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Things in life often change at a pace that is difficult for some people to catch up with; the things they used to enjoy back in the day no longer exist and what was customary became unacceptable all of a sudden. And while some things clearly changed for the better, others might leave some individuals perplexed, misunderstood, or even scolded.

Members of the ‘Ask Old People’ community on Reddit recently discussed instances of such change when one user asked them about things that were perfectly normal and acceptable when they were growing up, but would now be considered rude or boundary crossing. If you’re curious about the netizens’ observations, scroll down to find them on the list below and feel free to upvote those you can relate to or agree with the most.

#1

30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Playing by myself in the woods at a pretty young age.

wendyrc246 , iviphoto93 / Envato Report

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ॐBoyGanesh
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4 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My fondest memories were wandering around outside. At 8 years old riding my bmx bike to the “jumps,” building forts in the woods, exploring orchards, construction sites & dilapidated buildings. Which is why when we became parents, we moved to an off-grid location in the jungle on a very large but sparsely populated island. My 10yo is often out with his friends until just before sunset playing around in nature. Discovering on his own terms. Sure, he’s often home playing video games or occupied by screens, and of course he has his chores, homework & household participation. But mostly he’s being what was once a typical young boy, playing outside while there’s daylight, letting his sense of wonder & his imagination lead the way.

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    #2

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Possibly stopping in at a friend’s house unannounced. That used to be fairly common when everyone didn’t have a phone in his or her pocket.

    Eff-Bee-Exx , AlenaIvochkina / Envato Report

    #3

    TV Specials. Like The Wizard of Oz being broadcast once a year and made for TV movies and mini series that were outside of the normal schedule. Or when Schindler’s List was broadcast commercial free in the 90s.

    Also, scheduling your free time around a show you wanted to watch.

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    Comment Deleted
    Community Member
    4 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I miss this so much. It was fun going to work the next day and everyone was talking about the latest episode. Mini series were a huge deal. Cliff hangers and you had to wait for the new season. We had friends or family who might drop over to watch the latest episode. When I was in grade school we would beg my Mother to stay up late to watch the Carol Burnette show. Everything today is so solitary. The sense of community is lost.

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    #4

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today I worked as a temp a lot during the 90s. There were many offices that specified that women were to wear dresses or skirts only; not pants. That would not fly nowadays.

    Nice_Ad4063 , LightFieldStudios / Envato Report

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    Green Tree
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not just that but pantyhose, closed-toe shoes, a height limit on heels, no sleeveless tops, 'natural' makeup... I'm not that old and I remember a laundry list of rules from when I entered the office workforce.

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    #5

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Riding in the bed of a pickup truck, usually on the tire hub. My mom’s Eagle didn’t have seatbelts in the early 80s.

    life-is-satire , Mint_Images / Envato Report

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    The Other Guest
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I fully understand why it's banned, and agree that it's super dangerous. But damn, it was fun!

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    #6

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Kissing, hugging, or being forced to dance with a creepy relative.

    inky_bat , nd3000 / Envato Report

    #7

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Scolding someone else's child. I remember getting corrected by strangers.

    roytheodd , elenbessonova / Envato Report

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    Spencer's slave no longer
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did exactly this a wee while ago. A bunch of tweens were verbally harassing an older chap, calling him smelly, ugly, dirty etc. This chap was just sitting outside some shops minding his own business. Damn right I confronted them and I'd happily do it again if need be. Just because they're someone else's kids doesn't mean we should not call them out for their s.h.i.t.t.y behaviour.

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    #8

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today This may be hard to believe but when I started buying cigarettes in 1964 for 25 cents from a vending machine at the coin operated laundromat I often saw people, both men and women quietly sitting in their underwear reading magazines while their clothes were washing or drying. I do remember one guy in boxer shorts and shoes tap dancing. .

    anon , Mint_Images / Envato Report

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    Moltar
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I used to buy my Moms smokes with a note at the gas station, and also candy for me.

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    #9

    When I was a kid, if a neighborhood kid was playing outside at someones house and got dirty, they got put in the tub and scrubbed down by the matriarch of the house. Their clothes were also thrown in the washer and dryer. No one thought anything of this.

    Also, the women in my neighborhood fed lunch to whatever kids their own was hanging with that day.

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    #10

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Pulling out a cigarette and lighting it without asking if it's okay.

    MindingMine , AllaRudenko / Envato Report

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    Mia Black
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am not 40 yet and grew up with trains where only one of the wagons was for nonsmoking. It was a pain to squeeze into full wagons just to avoid the smoke or worse: to squeeze into a full wagon of workers smokers....

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    #11

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today All my parents' friends used to give me a spanking for each year on my birthday. Does anyone else remember this? Birthday spankings? So weird.

    audvisial , wolfhound9111 / Envato Report

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    Cat Chat
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I remember having to go through entire "spanking machines" where everyone lined up and you crawled through on your knees. Birthday spankings were just a little pat, not like punishment spankings. But still not something people could get away with today.

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    #12

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today When I was a executive assistant I was called "the girl" when my boss was referring me to clients. "I'll have the girl write up the papers. Also, i was 38 at the time.

    Fuzzzer777 , prathanchorruangsak / Envato Report

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    The Phantom Stranger
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This was probably sexiest, but not intentionally demeaning. My grandfather sometimes referred to his secretary as "His girl", but it was meant respectfully, as in, "Let me ask my girl, she's the one who knows everything around here." In private conversation, he probably called her Ms. Tudor. I can't imagine a circumstance in which he would have called her "the girl" though, that's not just demeaning but dehumanizing.

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    #13

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Smoking indoors.

    somekindofhat , rushay1977 / Envato Report

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    Libstak
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Smoking at work, you just grabbed an ash tray from the stationery cupboard when you started a new job as part of your desk top needs.

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    #14

    Telling other peoples kids off, I grew up in a village and everyone yelled at you if you were naughty. If I'd complained to my dad that Mrs next door had told me off he'd have said serves you right. That said Mrs next door wouldn't have told my dad on me.

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    Mia Black
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    4 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe we as a society should correct or outcall incorrect behaviour more.... So many people today don't know basic manners and boundaries. Edit: now I sound like an old hag but I hear it from people in their 30ies (like me) to older ones....

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    #15

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today I was on a job interview in the 70s. The man said, 'Why should I hire you? I will train you. Then you will get married and have babies."

    I was a college student looking before graduating.

    HighPriestess__55 , Tima Miroshnichenko / Pexels Report

    #16

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Asking people when they were going to get pregnant. Or why they didn’t have any kids yet.

    StuffonBookshelfs , zamrznutitonovi / Envato Report

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    Sue Denham
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Best answer to this i ever heard was my SIL to her aunt "We're still practising,".

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    #17

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Inviting the neighborhood children into your home. (1960’s and 70’s) On Halloween some people would ask you to step in the house to show an elderly family member your costume. It was very awkward . We also had a very religious elderly woman across the street, ( empty nester married couple) she held a Bible school every Wednesday after school for neighborhood kids to attend. We would go into her downstairs family room and she would show a film strip, give a felt board presentation, sing some songs. Then we would make a craft project and have a snack. Each week we were given a Bible verse to memorize and if you could recite it, you got a small prize. We were there about an hour and a half. This woman really enjoyed doing this, the parents didn’t seem to mind either. Actually, it was the most religious exposure I had as a child. She was a very kind and sweet woman, and well liked in the neighborhood. This would NEVER happen today.

    Lainarlej , uraneva / Envato Report

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    Jaymi Leigh
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I feel like both of these things are still pretty plausible. We are often invited in the entryway when I take my kids trick or treating. The other thing sounds like a homeschool deal for religion. Not that much of a stretch.

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    #18

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today The big paddle that one of the teachers would posses that would be used on your hind quarters at their whim. No parent permission needed.

    OICGraffiti , LightFieldStudios / Envato Report

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    Trillian
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lol no that was outlawed in 1973. My mother would have personally strangled any teacher who had tried to hit us anyway.

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    #19

    Bullying. Not only was it acceptable, but it was sometimes encouraged by teachers and parents because it would “toughen you up.” I was a victim of extreme bullying. It gave me CPTSD, actually. And I think it contributed to some of my health problems as an adult. Yet, when my mom tried to get help for me at school and from the bullies’ parents, they told her that kids will be kids and she had to stop trying to fight my battles for me. Now? I asked my young cousin if there were anti-bullying rules at her school (middle school) and she said yes, but they didn’t really need the rule because nobody really bullied anyone anyway. She literally thinks that kids naturally don’t bully other kids! Because the rule worked! It’s mind blowing to me. I wonder who I’d be if we’d had that rule.

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    Manana Man
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I suppose locations vary but I think bullying is worse now. Years ago you never heard of a kid commiting suicide. And kids are great as using the internet for bullying.

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    #20

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Cutting through our neighborhood backyards. We all did it. Until we got into Highschool and cars became the norm. You might get hurt today.

    dvoigt412 , westend61 / Envato Report

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    #21

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today I’ve been told that women were expected to wear “foundation garments” at work, and if they didn’t, then they might get reprimanded. I’m talking about longline bras and girdles.

    In the 80s, one of my friends got sent to the office for not wearing a bra to high school.

    smartbiphasic , romankosolapov / Envato Report

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    Shannimal
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I got made fun of in 6th grade (I was 11) by fellow girls for not wearing a bra at my private catholic school. I didn't have anything for a bra to hold!! I still barely do! I cried, my poor mom had to buy me a training bra for no reason.

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    #22

    Elderly men innocently chatting up random kids in the streets. My father used to do that, and was heartbroken when it became unacceptable behavior.

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    #23

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today We let dogs poop everywhere and never picked it up.

    wawa2022 , Satura_ / Envato Report

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    leendadll
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It turned white due to calcium from all the ground bones in it. (True story)

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    #24

    My childhood gp making consistent remarks to our mom about how my dad better get a stick to beat the boys back as my sister and I began to grow up.  


    before anyone goes there, no he wasn't a closeted pedophile.  he had no personal lasciviousness to him at all.  that kind of objectification was simply considered a "normal" way to compliment girl children in the 70's.   


    to be fair, I'm not sure it's over.  in the 90's I was going down the throats of people who tried to make similar kinds of remarks about my son within his hearing.  .

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    Cat Chat
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Another way to say the same thing was "boys are going to be beating down the door when she's ready to date"

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    #25

    Definitely dropping by people's houses. My dad was a Boy Scout leader (my brother was a boy scout) and we had teenage boys dropping by to ogle my two oldest sisters all the time (under the guise of a family visit :-)).

    The neighborhood was full of kids and we always stopped by rather than calling. You'd knock on the door and call out, "Can Gigglefester come out and play?".

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    notlikeyou1971
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When us Gen X kids were younger we always showed up at friend's houses to ask if a kid could come outside to play.

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    #26

    Teachers laying their hands on kids. In first grade my teacher grabbed me by the ponytail and dragged me backwards across the room. In second grade after a couple tardys my teacher grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me.

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    Remi (He/Him)
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Afaik the teacher who strangled a student in the hallway in front of everyone in our school didn't get any reprimands mainly because it was his own son...

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    #27

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Kids mixing alcoholic drinks for guests at home.

    Writes4Living , LightFieldStudios / Envato Report

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    NapQueen
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or even going to the shops to buy alcohol and cigarettes on behalf of your parents....

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    #28

    Definitely thought of now in a bad light- catcalling women when they walk by.

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    #29

    Asking someone if they “went to church” upon meeting them. Had to explain to my grandma that doing so would lose me relatability/trust FAST among my age group because that question is no longer kind when asked.

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    Rachel
    Community Member
    4 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is still a thing in the US South. It blows my mind but not in a good way.

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    #30

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Within extended families, asking another adult member when they were finding a marriage prospect, getting married, having children etc.

    JustAnnesOpinion , monkeybusiness / Envato Report

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    Mia Black
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is still around sadly. I was asked nearly every phone talk for 4-6 years into my now (18year) relationship for kids although I made it clear from the first moment that the decision to be childfree stands since I was a child. I think they never got it. Same with alcohol "you still don't drink alcohol? But this one tastes good. Won't you try it?".... Exhausting!!!

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    #31

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Touching strangers. So, for instance, if you were walking behind a woman and saw her tag out on her top, or her collar rucked up, you would just reach out and fix it.

    ViCalZip , LightFieldStudios / Envato Report

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Where and when was this ever acceptable behaviour?! It happened to me as a child by people who knew me, but I've never seen it done to an adult, let alone by a stranger.

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    #32

    1. More blatant gender discrimination.

    2. Commenting on people's bodies.

    3. Forcing children to eat all the food on their plates.

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    #33

    Strangers coming up to New mothers and saying "What a cute baby! May I hold them?".

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    Christina Born
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When my oldest boy was about 2wk old we went to a truck stop to eat one night. There was a giant burly trucker eating with some friends at the table next to us that kept looking over at us. It was starting to weird me out. Then he came over and said he was a sucker for babies and asked very nicely if he could hold him. We let him and that big burly guy turned into the biggest teddy with the biggest smile on his face. He stood there and rocked that teeny tiny baby for a good 10min. Totally made his day, you could tell. And honestly? Made mine too. It was just so sweet the way he held my baby so gently and cooed at him.

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    #34

    I had this tall guy in my drama club who just came over to me (shortish girl) and picked me up and hugged me. It wasn’t considered rude at the time, but it pissed me off and I’m still mad he did it.

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    #35

    Call repeatedly until someone answered. No answering machines. Smoking in other's house. My parents didn't smoke but had ashtrays in almost every room. No one asked, they just lit up.

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    El Dee
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I stopped smoking decades ago but I keep ashtrays for guests, still. I like to be a good host..

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    #36

    Commenting on stranger’s bodies in a rude way to friends or family, or describing someone with words about their body. Like, see that fat bald guy over there? Or that little fat kid is so funny! Or, omg that boy has so many pimples it’s gross. This kind of thing was normal in the 80s and 90s. As a teenager, being fat was the worst thing you could do. It was awful.

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    sidda7
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My Southern in-laws do this. They even refer to any person remotely Asian looking as "Orientals," oof.

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    #37

    Talking to/playing with unrelated children you found in park or playground.

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    Jaymi Leigh
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is still a thing. My kids do this all the time, it's called making friends.

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    #38

    I feel like there is more boundary crossing today than previously. As a general rule I was taught to not ask or talk about medical issues or mental health issues or money or ask who one is voting for, how someone died, if they’re transgender (you just assumed based on clothing. If a male looking person was wearing a dress and makeup, we’d assume she wants to be known as a she and it’s impolite to ask). I was taught to never go to someone’s house without calling ahead.

    I think there are more physical boundaries now though. Less hugs. Less putting arms around each other. Less unasked for massages. Less older women grabbing a 12 year old girls chest to see how big she’s gotten (I hated that).

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What?! Grabbing a child's chest to see how big she has gotten has never been acceptable.

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    #39

    Black/brown face (actually never done by anyone I knew with the intent of belittling people), copying peoples’ accents, telling jokes based on nationalities.

    Also, groups of kids sitting on some stranger’s curb or front lawn.

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    #40

    30 Things That Were Considered Normal Back In The Day, But Would Be Frowned Upon Today Phoning someone without a heads-up text first. I text with my sons all day long. But if one of them calls me out of the blue, my anxiety goes sky-high. It has to be something awful.

    webdoyenne , bilyanas1 / Envato Report

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    Mrs Irish Mom
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Im 40 and i ring ppl out of the blue without a heads up and i also answer every call even if its private or a number i dont know, maybe im just weird or nosy 🤷

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    #41

    If you're curious, go (re)watch Madmen. The casual sexism, smoking, smoking indoors, day drinking &c were on point.

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    cerinamroth
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    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even though all of that is within my living memory, the thing that took my breath away was when they are out for a picnic and they just shake out the picnic rug and leaving all the rubbish behind on the grass. I don't remember that ever happening!

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    #42

    Fighting.
    Playground fights. Rival neighborhood kids fights. Bar fights. Parents fighting at little league. Thursday night scraps outside the bowling alley.

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    #43

    "Girlwatching".

    Straight men used to just sit outside and stare at any young woman close enough to be visible, and they could spend hours doing nothing else. I have no idea if they thought the young women liked it, or just didn't care if the young women liked it.

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    Ambrosius
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Still happens where I live. Men sitting in cafes and loudly commenting every female that passes by.

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    #44

    Well, there were a lot of words, which were not considered bad. Most of the people did not know, that they were offensive to others, they just grew up with it and had no alternative word in their vocabulary.

    On the other side, you were a social outcast for some time, if a "s**t" left your mouth. Swearing was not OK.

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    El Dee
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Language changes over time, always has. For example the word 'idiot' was once a medical term. People used it offensively so the terminology changed. More recently the British Spastic Foundation had to change their name due to the misuse of the word. This will keep happening as long as people are AHs and use words in an offensive way until the word has to be changed..

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    #45

    Calling women dames, chicks, broads.

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    #46

    A lot of gen x and millennial people never heard about minstrel shows until like 2005 or so; the medium had been entirely memory holed by our grandparents, so we just thought that blackface was vaguely disrespectful without understanding that it was deliberately derogative and denigrating. There aren’t any pictures of me personally in blackface, but just because it was easier to dress up as Wayne’s Gretzky than as Michael Jordan.

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    Slapdash1
    Community Member
    4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A lot of gen x and millenial people didn't hear about minsrel shows because they're an american thing. Also? About 80% of the world cant be quiltripped into them because the didnt do them

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