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“It Suddenly Clicked”: People Online Share The 30 Worst Ways They Found Out They Were Being Cheated On
Normally people do not spy on their romantic partners, hoping to build a relationship based on trust and respect. However, once certain signs come to the surface, one would have to be blind to ignore them. One clue leads to another until your partner is suddenly revealed to not be what you thought they were or what you wished them to be. The reasons behind the cheating, as well as the outcomes afterwards, can vary a lot. However, the experience of the walls of trust and hope falling down all at once is usually disturbing and painful even to simply read about it. Still, bringing the bitter truth to light is better than living in a lie and false trust, as it gives a chance to move forward. These people are doing just that, putting their stories out there for others to read and see them with a little perspective.
More info: Reddit
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#1
He told me. I guess I respect him for that. He told me he had been with another woman and really wants to be with her. Of course it hurt but I appreciate his honesty and don't hate him even though he hurt me.
Then she cheated on him and I felt even better lol
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#2
I checked his phone.
My daughter was playing with it in a locked room with me while I painted the doorway; I'd locked the door so that no one knocked over the paints. I honestly wasn't planning on checking his phone; I was completely absorbed in painting.
He kept knocking to ask for the phone and I kept telling him he needed to wait, I wasn't moving the paint to open the door. When he knocked the third time in less than 5 minutes, it suddenly clicked: the phone was unlocked and there was something on it he didn't want me to see.
If he'd just respected my boundaries and let me finish painting, I wouldn't have even thought to check the phone. His own behavior outed him.
A gay cat man 1 year ago
if i acted like he did, OF COUSE my partner would check my phone, plus in a good relationship, without cheating, you should trust your partner with your phone
#3
Back when instant messaging was a computer thing, I logged onto our home computer. I had taken the day off for my birthday. He wasn’t home but was usually home during the day. Anyway, while I was searching for music, an instant message popped up with the words babe in it. So I pretended I was him for a bit & then revealed myself. She didn’t know I existed. She thought he was a single dad raising his kid alone. Apparently I was dead. Lol. By the time he got home, all of his personal s**t was packed. I’m not someone who can forgive that treacherous behavior.
#4
He randomly started accusing me of cheating. (Spoiler alert: I wasn’t) Yay for projecting.
Sanguinius 1 year ago
I used to semi-date a woman who did something weirdly related to this. She would be with someone, start stepping out and not hiding it very convincingly, then would get accused of cheating by the first person. Then as a retaliation for being accused of cheating, she would cheat and nuke the relationship. I was like... a side-guy during several of these relationships. Funny thing is she wouldn't be accused of cheating with ME cuz everyone thought I was a puppy dog.
#5
He told me after ghosting me for 2-3 days, that he was with another woman during that time. During which i went to the gyno alone to get an abortion because of him...that he knew about and had promised to come with me.
Yeah, f**k that guy. Hope he rots in hell.
Susan Teter 1 year ago
My Dad said it best...nail his nuts to a dead stump, set it on fire, and give him a butter knife. He thinks he's got it all figured out, I'm sure he will make a good choice
#6
My son's dog had been hit by a car. When she was at home recovering from surgery, she was at the stage where she could pull herself around the room.
One night I woke up needing painkillers (normal for me) but when I went to the living room to get them I dropped one. Terrified the dog would find it and die (after my son had spent 18K on surgery for her) I grabbed my husband's phone which was charging to use a torch.
On the screen were notifications from a website...won't mention the name but clearly for hookups. It was 3am-ish so I was like, can't process this now...went to bed. Following day did some Googling...yep just as I thought.
One of the things that I really can't stand is when you accuse someone of doing something they deny it...so I set about gathering evidence.
When he was out the next evening, I logged on to his Gmail (had always had the password, just never used it). Found heaps more messages and oh lookie...the links to the website passed the login thru so I didn't need his password for the site...even MORE messages, including ones where he had arranged to meet. All of them were bawdy 'I wanna fsck your brains out' type messages, nothing romantic. Got lots of screenshots.
Was getting angrier and angrier at this point.
Soooo...I signed up to the site, created a profile, no pic. Sent him a message that said 'You wanna get fscked? Well guess what...you're fscked...this is your wife!
Saw the message hit his Gmail and get deleted immediately (him on his phone). But not before I grabbed one last screenshot...
S**t hit the fan when he got home...
#7
He was having too many "extra shifts", but still getting the same money at the end of the month.
#8
His ex sent screenshots of texts he sent her.
#9
He bet his friend 20$ he could sleep with a certain girl and then said at a later date, in front of me, “oh by the way you owe me that 20$” 😬
#10
He posted it on Facebook. Dumbass thought I could not see Facebook in Germany. Guess what I can and even if I could not half of my friends were his Facebook friends and messaged me immediately. In case your wondering what his post was it was something like “when your so fly that you can f**k your ex and your main girl has no idea” I can’t remember the wording but you get the deal. He was sleeping with his ex for months. She had no idea we were still together or so she claims
FakeOptimist 1 year ago
Maybe she also lived in Germany and (claimed she) couldn't see Facebook...
#11
The first time, he told me. The next 100 times, I guessed his social media password and watched it all happening in real time. Not my proudest moment and thankfully 30 year old me understands her self worth a lot more than 20 year old me did.
#12
He accidentally sent me a video of himself having [making love] with someone else. I was like that’s not me!
#13
When he started keeping his phone upside down when he had always had it face up our entire relationship
#14
I had a gut feeling for so long, and eventually broke things off because I knew I couldn’t trust him out of my sight. Then a couple years later, the other woman reached out to me. She’d had no idea at the time that he and I were involved. I was so thankful that we were both finally able to confirm the truth and we tried to figure out how we could get revenge… in the end we decided it wasn’t worth it. On the plus side, the other woman and I are very close friends now, and we’re both happily married.
The cheating a*****e is married too, to the other-other-woman… yep, he was messing around with at least three women at once, possibly more. My friend had stopped seeing him when she realized other-other-woman was in the picture.
The a*****e tried to reach back out to me throughout the years, but I never responded and blocked him. He made one last attempt to reach out, and then a few months later, my friend heard through the grapevine that his wife was expecting. Based on the due date, his wife had probably just gotten her first positive pregnancy tests while he was stalking me all over the internet, and knowing him he must’ve been freaking the f**k out that his days of freedom and irresponsibility were over. My friend and I are both very happy that we dodged that bullet.
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 1 year ago
I love it when the people being cheated on end up as friends :) even better if they get together but alas not everyone has my gay heart
#15
I walked in the front door.
#16
My then normally introverted partner suddenly started talking to people online. No big deal, I'm not jealous or anything. I got major suspicions when she wanted to stay the weekend with a friend she met online. It was a six hour drive away in Chicago. I let her do it, she's an adult. I can't stop it. I knew something was up. And I was right. She came back and she had the gall to ask me if we can be a poly relationship. It was a firm "NO". You either get me or not at all.
TheElderNom 1 year ago
Even if you were okay with being in a poly relationship, being asked AFTER the fact is a big no.
#17
He would have gotten away with it if he didn’t act like such a buffoon. I was looking through his tagged pictures on Instagram and saw one of him with another woman from before we met. The caption implied they were just friends so initially I didn’t suspect anything. I just asked him who she was because he’d never mentioned anyone by that name before. He used to talk about his friends from back home in America all the time, including female ones, but had never mentioned her. The look of panic on his face was almost cartoonish. He started blabbing about how she’s a friend of his from college, but they don’t talk anymore and he definitely doesn’t even remember her that much. I knew this man was lying through his teeth but I wanted solid evidence first so I just said “oh, okay babe! That’s cool!” He looked so relieved. Idiot.
His mysterious friend didn’t have much on her Instagram and something told me to check who he was following on Spotify. He only followed two people - me and her. I looked through her playlists and found one called “[my country’s name] road trip 2022”. It was a collaborative playlist and my boyfriend had contributed a million songs to it, including lots that I’d introduced him to! I did some more sleuthing and found a comment on one of his band’s YouTube videos saying “so proud of you babe❤️❤️❤️”. I clicked on the profile and it was hers. There were a million videos of them together and of her by herself. In her newest one dated only a few days earlier, she mentioned coming to my country in the summer to visit her boyfriend.
A few days later when we were having dinner I asked him if he had anything he wanted to tell me. He started stuttering and saying “nooo? What the hell are you talking about babe?” I told him to choose his words carefully because I wouldn’t have asked him if I didn’t already know the answer. He started going off on a tangent about how she’s not his girlfriend, but it’s a “complicated situation” and that he told me about it when we first got together so he thought I knew about it and was fine with it. I asked him if he thought I was stupid and he said no. I told him he never told me and he said he didn’t and he was sorry. I told him that it was over and this was the last time we would ever see each other.
I’m not the kind of person to go snooping through people’s socials, so if he had just nonchalantly told me she was a friend from college, I wouldn’t have pressed it. Absolute idiot! His own behaviour outed him
#18
His friend told me and sent me proof.
#19
I looked at him while she was in the room. She was “my friend” . The eye contact was all I needed to know he was cheating.
#20
He always had strict rules about me being friends with other guys. Then being secretive about his phone. Him coming home with new clothes for him and our kids from his “boss.” Where are my new clothes? I wonder. A late night text to her that he sent to me. Co-mingling of money which I used against him in court. 💅 I stayed longer to gather evidence. By then he had moved into the other bedroom because “he was tired of the kids always being in our bed.” The same kids I spent hours with putting to bed (never him) but who would get up later and he wouldn’t put back to bed in their own room. I eventually stopped because it was too much effort and frustration on my part. So glad to be out.
#23
I found a condom wrapper on our bedside table. He was a cheater, a slob and a dumbass.
#24
He broke up with me saying he wasn’t happy anymore. Eventually it came out that he cheated multiple times and felt guilty but didn’t want to admit it. We were engaged. He tried getting me to take him back and even chased me (not literally) out of a target 6 months later screaming I love you and begging me to just give him 5 minutes to talk.
F*****g nuts to think about now.
#25
I just knew. Things didn’t add up, he was way to protective of his phone, I found condoms that we damn sure weren’t using, and eventually someone said they saw him flat out in public with another woman. I never wanted to believe it so I stupidly just endured it for years
#26
When her phone connected to my truck. Her boo txted her and it played a very sweet message across the speakers lol
#27
I had a dream that I went through this phone and found girls on there. He fell asleep once with his phone on & I know I shouldn’t have but I went thru it & he had screenshots/screen recordings of him sexting online with many girls & also screenshots of local prostitutes. In his messages he was texting these other two girls who told me were his “friends That knew about us being together”. I was sick to my stomach. Trust your intuition.
Passerby 1 year ago
The start of this one is a little dubious, but I can believe that maybe you subconsciously know that he is cheating, maybe through his behaviours and other signs, and all these things culminated into your dream. A little far-fetched, perhaps, but it is one possible explanation.
#28
My ex boyfriend was projecting onto me, saying I was messaging people behind his back, mind you this was out of nowhere. He decided to go through my phone while telling I had been caught and I’m a cheater, he found nothing. I decided to do the same and grabbed his phone and in his text messages I saw he had downloaded tinder, I opened instagram and his most recent message was him trying to slide into someone’s dm’s and the same on Snapchat. Worst this was that majority of the girls he tried hitting up did not respond to him, that embarrassed me even more than knowing I was cheated on 1 yr after having a baby together 😆
#29
I caught him out when we were both sick with covid back in Jan 2021. We were sleeping separately as I tested positive first but then we carried on as we were both coughing and couldn’t sleep, or at least that’s what I thought was the reason. I would notice he was always, and I mean always, online on Snapchat and just generally acting super shifty. My spidey senses were tingling. Whenever I would come in the room he would log out and place the phone face down. When he heard me coming down the stairs and he was in the living room I would see him hide his phone down the side of the sofa. He was being super shifty so I called him out. He twisted it and made me feel like I was crazy.
He then changed how he sat in the living room so he was facing the doorway and stairs so he wouldn’t have to hide his phone as the screen wasn’t facing the door.
I got sick of this and honestly thought I was having a psychotic break so after talking to a friend I decided to get a nanny cam to see what he was doing when he thought I couldn’t see, I felt crazy doing this but needed to know one way or the other. Low and behold he was checking out porn through secret Twitter/TikTok/Instagram accounts and the cherry on the cake was him sexting a girl he worked with who had just had a baby with her fiancé. I caught him staring at a sexy selfie she sent him, then he tried to be cute and crawled across the floor to me and invited me to come upstairs for some sexy time.
Before the heartbreak set in I was over the moon that I wasn’t going crazy and that I was right in my suspicions that he constantly twisted.
I ended the relationship, which followed by the worst 5 weeks of my life as I had to watch as he went on not so secret dates with her and went and had ‘breakfast’ with her before he moved out (I didn’t know who she was at the time, only a month or two after he moved out and found out that he was going over there after her fiancé had gone to work).
I found out that her fiancé had suspicions about her also after he found a Christmas card from my bf that said ‘I love you so much’. I also confirmed that a keyring that showed up on his keys 3 weeks after our split that said ‘I love you, the end, I win’ was one of two that she bought. One for my ex and one for her fiancé.
He finally moved out at the end of feb 2021 and monkey branched his way to her, I filled her fiancé (ex by the time I found him) on everything I knew so he had a full timeline of events to use in case there was a custody battle
#30
I was scrolling on fb and he popped up on my people you may know, under a different name, and kissing another girl in the profile pic. We met while he was living in the US illegally, got engaged super quick. I was about to go work on a cruise ship for 6 months. I went with him back to Mexico before I shipped out and was gonna move there with him after my contract. The dumbass was about to have a real nice life and he couldn’t didn’t even make it 2 months without getting caught
What do you think ?
TheOfficialJesusChrist 1 year ago
don't worry :D i put all these stupid guys and girls in hell :)
Ilia Bauer 1 year ago
He messaged the group chat that me, him, my best friend, and her boyfriend were in and using to coordinate a trip to Disneyland. He introduced his new girlfriend of one month. Said we needed to get him and his girlfriend a room for themselves. I sweetly asked him if it had ever occurred to him to break up with me FIRST before getting a new girlfriend. He got really stuttery and awkward. I booted him and blocked him. He was offended and that I didn't want to be friends anymore.
Tree P 1 year ago (edited)
Sorry that happened to you. Some men are clueless twatwaffles. Hope you found better.
Load More Replies...
Isabelle Lamarque 1 year ago
His stepbrother sent me a link to YouTube. Mario's song ''you should let me love you.'' where he sings about the guy cheating on her and that he would love her better. Apparently he knew his brother was cheating on my and he had a crush on me himself (which I kinda knew already). Broke up with my bf but never got with his stepbrother tho 😅
TheOfficialJesusChrist 1 year ago
don't worry :D i put all these stupid guys and girls in hell :)
Ilia Bauer 1 year ago
He messaged the group chat that me, him, my best friend, and her boyfriend were in and using to coordinate a trip to Disneyland. He introduced his new girlfriend of one month. Said we needed to get him and his girlfriend a room for themselves. I sweetly asked him if it had ever occurred to him to break up with me FIRST before getting a new girlfriend. He got really stuttery and awkward. I booted him and blocked him. He was offended and that I didn't want to be friends anymore.
Tree P 1 year ago (edited)
Sorry that happened to you. Some men are clueless twatwaffles. Hope you found better.
Load More Replies... Isabelle Lamarque 1 year ago
His stepbrother sent me a link to YouTube. Mario's song ''you should let me love you.'' where he sings about the guy cheating on her and that he would love her better. Apparently he knew his brother was cheating on my and he had a crush on me himself (which I kinda knew already). Broke up with my bf but never got with his stepbrother tho 😅
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