A 34-year-old etiquette expert is one of the young representatives who are popularizing and modernizing the subject. His bite-size videos on TikTok and witty and approachable style of teaching manners help the young generation avoid feeling uncomfortable in situations where they don’t know if they’re doing the right thing.

Etiquette consultant Antoinette Akanji from the School of Etiquette tells Bored Panda that etiquette is as relevant as it’s ever been. “We would go as far as saying that it’s needed more in today’s society than ever. Our world is increasingly interconnected, and the way we interact with other people has a profound impact on both our personal and professional relationships,” explains Akanji. 

Meanwhile, Maryanne Parker, etiquette expert and founder of Manor of Manners, refers to this discipline as the sharpest of soft skills. "We use etiquette in our everyday lives, in any social or business situation. Etiquette is definitely a timeless practice that opens many doors. The purpose is to make everyone feel valued, respected, and at ease," she says.

The etiquette experts often notice that people narrow good manners down to just following arbitrary rules, but note that it’s a lot more than that. “Etiquette is about showing respect, consideration, and kindness to those around us. In today’s fast-paced and often impersonal digital age, good manners can help foster positive communication, reduce misunderstandings, and create a more pleasant and cooperative environment for everyone," says Akanji.

Knowing and having rules of etiquette as a guide helps people navigate social situations with confidence and grace, whether they’re in a professional setting, at a family gathering, or having a casual meet-up with friends.

We were also curious to know if experts think people in today’s society are generally well-mannered. Unfortunately, there’s still a lot of room for improvement. Akanji says, “It varies depending on the context and community. However, one can strongly argue that there are certain areas in society, where good manners are no longer being upheld nor valued, and decorum seems to definitely be on the decline.”

Parker agrees that there are things to work on concerning this subject. "Etiquette continues to be an obscured, unwanted topic for most. Otherwise, we will be learning etiquette in school. Back in the day, etiquette was reserved only for the aristocracy and wealthy families. It was about exclusion!

Today, we have so many etiquette schools and so much information about etiquette that we hardly have an excuse to be ill-mannered. However, good manners start at home and need to be reinforced on a daily basis," says Parker.

The biggest culprit of this is taking communication to the digital environment, where people in the anonymity of the internet can be rude and lack empathy. However, there’s still hope, as many people still value and practice good manners. 

“As etiquette consultants, we are seeing growing movement/ traction towards people wanting to promote kindness, inclusivity, and mindfulness, which only suggests a growing awareness of the importance of respectful interactions and etiquette in general,” Akanji tells us.

The experts from the School of Etiquette generally remain hopeful. “Overall, while there is much room for improvement, there remains a strong foundation of good manners in pockets of society. It’s our hope that this foundation will only encourage more people to get together and build on that foundation so that we see positive changes and long-lasting growth in society.”

Akanji kindly shared some additional key etiquette guidelines that everyone should know and practice, starting with basic politeness. “Simple words like "please," "thank you," and "excuse me" go a long way in everyday interactions,” she notes.

Respecting people’s personal space is also important. “Be mindful of personal boundaries and avoid invading other people’s personal space without permission,” says Akanji. And when someone is speaking to you, try to listen, avoid interrupting, and show that you value their input. 

Other recommendations include:

Respect others in digital communication. Avoid using all caps (which can be interpreted as shouting), respond promptly to messages, and refrain from oversharing personal information in public forums.

Punctuality: Being on time shows respect for others’ time and commitments.

Gratitude: Express appreciation for others’ efforts and kindness, whether through verbal acknowledgment or our personal favorite: a thank you note.

Dining Manners/Skills: Follow basic dining etiquette, such as chewing with your mouth closed, not speaking with a full mouth, and using utensils properly.

“In addition to traditional etiquette, it’s important to recognize the evolving nature of social norms and practices,” says Akanji. “Cultural sensitivity and inclusivity are paramount in today’s globalized society, and that’s why we at The School of Etiquette feel that understanding and respecting cultural differences can enhance our interactions and build stronger, more harmonious communities. 

By combining timeless principles of etiquette with an awareness of contemporary issues, we can navigate our social and professional lives with greater ease and empathy.”