, in a society that does not welcome us "brown people" very well, it's natural to believe status symbols would boost the self-confidence.
Gustav Aschenbach 4 years ago
Germans not being into big cars? Lmao. Big limos and SUVs all around here. Mein Maserati fährt 210... Stop dissing migrants, racist.
Nubis Knight 4 years ago
I work with kids from migrant families. One told me he lives with his aunt and uncle in a small, cheap appartement, sleeping in a room with his Cousin. They weren't rich but he always wore brands like Lacoste etc. cause all the money they had they invested in good clothing. Different priorities.
Martha Meyer 4 years ago
Hada Turkish guy in my apartment building who was behind on rent, but driving a huge Mercedes. Great values. And this dude was in his 40ies with a way too young wife and two small kids.
Karl Baxter 4 years ago
I drive a knackered 15 year old hatchback and it gets me from A to B. My friends are not the sort to be impressed or judge me based on the car I drive. If they were, I’d find new friends.
#3
Rich parents.
Vasana Phong 4 years ago
When you know you will always have someone or something to fall back on when you missed your rent or bills, you will always get bailed out vs. knowing if you’re late on any of these things you and your family will be in the streets, makes you strive more
Karen Weiland 4 years ago
Many years ago I worked at a law firm. We got a case where the plaintiff was a 32 year old stewardess for a jet service (I don’t remember the name but it definitely wasn’t a big carrier like Delta etc). She was claiming back injuries from a car accident and could not work. Her salary was $132,000 per year per her paystubs and W2 form. We could not figure out how someone that young would get paid that much by a small time airline. My attorney figured that her job included some element of prostitution. Any stewardesses who would like to explain that to me I would welcome a reply.
James Arvidson 4 years ago
Yep. Rich parents, illegal business, etc... Their lives usually are not that great. You just see that moment in time.
Susan Alderson 4 years ago
Not with that acne. Rich parents take their kids to the dermatologist.
#4
Lots of people have family money, but very few are honest about it.
denzoren 4 years ago
If you asked them they all built it from the ground up...not to mention those "small loans".
BetweenTheCracks 4 years ago
And they will fight you on how "broke" they are, even though they have no clue what poverty is really like.
SZ 4 years ago
Yep, And try to mooch off of you because they're "poor". Had a friend who made about $5k less then me annually, and would try to always pressure me into letting her pay less when we split the check, or get away with not paying for things like coffee or a drink or try and bum cigarettes off me. Found out later that her dad was a millionare and she was buying a house outright from her trust fund. Her salary was purely for fun, but SHE WAS POOR.
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Madadh Sweeney 4 years ago
Most people assume that support is universal, so they think of themselves as having "done it by ," when in fact, they had generations of foundation laid for them.
#5
Not paying rent is the primary. You know how much money I would save just by not paying rent. I could pay my mortgage that's how much money.
Tbh I am working just to pay rent :(
denzoren 4 years ago
Rent is horrible. It's okay for me to pay $2000 in rent per month but the bank wouldn't give me a mortgage at $1000 per month.
Nicki 4 years ago
It is so bad here in California...The hubs and I were lucky and bought after the real estate bubble burst (2009) and got a newly built house in a bedroom community in SoCal (about an hour north of San Diego). Now our mortgage is about the same as a 2 bedroom apartment in the same town! We are not going anywhere so if the bubble pops again, we will be fine, but still! Sometimes it can be about luck and timing...
Ozzie Ogawa 4 years ago
I'm so lucky for getting a place to stay (with electricity and water, all for free), with decent wage. The downside is i have to work 7 days a week most of the time. NB : i work in aquaculture industry, a fish hatchery to be exact
Ladyandthetramp 4 years ago
Like rich people blow off Thousands of euros just on a bottle of wine. When that could be very helpful and change my life.
Rebecca Shockley 4 years ago
If you are carrying to much debt you can't get a loan unless you get a government loan and they are there to get. Sometimes it's best to start there to get your credit started.
Madadh Sweeney 4 years ago
Getting a mortgage is absurd. An apartment complex has no trouble fitting you into a unit that soaks up 3/4's of your income. However, a bank won't lend you jack or s**t to buy a house even if the mortgage payment would be half of what you're currently paying in rent. Oh yeah, and got student loans? Be prepared to be flogged for that as well.
First Name Last Name 4 years ago
What I don't get is how many younger people won't even consider living with others to split rental costs. Six people in a $1000 per month house is cheap as heck!
#6
Don’t compare your life to someone’s highlight reel on social media.
You see what they want you to see, but you never get to see their problems.
I highly doubt that individuals in their young 20s have the means to live that kind of lifestyle without some kind of support such as their parents. There are exceptions im sure, but the point being is that you should always take what you see with a grain of salt.
Idan York 4 years ago
Different priorities. They probably don't have an investment portfolio or long-term strategy. Most are spending all their money on high-depreciation items (cars, clothes, night-life) and accruing a lot of debt, thus setting a pattern of living beyond their means. Look after your own money and don't follow their bad example.
Mazer 4 years ago
Some kids have the money, and that does not give an automatic free swipe from problems. It’s a lifestyle based on shallowness when people’s egos are tied to material wealth. Especially when pressures are to keep buying to maintain some sort of status. It can screw people up big time
v 4 years ago
I worked a contract job in the United Arab Emirates from 2011-2017. I remember, from the first year I was there, news stories talking about young Emirate people complaining about being under such heavy debt. The reason they were under this debt is because "the world" expected them to be ballers and high rollers so they financed that lifestyle through debt. How many on the average social media platforms around the world do the same for the same reason?
James Arvidson 4 years ago (edited)
Yes to a point but I watched Saudi and other soldiers on pay day empty an ATM with multiple transactions when coming to the states to get trained by the US. Not loan day. Regular old Pay Day. Hard to feel bad for them either way. And they had collateral or something to borrow against.
Load More Replies... Ladyandthetramp 4 years ago
It’s so true! Nobody’s going to record and post the bad parts of there life. All you see is what they want you to see. If they want you to see there brand new trainers you bought there going to show that, not the fight they had with there mum.
#7
Don't even get me started. I was the only one in my ex-friend circle doing literally everything I could to financially educate myself fresh out of high-school.
Those same people are in crippling debt today because they were so busy with building this ridiculous image of themselves as being rich JUST for social media.
One of those guys fucked up real good. He took out a loan for a BMW M3 at 16% interest over 7 years with $3000 down. How he was even approved for that loan is beyond my understanding.
People will do anything for clout, man.
BetweenTheCracks 4 years ago
"People will do anything for clout." Truest damn thing I'll read today.
May 4 years ago
My father bought an BMW M6 (or M8? I'm not sure - it's red) when he retired and now he posts pictures of it and the places he drives in it, pretty much every day. He's always had sensible, normal cars - and that's why he can afford an expensive one now.
Auntriarch 4 years ago
That's lovely to hear, he's enjoying it, he's earned it
Load More Replies... Mazer 4 years ago
Unless you are taught otherwise. In my community same thing. Girls buy fancy cars so they can lure in wealthy guys and then be settled for life. When the guys find out the car is it, and they don’t come from money they are gone. It works both ways, guys wanting to marry for money not realizing they are in for a tough ride with Uber-wealthy in-laws who they will never impress
Rebecca Shockley 4 years ago
People with money don't want someone that doesn't have any. Money usually marries money to combine the wealth. Nobody wants needy only independent.
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Not Proud British 4 years ago
I was about to say.... some of the time it's not their money, it's loaned and they just forget they have to pay it back, with interest.
Sharon Ingram 4 years ago
I recently found out there is a term for these people. They’re called HENRYs. High expenses not rich yet. But they never get there. Every increase in income isn’t given to debt but to more, bigger, better things.
#8
I'm grew up in a pretty rural area and most wealthy young people I know are in Factory/manufacturing and work 60-70 hours a week and have virtually NO free time. They'll have a 50k truck and 200k house in their mid 20's but are stuck in a brutal 12-14hr workday lifestyle.
I know very few wealthy kids that have lots of free time, maybe in that case they would probably have come from wealthy families? Trust fund kids maybe?
Personally Ill take free time over money any day (well to a certain extent I guess) I'm not lazy, I just believe that your TIME is the most valuable currency that you own, not the money in the bank.
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
I've been in *poverty*. Food, clothign, shelter, money to buy a book? *WEALTH*
v 4 years ago
Thing is, and this is illustrated very well in this post, wealth of an individual isn't measured by the amount of debt carried. That $250K of debt between the truck and house more than likely amounted to, maybe, ten percent ($25K) of actual net worth. Debt is King, especially in the U.S.A., and the debt mongers sell their wares on nothing more than the perception of wealth. At the risk of sounding like a shill, check out Dave Ramsey and his Financial Peace University. I guarantee you won't have to buy anything, unless you want to. Listen to his pod casts and/or YouTube videos. His method of conquering and controlling personal debt does works, regardless of whether you follow his personal religious beliefs or not (I don't, at all). His main message is that you have more control over your personal finances and life than the debt mongers would like you to believe.
Victoria 4 years ago
But they work so much they don't really have the time to enjoy it.....
Load More Replies... Mazer 4 years ago
Your health is the most important thing you have. You are not guaranteed a tomorrow, nobody is, no matter how wealthy you are. A friends friend, wonder guy, had major bucks. Went on for plastic surgery. Turns out he had this super rare undiagnosed blood issue which eventually caused his death long long after his surgery. If he didn’t have the choice to have the surgery because of being poor he would still be alive with a complex about his looks
#9
My aunt and uncle are loaded. Some years ago, my younger cousin would tell me he bought his expensive car (for a 17 year old) all by himself.
My uncle told me that he had bought both cars for his kids with his own money. Wanted them to save their money.
Totally fine with this. But lying just makes him look desperate for attention.
Mazer 4 years ago
It goes both ways, many rich kids feel the need to hold themselves to an unrealistic standard but so do poor kids
May 4 years ago
It seems both being poor and being very rich messes you up. I feel extremely privileged to have grown up being neither.
Load More Replies... #10
Also the rent economy - people can rent almost anything these days! Fancy clothes and handbags, cars, property... hell, even friends. So often we only see the surface of people, not the reality.
This is super common in the "influencer" world.
Ladyandthetramp 4 years ago
It’s so crazy now! People are so worried about how they appear to others
#11
I only recently learnt a mate has a dozens trust funds & stock handed down generationally. They spend most of their time in a constant state of decorating. I always wondered how they afforded to do it considering they don’t do much or anything else.
#12
I've been poor and felt just like you. I'm 31 now and my expenses are literally 600 a month. The rest of my money is spent buying gifts, traveling, and basically doing whatever I want. My friends get annoyed that I "do whatever all the time" but the truth is im almost living day to day like a 14 year old. I eat fast food, leftovers, live with 5 roommates. My actual life is really gross. But I put up with that because I get to have way more freedom and adventures pretty often. I'm not married, have no kids, hell I haven't owned a car in 5 years, but if you look at my social media it looks like all I do is travel, skydive, party, eat well, kayake, etc. I'm not posting me sitting at home. Also, I'm not in debt at all but lots of people are.
denzoren 4 years ago
This is pretty cool. Not an option for all I must say though. I live at home but I also help support my parents, I'm paying for graduate school and where I live I don't have a choice when it comes to owning a car (public transport is horrible). My expenses aren't extremely high but I still can't really afford so much extra stuff.
Mazer 4 years ago
Some people make enough to go play, in this day and age THATS a privilege many don’t have. Where I live, there is no public transportation. You have a job that obviously pays you well enough to travel. Do you have full time work with full benefits? If so, that’s a privilege. If the industry you work in now disappears or you get fired do you have six months of savings? If not you should. Some people I know have three or four jobs, none with benefits and dud to being raised poor they have health issues which is where every cent they make goes to pay for - medical costs. Your health and current wealth are an illusion. If you have an accident and seriously injure yourself, your world will change in a heartbeat and not for the better. Poor kids grow up knowing this.
lailyfnoor 4 years ago
Same! In social media, people see me travel a lot, thinking that I have fun life. But it's like 20% of my actual life. The rest of it is working in boring corporate job and living in small rented ghetto apartment. And with its small paying, I have to live thrifty and own less to afford my occational fun.
Trisha Chase 4 years ago
I’m sort of the same way, if you look at my Instagram you would think I was rich. But in reality, I spend the majority of my time at home in sweatpants reading books, or surfing YouTube. I save all my money so I can travel, I’m basically “living it up” at a discount price, but only 4 to 5 months out of the year. The rest of the year I’m a lazy bum lol, a bookworm chilling on my couch. I think people forget what “behind the scenes” of people’s lives really look like because of social media.
#13
Also - If you're a natural "life of the party" type of person. If you have a likable and interesting personality. People are drawn to you and opportunities can heavily turn to your favor.
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago
Yes, but if you are too much into being the life of the party but not enough into knuckling down and doing some actual work, those opportunities will dry up. Quickly.
Pantea 4 years ago (edited)
Well you know what? It's kind of true, but it's not only about being "fun". I'm sorry to say that you need to be female and beautiful. When I was young and pretty, I could go out all night for free. I was not asking anyone to pay for me, expecting others to invite me or doing "favours" - I swear - but drinks appeared in front of me and every time I wanted to pay, it was already paid! Even taxi drivers would sometimes refuse to accept money :)) Considering I was a down to earth girl without any manipulation "skills", you can probably imagine what some other young women could achieve. I knew a girl whose wealthy, already married sugar daddy paid her apartment, her (expensive German) driving licence, her car, her training as a goldsmith and her first shop and at the same time had a young handsome boyfriend for pleasure. At the end she left both, married a baron, became a baroness and lives in a palace now. No kidding.
#14
A lot of people like that are actually in debt. They go into debt to sell the "perfect IG lifestyle." I have plenty of classmates from high school who moved to LA right after graduation (no rich parents btw) and continuously post photos of them showing off cars, going on luxury shopping trips, etc. and most of them are in so much debt it's crazy. One of my classmates left LA last year during the pandemic because she couldn't afford to keep up with her fake lifestyle anymore. Now she has a job working at Target to pay off some of the debt she's accumulated and moved back in with her parents.
#15
I'm young (23) and make way more than I need but if I ever posted a video on a boat or drove a nice car or went to clubs 24/7, it's safe to say it is either my parents vehicles, or I was able to afford it due to the position my parents put me in. No 23 year old who didn't come from a nice upbringing could afford an Audi (I don't drive an Audi, but you get the point), even if they make six figures. Most 23 year old's have a negative net worth. The ones that flaunt anything either are 1) coming from nice backgrounds or 2) are digging themselves into debt. I can confidently say this because I come from the first scenario. I guess my point is that it is all noise. Don't get distracted by it and pulled into the lifestyle of impressing others. If your life revolves around impressing others, you will not be happy regardless of how much money you have. The future super wealthy people who are currently your age are probably moving silently, without broadcasting their endeavors for the world to see. With that being said, it is nice to try and achieve the highest earning potential you can. An example of that would be me leaving engineering and going into an MBA program that later became a project management gig. Make double as I did as an engineer. Just don't get sucked into the noise. Even someone who makes 300K but can't budget will always be broke. Infinite spending is an illness. Also the miami/fort lauderdale area is its own beast. You have to take everything with a grain of salt there. I'm sure there are people living in mansions down there who are struggling to make ends meet. I know a few.
#16
Beware of debt. I make what most would consider a comfortably large amount of money. I drive older cars, have a modest house, and an constantly fixing my broken things. My neighbors have brand new cars from nice manufacturers, sometimes boats, a second house maybe, and all this and that. Why? Because they over leverage liability debt. Besides my home, I have none. It's my choice, cause I don't give a fuck about what any one thinks.
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago
It used to be called “keeping up with the Joneses”, it was ridiculous to do back in the day, and it’s ridiculous to do now.
#17
I come from a pretty well-off family, and I have made it very, VERY clear that my parents are not to help me unless I ask. I have my own bank account, I'm setting up a life map.
And I probably won't be as rich as these people, because-ngl-some of them are REALLY spoiled.
So. My answer? Rich family. Boom. But hard work is always the answer.
Final score:
28points
Sam Chilton 4 years ago
Hard work and luck. I've always worked hard, but hardly anyone wants things done thoroughly, just quickly. Lots of exhausting overtime (especially in the culinary section) usually unpaid, and then get laid off. Being an immigrant (UK->EU) sucks.
Suzanne Haigh 4 years ago
Being in Europe means you have a fallback clause, you will not starve or be homeless if you are out of work. Impossible to compare Europe to the USA
Load More Replies... Mazer 4 years ago
The difference - you have a choice. Something happens to the job industry you are on, or you get injured. You won’t HAVE to work. It’s an invisible privilege which you have snd others don’t. I bet you got into a good school from the start. THAT IS PRIVILEGE.
Pumpkin Spice (Submission author) 4 years ago
No, actually. We bounced around from school to school until we found a good one. My parents worked hard and I intend to do the same.
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A C 4 years ago
Even without direct financial support of well to do parents-- you have a safety net to fall back on that allows you to mentally relax and take risks that those with the cold hard pavent to fall back on that can prove very advantageous. Also, basic exposure to wealth/ wealthy circles of people/opportunities is another sometimes unnoticeable but very real advantage of "very well to do partents"
Pumpkin Spice (Submission author) 4 years ago
You know what? You're right! I never noticed this before.
Load More Replies... #18
That almost always is the result of rich parents. Either their parents just directly give them money, their parents hooked them up with a job they didn't deserve that pays way better than it should, or their parents cover major bills (car payments, rent, etc) so all of their money can just be spent on "fun time" stuff .
#19
Couple of options:
Wealthy parents
Still living at home - even a poor paying job can let you live well if your main expenses don't exist
social media effect - you only see the BEST days you don't see the other 6 days in the week.
EDITS to add from other comments:
Debt - especially a way to have the "nice car" they really should not be buying
Luck - there are people out there who get super lucky and fall into the right job that gets them wealthy, or get lucky on Crypto or stocks
Life of the party - Some people get invited to cool events because they are good fun
EDIT 2 Because this blew up more while i was sleeping:
Drug Dealing/Crime - a way to get a lot of money fast
Vacation - this is more for the people around your friends but people will be there for a good time and spending their money.
Hard work - At age 21 this usually going to have be in concert with a bit of luck or parental help, but hard work will take those advantages further.
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
Never having to apply for jobs or go on interviews, because they’re going to work for the family business, where they do not start at entry level but go straight into management at double the normal starting salary. Then they eventually have it all just handed to them—-regardless of whether they actually have a clue how to run it—-and not all parents make sure their kids have the education and experience necessary to run the family business before that happens. That’s why you see so many well run successful family businesses with happy, loyal, longtime employees while the parents are running them, drastically change after being handed over to the kids. They either 1) become hellholes to work at that have sky high turnover rates, or 2) go right down the toilet through unbelievably bad management by incompetent children who then hire their equally incompetent buddies as management, or 3) end up with the parents having to come out of retirement and fire the kids, just to keep the whole shebang from going under.
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
The number of people who look legit on the outside, who are doing serious crime to fund that "good life" before 30? Scares he** outta me. Arms dealing. Porn. "Oh, it doesn't hurt anyone..." Yeah, it does. but they get their "good life"... Hmph
#20
Possible reasons: family money, credit card debt, illegal activities, "morally ambiguous" activities, rich friends and/or suckers. There are plenty more, and everyone's circumstances are different. Some have planned and budgeted for whatever it is they do. Money isn't everything. Keeping good people around you is. Live within your means, or ideally below it. r/personalfinance is a great repository of information and guidance if you ask for it to get you on track. Flashy clothes and cars aren't everything you think they are; mileage varies with the people who possesses them. The great thing about being 21 is you get to experience that all for yourself and find out. The fact your asking these questions, and hopefully sincerely seeking answers is a great start. Follow up.
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
I’ve known 25 year olds who graduated high school at 18, immediately got themselves apprenticed to master plumbers/electricians/HVAC specialists, and worked their way up to become masters in their fields themselves by the time they were 25-28 years old. There’s good money in those fields if you’re good at them, and good at running a business as well (evening business classes at the local community college can help). But those young folks were also very mature, responsible, and committed to learning their trades at a young age. Rare gems, it seems.
James Arvidson 4 years ago
This is what I am telling my son. College now is a scam with the amount of debt it requires. Everyone needs the lights on and the crap flushed out of their house and they'll scrape up the money to keep it working even in bad economies. White collar work and IT fluctuates. Be ready for layoffs etc... But you still have to pay those student loans for the over priced education.
Load More Replies... #22
Adding to this: If your wealthy parents pay your rent and give you a monthly allowance. Mine pay my rent currently and while I’m too much of a homebody to really ever want to show it off, I am putting 90% of the money I’m earning at my job into savings for when I get an apartment I’m paying for after I graduate. I’ve gotten $1600 in my savings for two weeks just because I don’t have to pay for anything, including school debt. My parents are great and it pisses me off to see other kids in that situation taking it for granted
Nikki Owens 4 years ago
This. I'm advising both my kids to live at home until they've saved enough money to make a down payment on their own place. Renting is a scam & you end up with nothing.
I I 4 years ago
my daughter is doing just that , seems house prices rise just as fast as her savings
Load More Replies... Mazer 4 years ago
Privilege right here. You have choices that poorer people don’t and you’re pissed off that others are taking their situation for granted. Wow!
Katie Schopen 4 years ago
Why is it bad for her to be upset that other rich kids take their situation for granted?
Load More Replies... #23
I wonder if it's a different family dynamic, my friends from SEA, India, etc seem to keep money in the family so to speak, and pool money/accommodation/cars. Until people get married they live in the family house and sometimes even carry on living at home once married or at least in another family-owned home. This pool of cash/wealth means it's easier to have a nice car. My friend at university (20 years ago) was driving a brand new civic fancy edition something or other. The rest of us couldn't afford cars, but he mentioned it's technically a family car (one of many) that he uses.
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
Used to be that way in the US too, especially amongst immigrant families. My father’s parents had him and my aunt (their only two children) living at home even after they both got married. Once they saved enough for a house and furniture, plus enough money in the bank and savings to cover emergencies, they moved out. It was their parents’ way of giving them a house without actually buying it for them, and helping them get a good headstart in life, instead of having to dig themselves out of a deep hole by going into debt. I wish more parents did this—-as long as the kids understand it’s a chance to work and save without being buried under expenses, not a license to lay around the house all day and freeload.
Mazer 4 years ago
Just because immigrants from a different part of the world doesn’t mean that they’re not privileged. Having a family is a privilege, having a family that can live together is a privilege, having family members who are all working is a privilege. A privilege is defined as a special right or advantage. This list is all about privilege that many born into extreme poverty just don’t have
#24
I know a lot of girls that are wealthy because they do "lewd" content in various sites. Others do pr0n. Both are lucrative endeavors if you have the discipline to be entrepreneurial. These friends grew up poor, decided to capitalize on their looks while they are still young and can and have been doing extremely well for themselves. Some are smart with their money others not so much
Final score:
15points
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
Yes, but what are they going to do when that runs out? The internet isn’t written in pencil, so it will follow them forever, including if they decide to get a college degree and go into another line of work. You can’t just think in the short term, unless you know for a fact you’ll be dead by 30. Since most of us are going to live til three times that age, or even close to four, long term thinking is what we should all be doing way more of.
Eve-Marie Hughes 4 years ago
When I worked as a desk clerk at a residence hotel, one of the sex workers was paying her way through law school without any student loans. Another was doing pre-med, also with no student loans. Most sex workers I've known over the years knew that it was a short-term career and used it to build a financial buffer for their long-term career. Some had a rough transition - others had planned for a variety of contingencies and made a good life for themselves. Sex work does not carry the stigma it once did - and it shouldn't.
Load More Replies... Michael Se 4 years ago
Not just gals. Gay-for-pay guys make A LOT of money on OnlyFans and other sites. A LOT.
#25
Also another option. Some people just get extremely lucky. My cousin went to work in a local factory in high school. He was making 80K by the age of 21. Likewise a guy I knew from high school, got a degree that landed him a tech job betting $125,000 after graduating from college. Not saying these situations are common, but they do happen.
lailyfnoor 4 years ago
My parents had ever said to me: doesn't matter how smart or how hard working we are, they are nothing without luck.
#26
Rich Parents and Credit Cards
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago
Correction: rich parents, who are also paying their kids’ credit card bills.
#27
I swear I ask myself this all the time. I see other teenagers on TikTok, and when I say teenagers I really mean it like not even 20. They have trendy clothes, a never ending wardrobe, a bunch of books, music albums or whatever they like to collect, have expensive phones etc And I'm just looking at that like how!??
#28
Outside appearances are honestly more of a sign they don’t have as much money as you think, but also could he explained in some ways. A nice car and nice clothes are not good indicators that they have money. Almost anyone can get a car on loan but what you don’t see if their 16% interest car payments on their 6 years loans, equating to likely double the advertised cost of vehicle, which is depreciated by half once it’s finally paid off. Nice clothes depending on the brand can still be found for cheap or even at thrift stores. I’ve found lots of great clothes this way. Also they could be buying these but the rest of their life is crap. My neighbor for example (not hating) doesn’t have to pay for his house because his parents paid for it. So he spends his money on a brand new, big feature truck. Okay fine. But doesn’t have much else - no investments, savings, or any preparation for the future. Some people just spend money on outside materials - sometimes even to impress others - but have nothing else. Of course come people have rich parents are might be doing okay for a season. But you can look rich without being rich. Also in my experience the higher middle class to slightly wealthy people show rarely any signs that they are. Im not rich my any means but I drive a 16 year old car that is literally worth only a couple grand and has rust. I don’t upgrade because I don’t need to and rather have the money in investments. That being said, the best way to start having free time and make good money is to start looking at options like starting a business, investing opportunities, etc.
#29
For me, I have a good job that I do 14 13 hours days straight with 14 days off to rest.
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago
Medical job, like nurse or doctor (intern)? Offshore oil rig? Commercial deep sea fishing?
Aski Markup 4 years ago
Damn, how would you make time for spouse and/or kids on those sort of work days?
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
If they’re young, they don’t necessarily have that yet. When they eventually do, they may change careers. Or marry someone who is reeeeeeally understanding of their hours (and they better f*****g well treat them like the rare and precious gems they are because of it too).
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#30
Also - DEBT. In particular for Cars.
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
Beautiful expensive luxury car. Parked in the driveway of a f*****g tumbledown shack.
BetweenTheCracks 4 years ago
I have zero debt, INCLUDING student loans. But I drive a 16 y/o car, rent my home, etc. But society cares more about how you look than how responsible you are, so fvck me I guess.
James Arvidson 4 years ago
That is now. You have no debt. It is an opportunity. Nothing more. But you can make your future better than many of these people with debt have. I'm in my 50's and have a 17 years old truck. But saved and avoided debt. Own my home. Enough room for my family and even my kids after their married if they want to save for a time. All starting from growing up homeless and first job at 12. I bought a couple of fancy cars when younger and regretted it every time. You'll get there. It takes time. Build a solid foundation. Even 20 years ago if you told me where I'd be I would not believe you. It accelerates as you get older if you build a solid foundation.
Load More Replies...The fascination with financial dynamics within a family can often lead to intense discussions. While young people today are frequently questioned about their financial independence and display of wealth, the core issues might not be too distant from those faced by other families in different contexts.
A relevant discussion about how financial circumstances can affect familial roles and responsibilities was captured in an insightful story, which dives into the nuances of financial agreements and obligations in a marital setting.
#31
I didn't get this either, until I got close with someone whose family had a long legacy of wealth, literally dating back hundreds of years. Once you get to a certain level of wealth, you live off interest. The money literally makes its own money for you. Serious wealth is just a whole other ball game. Made me pretty mad when I first found out about this.
#32
These are definitely likely options. A lot of people are also just living beyond their means. Not saving at all, always in some debt, not investing. A friend of mine worked in a trendy neighborhood in NYC, always serving these types of people, wearing designer clothes and she said in all her jobs she never had more people's cards get declined. Ive also been in more than one situation where someone was having a bad time in front of me, but from the posts about the day you would think they were having the time of their life. Another option, is service work. They tend to work odd hours, and in many cases much fewer hours. I used to make $50k working three days a week at a bar. It was 6-9 hour shifts of non-stop running around, no time for a break. You also meet lots of people and can often leverage perks, people taking you on yachts, buying you bottles, fancy rich bar owners paying for "learning/bonding" trips to food meccas, free or discounted drinks/food. Ive had $500 meals comped completely as industry. A good looking friend meets really rich older guys at her club job and they casually date and will invite her on expensive vacations, buy all the food, drinks, and drugs for partying, when she gets bored she moves on to another guy. She also gets tipped extremely well. Makes six figures. Eventually you have a network of "friends" who have more money to throw around and like to so they can have "friends" since they shallow. But it's all dependent on age, personality, looks, and stamina. It is hard work and can wreak havoc on your body and mind. And the environment can encourage or exacerbate substance abuse and/mental health issues. Its also rampant with sexual harassment and abuse from customers and coworkers. Ill never go back to a job like that but it was definitely fun sometimes when I was younger and I'm kinda jealous of all my old coworkers making amazing summer bartending money. But my body is forever wrecked and I wouldn't be able to put up with the toxic employer relations after this crazy year of covid and self-care. I have also felt comfortable living paycheck to paycheck because I am broke not poor. I have so many safety nets, a good college education, reasonably well off parents, very well off in-laws, and no major debt. Sadly im better off than a lot of people. Not true of lots of people who would be incredibly stressed to have negative money sometimes in the name of fun. And now that I am starting to take money more seriously and dont want to party as much ill still pass many people who have tried a lot harder because i was born with privilege and the 9.9 percent usually stays in the 9.9%. This is a great article about the class of people everyone forgets when talking about the 1%. It's not equitable or fair but it's true.
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago (edited)
Years ago, I had a friend who worked in the finance department of a BMW dealership. She said she learned really quickly not to be taken in by appearances. The flashy person pulling up in a high end car and wearing designer clothes wasn’t necessarily the person with money. In fact, they most likely were already stretched so thin that one emergency expense would topple their whole house of cards. She said she started to put way more faith in the old farmer/rancher/plumber/working man driving up in a battered old pickup truck and wearing work clothes, and coming in to buy his granddaughter a nice car for her graduation from medical school. She said you’d be amazed how often that was the kind of person who could pull more than enough crumpled up cash out of his pockets to buy any car his granddaughter wanted.
#33
Full agree on the living at home. I went from a hefty savings and basically spending money whenever I wanted Willy nilly. Now that I live in a house I own, I actually have worries about having money to pay the bills. A raise coming at work makes me feel a bit better but I definitely have credit card debt I’m just waiting to pay til the money comes in, which is new for me.
#34
Wealthy parents. I have had such a big net below me to fall in. I failed a study once and now I'm still able to attempt another and then study more after that. Insanely grateful
#35
Debt. Getting a loan for a $45+ car is super easy actually. You’d probably be surprised how many of those people have less than $1000 to their name.
#36
To start, I came from poverty. I joined the US Navy at 17 years old in 2012 with a 14k enlistment bonus (it's up to 40k now). At 19 years old I reenlisted for 100k bonus. I used some of the money to purchase my first home and from there invested heavily in real estate (rentals). The rest is history, made a big amount of money with minimal effort and eventually started buying stocks. My best buys were Tesla, Microsoft, and dogecoin. I'm 26 now and I just bought my 4th house. In short, i joined the military and was responsible with my money and now I have more money than I can reasonably spend and I am very content in life.
#37
Getting a job in tech can be lucrative
Michael Se 4 years ago
Yes. Being from Seattle, tech office workers are paid absolutely obscene amounts of money, while the people in the warehouses and delivery (read: those who make it all possible) can't afford to live in the city and are further exploited by other gig-economy tech giants to meet their financial needs.
#38
I can definetly relate that what you’re saying. I think one thing to keep in mind is you don’t see the behind the scenes. These people might drive nice cars and eat out all the time, but they probably don’t have any savings as they most likely blow all their money immediately. Also keep in mind that many people probably do many activities in one day, but spread out the pictures they took over a week online. So it looks like everyday their doing something else but they might all just be pictures from one night.
#39
A younger bloke (28, I'm 41) who works with me (lets call him Dave) always comes in with designer clothing and drives a quite new BMW. It always confused me how he afforded all this stuff as he earns less than me and I certainly couldn't buy all the stuff he does. Then on a work night out (which he also attended) I happened to notice he had been nursing the same pint of beer for well over an hour. I asked another colleague (who knows him better than me) why Dave wasn't drinking. He laughed and said "because he can't afford it". The colleague went on to explain he lives at home and his parents don't charge him any upkeep. Also he was financed up to his eyeballs for the car he drives and was in huge credit card and loan debt and had zero savings and had no plans for any financially secure future. Basically something like 95% of his salary went towards the trinkets he buys simply to project an "image". So a lot of these people who, on social media and in real life, seem to be living an extravagant lifestyle are only able to do so by completely disregarding their future financial security just to project said image.
Final score:
3points
#40
Sales. Great salespeople make great money
Kathryn Baylis 4 years ago
Until it dries up, and the commission checks shrink. Sales is a feast or famine gamble.
BetweenTheCracks 4 years ago
Yah. All you need is a silver tongue and a complete lack of ethics.
Unwelcomed Guest 4 years ago
That is a fallacy. These types never amount to much in sales and usually bounce their way from one job to another. The best and most successful sales people are good listeners and use empathy
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What do you think ?
Random Anon 4 years ago
One thing about escaping the hood is to leave the resentment in the hood. Otherwise you've not really escaped. Don't bother measuring yourself with these folks and just accept the world isn't fair. Easier said than done, I know I've been there. Build your own world with what you have. That in itself is a luxury a lot of people do not get.
Vivian Ashe 4 years ago
I don't know about other countries, but in the U.S., credit card companies start bombarding kids with credit card offers as soon as they turn 18. They all charge ridiculously high interest rates, but the minimum monthly payment is low enough that people can just keep racking up more and more debt every month. And as long as they keep making their monthly payments, they'll keep getting offers in the mail for more credit cards. People end up with tens of thousands of dollars in credit card debt that they'll probably never be able to pay off.
Neil Bidle 4 years ago
Even worse is when these kids eventually hit retirement age with nothing in the bank and no pension either...what then?
lorrie rothstein 4 years ago
What is the point of these fancy material items? If people buy all these things they go in debt. You just dig yourself a deeper hole.
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
Hubby's parents were really well=off compared to 90% of Americans. He refused any help after college. (Note: No student debt was freaking well a huge bonus! even 30 years ago.) His siblings got everythign paid for till they were 35. THAT is how they "got ahead". Not hard work. Their dad's hard work and good luck. Living off Daddy till 35, even when married, etc. Different world from mine and Hubby's, and we're fine with that.
Rugchairclockdog 4 years ago
Umm is this thread just shaming kids?? and parents who are just trying there best?
Random Anon 4 years ago
One thing about escaping the hood is to leave the resentment in the hood. Otherwise you've not really escaped. Don't bother measuring yourself with these folks and just accept the world isn't fair. Easier said than done, I know I've been there. Build your own world with what you have. That in itself is a luxury a lot of people do not get.
Vivian Ashe 4 years ago
I don't know about other countries, but in the U.S., credit card companies start bombarding kids with credit card offers as soon as they turn 18. They all charge ridiculously high interest rates, but the minimum monthly payment is low enough that people can just keep racking up more and more debt every month. And as long as they keep making their monthly payments, they'll keep getting offers in the mail for more credit cards. People end up with tens of thousands of dollars in credit card debt that they'll probably never be able to pay off.
Neil Bidle 4 years ago
Even worse is when these kids eventually hit retirement age with nothing in the bank and no pension either...what then?
lorrie rothstein 4 years ago
What is the point of these fancy material items? If people buy all these things they go in debt. You just dig yourself a deeper hole.
Leo Domitrix 4 years ago
Hubby's parents were really well=off compared to 90% of Americans. He refused any help after college. (Note: No student debt was freaking well a huge bonus! even 30 years ago.) His siblings got everythign paid for till they were 35. THAT is how they "got ahead". Not hard work. Their dad's hard work and good luck. Living off Daddy till 35, even when married, etc. Different world from mine and Hubby's, and we're fine with that.
Rugchairclockdog 4 years ago
Umm is this thread just shaming kids?? and parents who are just trying there best?
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