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“I Honestly Don’t Really Care”: Person Refuses To Give Up Their Day Off To Play A Video Game
We’re all entitled to days off. Whether you’re going on your honeymoon or staying home to relax in bed and read books all day, what you do with your free time is none of your employer’s concern. But unfortunately, when colleagues who didn’t plan ahead want the same day off, they might begin weighing who “deserves” to have a holiday more.
Below, you’ll find a story that was recently shared on the “Am I the [Jerk]?” subreddit, detailing how one worker has had to defend their right to a day off, as well as some of the replies invested readers have left on their post.
RELATED:
After waiting years for a new video game to come out, this employee was sure to request the release day off
Image credits: GaudiLab (not the actual photo)
However, once colleagues found out why they wouldn’t be working, they soon found themselves defending their right to take a free day
Image credits: zelda
Image credits: u/throwaway193749372
Paid time off is a benefit that all employees should be able to enjoy
Image credits: Tony Schnagl (not the actual photo)
As we all know, paid time off is one of the most valuable benefits a company can provide for its employees. The United States is the only developed nation in the world that does not mandate that employers provide at least some paid time off to employees every year, but according to Zippia, almost all companies do have some sort of PTO policy in place. “81.5% of private industry employees have access to paid vacation time, with that number scaling up to 92% for employees at companies of 500+ workers and scaling down to 71% for employees who work at companies with 1-49 workers,” they explain on their site. And it’s understandable for employers to offer their teams paid days off, as it benefits both the company and the workers.
Zippia notes that PTO provides employees with flexibility in choosing their own free time, boosts workers productivity when they’re allowed time to relax, gives workers the opportunity to save up days for long trips, builds trust between workers and their employers, accommodates a variety of reasons why employees might need a day off and provides privacy since workers should not need to explain why they are using their PTO. Well, it should provide privacy, but unfortunately, in this case, word spread around the office quickly. PTO also benefits employers, as it has been proven to increase company morale and minimize absenteeism.
It can be essential for maintaining a healthy work-life balance
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
Employees typically only need to request their paid time off at least 2 days in advance, unless they have chosen a coveted time when many workers would like to take a free day. And one of the great things about PTO is that all employees are entitled to it. Typically, it takes time to accumulate these paid days off, for example, an employee who has been at the company for 1-2 years might have earned about 18 days off. But aside from how many years a team member has been in service, everyone is equally entitled to days off. Parents do not deserve them any more than child-free individuals, and it should not make any difference to a company whether or not the employee plans to take a weekend trip or stay at home resting and watching Netflix all day.
Studies have shown that breaks from work are necessary for our mental and physical health. People who take vacations have lower stress, less risk of heart disease, a better outlook on life, and more motivation to achieve their goals, Dr. Kathryn Isham at Allina Health notes. And while 55% of PTO a year goes unused in the United States, it’s crucial for employees to ensure that they use the days off they have earned. Burnout is real, and enjoying a day off every now and then is essential for keeping our minds and bodies functioning in peak condition. Plus, we all deserve to enjoy our lives, and if that requires spending a day at home playing video games every now and then, so be it!
But one of the most important aspects of PTO is that employees are not required to disclose why they’re taking a day off
Image credits: LinkedIn Sales Navigator (not the actual photo)
One of the trademark aspects of a successful PTO policy is that employees are not required to disclose why they’re requesting a day off. They have earned that time to do with what they please, and unless they’ve become sick overnight and weren’t able to provide adequate notice, it’s none of their employer’s business why they won’t be coming in. “We really need to normalize rest in the workplace, and not guilt people into feeling like if they take time off, they’re exhibiting laziness,” Keni Dominguez, a career coach and workplace culture strategist, told HuffPost. Guilt and pressure from peers at work are often the reasons why PTO goes unused, but it’s time for this toxic hustle culture to end.
We should have all learned as children that everyone is different, so judging others for making their own unique choices is a waste of time and energy. Thankfully, many readers assured this employee that they had done nothing wrong by standing their ground and defending their day off, but sadly, this is not an isolated incident in the workplace. We would love to hear your thoughts on the story below, pandas. Do you think this person was right to keep their free day, or would you have been sacrificed the time off to give it to a colleague? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda article discussing the importance of healthy vacation days, we recommend reading this piece next!
Readers assured the employee that they had done nothing wrong, noting that they are always entitled to a day off
Some even shared similar stories of frustrating experiences at work
What do you think ?
Stacey Rae 1 year ago
And this is why we don't tell people why we book days off. None of their business.
Anyone-for-tea? 1 year ago
It’s hard though isn’t it, not to mention something like this, especially if you’ve been waiting 5 yrs for it? I would be equally excited for the new Elder Scrolls, but I don’t know if I would be able to resist the peer pressure to not swap. I’m full of admiration for people who can separate their personal and business selves like this. I don’t work through illness so I am out of practice!
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Rayven 1 year ago
Let me see if I got this straight... Instead of the coworker taking "no" for an answer and trying to ask other coworkers for assistance, they tell the other coworkers that the OP is an AH. Seems legit. It's sad that people can't simply say "no" without getting questioned, insulted, argued with, etc., anymore. The OP said "no" and it should've been respected.
ThatG 1 year ago
“Hello HR…I’d like to report a case of employee harassment thanks.”
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Florence O'Grady 1 year ago
OP asked for one day off months ago. He planned ahead like you're supposed to. This woman who did not plan ahead, like a mature adult should, did not. Wants OP to give up his planned day off for her. The answer is, rightfully, NO!!! NO!!! NO!!!
Nonya Business 1 year ago
Right?!? The date of Mother's Day 2023 was announced in 1914, so Coworker had time to plan. It is never okay to encourage a hostile working environment, even if the request was to let her have the day to care for young children while their caregiver is in critical condition.
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Sonja 1 year ago
I'd think differently if it was a once in a lifetime emergency she couldn't have planned beforehand but even then Id expect her to ask around and not just fixate on one co-worker who she thinks doesn't deserve their day off for whatever reason. I really dislike people like that! I had a colleague pestering me in 2021 to let them have my time off over Christmas because she had kids and I don't. She prodded and pestered and even tried the I am Christian and you aren't argument although she also doesn't go to church and everyone knew it was not about religious accommodation, the Christmas weekend was free for everyone, she just didn't want to work the week after. But I stood my ground and for the better. It was the last Christmas I celebrated with my mom who died last year. And yes, she was Christian even of I'm not. Luckily I live in Germany and time off can't be easily cancelled by the employer, so while our boss gave me some passive aggressive comments too they couldn't make me trade.
Two_rolling_black_eyes 1 year ago
Good companies accommodate emergency leave regardless of the pre-requested PTO schedule. You can't plan when mom is going to get sick. If you just want to go visit mom, that is not an emergency and your time is not more valuable than your co-workers.
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whineygingercat 1 year ago
Your co-worker's lack of timely planning does not constitute an emergency on your part. This is not a "you" problem. This is a "them" problem. As far as the reason you took time off, that's not her business.
whineygingercat 1 year ago
Also, mother's day is the 2nd Sunday in May, EVERY year. Your co-worker could've put in the request as soon as the system would allow it.
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Tamra 1 year ago
Is there some sort of rising tide of entitlement these days, or does it just seem more prominent because of the internet? The audacity of some people...damn.
- 1 year ago
Entitlement has always been around, whether it was based on social class, race, gender, or other identity marker.
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Michael MacKinnon 1 year ago (edited)
This consistent pattern, which I think is only a US thing, in which people get asked to trade off their time off for someone else's...is just bizarre. You put your request to your management. They approve it. End of story and nobody else's business. They want to get a leave day, they can put a request to your management. And, if management really want to eat one low productivity day, they can approve that request too. If your management routinely uses this as an excuse to pit one employee against another, maybe it's time to find new management.
GFSTaylor 1 year ago
I think the general lack of worker's rights in the USA contributes to the issue. If you only get 2 weeks a year, and very limited sick/parental leave, then those few days become very precious and employees are more likely to squabble over who gets particularly popular dates - everything is less flexible. The widespread culture that disencourages employees from taking vacation also means people may feel the need to 'justify' why they want vacation. Taking time to play, or to pursue a hobby, may be seen as selfish, and not as 'worthwhile' as a family event.
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Paul Rabit 1 year ago
As a massive Zelda fan myself, I hope OP was able to put this drama aside and enjoy TOTK yesterday!
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 1 year ago
Ik someone who's been so excited for this game and he's been on about it for forever
DBear 1 year ago
Okay so although I normally have no sympathy for video game geeks you still have the right to ask for any day off you want. The fact that as a veteran I have to request Veterans Day off irritates me but I still do it every year. But whatever the reason you shouldn't have to justify your request.
Kamis Dewey 1 year ago
Mother’s Day was announced over 100 years before the release date of Tears of the Kingdom was announced. If it was that important she could have requested that time off, like…. ANY TIME.
Matthew Daubenmire 1 year ago
So completely NTA. What you do on your time, is none of her business!
SillyPandaBunny 1 year ago
And this is the reason I tell no one why I take off the random days that I request. I submit my days off list months in advance. Sometimes it’s planned mental health days, sometimes I want to make a long weekend of it and rarely it’s to plan for an actual holiday but I take the time to plan ahead. People need to stop looking at why someone is taking off and just accept they have taken off.
Bonnie Boas 1 year ago
I’m a mom. I have two kids and one on the way. I’ve never in 14 years taken a Friday off for Mothers Day, which is on Sunday. People need to get real-the coworker doesn’t care about Mothers Day either, she just wanted that day off.
Maggie Hood 1 year ago
Do I care more about family than a video game? Of course. But do I care about some random coworkers family more than my own hobby? No.
Linda Perotti 1 year ago
Yeah NTA. If you scheduled time for something that you want. And yup your co-workers family is NOT your problem. I think that entitled rude co-workers should be reported and reprimand.
CatLady 1 year ago
Since when do people with families matter more than those who don't? My last boss excused paying me less when I was more qualified and did more work than my male colleague because he "had a family" to support. Um, then why didn't he get better qualifications? Why did I have to make do with less? I'd probably give up PTO for a coworker whose mother had died or something, but not because they forgot to book travel time and figured it was more important than my time.
Liesl English 1 year ago (edited)
I love the story about taking a week off for Skyrim. Excessive? Maybe. But taking a week off for travel is also technically excessive, but people would be more understanding of that. Either way, it's nobody's business. Definitely correct that the lesson is just not to share this stuff at work. Sadly.
Kevin Felton 1 year ago
Can you say "hostile work environment" boys and girls? Good, I knew that you could. Yeah, it's time to go to HR.
Nice Beast Ludo 1 year ago
Ughh!! The AUDACITY of people!I'm not even a gamer but I'm going to equate it to when the new Harry Potter books came out. I stayed in for the weekend and read it all at once. I was REALLY excited more so than for a vacation, which one can take at any time. These people are unreal and don't want to imagine your chuldfreelife might just be more fulfilling than theirs is. Shame on them even more for having kids and not planning ahead. You only are planning for yourself and managed to request off and they are planning for themselves and their family and still didn't manage to request the time off so it must not have been that important. It only became important when they were jealous that a child free co worker got a day off that they feel more entitled to.
Channo Sagara 1 year ago
personally idk why op booked a day off because botw took at least month of my life lol. It's impossible to graze the surface in a day, but people booked days off for stupider reasons -like for furry animal costume convention or whatnot. Whatever floats your boats, guys. Just because she's into family gatherings, not videogames, doesn't mean she can bully coworker who do. You can take days off to go to kite conventions or idk bird watching. I'm sorry op work with people who cannot appreciate videogames.
D. Pitbull 1 year ago
From a former (might be getting back to it if the industry changes) Disability Case Manager: NTA ... Confidentiality is a 'thing'... does his workplace know that? I remember so many (tersely polite) arguments with various managers and bosses of my clients repeating over and over "I can't disclose that to you. It would be a confidentiality issue. No. I can tell you their functionality, you do not get access to their medical record" The **ENTIRE INDUSTRY** of Disability Management is built on the fact that bosses can't wrap their heads around "their diagnosis isn't your business"... because there is so much judgment, petty 'revenge' and mocking - because, sorry to say... people are jackholes.
Greyson Christmas 1 year ago
F**k her and her family, the Zelda franchise is coveted and any nerd would need the time to cherish it.
Carol Edmonds 1 year ago
NTA, OP!! You requested the day off and sour grapes coworker was angry because she didn't put in for it sooner!!! Bravo for strategically planning to be able to get a 3-day weekend, AND not falling for your coworker's efforts at guilt-tripping you into caring about her opinion!!
Lace Neil 1 year ago
At one place I used to work, one of my days off fell on Christmas eve. Since the store was closing at 5pm anyway, I wasn't overly bothered whether I worked or not... until one of my coworkers started pressuring me to swap with her cuz, in her words, "I have a family and you don't, so you don't need to be off Christmas eve." Karen's pestering had the opposite effect to what she had intended. I dug my heels in and refused to swap, and took the day off. I was just so insulted by Karen saying that I didn't have a family just cuz I didn't have children. I had parents and siblings, I didn't just randomly pop into existence. I spent Christmas eve playing Crazy Taxi during the day, had dinner with my family and went to the pub with my two younger brothers in the evening.
Id row 1 year ago
Look, you decided to have a kid and you also decided not to put in time off for a day that occurs every single year. That is no one's problem but yours. I'm so sick of entitled parents thinking they're they only ones who matter because they chose to have a kid. Your kid, your problem, not mine.
S Mi 1 year ago
Time off is time off. Mother's day is booked years in advance, so it's not like it's an emergency situation. Also, also, maybe take Monday off to travel?
Susie Evans 1 year ago
I think I'd travel there on Saturday, probably less hectic than Friday and return on Monday, definitely less hectic.
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Adam S 1 year ago
Just to clarify, when the article says employees earn 18 days of PAID time off, they can still take more than that unpaid, right? Or are people expected to take less than two working weeks off in an entire year?!
Cara G 1 year ago
Presumably yes. An employee could take a day off and not be paid for it once their PTO is exhausted, meaning the day would go unpaid. But in the United States, that could push an employee into dangerous territory because they would either still need it approved by their manager (which in this case it wouldn't be since the company is limiting time off on that specific day), or call out sick on the day, both of which could be viewed as frequent absences and grounds for discipline or termination. And yes, two weeks vacation is the standard here if you are a full time employee. We have very few legal protections for workers.
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Craig Reynolds 1 year ago
They learned a valuable life lesson! Keep your mouth shut at work. NO ONE is your friend. Never reveal your plans, and never compromise for anyone. You do NOT owe any coworkers anything. They are paid to do a job, just like you. Their lousy planning is not your problem. I would report that coworker to HR for harassment. I would immediately hire a labor attorney if HR tried to side with them.
RandomlyRan Cannabis 1 year ago
My policy is "You can talk to me about anything work related, veer off that course and we will need to have a serious discussion about staying on task and not stealing by conversing about personal matters when the company pays us to solely be focused on business matters. If this impersonal nature offends you we can most certainly bring the issue up with Barb in HR." That usually does the trick. It's just a way I weed out the unnecessary chat. It's like asking "Do you smoke?" Replies are usually "Smoke what?"=I smoke weed "Yes."=They smoke cigs "NO." They really hate cigs. Just saves a whole lot of Convo.
Stupid and Worthless 1 year ago (edited)
Not your family, not your problem. It would be different if it was an emergency but this was just someone wanting that time to travel. Yes, it sucks not getting to see family, I haven't seen my family (been 5 years) since before my father died but no one cared when I wanted to go to his funeral or comfort my mom and brothers. No one cared that I haven't had a mother's day or would give my husband time off as I lost our child. Not your family, not your problem.
Dawnyducks 1 year ago
I legit booked this day off to have a long weekend with this game. I’ve been waiting like 6 years. No Zelda day off in 6 years that pretty good.
Kat Min 1 year ago
Well, giving up the day would have made him a saint, really. But we don't need to be saints and most certainly not for coworkers who don't respect our choices. She just wanted to visit her mother, something sshe couödl do at any weekend, really. She was not travelling to cure a lifethreatening disease or to have the last chance to say Good-bye to her dieing father. NTA
Mike Silvernail 1 year ago
Sometimes it's hard for me to always understand cuz nobody ever talks to me like that. Not one time have I ever had people talk to me like that. Idk who these delusional idiots r who think they can talk to someone any kind of way, or use extortion style tactics n not understand thats a felony. U CAN NOT USE EXTORTION TO GET WHAT U WANT NO MATTER WHAT ANYONE HAS EVER TOLD YOU!
John Smith 1 year ago
Entitled mother, nothing else. Having spawn does not mean you have more rights than child free people
CG 1 year ago (edited)
Definitely NTA. Co-Worker knew when Mother's Day was, and still failed to plan ahead to book that Friday off. Unless it's a major emergency involving the co-worker's mom, then that's not really OP's problem, who had the day booked off for months. And even if it was due to a family emergency, like a parent in the ER/dying, then 99.9% of employers would be willing to give them a day off (and not cancel a previously booked day off of another employee). You can't exactly plan for a medical emergency, or an accident, and most employers are accommodating.
Phil Vaive 1 year ago
One thing I learned was to never tell my coworkers why I needed a day off. It's none of their business, and it should have no bearing on whether or not someone gets a day off. I am also not a parent, and I was ALWAYS treated like my time mattered less than the people around me. And you know what? This lady has known when Mother's day would be not just for the whole year, but probably since she figured out how calendars work. It's on the second Sunday in May every single year. This guy only found out about the release date for the new Zelda game a few months ago. Not at ALL his fault. But yeah, don't tell people why you want time off EVER. None of their business.
greynoji 1 year ago
Sounds like she needs to unionize. More than harass a fellow worker to compromise, go for the people who are denying holiday in the first place.
Massimo Ferraresi 1 year ago
It appears strange to me that OP pays more attention to an hobby than the lady to her family...
CG 1 year ago (edited)
Not his family, not his problem. Especially when his co-worker waited until the last minute to try and get a day off booked.
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CG 1 year ago (edited)
While true that OP could have played the game any other day, the issue stems from the fact his co-worker did not plan ahead to book the Friday off first, despite Mother's Day being set at a consistent day every year (the second Sunday of May). And why should he help out if he did every on his part to get the day off approved (IE, being proactive and booking the day off months in advance), and the co-worker throws a hissy fit because she wasn't proactive?
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CG 1 year ago
I'll try and use a recent, but kind of crude comparison for this game. The new Zelda game is so anticipated and in high demand, that if you don't pick it up physically on release day (especially bright and early), it would be like trying to get toilet paper, disinfecting wipes, or hand sanitizer during the initial outbreak of COVID. You might be waiting a while for it. Granted, there are means of circumventing this issue (like Amazon or a digital download, but both have their own cons as well), but OP had the time off requested much sooner than his co-worker, and isn't required to say why they are taking time off.
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CG 1 year ago (edited)
And the co-worker isn't an A-Hole for prying a reason out of him (which he is not required to disclose, btw), and trying to get him to cancel something he had planned for months (which means that every co-worker in advance knew they would have one less person on hand for a while now) just because she "wanted to have an extra day to spend with her mom on Mother's Day weekend" at the last minute? I'm seeing more wrong on the co-worker's side, not OP's.
Load More Replies... CG 1 year ago (edited)
Kinda 50/50 on what you said. While yes, the gamer could have waited another day to play it, there's just this different feeling about playing a game on release date. But for a game as high in demand and in anticipation as this Zelda game, if they don't get it release day, they might have to wait many weeks to months to actually get the game if they purchased it from a store due to high sales volume (as someone who experienced this with Fire Emblem Awakening, I can understand where OP is coming from). That being said, Mother's Day is a day that is constant every year (the second Sunday of May), so OP's co-worker has had months to a year (depending on when the option to do so becomes available) to book the day off, but only chose to do it last minute. If they waited, that's the co-worker's problem, not OP's.
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ShellsBells 1 year ago
So you are saying that if a person requests one of their paid days off months in advance to do something they enjoy, they should give it up to someone else last minute to do something that they enjoy instead? So I just took time off to go to another country to go scuba diving starting Mother's Day. So should I cancel my trip because someone decided last minute that they have a mother to visit on said day? That they are more important than me because my mother passed away? Why is the last minute person more important than the person that planned in advance? And why does the person who has to visit their mother only do it on Mother's Day? Send a card, make a phone call, and plan to spend more than a weekend with your mother, as she should be more important than a Hallmark holiday that tells you when to visit.
Load More Replies... Stacey Rae 1 year ago
And this is why we don't tell people why we book days off. None of their business.
Anyone-for-tea? 1 year ago
It’s hard though isn’t it, not to mention something like this, especially if you’ve been waiting 5 yrs for it? I would be equally excited for the new Elder Scrolls, but I don’t know if I would be able to resist the peer pressure to not swap. I’m full of admiration for people who can separate their personal and business selves like this. I don’t work through illness so I am out of practice!
Load More Replies... Rayven 1 year ago
Let me see if I got this straight... Instead of the coworker taking "no" for an answer and trying to ask other coworkers for assistance, they tell the other coworkers that the OP is an AH. Seems legit. It's sad that people can't simply say "no" without getting questioned, insulted, argued with, etc., anymore. The OP said "no" and it should've been respected.
ThatG 1 year ago
“Hello HR…I’d like to report a case of employee harassment thanks.”
Load More Replies... Florence O'Grady 1 year ago
OP asked for one day off months ago. He planned ahead like you're supposed to. This woman who did not plan ahead, like a mature adult should, did not. Wants OP to give up his planned day off for her. The answer is, rightfully, NO!!! NO!!! NO!!!
Nonya Business 1 year ago
Right?!? The date of Mother's Day 2023 was announced in 1914, so Coworker had time to plan. It is never okay to encourage a hostile working environment, even if the request was to let her have the day to care for young children while their caregiver is in critical condition.
Load More Replies... Sonja 1 year ago
I'd think differently if it was a once in a lifetime emergency she couldn't have planned beforehand but even then Id expect her to ask around and not just fixate on one co-worker who she thinks doesn't deserve their day off for whatever reason. I really dislike people like that! I had a colleague pestering me in 2021 to let them have my time off over Christmas because she had kids and I don't. She prodded and pestered and even tried the I am Christian and you aren't argument although she also doesn't go to church and everyone knew it was not about religious accommodation, the Christmas weekend was free for everyone, she just didn't want to work the week after. But I stood my ground and for the better. It was the last Christmas I celebrated with my mom who died last year. And yes, she was Christian even of I'm not. Luckily I live in Germany and time off can't be easily cancelled by the employer, so while our boss gave me some passive aggressive comments too they couldn't make me trade.
Two_rolling_black_eyes 1 year ago
Good companies accommodate emergency leave regardless of the pre-requested PTO schedule. You can't plan when mom is going to get sick. If you just want to go visit mom, that is not an emergency and your time is not more valuable than your co-workers.
Load More Replies... whineygingercat 1 year ago
Your co-worker's lack of timely planning does not constitute an emergency on your part. This is not a "you" problem. This is a "them" problem. As far as the reason you took time off, that's not her business.
whineygingercat 1 year ago
Also, mother's day is the 2nd Sunday in May, EVERY year. Your co-worker could've put in the request as soon as the system would allow it.
Load More Replies... Tamra 1 year ago
Is there some sort of rising tide of entitlement these days, or does it just seem more prominent because of the internet? The audacity of some people...damn.
- 1 year ago
Entitlement has always been around, whether it was based on social class, race, gender, or other identity marker.
Load More Replies... Michael MacKinnon 1 year ago (edited)
This consistent pattern, which I think is only a US thing, in which people get asked to trade off their time off for someone else's...is just bizarre. You put your request to your management. They approve it. End of story and nobody else's business. They want to get a leave day, they can put a request to your management. And, if management really want to eat one low productivity day, they can approve that request too. If your management routinely uses this as an excuse to pit one employee against another, maybe it's time to find new management.
GFSTaylor 1 year ago
I think the general lack of worker's rights in the USA contributes to the issue. If you only get 2 weeks a year, and very limited sick/parental leave, then those few days become very precious and employees are more likely to squabble over who gets particularly popular dates - everything is less flexible. The widespread culture that disencourages employees from taking vacation also means people may feel the need to 'justify' why they want vacation. Taking time to play, or to pursue a hobby, may be seen as selfish, and not as 'worthwhile' as a family event.
Load More Replies... Paul Rabit 1 year ago
As a massive Zelda fan myself, I hope OP was able to put this drama aside and enjoy TOTK yesterday!
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 1 year ago
Ik someone who's been so excited for this game and he's been on about it for forever
DBear 1 year ago
Okay so although I normally have no sympathy for video game geeks you still have the right to ask for any day off you want. The fact that as a veteran I have to request Veterans Day off irritates me but I still do it every year. But whatever the reason you shouldn't have to justify your request.
Kamis Dewey 1 year ago
Mother’s Day was announced over 100 years before the release date of Tears of the Kingdom was announced. If it was that important she could have requested that time off, like…. ANY TIME.
Matthew Daubenmire 1 year ago
So completely NTA. What you do on your time, is none of her business!
SillyPandaBunny 1 year ago
And this is the reason I tell no one why I take off the random days that I request. I submit my days off list months in advance. Sometimes it’s planned mental health days, sometimes I want to make a long weekend of it and rarely it’s to plan for an actual holiday but I take the time to plan ahead. People need to stop looking at why someone is taking off and just accept they have taken off.
Bonnie Boas 1 year ago
I’m a mom. I have two kids and one on the way. I’ve never in 14 years taken a Friday off for Mothers Day, which is on Sunday. People need to get real-the coworker doesn’t care about Mothers Day either, she just wanted that day off.
Maggie Hood 1 year ago
Do I care more about family than a video game? Of course. But do I care about some random coworkers family more than my own hobby? No.
Linda Perotti 1 year ago
Yeah NTA. If you scheduled time for something that you want. And yup your co-workers family is NOT your problem. I think that entitled rude co-workers should be reported and reprimand.
CatLady 1 year ago
Since when do people with families matter more than those who don't? My last boss excused paying me less when I was more qualified and did more work than my male colleague because he "had a family" to support. Um, then why didn't he get better qualifications? Why did I have to make do with less? I'd probably give up PTO for a coworker whose mother had died or something, but not because they forgot to book travel time and figured it was more important than my time.
Liesl English 1 year ago (edited)
I love the story about taking a week off for Skyrim. Excessive? Maybe. But taking a week off for travel is also technically excessive, but people would be more understanding of that. Either way, it's nobody's business. Definitely correct that the lesson is just not to share this stuff at work. Sadly.
Kevin Felton 1 year ago
Can you say "hostile work environment" boys and girls? Good, I knew that you could. Yeah, it's time to go to HR.
Nice Beast Ludo 1 year ago
Ughh!! The AUDACITY of people!I'm not even a gamer but I'm going to equate it to when the new Harry Potter books came out. I stayed in for the weekend and read it all at once. I was REALLY excited more so than for a vacation, which one can take at any time. These people are unreal and don't want to imagine your chuldfreelife might just be more fulfilling than theirs is. Shame on them even more for having kids and not planning ahead. You only are planning for yourself and managed to request off and they are planning for themselves and their family and still didn't manage to request the time off so it must not have been that important. It only became important when they were jealous that a child free co worker got a day off that they feel more entitled to.
Channo Sagara 1 year ago
personally idk why op booked a day off because botw took at least month of my life lol. It's impossible to graze the surface in a day, but people booked days off for stupider reasons -like for furry animal costume convention or whatnot. Whatever floats your boats, guys. Just because she's into family gatherings, not videogames, doesn't mean she can bully coworker who do. You can take days off to go to kite conventions or idk bird watching. I'm sorry op work with people who cannot appreciate videogames.
D. Pitbull 1 year ago
From a former (might be getting back to it if the industry changes) Disability Case Manager: NTA ... Confidentiality is a 'thing'... does his workplace know that? I remember so many (tersely polite) arguments with various managers and bosses of my clients repeating over and over "I can't disclose that to you. It would be a confidentiality issue. No. I can tell you their functionality, you do not get access to their medical record" The **ENTIRE INDUSTRY** of Disability Management is built on the fact that bosses can't wrap their heads around "their diagnosis isn't your business"... because there is so much judgment, petty 'revenge' and mocking - because, sorry to say... people are jackholes.
Greyson Christmas 1 year ago
F**k her and her family, the Zelda franchise is coveted and any nerd would need the time to cherish it.
Carol Edmonds 1 year ago
NTA, OP!! You requested the day off and sour grapes coworker was angry because she didn't put in for it sooner!!! Bravo for strategically planning to be able to get a 3-day weekend, AND not falling for your coworker's efforts at guilt-tripping you into caring about her opinion!!
Lace Neil 1 year ago
At one place I used to work, one of my days off fell on Christmas eve. Since the store was closing at 5pm anyway, I wasn't overly bothered whether I worked or not... until one of my coworkers started pressuring me to swap with her cuz, in her words, "I have a family and you don't, so you don't need to be off Christmas eve." Karen's pestering had the opposite effect to what she had intended. I dug my heels in and refused to swap, and took the day off. I was just so insulted by Karen saying that I didn't have a family just cuz I didn't have children. I had parents and siblings, I didn't just randomly pop into existence. I spent Christmas eve playing Crazy Taxi during the day, had dinner with my family and went to the pub with my two younger brothers in the evening.
Id row 1 year ago
Look, you decided to have a kid and you also decided not to put in time off for a day that occurs every single year. That is no one's problem but yours. I'm so sick of entitled parents thinking they're they only ones who matter because they chose to have a kid. Your kid, your problem, not mine.
S Mi 1 year ago
Time off is time off. Mother's day is booked years in advance, so it's not like it's an emergency situation. Also, also, maybe take Monday off to travel?
Susie Evans 1 year ago
I think I'd travel there on Saturday, probably less hectic than Friday and return on Monday, definitely less hectic.
Load More Replies... Adam S 1 year ago
Just to clarify, when the article says employees earn 18 days of PAID time off, they can still take more than that unpaid, right? Or are people expected to take less than two working weeks off in an entire year?!
Cara G 1 year ago
Presumably yes. An employee could take a day off and not be paid for it once their PTO is exhausted, meaning the day would go unpaid. But in the United States, that could push an employee into dangerous territory because they would either still need it approved by their manager (which in this case it wouldn't be since the company is limiting time off on that specific day), or call out sick on the day, both of which could be viewed as frequent absences and grounds for discipline or termination. And yes, two weeks vacation is the standard here if you are a full time employee. We have very few legal protections for workers.
Load More Replies... Craig Reynolds 1 year ago
They learned a valuable life lesson! Keep your mouth shut at work. NO ONE is your friend. Never reveal your plans, and never compromise for anyone. You do NOT owe any coworkers anything. They are paid to do a job, just like you. Their lousy planning is not your problem. I would report that coworker to HR for harassment. I would immediately hire a labor attorney if HR tried to side with them.
RandomlyRan Cannabis 1 year ago
My policy is "You can talk to me about anything work related, veer off that course and we will need to have a serious discussion about staying on task and not stealing by conversing about personal matters when the company pays us to solely be focused on business matters. If this impersonal nature offends you we can most certainly bring the issue up with Barb in HR." That usually does the trick. It's just a way I weed out the unnecessary chat. It's like asking "Do you smoke?" Replies are usually "Smoke what?"=I smoke weed "Yes."=They smoke cigs "NO." They really hate cigs. Just saves a whole lot of Convo.
Stupid and Worthless 1 year ago (edited)
Not your family, not your problem. It would be different if it was an emergency but this was just someone wanting that time to travel. Yes, it sucks not getting to see family, I haven't seen my family (been 5 years) since before my father died but no one cared when I wanted to go to his funeral or comfort my mom and brothers. No one cared that I haven't had a mother's day or would give my husband time off as I lost our child. Not your family, not your problem.
Dawnyducks 1 year ago
I legit booked this day off to have a long weekend with this game. I’ve been waiting like 6 years. No Zelda day off in 6 years that pretty good.
Kat Min 1 year ago
Well, giving up the day would have made him a saint, really. But we don't need to be saints and most certainly not for coworkers who don't respect our choices. She just wanted to visit her mother, something sshe couödl do at any weekend, really. She was not travelling to cure a lifethreatening disease or to have the last chance to say Good-bye to her dieing father. NTA
Mike Silvernail 1 year ago
Sometimes it's hard for me to always understand cuz nobody ever talks to me like that. Not one time have I ever had people talk to me like that. Idk who these delusional idiots r who think they can talk to someone any kind of way, or use extortion style tactics n not understand thats a felony. U CAN NOT USE EXTORTION TO GET WHAT U WANT NO MATTER WHAT ANYONE HAS EVER TOLD YOU!
John Smith 1 year ago
Entitled mother, nothing else. Having spawn does not mean you have more rights than child free people
CG 1 year ago (edited)
Definitely NTA. Co-Worker knew when Mother's Day was, and still failed to plan ahead to book that Friday off. Unless it's a major emergency involving the co-worker's mom, then that's not really OP's problem, who had the day booked off for months. And even if it was due to a family emergency, like a parent in the ER/dying, then 99.9% of employers would be willing to give them a day off (and not cancel a previously booked day off of another employee). You can't exactly plan for a medical emergency, or an accident, and most employers are accommodating.
Phil Vaive 1 year ago
One thing I learned was to never tell my coworkers why I needed a day off. It's none of their business, and it should have no bearing on whether or not someone gets a day off. I am also not a parent, and I was ALWAYS treated like my time mattered less than the people around me. And you know what? This lady has known when Mother's day would be not just for the whole year, but probably since she figured out how calendars work. It's on the second Sunday in May every single year. This guy only found out about the release date for the new Zelda game a few months ago. Not at ALL his fault. But yeah, don't tell people why you want time off EVER. None of their business.
greynoji 1 year ago
Sounds like she needs to unionize. More than harass a fellow worker to compromise, go for the people who are denying holiday in the first place.
Massimo Ferraresi 1 year ago
It appears strange to me that OP pays more attention to an hobby than the lady to her family...
CG 1 year ago (edited)
Not his family, not his problem. Especially when his co-worker waited until the last minute to try and get a day off booked.
Load More Replies... CG 1 year ago (edited)
While true that OP could have played the game any other day, the issue stems from the fact his co-worker did not plan ahead to book the Friday off first, despite Mother's Day being set at a consistent day every year (the second Sunday of May). And why should he help out if he did every on his part to get the day off approved (IE, being proactive and booking the day off months in advance), and the co-worker throws a hissy fit because she wasn't proactive?
Load More Replies... CG 1 year ago
I'll try and use a recent, but kind of crude comparison for this game. The new Zelda game is so anticipated and in high demand, that if you don't pick it up physically on release day (especially bright and early), it would be like trying to get toilet paper, disinfecting wipes, or hand sanitizer during the initial outbreak of COVID. You might be waiting a while for it. Granted, there are means of circumventing this issue (like Amazon or a digital download, but both have their own cons as well), but OP had the time off requested much sooner than his co-worker, and isn't required to say why they are taking time off.
Load More Replies... CG 1 year ago (edited)
And the co-worker isn't an A-Hole for prying a reason out of him (which he is not required to disclose, btw), and trying to get him to cancel something he had planned for months (which means that every co-worker in advance knew they would have one less person on hand for a while now) just because she "wanted to have an extra day to spend with her mom on Mother's Day weekend" at the last minute? I'm seeing more wrong on the co-worker's side, not OP's.
Load More Replies... CG 1 year ago (edited)
Kinda 50/50 on what you said. While yes, the gamer could have waited another day to play it, there's just this different feeling about playing a game on release date. But for a game as high in demand and in anticipation as this Zelda game, if they don't get it release day, they might have to wait many weeks to months to actually get the game if they purchased it from a store due to high sales volume (as someone who experienced this with Fire Emblem Awakening, I can understand where OP is coming from). That being said, Mother's Day is a day that is constant every year (the second Sunday of May), so OP's co-worker has had months to a year (depending on when the option to do so becomes available) to book the day off, but only chose to do it last minute. If they waited, that's the co-worker's problem, not OP's.
Load More Replies... ShellsBells 1 year ago
So you are saying that if a person requests one of their paid days off months in advance to do something they enjoy, they should give it up to someone else last minute to do something that they enjoy instead? So I just took time off to go to another country to go scuba diving starting Mother's Day. So should I cancel my trip because someone decided last minute that they have a mother to visit on said day? That they are more important than me because my mother passed away? Why is the last minute person more important than the person that planned in advance? And why does the person who has to visit their mother only do it on Mother's Day? Send a card, make a phone call, and plan to spend more than a weekend with your mother, as she should be more important than a Hallmark holiday that tells you when to visit.
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