Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
then open in external browser
and click "Open in External Browser" 
Emotional Last Words Heard By Medical Staff From Patients On Their Deathbeds (30 Moments)
The final moments of life often carry immense weight and significance. For those working in the medical field, these moments can be particularly moving and, at times, haunting. The words spoken by patients in their last breaths can leave a lasting impact on the healthcare providers or family members who witness them. These words can be reflective, regretful, or even chilling, resonating deeply with those who hear them.
Recently, a thread appeared in the AskReddit community, where netizens shared some of the most emotional last words they have heard from dying people. As of today, the thread has collected 14K upvotes and almost 4k comments, revealing a variety of touching experiences from the front lines of healthcare.
More info: Reddit
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Never really had any scary ones. Most of my work has been in cancer, and so they've either died in a relatively comfortable manner with palliative care or they've tended to go pretty suddenly.
My favourite was a chap who was unresponsive for a few days, woke up suddenly and asked for a Cornetto (ice cream, not a croissant). A nurse popped to the shops and got him one, he ate it, and then closed his eyes and died. Dude just had to get one last cornetto in. Legend.
MagicJacket 1 year ago
He used his moment of Terminal Lucidity, his "rally" like a boss. I admire that fellow.
Ephemera Image 1 year ago
Aw, that's a nice story. I hope I get kind nurses like that. Palliative care nurses are the best.
Yer Maw Lorna 1 year ago
Just one cornetto, GIVE IT TO ME! The tasty of ice cream from italieeeeeee
Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My! 1 year ago
We approve of a final snack. In fact, why wait through nine lives? Bring on the snacks!
Tim Fountain 1 year ago (edited)
Anyone remember the UK advert, where the theme was "Just one cornetto, give it to me. Delicious Ice cream, from Italy. La la, lalala". He was remembering that!!! Here it is - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNWYhbHUcWM
RELATED:
#2
A few stay with me. (Paramedic for context.)
“I think I’m going to die.”
It’s happened on more than one occasion where a patient directly tells me they are going to die and seconds later go into cardiac arrest. It’s so common that ‘a sense of impending doom’ is a legitimate symptom.
“Don’t let me die”
He arrested as we arrived at the hospital. They didn’t get pulses back. Stable on scene but declined rapidly during transport. That family had no way to know that was the last time they’d see him alive.
Me: “I’ll see you again!”
Her, smiling: “No you won’t.”
Hospice patient I had transported many times before. First name basis. We always said we would see each other again after I dropped her off. That time she replied with a simple “no you won’t”. It was the last time I ever saw her. Some people just know.
That’s what is so sacred about the medical field, really. We have this image of giving our last words to friends or family. However for many of us our last words will be delivered to the ears of a complete stranger. In those last moments I’ll be whatever you need me to be. Your child, your spouse, your friend. Whatever you say will be heard, and carried with me to the end.
Donald 1 year ago
"In those last moments I'll be whatever you need me to be." Holy s**t that's powerful, the ideal person to work in the medical field.
Tessana Nemenski 1 year ago
This needs to be #1 on this list just for the last line. I have met a few people like this in the medical industry and they are unicorns that need to be protected at all costs
Cheesepony 1 year ago
Thank you for this: " for many of us our last words will be delivered to the ears of a complete stranger" - and there you are Stranger - and you're kind, and helpful, and honest. What a gift at the end !
Nicole Weymann 1 year ago (edited)
Heart stopped beating. "Cardiac" is always something about "heart" ("cordial" comes from there, too, I think) and "arrest" means "no move" (similar as the police arresting people). A heart attack.
Load More Replies...
Cindi Antrobus 1 year ago
You're right impending doom is so real I have heard and seen it happen
#3
I was in the Army, and one of my fellow soldiers was able to call their parents on a sat phone during their death. Their last words were apologies for causing so much trouble as a teen and how they wished they could be back home to fix everything. The parents were in shock, and I had to take the phone to let them know their child was gone.
I relive this scene on repeat in my nightmares.
Bill Hankel 1 year ago
Please take comfort knowing you were there for him (and his parents), despite the horrendous circumstances ... war is truly h*ll.
MalibuClassicMan 1 year ago
Sad you had to live thru that, thanks for being there with your "brother in arms" and thanks for your service to this country also!!
Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 1 year ago
Wonder if they felt a sense of relief knowing they'd managed to tell their family goodbye
Spencer's slave no longer 1 year ago (edited)
OP doesn't mention the American military at all in this post. I've been with, and known, more than one that lost a loved one in military circumstances. I came closer than I ever wanted to be, twice, on UK soil. I didn't "serve", I married a soldier. The USA aren't the only ones in combat zones. My heart goes out to all combat families who lost loved ones, wherever they come from, or however they passed. We are, and always will be, united by who we lost.
Load More Replies...
Among the various responses, some stories stand out for their unsettling nature, while others are more emotional and touching. One hospice worker recounted a patient who, moments before passing, kept saying “Not until they’re all here! Not until they’re all here”, hoping to be reunited with her estranged son before her passing.
Another healthcare worker shared a chilling experience when an elderly woman with dementia kept screaming “I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe, HELP ME, HELP ME”, leaving this nurse unsettled and feeling like she had failed at her job. Such experiences often leave medical professionals struggling with the mysteries of life and death, highlighting the profound and sometimes disturbing realities they face in their line of work.
#4
Not a scary moment, but a beautiful one:
I held the hand of my best friend who had metastasized breast cancer. When I kissed her cheek goodbye she had tears in her eyes and wouldn’t let go of my hand. I said “I’ll see you tomorrow, don’t be sad!” And while still clenching my hand she said through her tears “I love you, don’t you ever forget it.” She closed her eyes right then and there and passed away after her 9 year battle with cancer.
#5
When I was 11 years old, going to school friends birthday party, saw a motorcycle rider wrap himself around a telephone pole. My dad, a Vietnam vet (3x tours), got out of our Surburban, held his hand. Prayed. Then told the man he would die. Not to be afraid. Think of his loved ones. Remember how strong they know he is. To die knowing he is loved. He is on his way to his next journey. He had a well fulfilled life of love and happiness.... my dad never met the rider. The rider believed every word. His last words were bubbles...
Tamra 1 year ago
I can't imagine what this man experienced in three freaking tours of Vietnam, but he apparently came out of it with a good deal of empathy intact. He gave the dying man a gift.
ZombieMommy 1 year ago
I feel like being honest and letting them know the time is coming is better than letting them die panicking and terrified or a sense of false hope.
Patricia Smith 1 year ago
What a beautiful man. I hope someone like that is with me when I take my last breaths.
Babs Ishkabibble 1 year ago
That's a beautiful story but next time you tell it, leave out the part about the rider believing every word. It might be true but we can't know what the rider believed and it's unnecessary embellishment.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago (edited)
OP's dad knew that the motorcyclist would die, as OP's dad was in the Vietnam War and was probably familiar with what fatal wounds looked like. OP's dad held the stranger's hand and told him comforting things as the stranger died. OP's dad was able to give the motorcyclist some comfort in his last moments, which is wonderful.
Load More Replies... LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago
You have no idea when this occurred. Assuming OP is around my age (my dad was a Vietnam vet as well, like OP's), then there were no cellphones when I was 11. No one had cellphones. THEY DID NOT EXIST YET. So, assume that there were no cellphones when this happened. It may also have been in an isolated or rural area with no time for OP's dad to drive to someone's house to use a landline. Also, check your presumptuousness at the door, please - someone who had gone through THREE tours in 'Nam would well know what fatal injuries looked like. OP's father gave the man comfort in his last moments rather than let him die alone.
Load More Replies...
#6
My dad had colon cancer. He said to me he didn’t want to go to sleep because he knew he wouldn’t wake up. He did die in his sleep that night.
lisa m 1 year ago
My dad passed in hospice this past November of stage 4 prostate cancer. He was so scared to die he asked to be sedated (just a d**g induced sleep almost like a coma) we were told he may live another week possibly under sedation. We all said heartwrenching goodbyes and he was given the IV pump ....he didn't last 7 hours, he knew
MalibuClassicMan 1 year ago
almost identical to how my dad passed away in 2013, I miss him so much, and I am now 65 YO.
According to an article on end-of-life rally, when a dying loved one experiences a sudden revival of energy or awareness, it can be a deeply confusing and emotional time for their family. This phenomenon, known as terminal lucidity, often gives families a fleeting sense of hope that their loved one is improving. However, it is typically a sign that the person is consciously preparing for their final journey. “Sadly, rallying is usually a hallmark pre-death sign. I have known many family caregivers, hospice aides, nurses and doctors who have seen their patients show 'improvement' before death. Some patients want to talk, while some become restless and act as if they need to start preparing for a trip,” the article relates.
Knowing about terminal lucidity can help families brace for the complex emotions that accompany these moments. It offers one last chance for meaningful connection, though it can also lead to feelings of guilt and confusion when the inevitable end comes. Understanding this can help families cherish the time left, knowing it is a natural part of the dying process.
#7
I have done hospice work, home health care, and worked in a nursing home. The best one was in a nursing home with an elderly man. We knew it was coming soon, but he has no family, so we were taking turns just being with him. He opened his eyes and smiled and said, “It’s such a lovey day. Don’t let this spoil it.” It really was a perfect Spring day; he passed about five minutes later.
The saddest was a lady in hospice care. She kept saying, “Not until they’re all here! Not until they’re all here!” The family finally admitted she had a son that she had disowned many years prior. They tried to locate him, but weren’t successful. She died crying for her boy.
Tamra 1 year ago
That second one is truly sad, and I have a feeling too many parents will go like that. Love your children as much as you can, because that's one thing you'll never regret doing.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago (edited)
My sister tells me constantly that I'll "regret" not spending more time with my mother. My sister is our mom's biological child and is the "golden child". I'm adopted and I was abused extensively (physically and mentally/emotionally) by our mother. My sister was never so much as spanked. I would like to think I'd be the "bigger man" (so to speak) if my mom was dying and go to her deathbed, but I'm not sure I could do so. Both my mother and sister bailed on my dad as he was dying, and I stayed alone to hold his hand as he passed. I haven't forgiven either one of them for that, either. I'd really like to be the bigger person when my mom is dying, but I'm not sure I could be.
Load More Replies...
Huddo's sister 1 year ago
The first one reminds me of when my older brother died. We had a lovely day with him in the palliative care unit, sing and telling stories, then he was taken off the life support. We went outside to let off balloons (didn't know how bad that was at the time) and the sun was shining and we knew he wouldn't want his death to spoil the day. When I think about this, I always remember the lyrics from the song 'I thought that t w.ould rain, on the day you went away'
#8
“Did you turn off the lights?”
Me: “no, the lights are still on.”
“That’s not funny. It’s really not fu-oh.”
I spent over 30 days in and out of the hospital in 2018 for a medical issue I had. Most of the time I had to share a room. In one room, I was with this guy in his late 50s there for some kind of serious pneumonia with complications. He was morbidly obese and had diabetes and some other health issues. We were sitting there watching jeopardy, when he said the above. As soon as he said “oh” he kinda started having trouble breathing, some gasping, a bunch of alarms went off and then out of nowhere half a dozen doctors and nurses and such were in the room. Somebody wheeled my bed out to another room. I found out later he’d died of a massive heart attack. I don’t know why he thought everything went black first. The doctor didn’t know either though she had some ideas. The head nurse, this tiny Filipina lady, said “he was dying. You don’t die all at once. Some parts die first.”
I think about that a lot. I don’t know if she’s right or not or if she meant it to be deeper than that, probably not. But “you don’t die all at once” sticks with me now.
Undercover 1 year ago
Afaik the hearing is the last sense a dying person loses. Source: a hospice worker during a training session.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago
I do hope that is true. I was with my dad as he died. I was the only family member who stayed (my boyfriend stayed too.) My boyfriend played oldies music on his laptop for my dad to listen to as we each held one of his hands. I told my dad over and over that I loved him and that it was okay for him to go and finally be at peace (he had had a catastrophic accident 21 years prior and had been bedridden since.) I do hope he heard some of the music and heard me tell him I loved him as he went.
Load More Replies...
Sunny Day 1 year ago
During the French Revolution, a doctor(? might just have been a weirdo) studied the heads when they came off at the guillotine. The eyes and lips on some would move for 20-30 seconds before the brain died from lack of oxygen. Or I guess they "lost consciousness" and then died soon afterwards. (I assume the ones that did not move were already unconscious from shock)
ArodTheHorrible 1 year ago
That's a rather profound thought. It can be as deep as you want it to be, I suppose
#9
Dying man to his daughter, "Honey I'm sorry but I have to go.".
Nicola Mawson 1 year ago
My last words to my mom: take two Panado and go back to sleep. She was comatose when I got home from school and DoA at the hospital. Note, Panado is paracetamol in South Africa
Dianellian 1 year ago
My dad (interstate) rang me to say ‘I guess I’ll see you when I see you’. He died 3 days later of covid complications.
In addition to the touching declarations and chilling words, some patients express their fear and regret in their final moments. One doctor described a patient who, right before he passed away, said "I think I did something really stupid” without ever clarifying what "something" was, leaving both the medical staff and the patient's family in a state of anxious speculation. Another story involved a patient who broke his family’s hearts by saying “I thought I had more time”, leaving us all contemplating our own lives and how we choose to spend the little time we have here. These moments underscore the emotional and psychological weight carried by those working in healthcare, as they not only provide medical care but also bear witness to the deepest fears and confessions of their patients.
#10
My grandpa’s brother’s last words were “I’m at the gate but they won’t let me in yet”. He was deeply religious, so I hope seeing those gates brought him peace.
Nicole Weymann 1 year ago
I think it was actually meant to give comfort, as in "instead of going to heII just 'pay' for your sins with pain, repent, and go up" (alternatively pay cash. i.e. donate money to the church)
Load More Replies...
#11
“Help me, I have four kids. Help me. Don’t let me die. Please don’t let me die.”
Edit: this was a Covid patient during the beginning of Covid before we intubated her.
Philly Bob Squires 1 year ago
I'll get downvoted but HEY!!! Vax is wrong! Maybe clorox!! I am so sorry for her loss... F**K TRUMP and his denial!!
Craig Staley 1 year ago
Since this is a list of "last words," she didn't make it.
Load More Replies... #12
I have worked in the medical field for almost 20 years but the one with most impact was from my grandma. She told me my grandpa was waiting for her, she wanted to be him but most of all she was tired of seeing me so tired and not having a life anymore (for context, I had to quit working and put my life on hold for over 2 years to take of her full time). So she asked for a DNR. I signed and she became unconscious shortly and subsequently passed.
Howl's sleeping castle 1 year ago
Me and my husband quit our jobs to take care of my MIL when she was diagnosed with 4th stage cancer and was bedridden. It happened within a month of our wedding. After a year of suffering she died. Everyone told me the same thing that I am blessed and it's good karma and God will give me a good life. But I feel I am a fake. That I did all that to show that I am a good person. (And get brownie points for good karma)
Kel_how 1 year ago
Whether or not you get "points" for it, you still sacrificed and took care of her. Don't worry what others think.
Load More Replies...
ZombieMommy 1 year ago
My Grandma had leukemia. She beat it once but it came back with a vengeance. You could just tell she was miserable. She wasn't conscious at that point but would make horrible noises like she was in pain. It was truly horrible. I said my goodbyes and told her she could go, we would all be okay. She passed that night. My Grandfather passed a year after.
According to experts, the most common regret dying people have is not having the courage to be true to themselves and live the life they actually desire, but instead living the life that someone else expected from them.
If we regret not being more present in our kids’ lives, we will likely carry that same regret for many years. If we regret choosing the comfort of our current jobs over pursuing our dreams, we’ll probably have a similar regret in the future. The key difference between now and then is that today, we have the power to change things, create the future we desire, so we don’t end up regretting our lives. We can start fresh today by asking ourselves: what do I regret right now?
#13
One patient of my mom's was an elderly man at the ER who was cursing out his wife with the final gasps of breath he could muster. His words were incoherent but you could feel they were full of anger.
We later found out he was poisoned, and the wife was likely the culprit due to an insurance fraud case.
Katie Lutesinger 1 year ago
If anyone gets slapped with a very angry ghost following them for the rest of their lives, it's this sick, greedy POS.
Brian Droste 1 year ago
Yeah, if you are going to poison someone, especially a loved one, it is going to be found out. Doctors, hospitals or whoever have tests that can detect nearly every type of chemicals in your body.
#14
I was with my father in law when he passed. No words, just long gasping breaths like a fish out of water.
He kept trying to pull the sensor leads off of himself and leave, but he just didn’t have the energy.
He was 6’ 4” and 300 lbs of kind hearted grumpiness until the last year of his life when he must’ve weighed around 220. Cancer ate him from the inside out, slowly, painfully and relentlessly.
Greg, you tough son of a b***h, I miss you every day.
Howl's sleeping castle 1 year ago (edited)
My MIL died of cancer. She was gasping for air. It had happened before so we opened the curtains and increased the speed of the fan. (This had helped before). I asked her if she is in pain. She wasn't. Suddenly she said my husband's name twice (he was sitting, holding her hand) and stopped responding. We tried CPR but by the time the ambulance came her body was already little cold.
Forrest McCanless 1 year ago
I just don't understand the idea of living with cancer - if I'm diagnosed, I'm leaving right then - screw a long drawn-out nightmare for all.
#15
*I want to tell everyone everything but I can't*
Panicked, pumped full of morphine.
Not sinister, just too much left unsaid.
These accounts from the AskReddit thread offer a glimpse into the often unseen side of the medical profession. The stories shared by these healthcare workers and the families of dying patients not only evoke a sense of fear and curiosity but also remind us of the profound humanity and vulnerability present in the final moments of life. As you read through these selected comments, prepare to be moved by the emotional last words of patients on the brink of death.
Which of these stories was the most touching to you? Would you like to share a moment you've experienced with us? Please do so in the comments.
#16
Elderly women was on the phone with her husband deciding on what her code status (whether or not to CPR) should be. She went into cardiac arrest mid sentence. We didn’t notice the phone when doing CPR until after she was pronounced dead. Husband listened to the entire thing.
Clown fish 1 year ago (edited)
I hope the husband got a lot of counseling and help. Listening to that isn't good
Robin Roper 1 year ago
CPR on an elderly person is cruel and useless. There is a next to zero chance of survival and every bone in the person's chest is broken.
Brian Droste 1 year ago
He could have hang up himself if he wanted to. Maybe he wanted to hear what was going on.
#17
“I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe, HELP ME, HELP ME”
This elderly women with dementia was air hungry but DNR/DNI & on comfort measures so we couldn’t do anything to “help” and the comfort measure supplemental oxygen we had her on wasn’t enough to sustain her & no matter how much pain medications (IV morphine) we gave she still screamed out in agony until her final breath…
It still f***s me up sometimes when i remember her.. it was just awful. i felt like I failed as a nurse that day knowing she passed with so much fear and discomfort :’(.
OldAuntiePanda 1 year ago
I know how that feels. An older man telling 4 of us to not leave him,to keep fanning him.We had 2 fans blowing, giving Morphine ever hour a had made paper fans. We stayed with him until 3 am. It has been 40 years and I can still hear him.
Forrest McCanless 1 year ago
I just don't understand the idea of living with cancer - if I'm diagnosed, I'm leaving right then - screw a long drawn-out nightmare for all.
rorschach-penguin 1 year ago
I'm with you. Bring me somewhere physician-assisted euthanasia is legal and let me go.
Load More Replies...
#18
I work as a paramedic. I had a single motorcycle crash into an electric box by a stop light. He smashed it and ended up into the wood line in a forest preserve. He was injured but not that badly. We ran it as a traumatic accident and transported to a nearby trauma center. He was awake and talking en route. As we pulled into the hospital he grabbed my hand and said “I see the light I’m dying right now.” I tried to re assure him but by the time he got into the ER he had died. The ER doc screamed at us for not having him intubated and so on. I told the doctor what happened and he immediately apologized.
ShellsBells 1 year ago (edited)
This is one of the many reasons I became an EMT before thinking about going to nursing school. Understanding prehospital care would help a nurse/doctor have some sort of awareness of what can/could happen on your way to the hospital. Edit:spelling.
Cerridwn d'Wyse 1 year ago
That really related to the topic but the same is true about post hospital care. I think pre-care is understood by staff much more than what happens when they discharge that patient home
Load More Replies... #19
Wasn’t his last word, because technically he couldn’t speak. But couple days before he passed, my dad was in the hospital on a ventilator, and he wasn’t getting better. We gave him his options, which neither were good, pretty much long term care on a ventilator, or hospice, and he wrote “I thought I had more time”. That broke me.
Susie Elle 1 year ago
That's what my mom said after hearing she had cancer and was already terminal. It was heartbreaking.
Papa 1 year ago
I wish I knew what my father's last words were, but I don't. He was in the hospital, and we knew he likely wouldn't come home, but didn't realize his death was imminent. One day he just went to sleep, and hours later his breathing started slowing down, and finally stopped. Now that I think about it, they were probably something ordinary like "Please scratch my back" (he had a recurring problem with dry skin while he was in the hospital).
Huddo's sister 1 year ago
My older brother was also non-verbal and intubated before he died. He had a few weeks in hospital, deciding whether to keep going or turn off ventilator. He/we decided his quality of life wouldn't be great if he stayed on the ventilator. He was already sleeping for long periods of time as it was such hard work on his body to try and keep living. He knew what was coming and died peacefully when we took him off the ventilator.
Lyone Fein 1 year ago (edited)
Most of us go around with this assumption. It really means that we haven't confronted the reality of our own mortality. Pretty sure it's just an abstract idea for me.
#20
I volunteer with hospice and my patient had fallen and was not doing well. She wasn’t really fully awake and aware while I was there. When I went to leave she looked me in the eyes and was so “there” (not sure of a better word) and said I love you to me for the first and last time. She was just so sweet and I still miss her.
Disgruntled Pelican 1 year ago
Bless you for volunteering with hospice. My uncle was on hospice for a short period of time to give my parents a break and even at 8, I knew that those people were incredible on different level.
#21
Something light hearted to share. I work in retail pharmacy and called one of our regular patients to tell him his meds (monthly pick up) are ready for pick up. He managed to answer his cellphone and told me he’s dying and currently at a hospice then he thanked me for always preparing his meds for him. I said you’re welcome and hang up on phone. A few weeks later… he showed up at our pharmacy to pick up. I had to ask my coworkers if they are also seeing what I’m seeing. Hahaha! That was 5 years ago. Wonder if he’s still alive….
#22
Had a guy one time tell me “in about an hour and a half I’m gonna quit” proceeded to code multiple times…. Ended up pronouncing him at about an hour and a half later. I think those who are alert and are going to die know it’s coming.
Robin Roper 1 year ago
On a Friday night, after a full day of doctor appointments, my FIL who had been dealing with a series of health problems told my husband "I don't want to do this anymore. It's not fun." My husband told his dad that he didn't have to do anything he didn't want to do; it was his decision. My FIL passed 4 days later. I always knew he'd go on his own terms - he landed on Omaha Beach in the first wave of soldiers (29th Division, 116th, G Company), participated in the Incheon Invasion, and was a sniper in Vietnam before the US was officially there; he was something!
#23
I work in palliative care, so have seen a lot of deaths - most of them have been very peaceful, people are not usually conscious for the last few days - like they're asleep all the time. One that sticks out for me is a man getting the last rites, and just as the priest finished, there was an almighty boom and thunderclap and all of the lights in the hospice went out for a few seconds. The patient died minutes later.
Huddo's sister 1 year ago
I think there was thunder around the time of one of my brother's deaths- afterwards my family often said 'he must be having a party up there' whenever we heard it
#24
Not a healthcare worker but I was at work and a guy had a heart attack. He fell over and was having some spasms and he said" I am going to die at work " he was gone before the ambulance got there and he passed on the shop floor with a wrench in his hand.
#25
This isn't really "scary" in the way you're asking, but when I was an intern (20+ years ago now), I was discharging a patient I had a connection with from the hospital to hospice with terminal cancer. This dude had nobody in his life. I told him I'd come visit him, and his last words to me were "no you won't." But I actually did, maybe 3 weeks later. I went to the hospice house, and he had already passed away. I was wrecked. But it made me realize how fast things can change, and the impact of my last words to this dying man scared me and stuck with me.
MalibuClassicMan 1 year ago
My mom actually lasted 7 weeks in Hospice, doctor even told us he couldn't believe she held out that long, it is awful to have to wait that long on a loved one to pass, but the people there were so great to us.
Load More Replies... Cheesepony 1 year ago
Wow! thank you for sharing that lesson - and thank you for being part of his life
#26
My wife, about 10 hours before she died of stomach cancer that had metastasized to her lungs and was suffocating her.
"No more!"
They put her on benzos after that and she spent the last hours unconscious.
Forrest McCanless 1 year ago
I just don't understand the idea of living with cancer - if I'm diagnosed, I'm leaving right then - screw a long drawn-out nightmare for all.
#27
I worked in a seniors care home for many years and tended to both my parents as they were dying.
Most of the elderly would mumble stuff that I couldn't make out but one woman in particular said something like "How are you here?" (While looking at the corner of the room) a couple of hours before death. Another one told a care aide that her husband was waiting (care aide told me this just as I entered the room so I didn't hear that one first hand).
My dad didn't say anything but the smile on his face was the biggest I had seen in the years prior to his death. He named the infant baby/stillborn that he & my mom had. A brother that I didn't get the chance to grow up with.
My mom said "thank you" to me right before she died. My sister & I took her to all appointments and kept her in her home while on her death bed. She was so scared we'd put her in hospice but we wanted to respect her wishes. Hard, but worth it in my opinion.
I'm on my phone so formatting and spelling likely suck.
Charlotte Sandoval 1 year ago
My grandmother, Jeanne, had a best friend, Gertrude. When they were teenagers they promised each other that whoever died first would come welcome the other into heaven. My grandmother died first, quite young. Decades later, my dad gets a call that Gertrude has also passed. She had been in a coma for a few weeks. Just before she died, she sat up with an absolute beaming smile and held out her arms, calling, "Jeanne! Jeanne!" And then passed, still smiling.
#28
My dad's last word was an answer to a question.
"Hospice."
He suffered a spinal stroke that paralyzed him from the neck down and he could not breathe on his own, so he was on a ventilator for two months. We were told he wasn't recovering like he should be and the term of care at the place he was at was coming to an end. We either needed to transfer him to a long term care facility, or go with hospice care. I wasn't comfortable making the decision without his input, so we got him alert enough and got a device attached to his trach tube to let him speak a little. I explained the situation and asked what he wanted to do. That one word is all he even tried to say. He was just done with it all.
I'm thankful to the nurse who helped us and him get through it all, but it's kind of scary how easily a s****y situation can just destroy someone's will to live.
Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My! 1 year ago
My dad was on hospice. It gave my mom a well-needed break, and professionals she could talk to (she had been a geriatric nurse). They did the physical care Mom just wasn't able to do anymore, and made Dad as comfortable as possible.
Lyone Fein 1 year ago
I am not sure that we should assume that accepting death means that your will to live has been destroyed.
Kel_how 1 year ago
Hospice is such a a wonderful service. Both of my maternal grandparents received hospice care and it was extremely comforting for everyone involved. We did have one or two bad hospice nurses along the way, but the majority were excellent. One even took my family to lunch after my grandmother passed away.
#29
Its quite common, It would have to be elderly dying patients crying out and asking for their mama. .
TheForrestGreene (he/they/it) 1 year ago
something like this happened to my great grandmother, where she would be crying out for her parents, or for her husband, or her daughter. all of them were dead already. it was really sad
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago
How tragic her daughter passed before she did. That must have been agonizing for your GG during her life, let alone as she was dying :(
Load More Replies...
Katie Lutesinger 1 year ago
I literally started crying the moment I read this. Oh god. Now I'm imagining my mother doing this on her deathbed one day and it got ten times worse because her mother died 38 years ago and and... oh Mum... *sobs*
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago (edited)
If this does happen, reassure her that her mom is on her way to visit - in fact, her mom is on her way right this second! If your mom isn't in her right mind as she is passing, she won't know any better, and you telling her that will comfort her.
Load More Replies...
Wysteria_Rose 1 year ago
My granny (mid-80s, dementia case) talks frequently about her parents visiting. Each time I wonder if it's a realistic memory resurfacing to give her some comfort or if they're visiting to take her with them soon.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago
Were I you, I would assure her that they are coming to visit soon - in fact, they are on their way "right now" - your granny likely wouldn't know any better or "notice" that they never arrive :(
Load More Replies...
OneHappyPuppy 1 year ago
My great aunt with demetia, long before she passed and little before she became catatonic kept asking for her mother, sister (both long deceased), me (for some unknown reason, I live abroad) and my BIL. She also had a father and two brothers, all long deceased but never asked to see them. Mostly asked for her sister
#30
Maybe the scariest thing is that a lot of people don’t get a dignified “last word” like most of the time it’s traumatic and they don’t even get to speak before it happens.
#31
My dad had to temporarily go into a care facility, while I was visiting he got a new roommate. The man was crying that he was going to die, the workere tried to assure him he wouldn’t. One told him his daughter was on her way. He cried “I’ll be dead before then!” I went home. Dad told me the man did die that night, and before his daughter got there.
#32
Not scary but heartwarming yet sad. I was this gentlemen's nurse for 2 days. He was having breathing issues d/t chronic lung problems. On my 3rd day with him he's breathing harder but still okay. He talks with the doctor and decided he wants to go DNR, after the doctor leaves im helping him with his oxymask and he looks at me and says "I'm really glade your my nurse today." His brother comes in and I leave the room so they can talk. Not even 10mins later the brother comes out of the room and says "I think he stopped breathing." I go inside and sure enough the gentlemen passed away peacefully. This happened 2 years ago and still to this day the one patient I remember the most.
#33
My mum told my sister to take her hands off her before they increase the morphine. She was trying to get out of bed to go home - she was fed up with the hospital. It was the final burst of energy before death, and we had to hold her gently to explain to her she couldn’t go. I hope my sister was so sleep deprived she forgot those words, and I hope she remembers she helped soothed my mum in her final moments by playing recordings she has of our grandmother singing Polish hymns.
Huddo's sister 1 year ago
My grandad kept trying to get up from bed to go to the bathroom before he died. He had had falls and trouble walking, so wasn't able to get up. His bed was on the floor with an alarm mat beside it because he kept trying. He was catheterised so didn't need to go to the toilet anyway, and had only been having liquids for a few days. He was pretty delirious. It was pretty troubling compared to the other deaths I witnessed before that, which were all peaceful.
Lyone Fein 1 year ago
I think most of us would rather die at home. So I wonder why our families so often have us brought into these noisy, cold, uncomfortable hospital environments where everyone is panicking. It isn't conducive to a peaceful death.
#34
I spoke with the medic who worked on my son. He said The last thing Sage said was "I think I did something really stupid." Then he went to sleep and never woke back up.
CF 1 year ago
From Reddit: He and his friends had completed a grueling hike, they decided to party to celebrate. Before the party started they were doing donuts in an empty lot. Sage decided to hang out of the window, and the jeep rolled. No one else was injured, no alcohol or d***s were involved. It was just a dumb mistake.
#35
Paramedic here. Went on a lift assist last year. Tried forever to get this woman up off of her bathroom floor. She was a very large woman, so we had to call the fire department for help. She had been weak for the past couple of days so I convinced her to go to the hospital for evaluation. While wheeling her out to the ambulance, she told her son “I’ll call you when I get there.” From loading her into the ambulance to when I climbed in, she went into pulseless V-tach and died. It was so surreal.
#36
My dad just passed last Tuesday in hospice. He had dementia and was sleeping all the time at home. I went in and all of sudden he kinda sat up and his eyes were wide open. He hadn't opened his eyes for days. He sat up and stared at me. I was panicking. He tried to gasp for air 2x then fell back. Eyes shut. I knew he was gone. But witnessing him trying to get air was absolutely horrible. I just hope he was not aware of what was going on.
#37
My grandpa’s last words, as he was being settled into a nursing home bed for rehabilitative care: “I’m so damn uncomfortable.”
He passed not five minutes later. I’ve often wondered if he’d have lived a little longer had we brought him home, instead.
Jorie 1 year ago
Many years ago, I cared for my parents who had terminal cancer at the same time. Non-stop decisions were a way of life. Second guessing myself became second nature. Then I realized that I had made the best decisions I could, given the facts I had at any given time. Think about it. I wish you peace.
What do you think ?
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago
The last time I visited my nana before she died, she just hugged me, said “let me get a good look at you,” and smiled. About a week later, I got the little wooden bird I’d given her back.
Tamra 1 year ago
I'm sure you were a great source of pride and joy for her, and she had the gift of your presence and love when it mattered.
Load More Replies... Shine Chisholm (they/ them) 1 year ago
My grandfather's last words were to tell me to keep practicing the fiddle. He was a professional bluegrass musician, and he was living with my family up until he went. I feel terrible, often, that I didn't keep up with practicing.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago
I wish I'd gotten to hear my dad's voice one last time before he died. I was at his bedside and holding his hand as he passed. But he'd had an accident 21 years before and had sustained catastrophic brain damage. He had been bedridden, with a feeding tube, diapers, the whole nine yards, for 21 years. I hadn't heard him speak since I was 18, when his accident happened. I'd just gotten dumped by my first boyfriend a few days before my dad's accident, so I was being a moody teenager and I don't even remember what we talked about on the day before his accident :(
Ovata Acronicta 1 year ago
(I'm at #17, as a reminder to myself when I come back in here.) Had to take a break from the list and go get Grandma's clothes part1 out of the dryer. List reminded a lot of taking care of her during her end-of-life stage. It hurts a lot, it'll be a year next month. When pulling out her clothes yesterday to start washing them, find what's suitable to either put up in a garage sale or donate, I found a little voice recorder and some tapes. Batteries looked good. Could be anything on there, really, and it's a questionable choice to hit play but I did anyway. She said "Testing 123, testing 123" and the entire truck of grief came right through the window and destroyed me. That was her voice, something I haven't heard for almost a year. Later Dad said not to listen to it since there might be other things on there. And, yeah, I'm not sure what's on it. Could theorize. I also, weirdly, found tax info with my name on it from 1998, when I was 7. Wonder what that's about.
Ovata Acronicta 1 year ago
Finished folding part1. Finished the list. May or may not head to the reddit post this pulled from. As far as last words, Grandma didn't really have any. Her sister showed up a week before she died, and Grandma was more mentally present and conversational than she had been in a long time. Would be the last day she'd communicate. Hospice sent us a bed that next day and we moved her into it, but almost all physical contact was so utterly painful for her and she would cry out. Honestly we opted to not change her and left it for when the nurses would come - she wasn't voiding much at this point anyway, but it came down to not wanting to be the ones to hurt her. She was very peaceful the day the shower aide came, aside from shifting her, the contact of us washing her did not seem to hurt her. Shower aide asked me to message her when it was time, but she knew it was the last time she'd be here. Grandma passed that night. I really hope she was at peace and we finally got ahead of her pain.
Load More Replies...
Mad McQueen 1 year ago
I overdosed once as a teen on sleeping pills. I remember taking them then for some reason I went downstairs to sit on the couch. My sister and brother were there an it was before dinner. I know I dozed out. And then there was nothing. No sound or light or weight or even thinking. Then I had a thought. I hadn't thought anything in a while. And I woke up. My sister said she tried to wake me but couldn't and thought I was faking and stuck a pin in my leg and I didn't move. My brother shook me. But they still thought I was faking. They called my mom from the kitchen in and she thought I was faking. So she left the room. When I woke up it was 3 hours since I had sat there. Basically dead on the couch. They ate dinner thinking I was sleeping and faking sleep for some reason. It was hard to move after that. I still wish I could go back. It was like inside of nothing. Peaceful.
UpQuarkDownQuark (he/him) 1 year ago
Not last words, but I fondly remember a woman who passed about 25 years ago. She lived in a small, nice nursing home, and I delivered oxygen once a week. I never saw her awake; she just slept peacefully as I rolled two tanks into her closet. Then one time I walked in, and she opened her eyes and gave me the loveliest, warmest smile. Then she closed her eyes and went back to sleep. I called next week to confirm the delivery, and they said she had passed a few days prior. I had a tiny shared moment with a stranger that I’ll cherish until I close my eyes for the last time.
Lyone Fein 1 year ago
I found most of these uplifting, not heartbreaking at all. Congratulations to the article writer! This is an exceptional story.
Lorius Interruptus 1 year ago
My husband (48yo) told me he was going to go take a nap and asked if he could get an extra hug and kiss before he laid down. I told him there was no such thing as extra and he could have all the hugs and kisses that he wants. He died in his sleep during that nap.
General Stukov 1 year ago
While not a human he was a faimily member. Our dog Hurley collapsed one morning and our neighbor helped rush him to the vet, the vet said they couldn't find anything wrong with him but when i had to leave around 6pm for work i went in there and helped put him on the bed, he was just so weak and i knew. I gave him a kiss of the forehead and said, "you are the bestest boy ever" and he gave me one tail wag and went back to shaking. I was crying all the way to work and at about 3am after the ending of my break my mom called me to tell me he passed. He really is the bestest boy ever.
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago
The last time I visited my nana before she died, she just hugged me, said “let me get a good look at you,” and smiled. About a week later, I got the little wooden bird I’d given her back.
Tamra 1 year ago
I'm sure you were a great source of pride and joy for her, and she had the gift of your presence and love when it mattered.
Load More Replies... Shine Chisholm (they/ them) 1 year ago
My grandfather's last words were to tell me to keep practicing the fiddle. He was a professional bluegrass musician, and he was living with my family up until he went. I feel terrible, often, that I didn't keep up with practicing.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 year ago
I wish I'd gotten to hear my dad's voice one last time before he died. I was at his bedside and holding his hand as he passed. But he'd had an accident 21 years before and had sustained catastrophic brain damage. He had been bedridden, with a feeding tube, diapers, the whole nine yards, for 21 years. I hadn't heard him speak since I was 18, when his accident happened. I'd just gotten dumped by my first boyfriend a few days before my dad's accident, so I was being a moody teenager and I don't even remember what we talked about on the day before his accident :(
Ovata Acronicta 1 year ago
(I'm at #17, as a reminder to myself when I come back in here.) Had to take a break from the list and go get Grandma's clothes part1 out of the dryer. List reminded a lot of taking care of her during her end-of-life stage. It hurts a lot, it'll be a year next month. When pulling out her clothes yesterday to start washing them, find what's suitable to either put up in a garage sale or donate, I found a little voice recorder and some tapes. Batteries looked good. Could be anything on there, really, and it's a questionable choice to hit play but I did anyway. She said "Testing 123, testing 123" and the entire truck of grief came right through the window and destroyed me. That was her voice, something I haven't heard for almost a year. Later Dad said not to listen to it since there might be other things on there. And, yeah, I'm not sure what's on it. Could theorize. I also, weirdly, found tax info with my name on it from 1998, when I was 7. Wonder what that's about.
Ovata Acronicta 1 year ago
Finished folding part1. Finished the list. May or may not head to the reddit post this pulled from. As far as last words, Grandma didn't really have any. Her sister showed up a week before she died, and Grandma was more mentally present and conversational than she had been in a long time. Would be the last day she'd communicate. Hospice sent us a bed that next day and we moved her into it, but almost all physical contact was so utterly painful for her and she would cry out. Honestly we opted to not change her and left it for when the nurses would come - she wasn't voiding much at this point anyway, but it came down to not wanting to be the ones to hurt her. She was very peaceful the day the shower aide came, aside from shifting her, the contact of us washing her did not seem to hurt her. Shower aide asked me to message her when it was time, but she knew it was the last time she'd be here. Grandma passed that night. I really hope she was at peace and we finally got ahead of her pain.
Load More Replies... Mad McQueen 1 year ago
I overdosed once as a teen on sleeping pills. I remember taking them then for some reason I went downstairs to sit on the couch. My sister and brother were there an it was before dinner. I know I dozed out. And then there was nothing. No sound or light or weight or even thinking. Then I had a thought. I hadn't thought anything in a while. And I woke up. My sister said she tried to wake me but couldn't and thought I was faking and stuck a pin in my leg and I didn't move. My brother shook me. But they still thought I was faking. They called my mom from the kitchen in and she thought I was faking. So she left the room. When I woke up it was 3 hours since I had sat there. Basically dead on the couch. They ate dinner thinking I was sleeping and faking sleep for some reason. It was hard to move after that. I still wish I could go back. It was like inside of nothing. Peaceful.
UpQuarkDownQuark (he/him) 1 year ago
Not last words, but I fondly remember a woman who passed about 25 years ago. She lived in a small, nice nursing home, and I delivered oxygen once a week. I never saw her awake; she just slept peacefully as I rolled two tanks into her closet. Then one time I walked in, and she opened her eyes and gave me the loveliest, warmest smile. Then she closed her eyes and went back to sleep. I called next week to confirm the delivery, and they said she had passed a few days prior. I had a tiny shared moment with a stranger that I’ll cherish until I close my eyes for the last time.
Lyone Fein 1 year ago
I found most of these uplifting, not heartbreaking at all. Congratulations to the article writer! This is an exceptional story.
Lorius Interruptus 1 year ago
My husband (48yo) told me he was going to go take a nap and asked if he could get an extra hug and kiss before he laid down. I told him there was no such thing as extra and he could have all the hugs and kisses that he wants. He died in his sleep during that nap.
General Stukov 1 year ago
While not a human he was a faimily member. Our dog Hurley collapsed one morning and our neighbor helped rush him to the vet, the vet said they couldn't find anything wrong with him but when i had to leave around 6pm for work i went in there and helped put him on the bed, he was just so weak and i knew. I gave him a kiss of the forehead and said, "you are the bestest boy ever" and he gave me one tail wag and went back to shaking. I was crying all the way to work and at about 3am after the ending of my break my mom called me to tell me he passed. He really is the bestest boy ever.
Related on Bored Panda
