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BF Won’t Let GF Ever Sleep In, She Explodes When He Once Again Wakes Her Up By Flicking Her Nose
Ever had a weekend morning where you just wanted to snuggle your pillow and go deeper into the covers? That’s just an amazing feeling, after a long working week. But what if your partner had other plans? We’ve all been there: it’s Saturday, the sun is barely up and, for some weird reason, your partner wakes you up, insisting it’s time to get moving. While it may be okay once or twice, what if this becomes a habit and goes beyond a simple inconvenience, feeling downright disrespectful?
More info: Reddit
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One woman shares her frustration with her boyfriend for not letting her sleep in on weekends, causing conflict in their relationship
Image credits: Alex Green (not the actual photo)
The girlfriend enjoys a good sleep on weekends, but her boyfriend keeps waking her up for no reason, even though she repeatedly tells him to stop
Image credits: ThrowRA_NC92
Image credits: Acharaporn Kamornboonyarush (not the actual photo)
Image credits: ThrowRA_NC92
Image credits: Helena Lopes (not the actual photo)
Image credits: ThrowRA_NC92
The boyfriend ignores his girlfriend’s need for sleep, insisting on making her get up for absolutely no reason, and says she is acting childish
One woman took to the internet to share her frustration with her early bird boyfriend. The OP, let’s call her Jane, loves her weekend sleep-ins. During the week, she’s up by 7 AM for work, so those rare mornings when she can snooze until 9:30 or even 10 are pure bliss. Enter Mike, (not his real name but let’s roll with it) her boyfriend who moved in with her a few months earlier. Mike is an early riser, up at 7 AM every day, weekends included. This difference in morning routines has sparked more than a few arguments, as Jane has started to become annoyed by her beau’s nasty wake-up call habit.
Jane’s typical weekend scenario, when she has no plans for the morning, is to sleep in as much as she can – and she really looks forward to those Saturdays and Sundays. Mike, however, waking up very early even on his days off, has acquired the weird habit of waking his girlfriend up at every chance. Why, you may ask? Well, Mike claims they need to prepare for something happening hours later. Jane has tried plenty of times to set some boundaries by clearly stating her intentions to sleep in. She has told her boyfriend that she wants (and needs) to sleep in on weekends, but every time her requests have been ignored by Mike.
Jane’s breaking point was on Mother’s Day (Sunday), when Mike’s early wake-up call was the last straw. Jane spent all of Saturday cleaning and prepping for a family lunch the next day. She went to bed excited about a well-deserved sleep-in. But Sunday morning, Mike flicked her nose at 9 AM, one hour before her alarm, saying they needed to get ready. Jane completely lost it at that moment and started to cry, justifiably asking herself “Why can’t he just let me sleep until an alarm I set goes off?”. Mike brushed off her feelings, calling her reaction childish and insisting he was just being helpful.
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
Experts at The Gottman Institute say this isn’t just about sleep—it’s about respect and personal boundaries. “If our partners are unwilling to meet our needs, the relationship cannot thrive. Working together to meet each other’s needs is a dance that can create a meaningful and lasting relationship.”
Clear, empathetic communication and flexibility are key to lasting relationships and the partners should find a compromise that respects both their needs and wishes. For Jane and Mike, this could mean setting a no-wake-up-before-X-time rule or finding solo morning activities for Mike – like going for a run, reading, or other quiet activities, until Jane wakes up.
At the heart of Jane and Mike’s conflict is a need for mutual respect and understanding. Jane’s wish for sleeping in isn’t an overreaction but a legitimate need for rest. Addressing this issue head-on and finding a compromise can help couples like Jane and Mike strengthen their relationship.
Couples’ therapist Kyle Benson advises people to pay attention to what may seem insignificant, as even little moments can have a big impact. “If you want a better relationship, including healthier conflict, you need to be intentional about cueing into your partner’s bids for attention as well as being direct about yours. Couples who have a wealth of goodwill, connection, and affection can withdraw on those positive feelings in moments of conflict, regardless of the topic”, Benson states.
Remember, it’s never just about the extra sleep—it’s about respecting each other’s space and needs. So next weekend, if your partner wants to sleep in, let them. Trust us, they’ll appreciate it.
What did you think of this story? Share your thoughts in the comments below!
People in the comments side with the girlfriend saying she is not overreacting and that she should put her foot down with the early-bird boyfriend
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What do you think ?
ValdaDeDieu 7 months ago
This is a GIANT red flag. A person who is considerate will be sensitive to your needs. An inconsiderate person, however... DUMP HIM WHILE HE'S "JUST" A BOYFRIEND. It won't get better.
Load More Replies...
Melissa anderson 7 months ago
Her bf is behaving like a childish control freak. I see no reason to keep him around. He obviously doesn’t respect her.
Asexual aromantic sea sponge 7 months ago
As an insomniac if you wake me up you will regret it.
Bexxxx 7 months ago
Same. I can’t stay asleep for more than 3-4 hours without medication, it’s been a struggle my whole life. I moved out from my parents’ house when I was still in high school due to issues like this. When I was 27 I moved back in for ~3 months - even if I worked until 3 or 4am, they would wake me up around 8 every single day. My days off were always so exhausting because I couldn’t even catch up on sleep. I remember just begging a friend to let me “housesit” for her while she was out of town (she was gone for 48 hrs and didn’t need a house sitter at all) just so I could catch up on sleep in her guest bedroom. LET PEOPLE GET THE SLEEP THEY NEED.
Load More Replies...
A S Mora 7 months ago
This dude is a monster. He's getting off on doing something so small, so easy to trivialize and put the blame on her for being upset that it's insidious. Get away from this man!
Jesha 7 months ago
This is actually a common abuse tactic, to mess with someone's sleep schedule.
Diolla 7 months ago
Oh. Now I know why that psycho ex ALWAYS went to bed and made a move on me EXACTLY one hour after I would go to bed, knowing that I woud be a. asleep and b. needing to get up in 5 or 6 hours' time.
Load More Replies...
Yu Pan 7 months ago
My sister came visit one weekend. On Saturday we had plan to go see a show at 7pm. I woke up at 10, she was asleep. I watched TV, ate breakfast, did errands. She woke up at 2 when I was cuddling with my cat on the couch. She asked why I didn't wake her up, I told her I don't see the point of disturbing her rest. Seriously, people need to be more willing to let go a relationship that is not bringing joys to them. Do a Marie Kondo.
dandylilah 7 months ago
Oh honey, check his behavior or break up. Personally, if my husband (or boyfriend) did this I would tell him to F**k off, roll over, and get my extra hour of sleep.
Anna Ekberg 7 months ago
You don't mess with peoples sleep period! I have such a difficult time falling asleep, sometimes it takes me hours to fall asleep and wake up so easily. Just thinking about being in her situation makes my blood boil, i love my sleep. 🛏
DarkViolet 7 months ago
If ANYONE flicked my nose for ANY reason, they would be sporting a wired jaw and dental implants. I don't play that. Ever. OP needs to sit the jerk down and very calmly tell him that 1) this isn't working, and 2) he needs to be out within the week. Then get up and walk away. Don't engage, no matter how much he tries. Just go about your daily routine. Redirect the lava flow elsewhere, so as not to get burned by an abuser.
Saphyre Fyre 7 months ago
Break up. Find another person who respects you and your wishes/needs.
Glasofruix 7 months ago
Totally a control thing. But i'd say fight fire with fire, wake him up at 3am for useless cr@p and see how he likes it.
Stephanie Did It 7 months ago
My now deceased FIL used to come up behind me and flick me on the top of my head. It HURT. If he hadn't been my FIL and in his 70s-80s, he would have been nursing a bloody nose every time. I sternly told him DON'T DO THAT many times but he was a curmudgeon and delighted in being difficult. Had he been my SO however, the second time would have been the last. No question.
Orysha 7 months ago
You should not have restrained yourself. Being old and your FIL is no excuse.
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UpupaEpops 7 months ago
Maybe I've run into one too many AHs but to me, it feels like if OP were to cave in, her boyfriend would eventually try and wake her up at the same time as he does. BF doesn't know what to do with himself for those couple of hours so he's trying to get her on his schedule. Personally, I would break up over this. He is needy, disrespectful and manipulative. Not exactly the traits you would be looking fir in a relationship.
Orysha 7 months ago
I don't think he would stop there. It would end with emotional and physiclal abuse (you start by flicking a nose and what next?)
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Zelda McLink 7 months ago
I have PTSD and can often wake myself up with a scream. If partner woke me up by *flicking my nose*, it's very likely they would get hit by my flailing limbs in a reflex fight or flight response. But then my partner would never do that, because they respect me.
Joey Jo Jo Shabadoo 7 months ago (edited)
(It is not the same as PTSD, and Im not pretending it is) I have had night terrors my whole life where I am half awake and think Im being attacked by things that arent there. I did once hit my aunt who came into my room and woke me by pulling on my nightgown because she terrfied me so much. Somebody knowing I wanted to sleep in and then flicking my nose would earn all my deserving rage.
Load More Replies...
Niki A 7 months ago
"YoU ObVusLy DiDnT gET enoUGh SLeeP.." BECAUSE HE WOKE YOU UP!!!! Do not let this continue!!! This is a manipulative tactic. Some abusers begin this way, and eventually you are getting so little rest that you cannot make logical decisions. This makes it easier to gaslight you and control you further. I promise this is only the beginning.
Gavin Johnson 7 months ago
I have always been a night owl, I love the early hours of the morning. My partner is definitely NOT a night owl, she loves to be curled up in bed long before midnight. Do I force her to stay awake? No. Does she wake me up early in the day? No. Boundaries people, boundaries. If you can’t be trusted to respect someone else’s needs should you even be in a relationship?
Seedy Vine 7 months ago
My mother could never sleep and was downright vicious to anyone who dared try to sleep in or nap around her. Nobody could ever relax around her. It was so abusive and manipulative. OP, I would not stick around. Manipulative people usually have more than one rotten move.
Gustav Gallifrey 7 months ago
He wakes her up by flicking her nose. So, she should then put him to sleep by flicking his head. With a truncheon.
Natasha Clark 7 months ago
Control freak alert!! I guarantee you his mother did this to him when he was a child & it stuck like glue. She needs to stop complaining to the internet about it & dump him already.
Binny Tutera 7 months ago
So, he wakes her up an HOUR earlier than her alarm, and when she gets mad he blames it on a lack of sleep??? Run, run, run!
meeeeeeeeeeee 7 months ago
I'd be petty and start waking up extra early every day to wake him up ( and 100% he'd go psycho the very first time she did it) but it's a lack of boundaries and he can't change with communication, doesn't bode well for bigger issues in the future
Louise Clarke 7 months ago
When I spend the weekend at the guy I've been seeing's house he always gets up early, and he always lets me sleep in.
Sister Mary Jane 7 months ago
This guy is a jerk and a control freak. Leave. It won't get better.
Malinalli Patron 7 months ago
Do not ignore the RED flag, think and you will find more ways he has used to control you, dump him.
Janelle Collard 7 months ago
WHY is she still with this total POS control freak??? Kick his a** out!!!
Jus 7 months ago
Anyone who wakes me up at ANY hour will have it hard. Not letting me sleep in on my free day?? Oh boyyyy. He'd be so dead. I'd leave. There's no way I would forgive that disrespect.
whiterabbit 7 months ago
Yea he needs to grow up. I am an early riser, my BF sleeps in. It does annoy me sometimes because I feel like I end up cleaning the house way more than him since I'm already up and like my house tidy but overall I actually enjoy my alone time to sip my coffee without having to listen to the TV, which he incessantly has to have on. Your SO does not have to be by your side every waking moment of your life.
Justbecause 7 months ago
Let me guess, its her place and she earns more money than him. Its a power move he needs to be kicked out.
Just stopping by 7 months ago
Oh he would be dumped and homeless in a heartbeat. Don’t mess with my sleep.
WonderWoman 7 months ago
When people show you who they are, believe them. OPs BF has shown her that he doesn't have an ounce of respect for her and thinks his way it the only way.
JayWantsACat 7 months ago
As someone that has always had problems sleeping, messing with me and sleep is one of the things that sets me off into a rage. Needless to say I wasn't a morning person growing up and my mom waking me up because a friend called (about a non-important, non-emergency) is f*****g ridiculous to me and reasonable to be angry about. Ironically, I still can't sleep but rarely like sleeping in. So, I would never be this guy. She's on top of getting up in time to makes sure they're not late and things are handled in time. This feels like a control thing because he can't be on his own for a few hours, FFS?
nanofarad 7 months ago
I can bet he is just bored. He doesn't want to wait any longer. When you want to get your day started and the SO is still sleeping it can gnaw you. He needs to find something to do to distract himself. This is not proper behavior, but I doubt he has ever had to deal with other people that sleep in. He most likely grew up in an early morning family. You just have to train him.
Ace 7 months ago
Train him instead to (quietly) bring you a cup of tea or coffee, put it next to your bed and let you drink it (or not) whenever you're ready. Being awakened in a genlte way by the noise of him doing so but then not pressured to get up should allow him to feel that he's "helping" without it being such an issue for you. . . . . . Or yeah, as others have said, just dump the controlling arsehole.
FreeTheUnicorn 7 months ago
Dont train a partner. You aren't raising them. OP used her words and showed him respect, he chose not to show respect. He's a grown man and has had opportunities to lean empathy and respect, but obviously chose a different path. This is a relatively small thing, but if he thinks no is negotiable, it will only get worse. They aren't compatible.
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Pearl Paxton 5 months ago
What he's doing is ridiculous rude and definitely a sign that he's trying to control this situation despite the fact that you've asked then told him to stop, plus he won't give you a reason that makes sense why he does this SMH HUGE RED FLAG, sorry but this is just the beginning of annoying things he's going to be doing that will p**s you off, that is if there are other red flags you've seen but are not speaking of. Best to drop him and run...FAST and NEVER look back. He'd not appreciate you flicking his nose to wake hum up earlier then agreed upon time, just rude disrespectful and rude, you need your sleep as much as he does...he's a morning person, you're not, his problem not yours and he needs to get use to that and respect you when you are asleep. Otherwise is bye bye morning bird, plain as that. 🤷🏾
Andrew Arons 5 months ago
If the guy wanted to wake her up early in a positive way, he could always put on a pot of coffee and make breakfast. And maybe strategically position a fan so the aroma wafts from the kitchen into the bedroom. That's how we evil geniuses roll.😎
Melissa Neubauer 6 months ago
I hope she dumped him. This is 100% him starting to control her.
Couragetcd 6 months ago
Shame, the poll didn't have an option for glare and go back to sleep. Even if I couldn't sleep, I would stay in my comfy spot relaxed with my eyes closed.
Gritsonamission 6 months ago
New title: Narcissist tries to deprive his girlfriend of rest-girlfriend NTA. Ruuun, girl! Quietly and quickly. Unless it's your house. Then, warn him he's homeless if he ever disrespects your boundaries like that again. WHEN it happens, cause it WILL happen, take a sick day. Have a friend join you. Pack his things nice and neat. Put them on the lawn. Change the locks. Leave a note saying he'll have to wake up pretty early in the morning to con you the way he has tried, and he just isn't smart enough for that. A boundary is the boundary, PERIOD.
Joy Bertrand 6 months ago
Run, don’t walk from this controlling a—hole. He doesn’t respect you. Denying sleep is a torture tactic. Put his s— in the front yard and change the locks.
Binky Melnik 6 months ago
What kinda loving partner FLICKS A NOSE to wake someone?! A massive, MASSIVE 🫏🕳️. You wake the one you love with butterfly kisses and snuggles, not FLICKING, you complete and utter asshat!
Kare Deter 6 months ago
I had to have this talk with my husband who would wake me up if I fell asleep on the couch so that I could go to bed. We discussed how that wasn't a good idea, just leave me be until I wake up and move myself. Now he just covers me with a blanket if it's chilly and leaves me where I fell asleep. THAT is a loving relationship. Respects my wishes. He doesn't understand them but he respects them.
carol bland 6 months ago
Helpfully flick my nose to wake me up? I will kindly break your f*cking fingers to teach you not to! He is abusive and controlling.
Ivy at Eve 6 months ago
I'm usually at the side of trying to work things out than cry divorce or split immediately. DUMP him. He doesn't respect you, upsets you deliberately and withholding sleep is a torture method. Run, don't walk. If he says you're petty to split over this, tell him he is lucky he found out now.
Christine Stewart 6 months ago
He is apparently a spoiled child or a Golden Retriever puppy who can't understand why you have boundaries such as letting you sleep in, when he is bored and wants you to entertain him!
Jaybird3939 6 months ago
I am NOT a morning person and sleeping in for me is bliss. One time he may make the mistake, the 2nd time he'd get his face chewed off and then out the door. This is so controlling and disrespectful! Can you imagine if you have kids? Is he constantly going to go in and wake kids up when HE thinks they should get up? What's he going to try to control next? Farewell, goodbye, so long, Sayonara
Rebecca Joan 6 months ago
I like that they have the question at the end, but the woman already said clear boundaries and was disrespected. Kick him the f**k out.
Matthew Barabas 6 months ago
you really should be getting up at the same time, regardless if you have plans or not. its how you can sleep well. but him waking you up is probably a war crime. :P
ValdaDeDieu 7 months ago
This is a GIANT red flag. A person who is considerate will be sensitive to your needs. An inconsiderate person, however... DUMP HIM WHILE HE'S "JUST" A BOYFRIEND. It won't get better.
Load More Replies... Melissa anderson 7 months ago
Her bf is behaving like a childish control freak. I see no reason to keep him around. He obviously doesn’t respect her.
Asexual aromantic sea sponge 7 months ago
As an insomniac if you wake me up you will regret it.
Bexxxx 7 months ago
Same. I can’t stay asleep for more than 3-4 hours without medication, it’s been a struggle my whole life. I moved out from my parents’ house when I was still in high school due to issues like this. When I was 27 I moved back in for ~3 months - even if I worked until 3 or 4am, they would wake me up around 8 every single day. My days off were always so exhausting because I couldn’t even catch up on sleep. I remember just begging a friend to let me “housesit” for her while she was out of town (she was gone for 48 hrs and didn’t need a house sitter at all) just so I could catch up on sleep in her guest bedroom. LET PEOPLE GET THE SLEEP THEY NEED.
Load More Replies... A S Mora 7 months ago
This dude is a monster. He's getting off on doing something so small, so easy to trivialize and put the blame on her for being upset that it's insidious. Get away from this man!
Jesha 7 months ago
This is actually a common abuse tactic, to mess with someone's sleep schedule.
Diolla 7 months ago
Oh. Now I know why that psycho ex ALWAYS went to bed and made a move on me EXACTLY one hour after I would go to bed, knowing that I woud be a. asleep and b. needing to get up in 5 or 6 hours' time.
Load More Replies... Yu Pan 7 months ago
My sister came visit one weekend. On Saturday we had plan to go see a show at 7pm. I woke up at 10, she was asleep. I watched TV, ate breakfast, did errands. She woke up at 2 when I was cuddling with my cat on the couch. She asked why I didn't wake her up, I told her I don't see the point of disturbing her rest. Seriously, people need to be more willing to let go a relationship that is not bringing joys to them. Do a Marie Kondo.
dandylilah 7 months ago
Oh honey, check his behavior or break up. Personally, if my husband (or boyfriend) did this I would tell him to F**k off, roll over, and get my extra hour of sleep.
Anna Ekberg 7 months ago
You don't mess with peoples sleep period! I have such a difficult time falling asleep, sometimes it takes me hours to fall asleep and wake up so easily. Just thinking about being in her situation makes my blood boil, i love my sleep. 🛏
DarkViolet 7 months ago
If ANYONE flicked my nose for ANY reason, they would be sporting a wired jaw and dental implants. I don't play that. Ever. OP needs to sit the jerk down and very calmly tell him that 1) this isn't working, and 2) he needs to be out within the week. Then get up and walk away. Don't engage, no matter how much he tries. Just go about your daily routine. Redirect the lava flow elsewhere, so as not to get burned by an abuser.
Saphyre Fyre 7 months ago
Break up. Find another person who respects you and your wishes/needs.
Glasofruix 7 months ago
Totally a control thing. But i'd say fight fire with fire, wake him up at 3am for useless cr@p and see how he likes it.
Stephanie Did It 7 months ago
My now deceased FIL used to come up behind me and flick me on the top of my head. It HURT. If he hadn't been my FIL and in his 70s-80s, he would have been nursing a bloody nose every time. I sternly told him DON'T DO THAT many times but he was a curmudgeon and delighted in being difficult. Had he been my SO however, the second time would have been the last. No question.
Orysha 7 months ago
You should not have restrained yourself. Being old and your FIL is no excuse.
Load More Replies... UpupaEpops 7 months ago
Maybe I've run into one too many AHs but to me, it feels like if OP were to cave in, her boyfriend would eventually try and wake her up at the same time as he does. BF doesn't know what to do with himself for those couple of hours so he's trying to get her on his schedule. Personally, I would break up over this. He is needy, disrespectful and manipulative. Not exactly the traits you would be looking fir in a relationship.
Orysha 7 months ago
I don't think he would stop there. It would end with emotional and physiclal abuse (you start by flicking a nose and what next?)
Load More Replies... Zelda McLink 7 months ago
I have PTSD and can often wake myself up with a scream. If partner woke me up by *flicking my nose*, it's very likely they would get hit by my flailing limbs in a reflex fight or flight response. But then my partner would never do that, because they respect me.
Joey Jo Jo Shabadoo 7 months ago (edited)
(It is not the same as PTSD, and Im not pretending it is) I have had night terrors my whole life where I am half awake and think Im being attacked by things that arent there. I did once hit my aunt who came into my room and woke me by pulling on my nightgown because she terrfied me so much. Somebody knowing I wanted to sleep in and then flicking my nose would earn all my deserving rage.
Load More Replies... Niki A 7 months ago
"YoU ObVusLy DiDnT gET enoUGh SLeeP.." BECAUSE HE WOKE YOU UP!!!! Do not let this continue!!! This is a manipulative tactic. Some abusers begin this way, and eventually you are getting so little rest that you cannot make logical decisions. This makes it easier to gaslight you and control you further. I promise this is only the beginning.
Gavin Johnson 7 months ago
I have always been a night owl, I love the early hours of the morning. My partner is definitely NOT a night owl, she loves to be curled up in bed long before midnight. Do I force her to stay awake? No. Does she wake me up early in the day? No. Boundaries people, boundaries. If you can’t be trusted to respect someone else’s needs should you even be in a relationship?
Seedy Vine 7 months ago
My mother could never sleep and was downright vicious to anyone who dared try to sleep in or nap around her. Nobody could ever relax around her. It was so abusive and manipulative. OP, I would not stick around. Manipulative people usually have more than one rotten move.
Gustav Gallifrey 7 months ago
He wakes her up by flicking her nose. So, she should then put him to sleep by flicking his head. With a truncheon.
Natasha Clark 7 months ago
Control freak alert!! I guarantee you his mother did this to him when he was a child & it stuck like glue. She needs to stop complaining to the internet about it & dump him already.
Binny Tutera 7 months ago
So, he wakes her up an HOUR earlier than her alarm, and when she gets mad he blames it on a lack of sleep??? Run, run, run!
meeeeeeeeeeee 7 months ago
I'd be petty and start waking up extra early every day to wake him up ( and 100% he'd go psycho the very first time she did it) but it's a lack of boundaries and he can't change with communication, doesn't bode well for bigger issues in the future
Louise Clarke 7 months ago
When I spend the weekend at the guy I've been seeing's house he always gets up early, and he always lets me sleep in.
Sister Mary Jane 7 months ago
This guy is a jerk and a control freak. Leave. It won't get better.
Malinalli Patron 7 months ago
Do not ignore the RED flag, think and you will find more ways he has used to control you, dump him.
Janelle Collard 7 months ago
WHY is she still with this total POS control freak??? Kick his a** out!!!
Jus 7 months ago
Anyone who wakes me up at ANY hour will have it hard. Not letting me sleep in on my free day?? Oh boyyyy. He'd be so dead. I'd leave. There's no way I would forgive that disrespect.
whiterabbit 7 months ago
Yea he needs to grow up. I am an early riser, my BF sleeps in. It does annoy me sometimes because I feel like I end up cleaning the house way more than him since I'm already up and like my house tidy but overall I actually enjoy my alone time to sip my coffee without having to listen to the TV, which he incessantly has to have on. Your SO does not have to be by your side every waking moment of your life.
Justbecause 7 months ago
Let me guess, its her place and she earns more money than him. Its a power move he needs to be kicked out.
Just stopping by 7 months ago
Oh he would be dumped and homeless in a heartbeat. Don’t mess with my sleep.
WonderWoman 7 months ago
When people show you who they are, believe them. OPs BF has shown her that he doesn't have an ounce of respect for her and thinks his way it the only way.
JayWantsACat 7 months ago
As someone that has always had problems sleeping, messing with me and sleep is one of the things that sets me off into a rage. Needless to say I wasn't a morning person growing up and my mom waking me up because a friend called (about a non-important, non-emergency) is f*****g ridiculous to me and reasonable to be angry about. Ironically, I still can't sleep but rarely like sleeping in. So, I would never be this guy. She's on top of getting up in time to makes sure they're not late and things are handled in time. This feels like a control thing because he can't be on his own for a few hours, FFS?
nanofarad 7 months ago
I can bet he is just bored. He doesn't want to wait any longer. When you want to get your day started and the SO is still sleeping it can gnaw you. He needs to find something to do to distract himself. This is not proper behavior, but I doubt he has ever had to deal with other people that sleep in. He most likely grew up in an early morning family. You just have to train him.
Ace 7 months ago
Train him instead to (quietly) bring you a cup of tea or coffee, put it next to your bed and let you drink it (or not) whenever you're ready. Being awakened in a genlte way by the noise of him doing so but then not pressured to get up should allow him to feel that he's "helping" without it being such an issue for you. . . . . . Or yeah, as others have said, just dump the controlling arsehole.
FreeTheUnicorn 7 months ago
Dont train a partner. You aren't raising them. OP used her words and showed him respect, he chose not to show respect. He's a grown man and has had opportunities to lean empathy and respect, but obviously chose a different path. This is a relatively small thing, but if he thinks no is negotiable, it will only get worse. They aren't compatible.
Load More Replies... Pearl Paxton 5 months ago
What he's doing is ridiculous rude and definitely a sign that he's trying to control this situation despite the fact that you've asked then told him to stop, plus he won't give you a reason that makes sense why he does this SMH HUGE RED FLAG, sorry but this is just the beginning of annoying things he's going to be doing that will p**s you off, that is if there are other red flags you've seen but are not speaking of. Best to drop him and run...FAST and NEVER look back. He'd not appreciate you flicking his nose to wake hum up earlier then agreed upon time, just rude disrespectful and rude, you need your sleep as much as he does...he's a morning person, you're not, his problem not yours and he needs to get use to that and respect you when you are asleep. Otherwise is bye bye morning bird, plain as that. 🤷🏾
Andrew Arons 5 months ago
If the guy wanted to wake her up early in a positive way, he could always put on a pot of coffee and make breakfast. And maybe strategically position a fan so the aroma wafts from the kitchen into the bedroom. That's how we evil geniuses roll.😎
Melissa Neubauer 6 months ago
I hope she dumped him. This is 100% him starting to control her.
Couragetcd 6 months ago
Shame, the poll didn't have an option for glare and go back to sleep. Even if I couldn't sleep, I would stay in my comfy spot relaxed with my eyes closed.
Gritsonamission 6 months ago
New title: Narcissist tries to deprive his girlfriend of rest-girlfriend NTA. Ruuun, girl! Quietly and quickly. Unless it's your house. Then, warn him he's homeless if he ever disrespects your boundaries like that again. WHEN it happens, cause it WILL happen, take a sick day. Have a friend join you. Pack his things nice and neat. Put them on the lawn. Change the locks. Leave a note saying he'll have to wake up pretty early in the morning to con you the way he has tried, and he just isn't smart enough for that. A boundary is the boundary, PERIOD.
Joy Bertrand 6 months ago
Run, don’t walk from this controlling a—hole. He doesn’t respect you. Denying sleep is a torture tactic. Put his s— in the front yard and change the locks.
Binky Melnik 6 months ago
What kinda loving partner FLICKS A NOSE to wake someone?! A massive, MASSIVE 🫏🕳️. You wake the one you love with butterfly kisses and snuggles, not FLICKING, you complete and utter asshat!
Kare Deter 6 months ago
I had to have this talk with my husband who would wake me up if I fell asleep on the couch so that I could go to bed. We discussed how that wasn't a good idea, just leave me be until I wake up and move myself. Now he just covers me with a blanket if it's chilly and leaves me where I fell asleep. THAT is a loving relationship. Respects my wishes. He doesn't understand them but he respects them.
carol bland 6 months ago
Helpfully flick my nose to wake me up? I will kindly break your f*cking fingers to teach you not to! He is abusive and controlling.
Ivy at Eve 6 months ago
I'm usually at the side of trying to work things out than cry divorce or split immediately. DUMP him. He doesn't respect you, upsets you deliberately and withholding sleep is a torture method. Run, don't walk. If he says you're petty to split over this, tell him he is lucky he found out now.
Christine Stewart 6 months ago
He is apparently a spoiled child or a Golden Retriever puppy who can't understand why you have boundaries such as letting you sleep in, when he is bored and wants you to entertain him!
Jaybird3939 6 months ago
I am NOT a morning person and sleeping in for me is bliss. One time he may make the mistake, the 2nd time he'd get his face chewed off and then out the door. This is so controlling and disrespectful! Can you imagine if you have kids? Is he constantly going to go in and wake kids up when HE thinks they should get up? What's he going to try to control next? Farewell, goodbye, so long, Sayonara
Rebecca Joan 6 months ago
I like that they have the question at the end, but the woman already said clear boundaries and was disrespected. Kick him the f**k out.
Matthew Barabas 6 months ago
you really should be getting up at the same time, regardless if you have plans or not. its how you can sleep well. but him waking you up is probably a war crime. :P
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