Anyone else have a permanent negative 100 inner battery?

Live is a big rollercoaster, my friends...

Sooo thirsty

Kids ALWAYS play with "educational" toys and games in every way except the intended way.

Food baby

That is why you should have all the changing stuff ready prior to taking the nappy off. If you have boys have 2 new nappies but to the side and as soon as you take the nappy off quickly cover the penis with a new one so if they wee it soaks into the new nappy instead of the carpet/floor etc. If he pees in the new nappy then at least you already have another spare.

That's gonna take a while to get off

Do not forget battling over crumbs that fell to the ground!

Relatable...?

I cut my hair shorter to keep my baby from pulling it while breastfeeding. She just reached further to get the hair which made the situation even worse.

Skorts were the best invention ever for us mommies!

I have one ten percenter and two ninety percenters.

Sure that's a rock?

I actually saw someone bring their toy poodle to a sandbox with kids in it, set the dog down, the dog pooped, and it bit one of the kids. The lady then walked away as if nothing happened

The kitty <3

Always!

When our son was born I taught my husband choking/CPR protocol. I never will forget what an instructor told me when I balked at the force required when attempting to dislodge an obstruction/perform compressions on an infant doll. “Trust me, when you are trying to save his life, bruises are the least of your worries.” I thought this was valuable as real scenario advice and repeated it to my concerned husband during the doll demonstration. One year later he saved our son’s life when he swallowed a cracker whole in another room. This hits home.

This is the pain scale I use on my patients who aren't critical. 0-no pain, 10-stepping on a lego in the middle of the night on your way to the bathroom. Humor is the best medicine.

Me

When the baby sleeps, you sleep.

Where is da-da?

I think a chip is implanted on our ear and butt while we're in the recovery room. As soon as you try to make a phone call or sit on the toilet it sends a signal to your children telling them they need something from mommy.

I usually hear my chairs scraping across the floor on its way to something up high that was put up there to keep it from my kids...