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When we meet someone new, it can take a while to get to know them and decide if we can trust them. And that’s totally fine—it’s a smart move to take your time.
But sometimes, there are little signs that give away someone’s genuine kindness right from the start.
Redditors have been talking about traits like these, and we’ve rounded up their most interesting takes for you below. Scroll down to see if you agree and let us know your thoughts in the comments!
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#1
Got a cancer diagnosis in January. I had just started dating this woman, she came with me to my first appointment for chemo. I'm thinking to myself as I'm sitting there, this is it she is gonna bail so quick once the side effects start. She was there for me. Every. Single. Time. Made it through the treatments, and now I'm cancer free and married her in August.
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#2
They do good things for others without expecting something in return.
DennyS (denzoren) 4 hours ago
1000% but also not to the point that their kindness isn't being used/exploited.
#3
They are able to be happy for other people. It’s a vanishing skill these days to be able to just honestly be happy for someone who succeeds and not be snarky about it.
Karl der Große 25 minutes ago
I'm often happy for other people, but I can remember when I would get resentful. I think it is something that comes with maturity.
#4
They authentically apologize when they are wrong or when they make a mistake without anyone asking them to. They can let go of ego for the sake of what is right. On the opposite side of the same coin, they have a forgiving nature.
Beak Hookage 5 hours ago
You have to really, REALLY push it for me to decide I'm never going to forgive you.
#5
I’m a kind person but my guy? He’s a GOOD man. No one will scroll far enough to read this so why not brag on him.
My partner is almost 50, big quiet man. Been working in construction for over 30 years. He hires subs to do a lot of the specialized jobs, like painters. He’s been hiring these painters as long as he’s been in the business. About a week or so ago, the owners of the home they are building were having a party holiday party for the crew, interior designer, and architect. My partner got an igloo mug and Christmas card, inside was a nice bonus, in cash. He thanked them and went to check on the rest of the crew. He noticed all the “main” crew got the igloo mug and a card, with some cash, except the 5 painters. They just got igloo mugs, which is fine, the owners didn’t need to give anyone ANYTHING that’s on the business they work for. But my guy knows these guys. This year they had lost the owner of the painting business and the father of one of them. 2 of the guys just started families. They are like his main crew! He took his bonus, gave each of them some of the money and wished them a Merry Christmas. They tried to refuse. They told him they were fine. But my quiet guy, did what he does best, ignored them and walked off. No need for props or thank yous. Just a good heart.
THAT IS A GOOD MAN.
#6
They’re polite to people they have authority over.
Justanotherpanda 7 hours ago
The are polite to everyone, not just the ones they have authority over.
#7
That guy or girl that tries to integrate you in conversations in a pretty organic and not showing off way. Specially when you’re introvert.
DennyS (denzoren) 4 hours ago
Or the one that makes sure you're cool from time to time...speaking as the introvert in question lol
#8
Their genuine kindness towards those weaker than themselves.
Animals immediately feel comfortable around them.
#9
People who are able to laugh at themselves, especially after falling down in public, oh and they are totally okay with others laughing as well because sometimes it's just silly being human.
#10
They are the one in the group who stops and waits for you while you to tie your shoe or they hold the door as the rest of the group keeps moving.
kkrq2vk4tm 4 hours ago
Is it etiquette to wait for someone to tie their shoe lace if so it's one that passed me by but it a kind gesture to just wait for someone so that don't feel left behind
#11
One of my favorite sayings is “Principles only mean something if you stand up for them when it’s inconvenient.” When people stand up for what’s right at a time when it isn’t convenient, that’s a good person.
Plenty Pineapples 4 hours ago
So many people that assume that they would have spoken out against antisemitism 90 years ago are now slient because it's not popular and inconvenient...
#12
When they are kind to cashiers and servers
Adrian Sparkles 7 hours ago
This is gold for me. How simple is it to be nice and wish them a nice day.
#13
They intervene when someone is being a jacka*s to someone else.
Jayjay 2 hours ago
This one is extremely important. Bullies can only continue with their bullying someone because of the joiners who keep quiet when someone is bullied. The joiners are too afraid of the bully, because a bully always need someone to bully. When one victim is gone, the bully will look for a next victim. Standing up alone against a bully can therefore be very scary. Joiners should join together to stand up against the bully around the victim, and isolate the bully instead of the victim.
#14
Being kind to animals, they don't judge us nor give something of monetary value in return. The only reason to be kind to them is because you're kind.
Adrian Sparkles 7 hours ago
If my cat likes you when you enter my home you are half way to perfect. Sheena is an excellent judge
#16
They treat people that cannot do anything for them very well.
Beak Hookage 5 hours ago
When someone is only nice to those they want something from while being utterly cold or indifferent to everyone else, that's a huge red flag right there.
#17
They don't need a list of rules nor exterior validation in order to make decisions for the sake of greater good.
Good people don't not commit armed burglary because its *illegal* - they don't commit armed burglary because it's a s****y human thing to do.
#18
The one guy in high school who’s friends with the “weird”, quiet kids and the “popular” kids at the same time.
Just treating everyone with respect, even when others don’t do the same.
Beak Hookage 5 hours ago (edited)
One of the best things I did this year was when I started taking classes I noticed that the youngest of my classmates was always sitting by himself well away from the rest of us. He was neurodiverse and clearly troubled. I immediately started making friendly overtures, in part because I used to BE that kid, and soon he was sitting next to me for every class and would wait for me afterwards so we could walk together. By the end he was talking to everyone and very much part of the group. Later on I bumped into him with some of his friends including his girlfriend, and the girlfriend took me aside and said she wanted to thank me for how much I'd helped him.
#19
When they pick up other peoples trash without making a big deal about it.
#20
They treat 'ugly' and 'fat' people like people. So many times as a big person I've been overlooked and literally cut out of group conversations because of my size (had confirmation of this not guessing). The good person would always bring me into the conversation and talk to me outside of the group.
Smeghead Tribble Down Under 7 hours ago
This happens to me often. Being ignored, I mean, not included. Because I'M the good person but also fat, so I'm the one who gets excluded/ignored/sneered at/made to feel worthless. I wish there were two of me, so I could be nice to me.
#21
I was one of 40 or so people from my church feeding the homeless at the Salvation Army shelter one night. I dumped a bag of dinner rolls into a bowl. "Don't just dump them", our group leader said; "presentation is important".
I rearranged them nicely. Treating everyone with respect, be they guests in your home or homeless people in a shelter, is a mark of a genuinely good person.
Traveling Lady Railfan 1 hour ago
In the end, if you're hungry, food is food no matter how it's presented but yes. If you have the time, taking a moment to improve the presentation makes everyone feel more human, more respected.
#22
They fill you in / include you in an existing convo that you’ve just joined.
DennyS (denzoren) 4 hours ago
I can't remember the movie but I like to use the line "let me bring you up to speed...we still don't know what we're doing here or why....you are now up to speed' lol
#23
Here's one, you mention: "man I have to get to this location" and the person goes "oh dw, I can give you a ride."
For no reason but to be nice.
You'll notice a LOT of people never offer this, good people do.
Traveling Lady Railfan 1 hour ago
That depends a lot on other factors. As a single female, I can't just be giving strangers or just met acquaintances rides places. But I have given neighbors and co-workers a ride when they need it, no questions asked. You do have to be careful.
#24
Actively listening to you as you’re talking
Engaging in conversations that you’ve started or are interested in
Will show up when they say are coming
Can turn down your event, without being a d**k about it (saying yes then not showing up or using an excuse to not go).
#25
They share their favourite food with you. I don't know what it is but I really appreciate the food sharing.
#26
They ask you about something you told them before to see how things are going. They remember little bits of information about you and ask you about it.
#27
They attract good people, regardless of social income or ranking. It was the first sign I had that my SO was a good person. He was very liked at work as a manager and whenever he had friends around, they all seemed to have good energy (like good values and qualities). Also, people felt comfortable enough to share personal things with him. I did. I worked a year with him and the feeling that he was good just got stronger with time. 8 years-ish later, I was spot on on my character judgement. Not only is he a good person and partner, he is an awesome dad as well :).
#28
It's easy to be a good person when things are easy.
A true good person will remain good when they are angry, or scared, etc. If your morals evaporate under stress, you don't actually have morals.
Beak Hookage 5 hours ago
We've all said things we shouldn't have in moments of anger. A good person is the one who pretty much immediately thinks "aw hell why did I say that, that was way out of line" and apologises.
#29
Their default expectation is that people are generally good.
I don't mean that they're naive, they're aware that some people are a******s, that crime happens. But they don't automatically assume strangers are up to no good, that people are trying to screw them over. They're willing to extend a bit of grace when someone is a.bit rude (maybe that person is just having an off day).
Kyra Noelle 2 hours ago
My experience is that when people blame or accuse are usually the ones guilty and projecting on to others.
#30
When you’re in a conversation with multiple people and you keep getting interrupted and they say something like “wait, were you saying about ___?” to make sure you’re included and to signify that they are listening.
#31
I work with second graders (ages 7/8) and I can sum them up in two ways. When they notice someone cry or feel left out they will either
A.) make fun of/tease the kid who is upset (ex. “Bro is really crying over nothing”)
B.) feel genuinely sorry and give them something (ex. Part of their snack or draw them a picture).
#32
I have a friend who got hurt a while ago, needed hospitalization. She came back to her home after surgery, and family members were helping her, friends were helping her, etc. She can hardly move, body/legs all tore up.
During this time, one of her friends -- a guy who I assumed was just sort of a simp and probably would be scarce until she was "hot" again -- showed up at her house while we were there helping her. He said "hi," and then went into the kitchen and cleaned it. Then he made her favorite meal, boxed it up, put it in the fridge, told her it was there when she needed it, cleaned up any mess, and said, "bye."
He literally showed up to talk to no one, just to clean and leave her something nice, and never made a big deal, didn't even disrupt our conversations. After he left we wandered into the kitchen to find it spotless, even the pot he used for cooking was washed and put away. Seems he tidied up the entry way too.
I suppose he might still be a simp, but if he is, he's not asking for attention, and he's super helpful. I've decided I think he's great.
**EDIT:** Since in the replies someone completely misunderstood my post, I'm going to clarify. I am not suggesting that because a guy made a woman her favorite meal that he is a simp. I am not suggesting that because he did something nice, he is a simp. No. I am suggesting that his *previous behavior* gave me the impression that he is a simp, but that now I think he might just be trying to be a genuine friend. In other words, him making the favorite meal, or doing something nice, made me more inclined to think he is just a "good person" as OP asked for.
So, why do I say he seemed to be a simp? Well, she is very pretty and has a boyfriend, and a cluster of other "hanging on" guys that sorta are in her orbit. This other guy, our kitchen-cleaning main character? He would come over multiple times a week, after his job, and just hang out at their house, and try to subtly engage with her, in front of her boyfriend. Because the boys were friends, the boyfriend mostly said nothing, and didn't want to tell her who she could have as friends. But a lot of the other guy's behavior was sus. For example, although these people are in their late 20s and early 30s, this kitchen cleaning guy would do juvenile things like steal her keys and then have her chase him around the house trying to get it back. At one point, he ran into her bedroom with the keys and the two of them were giggling in there while I sat in another room with the boyfriend who just looked... uncomfortable. I ended up "checking" on them and just grabbing the keys and giving them back to her.
And I would note that she was not encouraging the behavior, despite her running around giggling. *She is very oblivious* and is constantly blindsided when guys profess their love for her. She'll say really oblivious things when they profess their love, such as, "But I've had a boyfriend this entire time!" We've had to, many times, tell her that some guys just like to hang around on the fringes, hoping to be the rebound partner when she breaks up with her main guy. We had to spend a few days comforting her once, when she lost a friend who was in love with her, because he told her that he couldn't stand to see her happy with another guy and was going no contact. She was devastated, because she had known him for years and assumed they were genuine friends, no sexual/romantic anything.
Kitchen-cleaning guy has offered her backrubs (to which I just chimed in, "I think her boyfriend can do that"), sits on chat waiting for her to log on, gets interested in whatever show is her current favorite so they can talk about it, etc. Most of it is harmless, and maybe even has good intentions behind it, but putting it all together led me to think, "simp." But now, seeing him repeatedly do kind things and ask for no attention and/or no time -- he just helps and leaves -- I'm more inclined to think he's just a genuine friend. Maybe he had some bad boundaries previously, but my opinion about him is changing. Which was the point of my story.
Aileen Grist 5 hours ago
Sounds like he's just not very worldly/socially well adjusted/sees people not genders.
#33
They always put their shopping carts away.
Igor914624 3 hours ago
I will give a pass to the mother trying to load 3 young kids into the minivan a pass on this. It is not good to leave kids unattended while returning a shopping cart. Then I will grab it and return it.
#35
Getting mistreated
in my experience, people with the best hearts are done the dirtiest by other people.
so if u see someone get mistreated, they might be incredibly kind themselves.
#36
They clean the lint out of the dryer when they are done, because they leave it like they'd like to find it.
Uncle Schmickle 4 hours ago
YES ... leaving things as ( or better ) than they found them is really important. My parents taught me this when I was a child (I'm 74 now), so what's gone wrong with children's upbringing and morals/ethics ?
#39
Doesn’t cancel plans unnecessarily.
#41
When they talk about politics they get upset about how its going to affect even the people spreading the misinformation …. That takes an overabundance of empathy for a fellow human being.
#42
They can't imitate a convincing evil laugh.
ChimeraBubbles 3 hours ago
I'm sorry but this is just ridiculous. What does vocal ability have to do with being a good person? Everyone should be working on developing a good cackle for their crone/codger/fogey years.
What do you think ?
Trillian 7 hours ago (edited)
I do most of these things but would not consider myself a particularly good person? Most of these just rank "have some effing manners and don't be a complete tool".
ADJ 6 hours ago
Exactly. Good people do not label themselves "good", just normal, decent human being. So you are indeed a good person.
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Hammerfairy 46 minutes ago
Truly good persons use their empathy to actually do something good, regularily.
Trillian 7 hours ago (edited)
I do most of these things but would not consider myself a particularly good person? Most of these just rank "have some effing manners and don't be a complete tool".
ADJ 6 hours ago
Exactly. Good people do not label themselves "good", just normal, decent human being. So you are indeed a good person.
Load More Replies... Hammerfairy 46 minutes ago
Truly good persons use their empathy to actually do something good, regularily.
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