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Husband Berates Wife Over Raisin Count In Oatmeal, Raises Online Outrage
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Husband Berates Wife Over Raisin Count In Oatmeal, Raises Online Outrage

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Making a tasty meal for your partner is a nice gesture. It shows them you care, makes them feel appreciated, and strengthens the bond between two people. But what about the times when your partner doesn’t appreciate you for it? Even worse, when they get angry?

This woman had to deal with her husband’s tantrum over oatmeal. As the guy was very particular about the number of raisins he wanted in his breakfast, he exploded in rage when she put 18 instead of the usual 12 raisins in his oatmeal. The wife asked other netizens if she was a jerk for not counting them that one time, or was the husband at fault here?

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, especially when your loving partner makes it for you

Image credits: Ryan Pouncy / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

But this guy didn’t think so when his wife put the wrong number of raisins in his oatmeal

Image source:

Cooking for a partner is a nice way to show affection, but cooking together strengthens a relationship

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For some, cooking is a hobby and an art. Others view it as a simple chore. A 2022 global Gallup survey revealed that women still cook more at home than men do. On average, women cooked nine meals a week, while men cooked only four. The survey showed one more interesting fact: women outcook their husbands in most countries but one: Italy.

There’s nothing wrong with making breakfast, lunch, or dinner for your partner or being the one who’s responsible for literally putting food on the table. Yet many experts actually recommend couples cook together. They say it can strengthen the relationship and make partners appreciate one another more.

A licensed relationship therapist, Jaime Bronstein, told Brides that doing any activities together creates a stronger bond. Cooking together requires patience, communication, and sharing responsibilities, so it’s a great exercise in working together. “Cooking together takes cooperation and planning. I believe a couple that cooks together stays together,” Bronstein said.

However, one partner doing the cooking is also a demonstration of love and affection. The saying ‘food is love’ is so widely known for a reason. “You are sharing, giving, and receiving love; it’s a win-win scenario,” Bronstein explained.

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Eating disorders can manifest themselves in subtle ways

When we think of eating disorders, we most often picture women. The media we consume would have us believe that the signs of someone having an ED are quite visible: weight loss/gain, not eating or overeating, and obsessive calorie counting. In reality, men and boys develop eating disorders, too. The National Eating Disorders Association reports that 6.6 million males can be affected by an eating disorder at some point in their lives.

The husband in this story might just be a picky eater who wants his breakfast in a very particular way. However, in some cases, strange eating patterns and behaviors can signal a possible eating disorder. That’s what some commenters pointed out, as they asked whether he ever was diagnosed either with an OCD or some eating disorder.

Another misconception is that people who eat healthy can’t have an eating disorder. In reality, people who obsess over healthy foods might exhibit symptoms of orthorexia. It is an eating disorder defined by “an unhealthy obsession with eating healthy food.” However, it is not recognized by the APA as a psychiatric illness.

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Kristen Ross, LLPC, CAM, a counselor at Beaumont’s Weight Control Center, says that people who are trying to improve their eating habits and eat more healthily are at risk of developing orthorexia. If they adopt an all-or-nothing mindset, they start to avoid certain foods in order to be “healthier.”

Orthorexia is defined by an unhealthy fixation on eating healthy

The National Eating Disorders Association writes that worrying about eating healthy in and of itself isn’t a disorder. It becomes problematic when people start obsessing with healthy eating so much they “damage their own well-being and experience health consequences such as malnutrition and/or impairment of psychosocial functioning.”

NEDA lists compulsive checking of ingredient lists and nutritional labels as one of the signs of orthorexia. High levels of perfectionism is another. As of now, there are no clinical treatments for it, but ED experts treat it as a mix of OCD and anorexia nervosa. They encourage the person to eat a variety of foods and expose them to foods that provoke fear or anxiety.

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At the end of the day, only an eating disorder specialist can diagnose someone with something like orthorexia. Observations from commenters on Reddit or any publications can only speculate. Those who worry their spouse or loved one might be experiencing symptoms of an ED should talk to them about seeing a specialist.

Some commenters suggested hilarious revenge tactics, and the wife had a chuckle at them

Others told her not to blame herself and said his obsessive behavior might be a sign of something more serious

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Kornelija Viečaitė

Kornelija Viečaitė

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

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Kornelija Viečaitė

Kornelija Viečaitė

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

Jonas Zvilius

Jonas Zvilius

Author, BoredPanda staff

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This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself.

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Jonas Zvilius

Jonas Zvilius

Author, BoredPanda staff

This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself.

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Weasel Wise
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good plan! Have a child with a selfish man-child!! Goddàmn, humans are idiots.

FreeTheUnicorn
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good that she has practice negotiating meals with a toddler, so she's got that part of parenthood down! My partner is picky with food, he will eat what I make, but he often doesn't like it, or has anxiety that he won't, so he cooks nearly all his meals. Lots of mine too. I help him when I can by cutting veg etc, but if food is an issue, make it yourself. Oatmeal take no time at all, he can get up ten minutes earlier to cook for himself instead of knit picking his pregnant wife. Here's an actual parenting tip, if you can cut out the friction areas/pinch points, cut them out. It's not just choose your battles, it's don't foment wars. if your cooking is a flash point, he can cook. You can swap chores or just cook separately.

Trista JW
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've no problem admitting I am a raging b***h. If anyone (I don't care who it is) made such a stupidly unreasonable demand, I would intentionally sabotage their breakfast. That oatmeal would be made with flavored coffee creamer, paprika and salt instead of cinnamon and would have chocolate chips thrown in for good measure. (Exactly 13.) If I was questioned, my answer would be "Get off your a*s and cook for yourself, you ungrateful bastard." (No matter if they were male, female or otherwise. Bastard is universal.)

Load More Comments
Weasel Wise
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good plan! Have a child with a selfish man-child!! Goddàmn, humans are idiots.

FreeTheUnicorn
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good that she has practice negotiating meals with a toddler, so she's got that part of parenthood down! My partner is picky with food, he will eat what I make, but he often doesn't like it, or has anxiety that he won't, so he cooks nearly all his meals. Lots of mine too. I help him when I can by cutting veg etc, but if food is an issue, make it yourself. Oatmeal take no time at all, he can get up ten minutes earlier to cook for himself instead of knit picking his pregnant wife. Here's an actual parenting tip, if you can cut out the friction areas/pinch points, cut them out. It's not just choose your battles, it's don't foment wars. if your cooking is a flash point, he can cook. You can swap chores or just cook separately.

Trista JW
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've no problem admitting I am a raging b***h. If anyone (I don't care who it is) made such a stupidly unreasonable demand, I would intentionally sabotage their breakfast. That oatmeal would be made with flavored coffee creamer, paprika and salt instead of cinnamon and would have chocolate chips thrown in for good measure. (Exactly 13.) If I was questioned, my answer would be "Get off your a*s and cook for yourself, you ungrateful bastard." (No matter if they were male, female or otherwise. Bastard is universal.)

Load More Comments
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