Life is rarely black and white. Happiness often comes wrapped in a sheet of sadness, longing, sometimes even regret. Complex emotions are what make us human.
To find out more about these dualities, Redditor BlaasianCowboyPanda posted a question on the platform, asking: "People of Reddit, what is the most bittersweet situation you've experienced?" And they've been heard.
From letting go of your loved ones to helping your pet cross the rainbow bridge, here are some of the most touching memories that were shared in the comments.
This post may include affiliate links.
Adopting a decrepit senior dog with one hot mess of a body. He was cherished and adored by myself and daughter. My daughter was his main squeeze. He had health problems galore but he always persevered, and for a brief moment he got to BE a dog.
One year ago we helped him cross the rainbow bridge. My daughter made the decision that she would be there, she held his snout in her hands and kissed him the entire time. She was so brave, because of him.
This is what we must all endure. Loving somebody till death us do part, animal or human, means exactly that: being there when they have to face their last fear.
BlaasianCowboyPanda can't remember where they were going exactly, but they came up with the idea for the post when they were driving and listening to various stories on Reddit via YouTube. "I'll have to find the video again as I've forgotten the details, but I believe it was a story of someone passing away," BlaasianCowboyPanda tells Bored Panda.
"The one deceased in the story meant a lot to OP, but OP remained positive despite it. That pulled on my heartstrings and made me wonder just how many people go through a similar feeling. I went onto Reddit later when I could and submitted my question late at night before falling asleep."
Sitting in the hospital room, mom was about ready to pass away from cancer, everything was shutting down internally. The date was my parents' 40th wedding anniversary. The last thing dad said to her was 'Thank you for 40 wonderful years.'
Recently had one last sleepover with my childhood friend before he passed from leukemia. It was just like being kids again.
He couldn’t do much at the point he’d reached, but we listened to music, watched Luca (which he hadn’t yet seen), and just talked about life. And of course we stayed up way past bedtime haha
I'm glad that you got to enjoy your finally memories together, and enjoy life as it once was
The Redditor went through a lot of the replies. "In regards to all the users who took time out of their day and graced us with their personal life stories, it feels like there is one common trait—departure. Whether it takes the form of leaving one's home or the loss of a loved one's life, the circumstances don't seem to change the feeling," they explain.
"When confronted with the reality that something major in your life is changing, one can't help but take a trip down memory lane and reflect on these memories to the events happening before them."
Waking up from a suicide attempt.
Bitter because I woke up, sweet because I woke up.
I always looked back so longingly on my first love. It was the summer we both turned 18 and it was my first time falling in love and everything seemed magic. She was a lifeguard and I still remember her long legs splayed over the lifeguard chair, her long blonde hair, her tan skin, her movie star sun glasses. On that lifeguard stand up high she was a shrine to everything summer. And I freaking loved summer. I had a manual labor job putting in swimming pools, damn that was so hot down there laying plaster with that Kansas City humidity.
We fell in love that summer and did everything together, every waking hour we could we spent together. In the day we would go down to the creek together and wade in the water and swim and lay on the shore, she always wanted to ride on my back across the creek to get to the other side, our side, where no one ever went but us. Sometimes we would climb on those oversized hay bales by my house and stare up into that cloudless summer sky and talk about what the future would be and going off to college and running track and the Olympics and how we would always love each other.
My favorite days though, God damnit I loved these days so much was when it rained. We both got off work when it rained so I would get an early call from my boss canceling my work and I would just lay there and smile and look at the ceiling and wait for my phone to ring, it was always her telling me to come over and we could spend the day together. Movies or the mall sometimes but usually we would climb over the gate to the swimming beach and go swim in the lake and feel the warm rain and dive under the water and come up over the dock. Best times of my life.
I've always looked back on them so longingly.I've been in love since and been married and divorced and dating but it seems my thoughts always came back to her. Even though we live in the same city it was 15 years since I had seen her. Back when I got married to someone else I had an outdoor wedding and even from the front I could hear her sobbing when I said the vows that I wanted to grow old with my wife, that was from a movie my first love and I used to watch together sometimes when it rained. She left right after the wedding and I hadn't seen her again for 15 years. I longed to see her, I even contacted her one time and suggested meeting up but she said she was happily married and would never meet up with me, even to just talk and reminisce. I longed to see her again just one more time.
Well it happened, I saw her again for the first time in 15 years. We were both at a U2 concert and we hugged and laughed and even danced when they played With or Without You. That night we all had a great time and we walked the women all the way to their car before going to ours. I realized when I saw her Honda minivan and sippy cups from her kids and saw her face that had gotten older that I didn't long for her. Don't get me wrong, she was still beautiful, incredibly beautiful. But she wasn't the girl on top of the lifeguard stand anymore. She had gone on with her life and had kids and drove a sensible minivan and wore sensible mom shoes. And then I realized I didn't long for her at all. What I had a longing for was me. When I was 18 and athletic and handsome, with my whole life ahead of me, that was what I longed for more than anything. A life before mortgages and bills and small backyards in the suburbs with fences, I longed for that part of me that was still back there with her at the creek. What it was like to fall in love and swim under the dock in the rain and laugh and hear the words I love you for the first time. I didn't miss her at all. I missed me. It was the most bittersweet realization of my life.
This was the best thing I've ever read about nostalgia. Sometimes I feel the same.
The American Psychological Association (APA) points out that societies have developed various rituals around ending important life periods: people get together for a last meal, throw a good-bye party, or simply see their visitors off at the airport. But why do we go through all of this effort rather than moving on right away to what the future holds?
To answer this question, we can look at the concept of a well-rounded ending, introduced by Schwörer, Krott, and Oettingen in their 2020 article. It's an ending marked by a sense of closure. Specifically, people describe an ending as well-rounded if they feel that they have done everything they could have, that they have completed something to the fullest, and that all loose ends are tied up.
About ten years ago just before she died of lung cancer, my mom called me by my childhood nickname, told me she loved me and then fell asleep. That was the last thing she ever said to me. I was 35 when she died and she hadn't called me that nickname in maybe 30 years. I still tear up thinking about it.
My fiance's funeral. It was literally the first time I got to meet his mom. And she was such a sweet lady. When I tried to give her back my ring because it had belonged to her mother. She refused to take it, she told me "My son chose you to give it to. And it would be rude of me to take back his choice." She probably still has no idea how much it meant to me.
I literally have no pictures or anything of him. But I still have my memories and my ring I keep in my jewelry box.
Let's not question this. It still hurts. She doesn't need to explain anything.
The authors discovered that a well-rounded ending is associated with high positive effect, low regret, and an easier transition into the subsequent phase compared to just jumping into it straight away. For example, if an exchange student spends the last night of their visit abroad with their new friends at a bar reminiscing about the time they've had, they will feel like they've missed out on fewer opportunities, and settling into their home again will be easier.
My family got a puppy when I was about 5. My freshman year of college he had to be put down. Every part of his body was failing. He couldn't stand on his own, fur falling out, infections that wouldn't go away, etc. and the vets couldn't help him no matter what they did. My mother finally made the choice to let him go peacefully rather than try to force any more treatments and hope they ease it. I opted to be the person to go back with him when the time came.
I held him and cried. But I pet him behind the ears the way he always liked and made sure he knew he had one of his humans there. There was relief in his eyes when he went. Like he understood what was happening and was okay with it. Finally able to rest.
I didn't want to let my childhood pet go. But I'm glad he didn't have to keep suffering and he didn't have to go out alone.
I always get so sad thinking about this with my pets. My cat is elderly and has thyroid disease, but I always think of it as even though I never want to let go of my animals, it does open a new space in my heart to rescue another animal in need just like I did before
Oh man. I'm always a sucker for the long love.
Amidst a loooong illness in hospice and dementia that meant he recognized no one my Grampie still lit up every day when my Grammie showed up. He would turn to whoever else was in the room and say "ah, I'm just the luckiest fella in the world to have the most beautiful woman in the world to love. I love you, Dolly."
She got to be there when he passed away and she died a few months later. I think she was just waiting for him to go first.
We can see this in the stories as well. "From what I can tell, there is very little regret among the replies. At least from the most popular and well-documented lines," BlaasianCowboyPanda says. "They all seem better from it and have taken to heart that these changes are a milestone in their lives. They grow better for it and will never forget for the rest of their lives."
"Make memories, and if you can't do that then make feelings instead," the Redditor adds. "It's never too late."
My friend and his fiance wanted a baby and were doing IVF treatment and were down to their last chance. She got pregnant but my friend died three months in from a sudden heart attack.
So basically super bitter for six months but then his daughter was born and is healthy and beautiful.
Spending the last month of my mom's life caring for her, teamed up with my sister. We laughed, we cried, we looked at photo books, we ate lots of Mexican tater tots and coffee shakes. Of course, losing her to cancer was horrible, but it was her choice not to seek treatment, so my sister and I decided that, if she was going to go, we would give her the happiest sendoff we could. She died contentedly in her own bed, in the arms of her daughters and granddaughters.
I really can't stop crying now. 'Tis a fearful thing to love what death can touch.
Moving back to my own country after studying in the US for 3 years. I was sad to leave my friends, but happy to leave the country.
I realize it likely seems small, but sending my youngest off to college. He’s not “mine” per se, but he’s basically mine just the same and has been since he was ~4 and I became his step-mom. He has grown into an interesting, funny, intelligent, and kind-hearted young man with the sweetest heart you’ve ever encountered. Literally, I choose to hang out with him over many other people in my life. He’s worked very hard to earn his scholarship to college, and his dad and I are incredibly proud of him. I love seeing him succeed and reap the benefits of his work. I love seeing him begin to spread his wings and fly.
But I miss the absolute hell out of him. Coolest damn step-son on the planet, and I’ve been lucky enough to claim him as my own.
The last time I saw my Grandpa. He was in a coma, had been battling Parkinson’s for years. My relatives were talking to the nurse while I sat next to him, holding his hand. For a split second, he slightly opened his eyes, and softly smiled. I will never forget that, it brings so much peace but also pain.
What a beautiful private moment between you and your Grandpa. How ever old you get you will never forget his smile.
My daughter's double amputation just after her first birthday. It was the most difficult experience of my life, especially the hours leading up to her going into surgery, and I'm too squeamish to let myself think about what the procedure actually involved. But due to a bone defect she would never have been able to walk, or run it dance or climb, unless she'd had the operation. We had to sacrifice her adorable little baby feet. We lost a little part of her that day, but she gained the ability to walk, so it was totally worth it.
If I ever feel sad about what she went through, I just look at her and the sadness goes away because I'm bursting with pride.
My first two pets were two parakeets (aka Budgies). Both passed about 5 months apart but they both said goodbye to me in a way I haven't gotten to experience with any other pet. They were never fully tame and mostly just liked to go out of their cage and spend time together on the curtains or somewhere else that they could perch.
The first to pass was eggbound and her passing was devastating but instead of being alone when she passed I was able to hold her and she rested her head on my finger and chirped once before her time came. The second lived for another 5 months and was never as bouncy as before but in the last month, for an unknown reason she became incredibly tame. Not only did she perch, she would run up to me and snuggle against me. She continued this until one evening she passed peacefully.
I still miss them to this day, but I will always appreciate the goodbyes they gave to me. Here's to you Sunny and Sky.
Breaking up with my then girlfriend because her dream of moving abroad permanently was coming true. I was happy for her but sad to see her leave
Well I may be getting deployed unexpectedly due to the current craziness in the world, so my wife and I decided to get married Saturday.
Happiest day of my life, but I'm nervous about possibly having to leave this week or next.
I let her go. Because i knew i was not the right man for her. It's been years but she still visites me in my dreams and she always smiles at me. Sometime ago i woke up with tears in my eyes. I loved her. When ever i saw her i immidiately felt good, warm inside. She is happy now i know this. And i'm still convinced i made the right decision, she found a better man. But when I think of her, sometimes..., you know... "what if..." Love hurts but i'll keep a special place in my heart, just for her :)
I had a similar feeling about my ex-husband. He was my first love, but was a "Peter Pan". I knew we could never work. I wanted children, and a home. We were divorced 25 years ago, and I've been, happily, married to my current husband for 22 years. But I have dreamt about my ex-husband so vividly over the years. He died in January, and I had to be alone. I couldn't explain to my husband, or children how this devastated me.
Holding my grandfather's hand as he passed away. It was incredibly sad to see him go, but also relieving to see that it was peaceful and that he had been released.
Unintentional pregnancy the month after a miscarriage.
The pregnancy I'd lost had been planned, wanted, and tried for. The baby had a name and a place in the family I was building for myself. The miscarriage was physically traumatic, required surgical intervention, and had me seriously questioning if I ever wanted to be pregnant again if I risked that happening a second time. I had just decided that I couldn't face the thought of another pregnancy. And then I missed my period.
I got medical bills from my current pregnancy that said "prenatal care" and bills from my surgical procedure that said "incomplete abortion." I missed one of them somehow and got a call from a debt collector about it shortly after the second baby reached viability. (24 weeks of pregnancy, at which point the baby has 50/50 odds of surviving premature delivery.) My original due date passed and I was pregnant with someone else. And I couldn't get drunk about it, or even just lay in bed not eating or showering, because I was pregnant with someone else.
The second baby is a healthy toddler and is currently watching his big brother play video games. He is very loved. Carrying him scared the absolute s**t out of me.
Watching my babies grow. Obviously I want them to grow well but if I could just pause time for a bit.
I still miss my three year old. He's somehow grown up now and I'm not done carrying him on my hip yet.
At my grandmas viewing my little cousin (2)and her dad (my uncle) walked up to see her and to say their goodbyes. As they walked away my little cousin turned to her and waved goodbye
A friend's step father had been thru a nasty divorce ~20 years back at the time. Was told his disabled daughter died in a car accident. His daughter was told he died in a car accident.
Daughter never stopped looking for him but he was a very tin foil hat kinda man. Didn't work anything that wasn't under the table, Didn't own anything that could be tracked, whole nine.
He had a fall one night and got very sick. Decided to marry his long time girlfriend for the health insurance.. court house wedding, straight to the hospital. He was hours away from death, was put into a medical coma and admitted to ICU. Lots of touch and go. Needed major heart surgery and some other unattended health issues caused complications.
I was living him and his new wife at the time. Wife was with him at the hospital when his daughter showed up at the door. She found him through the marriage certificate. I had to pull her caregiver aside and tell her dad might not make it after she spent some 20 years looking for him.
He lived a few years after that so was a happy reunion for them. But they day she found him finally, just to be told he may be on his death bed. I'll never forget that moment.
Truly heartbreaking. I hope that they enjoyed their first and final moments together.
divorcing my ex. she cheated and was abusive. it was LONG overdue and any feelings were and are gone, but the old romantic side wanted to be married until the end. wanted a 50 year anniversary. so sweet in that i was able to break free and find myself, bitter because divorce sucks. remarried and i love my wife to death, but at our ages, the big number anniversaries are very unlikely
It's about quality, not quantity. You know that! Live long and prosper!
Getting the greatest job and worst boss at the same time.
Graduating from university.
I was incredibly sheltered growing up and as a consequence, I was scared of everything and would jump at my own shadow. I had my first taste of freedom at 16 and up until that point, I had never had noteworthy life experiences - no sleepovers, no going to the mall on my own, didn't know how to cook, etc. Yes, my parents had watched me like a hawk growing up and didn't allow me to do a lot on my own. Anyway, on to uni. I was young, tiny, wispy, shaking with anticipation at the prospect of moving out, going away and living in a university dormitory with my peers. I didn’t know anyone. I didn’t think I would make any friends but I did, and we did everything together.
I remember getting sick and missing my mom and my roommate passing me the flu medicine from her own stash. I remember trying alcohol for the first time and my friends laughing silly while a girl throws up behind the couch. I remember discovering boys for the first time and deciding they’re not as icky as I thought. I remember going on road trips, holding hands with strangers I met in a mosh pit, trading kisses and spit with the most beautiful boy only to forget his name and face the day after. My classes were interesting and the beautiful weirdos I met as I hopped and skipped through my university life were just as engaging and so I studied them just as intensely.
I remember surviving my freshman year and being drunk in my own potential. Oh, to be young and invincible! Adulthood has its own set of fun and challenges but I know that I will never be this combination of hope, innocence, curiosity and bravado ever again.
The last conversation I had with my Grandad he was reminiscing about when he was a farmer, and started talking about his horses. I asked him how you took care of a horse back then (he stopped farming in the 1950s, the conversation was in 2004) and he spent a good 30 minutes explaining what they did and how much land you needed etc. A simple conversation about country life and animals, two of his favourite things.
I live in another country so when I said farewell I had a nasty feeling it'd be the final time I ever visited or saw that house. He died 10 months later. The next time I was able to get to England was in 2011 and I visited his grave instead.
And I'm sure it broke your heart. I hope you heard that conversation again.
I finished University not that long ago. I was very excited because I literally went through four years of an engineering degree just for this moment and it finally happened. But the moment the graduation ceremony ended I just turned really sad. It's over. Everything good in University life is over. Plus I'm like, an adult now? What the f**k! I don't want that!
Some life advice from me, an engineer in my late 50s: When you have lived the life of an adult fully responsible for all your decisions for a few years you might look back at these years in college but you would never want to go back. Some of the things that were fun at age 20 are not desirable anymore at age 30. Your interests will change and it can be very satisfying to manage your adult life.
Realizing there was a mutual love with a friend, but that it was platonic, and we absolutely wouldn't work as a couple
Receiving a check for my inheritance as part of Dad's estate.
My dad crying out of happiness while wishing me a happy 15th birthday...
I couldn't really process what I felt, because I was secretly dealing with mental health issues since the past 1-2 years and I pretty much forgot what happiness is and have been in a numb type of mood. I believe that that night was the first time I cried out of what may have been happiness.
I'm pretty sure it was happiness. Reading this was Kismet. I've had mental health issues since I was 11. I have had the most horrible August and cant wait for it to be over. There were times in my life when I was happy but not for a long time now. Hold tight to your memory. When you think about it dont be sad thinking its impossible for that to ever happen again. It happened. Even if for that once. It can happen again. It absolutely can. I'm going to go think of those times now.
When I was 17 or 18 I met a girl online. She lived in Florida, I lived up in New England area. We chatted all the time, got very close. We eventually met when I went down to visit my parents for spring break Senior year of college to FL. I was head over heels in love with her but the age, the distance and not having a career or money at the time really just didn't lend itself to us giving it a shot.
She went into the army for a short time, did service got out. Met a fellow vet who became a firefighter. Had 4 beautiful daughters was really happy for her and figured she had a great life. 3 years ago the husband was cheating on her, recording a house-sitter with a hidden camera in the bathroom and other places, also cheated on this woman with said house sitter and others. Was going to be tried for the recording and for statutory rape of the others who were all under 18.
Before that happened on Halloween that 3 years ago he got drunk, beat the hell out of my friend and fled. Committed suicide.
What that poor woman went through, and the underlying guilt I feel like maybe she would have had a better life if we were together will always seem bittersweet to me.
Saying goodbye to all of my friends and my hometown to move to college. I'm excited for this new adventure but all of us chilling in my basement playing board games for the last time killed me the moment they had to leave. We were all doing just fine until then, when one after another they started crying as we hugged goodbye. I held it together. The moment they drove away I sobbed. Happened about a week and a half ago so it still hurts. I know that I have (and will) experience much more sad things but this is fresh enough that I'm still heartbroken.
You’re sad and that’s a healthy reaction! Be sad awhile and then go forth and conquer your new world!
Finding out my housemates suicide attempt was just a cry for help
I got to hold my newborn nephew for the first time a couple of days ago, and see my younger brother being a first-time Dad. I'm so proud of him and happy for him, and my nephew is adorable. Also, I acknowleged to myself, again, that I will never have a child of my own. I'm disabled, single and 40, and I've never really wanted to have children. I certainly don't have the mental or physical resources to be a good mother. There's still a little bittersweetness, seeing something beautiful that I will never have myself. I am looking forward to being an amazing aunt.
I felt the same way when my first niece was born. She was the first grandchild for our family as well, and the child of my closest sibling. The love I felt (and still do feel) for her was overwhelming. Now, my nephew just became a father, the first grandchild in that generation and the awe and love are still there. I hope I feel that way each and every time.
Load More Replies...I got to hold my newborn nephew for the first time a couple of days ago, and see my younger brother being a first-time Dad. I'm so proud of him and happy for him, and my nephew is adorable. Also, I acknowleged to myself, again, that I will never have a child of my own. I'm disabled, single and 40, and I've never really wanted to have children. I certainly don't have the mental or physical resources to be a good mother. There's still a little bittersweetness, seeing something beautiful that I will never have myself. I am looking forward to being an amazing aunt.
I felt the same way when my first niece was born. She was the first grandchild for our family as well, and the child of my closest sibling. The love I felt (and still do feel) for her was overwhelming. Now, my nephew just became a father, the first grandchild in that generation and the awe and love are still there. I hope I feel that way each and every time.
Load More Replies...