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18
“Abrupt And Callous”: Man With Autism Told He Wasn’t Welcome At Public Library’s Children’s Room
A 31-year-old man with dual developmental disabilities, autism and Prader-Willi Syndrome, was informed that he could not be in the children’s area of the West Harrison Library.
During a visit to the children’s room at West Harrison, New York, a librarian approached Matt Maillet’s supporter, Kayla Brown, and told her that Matt would need to go to the adult section. They also informed Kayla that the library would provide children’s books for Matt to browse there.
“I called the director and explained the issues,” Daniel Maillet, Matt’s father, said before adding that the librarian didn’t care about his request. “It was abrupt, and it was callous.”
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A 31-year-old man with autism was told he couldn’t be in the children’s area of the West Harrison Library in New York
Image credits: Usa today
According to the Harrison Public Library’s website, children’s room regulations specify that the room and programs are for children ages 12 and under and those accompanying a child.
Additionally, the space is intended for patrons accessing material only available in the children’s room or people developing curricula and researching children’s literature.
“All other patrons must only use the other areas of the Library,” the site reads.
It further states: “However, children (whether with a caregiver or not) who are deemed too disruptive by the Library staff will be warned that if they do not settle down, they will be asked to leave the Library.
“Extreme or repetitive disruptive behavior, in the sole judgment of the Library staff, may result in immediate expulsion from the Library.”
Matt Maillet loves picture books, but he was told that he needed to go to the adult section because of his age
Image credits: Usa today
Daniel believes that the library shouldn’t focus exclusively on chronological age when deciding who gets to enjoy their colorful picture books.
“It’s not their physical age, it’s their mental age. As long as they have aides with them,” Matt’s dad explained.
Matt is nonverbal and has limited communication skills. In the past, he has attended various children’s programs at his church, St. Barnabas Episcopal in Irvington.
One of his favorite characters is Elmo, and he is particularly fond of picture books.
“It was abrupt, and it was callous,” Matt’s father, Daniel, said of the incident
Image credits: Pexels/Pixabay
Kayla, his supporter and former nanny, says library visits help keep Matt entertained, especially during the colder months when outdoor activities are scarce.
She describes Matt as “such a sweet guy,” and she says she didn’t hear any families complaining about his presence in the children’s room.
In a conversation with a neighbor of the Maillets, Harrison Library Director Galina Chernykh said that the library offers adult programs that are designed to be inclusive and accessible.
“Your understanding in this matter is greatly appreciated as we navigate the delicate balance between inclusivity and adherence to policy,” Chernykh wrote on Tuesday (March 5) in an email.
According to the library’s website, children’s room regulations specify that the room and programs are for children ages 12 and under and those accompanying a child
Image credits: West Harrison Library
The issue isn’t one that pertains to the law but rather the social tact in regards to those with a disability, Peter Zummo, a retired lawyer in Erie County and a parent of a 25-year-old with autism, points out.
“Segregating by age is not inherently illegal. But it’s not a good look,” Zummo, who serves on the executive committee of the New York Alliance for the Developmentally Disabled, told USA Today.
Age-restriction issues of this kind could affect other people in a similar situation to Matt. One out of 36 children and 1 in 45 adults in the U.S. has autism, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
Kayla set up a change.org petition titled “Discrimination against special needs adults West Harrison NY Library” to seek support for Matt and other adults with disabilities and spread awareness about the incident.
Kayla Brown, Matt’s supporter and former nanny, set up a petition to seek support for Matt and other adults with disabilities
“Hi all, I care for a 31 year old autistic male who is nonverbal and also has Prader-Willi syndrome,” she describes.
“He has the mentality of a 5 year old. He enjoys watching Barney and loves to read Clifford and Thomas the Train books. Books are his absolute favorite thing.”
“We feel that the rules should be carefully changed to allow IDD disabled individuals with close monitoring by an aide to be able to participate,” the petition states.
“IDD” stands for intellectual or developmental disability. While intellectual disability refers to differences in the ability to learn, reason, and problem solve, as well as everyday social and life skills, developmental disability is a broader term that describes often lifelong challenges that can be intellectual, physical, or both.
Matt’s dad may not be optimistic about the library’s policies changing anytime soon, but he hopes his case will shed light on the needs of those with developmental disabilities and the importance of inclusion.
“I’ve been advocating for 30 years,” Daniel Maillet said. “If something’s not right, I call it out.”
What do you think ?
Giraffy Window 9 months ago (edited)
Learning to make space for people with differences is an important part of child development. Learning acceptance and empathy ensures we will see changes for the better in future. I could understand if he were being loud or rough, but it honestly just sounds like he was sitting, reading, and minding his own business. Also he had an attendant there! What a sad situation. This is like those stories where Dads are singled out for being in the park with their kids "ohhhh scary adult male!" Blindly deciding he's there for ill intent without actually paying attention to what he's doing. This library is teaching children to fear without understanding.
Phil Vaive 9 months ago
Exactly. That man is disabled, better whisk him away from the children!
Load More Replies...
Tabitha 9 months ago
I'm going to say no he shouldn't be in the kids section, and will try to phrase this with sensitivity. Regardless of his autism and level of understanding, he is still physically a grown man, and all that entails, though he may not understand it, also we don't know if how well he's able to understand and handle his size in comparison to the children. He is not a child. Now, if the library can create a space for neurodivergent adults that has picture books available, or that has attendants who can accompany them to the children's section to choose books then return to the adult section, or neurodivergent space, then that could be a viable compromise. We cannot forget that he is a grown man, though one who, unfortunately, may not quite understand that he could intimidate or frighten many of the children in the kids section. He shouldn't be barred from the library, but there should be some space available for him there.
Phil Vaive 9 months ago (edited)
I'm autistic, and I agree to a point - yes, we do need to have more consideration for those of us with disabilities. The world is not designed at all with us in mind. However, without having been there while all this was occurring, I don't think it's fair to assume that he was in any way intimidating or frightening kids, or that the space was unfit for him. Kids are around adults all the time, why should any of them be frightened of another one, especially one who, it sounds like, wasn't really interacting with them at all?
Load More Replies...
arthbach 9 months ago
If this man was physically violent, or sexually threatening, THEN the would be good reason to keep him away from children. However if the only reason is his age, then it is deeply inappropriate. It really sounds like he just wants to enjoy the books he loves, and those books are in the children's section. I really hate when people say they are adhering to their policy, without considering whether their policy is fair, appropriate or correct.
Parmeisan 9 months ago
Right? I'm gonna just correct their comment here, it's not that far off from what they actually said... "as we navigate the delicate balance between inclusivity and our expressed intention of exclusivity".
Load More Replies...
Two_rolling_black_eyes 9 months ago (edited)
The kid's section of a library is designed for smaller people, the same way the kiddie pool is set aside from the big pool at most parks. There are smaller chairs, tables, and shelves and big people seating is a premium. Just like the kiddie pool, its set aside for these littler bodies. Anyone can read any book but its a courtesy to use the bigger area if you can. I take my kids to the indoor city pool all the time. The teenagers grab the floaties and dive toys from the kiddie pool area and use them in the big pool because you don't want a bunch 4 ft+ people splashing in 2 ft water.
Pittsburgh rare 9 months ago
If you've ever been slapped by a man with the strength of a giant but the mind of a 5 yo as l have, you kinda understand why they deny him the acces to the children's area. But sending him to the adults's area is not the solution either. There should be a safe space where neuro divergent or differently developed people can socialise and meet their needs
Maria Colatarci 9 months ago
I can't see having a different room for every tricky situation. That is segregation. I can see supervision as a good answer. If the person is his own guardian he can go where he wants until or unless he poses a behavior risk. If he is not his own guardian he needs to be with someone, same as the swimming pool.
Load More Replies... Maria Colatarci 9 months ago
Accommodations for disabled persons often help everyone. This taught to me by a disabled lawyer who was my private duty client for some years. The example she gave was architectural features such as curb cuts. But as I read this story I realize that its about non material things too, like the way we treat each other. Disabilities, and disabled persons, are very different from one another and need to be considered as individuals. Such as, our man is too old for the kids section, but if you watch him and realize he's not a behavioral risk, you make an exception. What kind of world would it be if we all gave each other this kind of consideration?
Meghan Kern 9 months ago
I go into the children section to read Percy jackson books and I have autism so no that shouldn’t be a big deal as im 28!
Randy Sanders 9 months ago
Unless you are the parent of an autistic child, you have no idea what damaged this caused. And shame on those that want him to go away. That is one of the most bigoted responses I ave ever witnessed.
devotedtodreams 9 months ago
But... the library said he would be provided with children's books to read in the adult area of the library, no? So it's not as if they're denying him the books - THAT really would be a problem. But he is physically an adult, so I do side with the library on this.
LokisLilButterknife 9 months ago (edited)
Do you know how incredibly ableist that is, though? So, why are adults researching children's curricula allowed in there according to the library's policy? The library is denying adults with severe development disabilities, some of which have the mental capacity of a child, access to entertainment and socialization opportunities. It's discrimination against people with severe forms of autism. I have NEVER heard of a library enacting such an ableist policy. Why can't they create a safe space for nuero-divergent and developmentally delayed people then.
Load More Replies...
Linden 9 months ago
I hate that almost every article or discussion around disability on Bored Panda is rife with ableism. But then sadly that mirrors society I guess. There are so many problems here but to focus on just one - mental age theory is ableist and unhelpful. Matt is a 31 year old with a 31 year old mind. He has intellectual disability. That's how to describe him, not as having the mind of a child which is so infantilising. The mental age concept oversimplifies a person's complexity, may ignore some forms of intelligence, frames them in a limiting way, can control a person's freedom and support and its history is connected to eugenics. I am an autistic person who works as an educator, coach, researcher and advisor about autistic and disabled life. Disabled people have protected rights to exist within and engage in public spaces and have those spaces be universally accessible.
Maria Colatarci 9 months ago
Right. It's a lot simpler than people are making it out to be. Classifying this person is trying to help others think about him in positive ways, "oh he's actually a child"... but we should make no assumptions about him based on these imposed constructs. If he acts well towards others in that setting, he can be there, same as you and me. people are so frightened of each other.
Load More Replies...
FluffyDreg 9 months ago
Please read this quote from their policies. "Additionally, the space is intended for patrons accessing material only available in the children’s room or people developing curricula and researching children’s literature." Adults accessing the books in the childrens room, not even just for professional reasons, are the INTENDED people using the room. Yet they singled him out despite laying firmly in that list.
allivymar 9 months ago
I like how the library states "The Library staff has no obligation to and will make no attempt to restrict access by children to information in the Library or on its computers." Apparently restricting access to developmentally appropriate sections by well behaved, cognitively disabled adults is ok though.
Phil Vaive 9 months ago
I think this points to a larger issue in our society, in that there are limited/no spaces for those of us with disabilities. We just aren't usually considered, and are often ignored or swept aside because of this. It's honestly really distressing.
KatSaidWhat 9 months ago
I bet it was other parents upset - it's pretty clear he's not a mature adult.
Giraffy Window 9 months ago (edited)
Learning to make space for people with differences is an important part of child development. Learning acceptance and empathy ensures we will see changes for the better in future. I could understand if he were being loud or rough, but it honestly just sounds like he was sitting, reading, and minding his own business. Also he had an attendant there! What a sad situation. This is like those stories where Dads are singled out for being in the park with their kids "ohhhh scary adult male!" Blindly deciding he's there for ill intent without actually paying attention to what he's doing. This library is teaching children to fear without understanding.
Phil Vaive 9 months ago
Exactly. That man is disabled, better whisk him away from the children!
Load More Replies... Tabitha 9 months ago
I'm going to say no he shouldn't be in the kids section, and will try to phrase this with sensitivity. Regardless of his autism and level of understanding, he is still physically a grown man, and all that entails, though he may not understand it, also we don't know if how well he's able to understand and handle his size in comparison to the children. He is not a child. Now, if the library can create a space for neurodivergent adults that has picture books available, or that has attendants who can accompany them to the children's section to choose books then return to the adult section, or neurodivergent space, then that could be a viable compromise. We cannot forget that he is a grown man, though one who, unfortunately, may not quite understand that he could intimidate or frighten many of the children in the kids section. He shouldn't be barred from the library, but there should be some space available for him there.
Phil Vaive 9 months ago (edited)
I'm autistic, and I agree to a point - yes, we do need to have more consideration for those of us with disabilities. The world is not designed at all with us in mind. However, without having been there while all this was occurring, I don't think it's fair to assume that he was in any way intimidating or frightening kids, or that the space was unfit for him. Kids are around adults all the time, why should any of them be frightened of another one, especially one who, it sounds like, wasn't really interacting with them at all?
Load More Replies... arthbach 9 months ago
If this man was physically violent, or sexually threatening, THEN the would be good reason to keep him away from children. However if the only reason is his age, then it is deeply inappropriate. It really sounds like he just wants to enjoy the books he loves, and those books are in the children's section. I really hate when people say they are adhering to their policy, without considering whether their policy is fair, appropriate or correct.
Parmeisan 9 months ago
Right? I'm gonna just correct their comment here, it's not that far off from what they actually said... "as we navigate the delicate balance between inclusivity and our expressed intention of exclusivity".
Load More Replies... Two_rolling_black_eyes 9 months ago (edited)
The kid's section of a library is designed for smaller people, the same way the kiddie pool is set aside from the big pool at most parks. There are smaller chairs, tables, and shelves and big people seating is a premium. Just like the kiddie pool, its set aside for these littler bodies. Anyone can read any book but its a courtesy to use the bigger area if you can. I take my kids to the indoor city pool all the time. The teenagers grab the floaties and dive toys from the kiddie pool area and use them in the big pool because you don't want a bunch 4 ft+ people splashing in 2 ft water.
Pittsburgh rare 9 months ago
If you've ever been slapped by a man with the strength of a giant but the mind of a 5 yo as l have, you kinda understand why they deny him the acces to the children's area. But sending him to the adults's area is not the solution either. There should be a safe space where neuro divergent or differently developed people can socialise and meet their needs
Maria Colatarci 9 months ago
I can't see having a different room for every tricky situation. That is segregation. I can see supervision as a good answer. If the person is his own guardian he can go where he wants until or unless he poses a behavior risk. If he is not his own guardian he needs to be with someone, same as the swimming pool.
Load More Replies... Maria Colatarci 9 months ago
Accommodations for disabled persons often help everyone. This taught to me by a disabled lawyer who was my private duty client for some years. The example she gave was architectural features such as curb cuts. But as I read this story I realize that its about non material things too, like the way we treat each other. Disabilities, and disabled persons, are very different from one another and need to be considered as individuals. Such as, our man is too old for the kids section, but if you watch him and realize he's not a behavioral risk, you make an exception. What kind of world would it be if we all gave each other this kind of consideration?
Meghan Kern 9 months ago
I go into the children section to read Percy jackson books and I have autism so no that shouldn’t be a big deal as im 28!
Randy Sanders 9 months ago
Unless you are the parent of an autistic child, you have no idea what damaged this caused. And shame on those that want him to go away. That is one of the most bigoted responses I ave ever witnessed.
devotedtodreams 9 months ago
But... the library said he would be provided with children's books to read in the adult area of the library, no? So it's not as if they're denying him the books - THAT really would be a problem. But he is physically an adult, so I do side with the library on this.
LokisLilButterknife 9 months ago (edited)
Do you know how incredibly ableist that is, though? So, why are adults researching children's curricula allowed in there according to the library's policy? The library is denying adults with severe development disabilities, some of which have the mental capacity of a child, access to entertainment and socialization opportunities. It's discrimination against people with severe forms of autism. I have NEVER heard of a library enacting such an ableist policy. Why can't they create a safe space for nuero-divergent and developmentally delayed people then.
Load More Replies... Linden 9 months ago
I hate that almost every article or discussion around disability on Bored Panda is rife with ableism. But then sadly that mirrors society I guess. There are so many problems here but to focus on just one - mental age theory is ableist and unhelpful. Matt is a 31 year old with a 31 year old mind. He has intellectual disability. That's how to describe him, not as having the mind of a child which is so infantilising. The mental age concept oversimplifies a person's complexity, may ignore some forms of intelligence, frames them in a limiting way, can control a person's freedom and support and its history is connected to eugenics. I am an autistic person who works as an educator, coach, researcher and advisor about autistic and disabled life. Disabled people have protected rights to exist within and engage in public spaces and have those spaces be universally accessible.
Maria Colatarci 9 months ago
Right. It's a lot simpler than people are making it out to be. Classifying this person is trying to help others think about him in positive ways, "oh he's actually a child"... but we should make no assumptions about him based on these imposed constructs. If he acts well towards others in that setting, he can be there, same as you and me. people are so frightened of each other.
Load More Replies... FluffyDreg 9 months ago
Please read this quote from their policies. "Additionally, the space is intended for patrons accessing material only available in the children’s room or people developing curricula and researching children’s literature." Adults accessing the books in the childrens room, not even just for professional reasons, are the INTENDED people using the room. Yet they singled him out despite laying firmly in that list.
allivymar 9 months ago
I like how the library states "The Library staff has no obligation to and will make no attempt to restrict access by children to information in the Library or on its computers." Apparently restricting access to developmentally appropriate sections by well behaved, cognitively disabled adults is ok though.
Phil Vaive 9 months ago
I think this points to a larger issue in our society, in that there are limited/no spaces for those of us with disabilities. We just aren't usually considered, and are often ignored or swept aside because of this. It's honestly really distressing.
KatSaidWhat 9 months ago
I bet it was other parents upset - it's pretty clear he's not a mature adult.
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