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Parenting can be challenging, but it’s never boring. Any mom and dad to one of these cheeky little goofballs can tell you that life with children is full of surprises, from delightful to completely unexpected. You never know what your little one will utter next, so you always have to be prepared for, well, virtually anything. Especially immortalizing their precious wisdom by sharing it with everyone online.

As you can probably guess, it’s time for one of the most awaited features of the month — parenting tweets! This June, we at Bored Panda have wrapped up some of the funniest and wittiest things parents have said on Twitter into one truly entertaining collection. After all, every day with kids is an adventure filled with daily shenanigans and excellent one-liners we love to hear, and folks have plenty to say.

So sit back, buckle up, and get ready for a wild ride into the ups and downs of having these little munchkins. Continue scrolling and upvote your favorite entries as you go! And after you’re done, there’s plenty more to laugh at in our previous posts from May, April, and March.

#1

Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

21stcenturysahm Report

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Llewella
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My youngest son makes soufflé's, my oldest son is capable of burning water

RandomFrog(He/They️‍️)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am allowed home alone, will eat healthy by choice and can use the oven whilst my sis is not capable of turning the oven *off* (she knows how to turn it on) and will eat candy/ hoard candy/ lie abt eating healthy and proceed to eat candy. Also cannot be left home alone

Daffodil
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm the former, my sister the latter. We're 16 months apart.

BEACH GOOSE
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Me and my sister. I can't be trusted with ice cream toppings. 😅

Patsy
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Who can, in all fairness. When it comes to toppings, I'll have one of everything please!

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T J R
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Me and my brother are less than a year apart, we were both the trusted kid...until we got bored, then we did dumb stuff together that always ended in us getting in trouble. Haha.

Josh Tall
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

First born having to be a surrogate parent until i joined the NAVY!!!

Rainbird
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was left home alone at age 8 and began babysitting my younger sibling at age 11. They weren't trusted home alone until they were about 15.

Stella
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When you’re old enough to stay home alone for a weekend and take care of things, and you’re not allowed to hold an umbrella…

Matthew Daubenmire
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My oldest daughter, I have an issue with her using my washer. My youngest, has the emotional maturity of a 30 year old. They are 10 years apart.

Lori Lewis
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hahahaha, I'm dying over the not being allowed to hold an umbrella 🤣🤣

Madonna Borromeo
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a friend that had a daughter who was a blond she was such a ditz that my friend died her hair black thinking that might help, like mother like daughter…duh!

Anonymouse
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm the first kid, and my brother is the second one :) (well, maybe not that bad, but...)

Megan Forman
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am the youngest child and this is a perfect description of what I was like as a little kid🤣

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    #2

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    AlanaDimario Report

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    Juan Ghote
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My 18 yr old daughter thanked me for teaching her how to change a flat tyre when she had no phone reception to call roadside assist. Never stop passing on life lessons to your children because they believe they know everything.

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    These little daredevils that parents have to deal with from dusk till dawn bring plenty of wonders that simply need to be shared with the whole world. From honest confessions to hilarious conversations and jokes, moms and dads want to make everyone laugh by sharing stories that tell the universal truth of life with kids. After all, raising a human being from scratch is definitely amusing. And quite a challenge too. The never-ending questions, original ideas, tantrums, and what about the full-on meltdowns? No wonder why the second parents get some peace, they want to talk about their highly demanding yet equally rewarding journey and find some comfort along the way.

    To learn more about navigating the parenting minefield and how the joy the little ones bring helps parents persevere, we reached out to Jade Lloyd, creator of a colorful family and lifestyle blog called The Parenting Jungle. The multi-award nominated blogger said it’s important to talk about how demanding parenting is. "Because it is hard," she told Bored Panda. "Rubik’s-cube-level hard."

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    #4

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    sarabellab123 Report

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    Juan Ghote
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The beauty of todays smart TVs is that you can block all but four channels - leaving only educational channels. Then see if they roll their eye's and say "oK mOm, wHaTeVeR".

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    "You are handed a baby by the nurse and hit the ground running/nappy changing. There is no transition from an adult who can’t follow Pot Noodle instructions to becoming a parent. Having the responsibility for a small human's emotional, social, and physical development, safety, discipline, and education...," she said, adding that the list of what parents have to think of daily is seemingly endless. "Routine, don’t forget to have a good routine!"

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    Daily routines give structure to our days and help our family life run smoothly. "We all thrive on predictability and routine," Jeanette Sawyer Cohen, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and child development consultant told WebMD. "Knowing what to expect helps us feel safe and secure."

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    Steering your family life towards a healthier schedule includes focusing more on a few crucial moments of everyday life, like bedtime. We’ve long heard about the benefits sleeping gives to our physical and mental well-being, so if we want kids to reach the ideal bedtime, we should start by slowly getting them to bed 10 minutes earlier each night. While younger children usually achieve the goal in no time, older kids may be more likely to cooperate if we stick to an earlier bedtime ourselves.

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    Another crucial part of our days is mealtimes. Cohen suggested finding a way to label our dinner routines, even if they change day by day. For example, if the little ones need to eat dinner earlier than usual, those days can be "sandwich days." If a parent is working late, "babysitter days." The clinical psychologist explained that "naming these different experiences makes the variety feel more routine."

    #10

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    BunAndLeggings Report

    However, maintaining a steady schedule is a challenge. After all, these little bundles of joy add plenty of hilarious situations into our daily routines. Jade pointed out that parents also face daunting tasks such as answering questions like, "'Why can’t I see my eyes?' whilst trying desperately to get them to put on shoes — all whilst juggling enormous sleep deficits and trying to figure out TikTok." Still, the blogger added she is driven by love, purpose, and caffeine.

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    #14

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    XplodingUnicorn Report

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    Katie Lutesinger
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definitely go for the hockey mask one. You can set your own hours and the pay is better.

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    Jade revealed that before having children, she had no clue that it was possible to destroy a whole house with porridge and a permanent marker. "I think to make it through the first 18 (to 30, as now they never leave home) years of your child(ren’s) life, you need to have a good sense of humor! Oh, and develop an acceptance of toilet jokes," she told us.

    "Again, maybe tiredness and self-preservation of sanity come into it, but the things (especially small) children do, their comments, questions, and complaints are hilarious. The hardest thing is being fake stern when your child does something they know is wrong but justify it with something like, 'I wanted to know what the dog would taste like if I licked it.'"

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    #16

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    MumInBits Report

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    The lavender Fox
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    MOM.I TOLD YOU,WERE OUT OF YOUR USUAL,YOULL HAVE TO SUFFER WAFFLES."oh,nooo...."

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    #17

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    _MrsC_S Report

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    RafCo (he/him)
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have written this book SOOO many times. Wife, I can't get her to eat her veggies. Me: Oh, just do this.... Wife: Okay, do it. Me: doing the thing. Me (thirty minutes later): I can't get her to eat her veggies. Wife: Oh no, when you take over it's your problem.

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    #18

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    THEREALMRPENN Report

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    Harlan Bleiler
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My daughter is almost 10 and luckily she still reaches for my hand. I’m not ready for that day either.

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    Each child is unique, and they often prove it by coming up with brilliant and humorous ideas that immediately put a smile on their parents’ faces. "Children have no social filter and are wonderfully curious," Jade explained. "They see the world in a completely different way. Everything is a question, adventure, or story. The WHY questions drive parents doolally, but I think as adults we stop asking so much because our brains are too busy with work, grocery shopping, bills, and keeping down Cholesterol."

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    If there’s one widely accepted truth, it’s that we were more creative and honest as children. When asked whether we can somehow rejuvenate these qualities, Jade told us that creativity isn’t magic. "It’s a skill that children cultivate more than adults, I think. I don’t have time to make rock pets and give them each a name, but my four-year-old does, and that’s awesome."

    As much as these munchkins are clever, they can also come up with questions and ideas that catch their parents off guard. But however odd their words may seem to us, you should avoid mocking your kids and laughing at them. "I make sure to be playful and kind-laugh with my children and encourage them to laugh when they say something funny too," Jade added. "Create a connection. Be careful to say things like 'You are so funny!' instead of 'That is silly,' as words have weight. It is important to boost a child’s confidence and reinforce that humor and joy."

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    Any mom and dad out there want what’s best for their kids. This usually means working on boundaries and teaching them what’s right and wrong. After all, there’s a difference between a lighthearted joke and one that’s aimed to hurt a person’s feelings. "Sometimes they are doing something funny that is not safe or saying something funny that is not kind or making a joke at the expense of someone else. Then I think parents need to set boundaries for themselves and their children. Sometimes you will need to carefully explain why a joke or situation isn’t funny," she added.

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    #25

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    BunAndLeggings Report

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    Gladys Hayes Southerland
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, if she's been a good girl, I'd probably go for it since l admire her chutzpah. That's also probably why l ended doing things that l wondered "how did l get talked into this when l thought l said No???"

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    #27

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    gabrielroth Report

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    censor
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    at which point you lose interest in playing chess with the little bugger.

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    But that doesn’t mean that bending over backward to raise their little ones to be kind human beings should hold them back from having a great time too. Jade told us that when your child comes up with shenanigans that are funny and harmless, laugh with your child. "Enjoy them. My partner told me the other day to stop picking up the phone to film it and just enjoy the moment, which is good advice in today’s social media-heavy world," she concluded.

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    #28

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    StruggleDisplay Report

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    James016
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it moves but it shouldn't: Duck Tape. If it doesn't move and it should: WD40

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    #29

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    mom_tho Report

    #33

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    copymama Report

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    Robin DJW
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My parents forbade us to observe mother's day and father's day, saying that the whole concept was made up by Madison Avenue to help retailers overcome the bad months between christmases. Instead, they taught us by example that a spontaneous "I love you" was a better gift than all the candy and roses in the world. And it was appreciated on all days, not just once a year.

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    #36

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    OyVeyLady Report

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    Nathaniel
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Trying to put the fun in funeral. Now where is that ball pit and bouncy castle?

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    #37

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    TheCatWhisprer Report

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    jjdubs W
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not sure when this stops, though my 24 y.o. isn't nearly as condescending as she once was.

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    #38

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    mommy_cusses Report

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    GUN SLINGER
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My son was 5 and I was a deputy and decided to teach him how to call 911,so I called dispatch and told them my plan so that he would no how to give them info,so when they had a calm moment they called and told me to have him call.call gose as if he's calling in that the house is on fire,he gives the address and our name and the dispatcher asks him if he can give a description of the house and he says its the one with flames coming out of it hello.needless to say the dispatcher and I both lost it,and then my son looks at me and says,you really work with people like that

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    #39

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    aubreyhirsch Report

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    GoddessOdd
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I grew up in the time when there wasn't really money to cater to kids... the rules most of my friends and I lived by was "Eat it. Or don't eat."

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    #40

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    LizerReal Report

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    L.A. Trefry
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nah, the baby pic is there to remind parents to buy more alcohol because they'll need it.

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    #41

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    kevinthedad Report

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    Paul C.
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Went and watched my nephew and was so proud as he raced towards goal, yards ahead of the defence, only for one of his shin pads to fall out and him go back and pick it up.

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    #48

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    MumInBits Report

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    Aboredpanda
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought for a second it was the mom who said that to "perfect mom", then skipped off whith her kid. Which would've been perfect! 😹

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    #49

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    mom_tho Report

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    Jason Marin
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was a kid, my mom thought I never used soap because when she touched it, the soap was dry. Thank goodness for body wash.

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    #52

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    notmythirdrodeo Report

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    Kristi White
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My son when he was a kid... No one else understood what having "potato" on his French fries meant but his dad and I 🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️

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    #53

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    StruggleDisplay Report

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    JK Rowling
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    To be fair, I just woke up and do not want your pungent breath all over my face. (Love you, mom.)

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    #62

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    kevinthedad Report

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    jjdubs W
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Only for about 15 years per kid (so I recommend overlapping those 15 years)....

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    #65

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    Melchievous Report

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    #68

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    mahnamematt Report

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    censor
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You need to practice your dad stare. They're not scared enough.

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    #75

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    IDontSpeakWhine Report

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    censor
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    you have to get them to hold eye contact, and then say whatever you wanted to say, twice.

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    #76

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    AlixEHarrow Report

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    #79

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    daddygofish Report

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    #80

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    Frediculous Report

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    GoddessOdd
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I actually think this is a great way to teach privileged kids that they ARE privileged. My mom used to take us to the homeless shelter to get the same message across, but I like your way better.

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    #82

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    frynaomifry Report

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    Nathaniel
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As long as you don't think your'e in a Brazzers show.

    #83

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    clhubes Report

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    Nathaniel
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What demon is this? Not a child? Children want chocolate with spaghetti hoops.

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    #87

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    clhubes Report

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    #90

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    dadmann_walking Report

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    #91

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    HomeWithPeanut Report

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    Sharkie
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lolz. Kids I babysit have the same owl toy... but not the dentures... I on the other hand have multiple fake dentures...

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    #92

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    MommyCocktail Report

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    I'm.Just.A.Girl
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My daughter always announces "spoiler alert" and if I don't allow it, she will ask me every 5 minutes if she can tell me again.

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    #93

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    lmegordon Report

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    Weed in the Garden
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was a divorced and exhausted mother working two jobs when my seven year old daughter asked me if I liked being a Mommy. I was immediately wracked with guilt thinking of all the time we were missing out on to be together, days when I was cross or too busy to play, etc. I immediately lauched into all the wonderful things about being a mother, how much I loved her, and on and on and on. When I felt like I had reassured her and finally took a breath, I asked her why she asked me that question. She looked me dead in the eye, nodded her head and said she was just thinking about different career options.

    #94

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    clhubes Report

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    #96

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    SnarkyMommy78 Report

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    GoddessOdd
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My sister sent me a video of her grand kid in class... I can't imagine 22 kids in the same room.

    #97

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    simoncholland Report

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    Panda in the Fake South
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The thermostat. That is the moment I realized I had become a parent. When my kid changed the thermostat and I became enraged.

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    #98

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    Nazaninkavari Report

    #99

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    daisykpgardner Report

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    GoddessOdd
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My dad was a rocket scientist... I thought he'd be a big hit at career day, but another kid's dad managed an ice cream shop, so my dad was crushed.

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    #100

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    momlikethat1 Report

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    #101

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    LMemeit Report

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    #102

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    DevonESawa Report

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    Just a ray of f'ing sunshine
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I LOVE banana pancakes! My dad has always been "creative" with breakfast, so he tried Orange Juice pancakes once. Don't recommend 0/10.

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    #103

    Parenting-Tweets-June-2022

    dadmann_walking Report

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    Glitterati
    Community Member
    2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I like good natured eye roll parenting comments as much as the next person, but making public comment on your adolescent child’s body feels disloyal and disrespectful. If you want your child to trust you during a really sensitive time in their life then mocking them on twitter might not be the best plan. If I was that kid I’d be mortified.

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