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“They Then Called Me A Jerk”: Person Refuses Parents’ Request To Pay For Their Sister’s College Tuition And Fees
Studying is stressful enough as it is. The constant pressure of meeting tight deadlines and cramming loads of information takes its toll. But the load gets a hell of a lot bigger when one has to deal with the financial side of seeking education as well. Students often have to take loans, which means juggling work and keeping up with the university schedule; and that is not an easy task to do.
Some people receive help from scholarships or family members. Yet these options are also not free from obligation. Scholarships often require impeccable grades or exceptional achievements in sports or other activities. As for families, they might have even higher requirements.
A student from the US poured his heart out online after his parents, who encouraged him to pursue a degree and agreed to cover the expenses, surprised him with a request to pay for the education of his younger sister. Bewildered by the situation, the guy turned to Reddit’s AITA community to ask if he’s the jerk for refusing, as this was never mentioned as part of the deal. He shared his story under the username u/snnsbsbssb and received lots of comments and opinions on the matter.
Image credits: Tima Miroshnichenko (not the actual photo)
RELATED:
A student opened up on Reddit about his parents requesting to pay for his sister’s education
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION (not the actual photo)
The student was later surprised with an unexpected statement from his parents
Image credits: Prostock-studio (not the actual photo)
The OP refused to cover the expenses of his sister’s education
Image credits: u/snnsbsbssb
Student loans are a huge load to bear, especially at a young age. Most of the youngsters are not financially stable when they seek such aid, which makes it hard to pay off. In addition to that, the sum is usually not a small one, thus, returning it takes quite some time, too.
The average amount a student seeking a bachelor’s degree in a public university in the US borrows is nearly 33 thousand dollars. That might be difficult to cover with a part-time job, while stretching yourself thin working longer hours usually ends up hurting the performance at school.
That is one of the reasons parents try to put their kids through school. Some might be saving from the moment the child is born and use it once it’s time for them to start the new chapter. Others might come to a certain agreement with their offspring when they become more independent. No matter the way, it lifts some of the weight off the student’s shoulders and allows them to concentrate on the joys and pains of studying.
As seen in the OP’s case, sometimes help from the family comes with terms and conditions. They are not always discussed in advance and might come as expectations, which are sadly not always realistic. Whether they’re talked over beforehand or not, such expectations create additional stress for the child.
According to the American Psychological Association, parental expectations have been on the rise for the last three decades. The association uncovered that it affects children even more than criticism coming from the parents does. In addition to that, it induces perfectionism as well, which might lead to deterioration of one’s mental well-being.
Unfortunately for the OP, he had to face the pressure of unrealistic expectations of him paying for his sister’s education. To make matters worse, they came as a surprise, as if the situation was not stressful enough. Be that as it may, the young student received plenty of support from the online community he shared his story with.
Members of the community shared their insight and opinions, most of which agreed the OP is not a jerk
What do you think ?
JuniorCJ82 1 year ago
When is it EVER a sibling's "obligation" to pay for a sibling's schooling? NTA 3000. Go NC and move on with your life.
Tams21 1 year ago
It's totally unrealistic for a graduate in any field and at any level to be able to afford to pay the entire college tuition of a sibling, all the more if she's to go to an ivy league university. No matter how much the parents say they want it, there's just no way it's going to happen and this I what the OP needs to tell the parents, if necessary over and over.
Marcellus II 1 year ago
Ivy League is $50--80K/year, not really equal to the occasional first-class domestic upgrade cost.
JuniorCJ82 1 year ago
When is it EVER a sibling's "obligation" to pay for a sibling's schooling? NTA 3000. Go NC and move on with your life.
Tams21 1 year ago
It's totally unrealistic for a graduate in any field and at any level to be able to afford to pay the entire college tuition of a sibling, all the more if she's to go to an ivy league university. No matter how much the parents say they want it, there's just no way it's going to happen and this I what the OP needs to tell the parents, if necessary over and over.
Marcellus II 1 year ago
Ivy League is $50--80K/year, not really equal to the occasional first-class domestic upgrade cost.
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