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“Brutal And Absolutely Brilliant”: Man’s Petty Revenge On Jerk Neighbor Leaves Her Gagging Twice
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“Brutal And Absolutely Brilliant”: Man’s Petty Revenge On Jerk Neighbor Leaves Her Gagging Twice

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Most of us make a real effort to avoid entitled, rude or just unpleasant people, but sometimes life just deals you a difficult hand. For example, your family might be deeply not fun to be around, your coworkers can be selfish jerks or your neighbors can be annoying or downright terrible, so the only thing people have left to do is make peace with it or get back at them.

A woman kept letting her dog defecate on a man’s lawn so he finally took things into his own hands and prepared some petty revenge. We reached out to the man in the story via private message and will update the article when he gets back to us.

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One man finally had enough of a neighbor letting her dog leave a mess on his lawn

Image credits: RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo)

“Revenge is a dish best served stinky”

“I have a neighbor who let their dog cr*p in my yard. She’d just let it outside without a leash to go poop whenever it’s heart desired, then yell for him to come inside. Never once picked up a t*rd. I confronted her multiple times, and she was insistent that it wasn’t her dog. Like, I live on a corner lot, with a dirt alley behind me. You’re my only neighbor.

The last time I knocked on her door she threatened to mace me. So I went out very early that morning, while it was still dark out, and took a mister bottle of water. I misted her windshield, then took handfuls of dust and sprinkled it over it. Then I used a newspaper from her porch to pick up some dog t*rds and lined them across her windshield wipers. With her windshield so dusty, she couldn’t see the surprise I’d left her. Then I waited.

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Image credits: Kaboompics / pexels (not the actual photo)

She came out to get in her car and turned on the windshield washers. The wipers made an absolute mess on her windshield. Dog cr*p smeared everywhere. The washer fluid made it worse. Then the smell hit her. She jumped out of the car and puked all over her driveway. She spent some time [kneeling] in the driveway heaving her guts out, then came out with some cleaner and began [desperately] trying to clean the greasy mess, retching the whole time.

The kicker? I took the newspaper that I had used to retrieve the t*rds, rolled it up, and put it back in the sleeve. Put it on her porch. Later that day she came home from work, picked up the paper, and carried it inside. Few minutes later, I hear more puking noises from my porch. She walks her dog with a leash now. I wish I could say she picks up after him, but she doesn’t. Just avoids my yard like the plague. Can’t win them all I guess.

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TL;DR: Lady let her dog poop in my yard. Returned to sender in glorious fashion.”

Credits: zorggalacticus

Picking up after your dog isn’t just a courtesy, it’s literally the law

Image credits: Wolf Art / pexels (not the actual photo)

While this man’s revenge might seem a bit extreme, it’s important to note that what the woman was doing was downright illegal in most places. We don’t know exactly where this happened, but the vast majority of US states and cities have laws mandating that people pick up after their dogs. A failure to do so can lead to heavy fines, although it could be argued that paying a fine is actually easier than cleaning dog excrement from a windshield. Laws don’t often prevent entitled people from doing what they do best, but it at least allows for law enforcement to get involved.

Setting that aside, it’s also the most normal part of being a good neighbor. A person’s lawn is their property, just because a dog isn’t a human, doesn’t mean its actions can’t have consequences. She was perfectly willing to threaten someone on her doorstep with mace, so she is familiar with the concept. The owner is responsible. After all, the aforementioned laws don’t penalize a dog for having bowel movements, everyone has them. Instead, the owner is penalized for not picking up.

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However, documenting the woman’s actions and then going to the police would be a long and arduous process. After all, the man in the story would have to literally prove that it’s her dog and that she is aware of what it’s doing. It would have ultimately been the right thing to do, but some folks really need the catharsis of taking action themselves.

Getting back at someone who really bothered you does have some psychological upsides

Image credits: Eren Li / pexels (not the actual photo)

In Studies on Hysteria, Austrian psychiatrists Josef Breuer and Sigmund Freud wrote that “The injured person’s reaction to the trauma only exercises a completely ‘cathartic’ effect if it is an adequate reaction as, for instance, revenge. But language serves as a substitute for action; by its help, an affect can be ‘abreacted’ almost as effectively.”

They were arguing for talking about events like this as a means to get over them, but they also suggested that revenge is a method of overcoming trauma. Whether or not this man actually suffered trauma from the neighbor’s dog is a separate question, but it would make sense that taking action no doubt felt good. This is perhaps why there are many, similar examples across the internet, of people planning some quality revenge.

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At the very least, she will stay way

Image credits: Victoria Strelka_ph / pexels (not the actual photo)

At the same time, we can’t really argue with results. If the woman started using a leash, then she probably did understand the error of her ways. Using the literal excrement her dog left is just hammering the point home. There is always the risk that she takes some revenge in the future. By not letting her dog on his lawn, she is removing any “ammunition” he might use, after all. She is not at all in the right, which she must know if she stopped.

This is also a rare case of a particularly entitled person deciding to change their ways, although she might still think she is “right” and just wants to avoid future “windshield reprisals.” Unfortunately, there is rarely anything that can be done to truly change entitled people’s minds until they actually see consequences. However, this does reinforce the man’s methods as effective. He isn’t out to change hearts and minds, he just doesn’t want her dog doing its business on his lawn.

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Netizen’s applauded his methods

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Justin Sandberg

Justin Sandberg

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

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Justin Sandberg

Justin Sandberg

Writer, BoredPanda staff

I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

Gabija Saveiskyte

Gabija Saveiskyte

Author, BoredPanda staff

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Hi there! I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. My job is to ensure that all the articles are aesthetically pleasing. I get to work with a variety of topics ranging from all the relationship drama to lots and lots of memes and, my personal favorites, funny cute cats. When I am not perfecting the images, you can find me reading with a cup of matcha latte and a cat in my lap, taking photos (of my cat), getting lost in the forest, or simply cuddling with my cat... Did I mention that I love cats?

Read less »

Gabija Saveiskyte

Gabija Saveiskyte

Author, BoredPanda staff

Hi there! I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. My job is to ensure that all the articles are aesthetically pleasing. I get to work with a variety of topics ranging from all the relationship drama to lots and lots of memes and, my personal favorites, funny cute cats. When I am not perfecting the images, you can find me reading with a cup of matcha latte and a cat in my lap, taking photos (of my cat), getting lost in the forest, or simply cuddling with my cat... Did I mention that I love cats?

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Pam
Community Member
5 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This woman is the Petty God amongst us mere mortals!! All hail the Poopinator the Magnificent 💩💩✨✨👑👑

G A
Community Member
5 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'll take 'Things that never happened' for 10 points, please, Bob....

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Pam
Community Member
5 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This woman is the Petty God amongst us mere mortals!! All hail the Poopinator the Magnificent 💩💩✨✨👑👑

G A
Community Member
5 days ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'll take 'Things that never happened' for 10 points, please, Bob....

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