Childless Couple Get Accused Of ‘Ruining’ A Family Vacation By Not Going, Find Out They Were Expected To Babysit
There is only so much vacation time you get in a year. It’s reasonable to want to spend it in the way that best suits your needs, whether it’s a week in the mountains or on the couch. However, in certain situations, especially when there’s family involved, you might have to adjust and meet in the middle. For instance, while trying to decide upon a destination.
A family vacation can be an enjoyable endeavor. But what if you don’t feel like it? As fun as spending time with your loved ones might be, it doesn’t necessarily mean that the activities they have in mind are as well.
A woman on Reddit shared her views on a similar situation with the r/AITA community. The user u/dionneandcher told fellow redditors about the trip her in-laws were planning, which was not her kind of thing whatsoever. Together with her husband, they usually spend their free time in the calm setting of the great outdoors, while the relatives wanted a Disney trip. No wonder it didn’t sound appealing. Things went even further downhill when the couple was accused of not liking the kids in the family and not caring for other members overall.
Image credits: RODNAE Productions (not the actual photo)
A redditor opened up about the not-so-appealing family vacation plan and the members’ reaction to her refusing to participate
Image credits: Craig Adderley (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Teona Swift (not the actual photo)
Image credits: u/dionneandcher
It’s not an easy task to plan the days off you worked so hard for. It becomes even more troublesome when there are a lot of people involved. In the case of u/dionneandcher, her views of a perfect vacation were way different from the ones of her in-laws. That is why she chose not to spend her money and free time on something she does not find appealing.
Paid time off (PTO) is one of the cornerstones of a healthy work-life balance. The well-deserved break is something people look forward to and plan in advance to get the most out of it. A survey carried out by AARP shows that vacation time results in not only a fun time but other benefits as well. These include better sleep, more energy, an increase in productivity, and better mental and overall health.
The number of paid days off varies depending on the company and the number of years a person has worked there. According to Zippia, a person in the US gets an average of 10 days of PTO per annum after working for the company for a year. The number of days rises to 15 after spending five years with the company, and after two decades, you are eligible to enjoy 20 days per year of paid leave. Some companies might cover bank holidays as well; however, that is not mandatory. Therefore, it’s completely understandable to use this time to do something dear to your heart.
In her Reddit post, the OP clearly states that spending time in a crowded theme park is not their cup of tea, to put it mildly. She and her husband are usually more drawn to the peace and quiet of nature rather than popular attractions bustling with people. Statista reveals that in 2021, the Walt Disney World Magic Kingdom in Florida was visited by nearly 12.7 million people.
As fun as it sounds to kids, adults might not find the kingdom to be so magical. Especially those without children. Despite not having offspring of their own, the OP and her husband were expected to join the trip, which implied looking after their nieces and nephews. After a polite refusal, the couple was denounced for not caring for them, which was not the case.
It is common for relatives to become involved in the childcare of their family members. Often referred to as family, friend, and neighbor child care, such cooperation can give parents a much-needed break. Research states that this is the most prevailing form of non-parental child care. As much as 33-59% of kids up to school age with employed parents are raised with the help of FFN caregivers.
However, it is only a legitimate option if the family member, friend, or neighbor signed up for it. In the case of the redditor and her husband, it was implied that the brother-in-law expected them to spend some time looking after his kids. The couple did not meet the expectations, which became the cause of an argument, and made the OP wonder—”am I the jerk here?”
Redditors engaged in a conversation with questions and suggestions for the OP
People in the thread had a lot to discuss and shared their views on similar situations
Some redditors suggested that everyone played an equal part in the unpleasant situation
The OP provided an update for the redditors to gain a better understanding of the situation
This may lead me to panda jail lol, but, your kids, your problem, you made them, you deal with them, i take every precaution not to have kids, i don't do well with kids.
⛓⛓🐼⛓⛓ 😄 Hey I spent a full ten minutes on this panda prison!!!
Load More Replies...It's telling that OP states how they regularly go to their family to see them, but family doesn't do it the other way round. And that's what happened with this vacation too, family was used to getting their way and OP accomodating them and reacted really badly when told no. I have the same situation. My family blames me for 'distancing' myself. But in reality all I did is just living my life and stop constantly hunting after them when I realized that they barely send me a text on my birthday but made absolutely no effort to keep more contact than that. I was never truly included because I dared to have different interests and they didn't bother to even try to connect to me , while I constantly tried to be part of what they do. Now that my parents are dead, I highly doubt I'll ever see my siblings again. But it's not my fault. And I won't grovel back
I think a lot of families fall into a pattern of well we all live close together so you furtherbout people just come to us because that's easier. And it is not ok.
Load More Replies...I cannot understand how someone can say that they are the A too. Other people made plan for them, and when they try to refuse, they literally tried to guilt them to go (both MIL and BIL), yet idiots in the coments are like “you didn’t answer correctly to someone trying to force you to do something “
I think it was just the way they said it, if they didn't say it was work to see family everyone would have said NTA I think
Load More Replies...This may lead me to panda jail lol, but, your kids, your problem, you made them, you deal with them, i take every precaution not to have kids, i don't do well with kids.
⛓⛓🐼⛓⛓ 😄 Hey I spent a full ten minutes on this panda prison!!!
Load More Replies...It's telling that OP states how they regularly go to their family to see them, but family doesn't do it the other way round. And that's what happened with this vacation too, family was used to getting their way and OP accomodating them and reacted really badly when told no. I have the same situation. My family blames me for 'distancing' myself. But in reality all I did is just living my life and stop constantly hunting after them when I realized that they barely send me a text on my birthday but made absolutely no effort to keep more contact than that. I was never truly included because I dared to have different interests and they didn't bother to even try to connect to me , while I constantly tried to be part of what they do. Now that my parents are dead, I highly doubt I'll ever see my siblings again. But it's not my fault. And I won't grovel back
I think a lot of families fall into a pattern of well we all live close together so you furtherbout people just come to us because that's easier. And it is not ok.
Load More Replies...I cannot understand how someone can say that they are the A too. Other people made plan for them, and when they try to refuse, they literally tried to guilt them to go (both MIL and BIL), yet idiots in the coments are like “you didn’t answer correctly to someone trying to force you to do something “
I think it was just the way they said it, if they didn't say it was work to see family everyone would have said NTA I think
Load More Replies...
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