While having kids seems like a breeze, let me reassure you that it is, however, not the case. It’s a huge financial, emotional, social, and health commitment that just happens and you gotta accept it.

That is, unfortunately, above the heads of this family who flat out demanded their “black sheep” daughter would be a surrogate for her golden child sister, despite having gone through an extremely risky birthing herself.

The knee-jerk reaction to considering kids is to think about anything but the health risks involved—but they ought to be considered first

Image credits: Andrew Seaman (not the actual photo)

This family, however, gave zero consideration for their daughter when they flat out demanded to be a surrogate for her sister

Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Ok_Yogurtcloset_4616

All it did was create an even bigger divide in the family and it left the daughter feeling awful about storming out, despite her having a right to

A woman recently turned to Reddit for advice on a family matter. Long story short, she was asked (in a demanding way) by her estranged family to be a surrogate for her sister, who’s infertile.

Having always had heart problems—and that caused a complicated and risky birth herself with her firstborn—she tried to explain why she couldn’t. The family didn’t have a good track record of being nice, and it only continued in this last conversation, after which OP simply stormed out.

Well, Redditors were all there to support her. The general tone in the comment section was that OP was not a jerk to refuse—she’d be encouraged to do the same even if she didn’t have health problems due to the family’s abusiveness.

In fact, many suggested going no contact with the family. Entitlement and arrogance aside, folks were quick to point out the ludicrous move with the card congratulating on the surrogacy and the fact that any doctor overseeing the surrogacy would flat out laugh the sister out of the room for presenting OP’s medical history.

Image credits: Dương Nhân (not the actual photo)

And speaking of disqualification, yes, there are factors that can deny folks surrogacy

The green light for surrogacy is determined on a case by case basis as there are many personal factors to consider. In rare cases, even some disqualifying factors can be viewed flexibly if they are isolated and mild.

However, there’s ample reason for a doc to not approve a surrogacy, including the obvious causes directly related to all things birthing, i.e. Polycystic Ovary Syndrome, Preeclampsia, Endometriosis.

Even conditions that aren’t directly related are included, e.g. mental illness that requires medication to treat and an unhealthy BMI. Heck, you don’t even need a condition to not qualify—no history of childbirth, drug use, and not being of legal age are also deal breaking factors.

And even though some factors can be flexible, like some sexually transmitted diseases, requirements can vary depending on the surrogacy agency, clinic, and personal health, and a person will have to go through a number of screening procedures anyway, so there’s ample reason for doctors to look out for the woman’s best interest in the case of a risky pregnancy.

So, what are your thoughts on any of this? Share your takes and stories in the comment section below!

Image credits: freestocks (not the actual photo)

The author of the post also provided more information as responses to people’s takes in the comment section

The subreddit’s take on the situation was a unanimous ‘not a jerk’

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