“You Can’t Even Make That Up”: 30 Times People Received A Work Benefit So Bad, It Was Insulting
Interview With ExpertThe holidays are a season of giving, but generosity is a subjective term.
A recent r/AskReddit post by a user who goes online as AdHour6144 sparked a conversation about the most insulting job benefits and bonuses employees have ever received.
From cheap gift cards to the "privilege" of being able to listen to your company's podcast, some decision-makers need to seriously reconsider what they see as perks.
After all, when livelihood is concerned, it's not just the thought that matters.
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I once worked on an assembly line in a factory. Big factory. Easily took 15-20 minutes to walk from my end of it to the front of the building where corporate was. That's an important detail here.
So one time they asked us all to pull a lot of overtime for a few weeks to catch up on some promised production numbers they oversold or some BS. As a "thank you" they announced they were going to bring in some ice cream trucks for us all to get free ice cream. They brought the trucks to the end of the building near the offices. Our break wasn't long enough to get to the ice cream and get back to work on time. Only the suits got free ice cream. So in summary, to thank the production workers for doing extra hours they bragged to us that the desk job guys who caused the trouble in the first place got free ice cream and we didn't. That one pissed me off.
Another time they asked us to work over the night before Christmas eve. It should have been a shutdown day. They promised everyone a free lunch for giving up our holiday time. 12&1/2 hour shift and no food ever showed up. They forgot and we were all starving. The next shift when everyone was there we were told not to say a word about it publicly or we'd be fired.
Anyway, I learned two lessons from that job. 1 never trust your boss when they promise you free food, bring a backup meal just in case. 2 never agree to get paid in stock, at my level it will never be worth more than the salary they'll probably ask me to give up for it and it makes taxes hell.
I spent 2 years working there. I won't say their name but they build electric cars in Fremont CA and their owner is a South African who recently purchased twitter and the White House.
Other fun stories are the times a guy lost a foot getting run over by a forklift, a guy getting electrocuted to death, numerous fires in the paint department, multiple class action lawsuits for making us doctor out time cards, and so many other messed up things. But the ice cream thing, that is the one that still really makes my blood boil almost 8 years later.
I was a repairs specialist working in quality control, my job was to repair defects for a major automotive manufacturer. The last line of defense before it goes out the door.
Quality-was-my-job.
We won a JD Power award for quality, a prestigious industry award.
The office got thousands in bonuses, and they all got a Rolex.
You know what I got? Or my department rather?
A waxy piece of chocolate the size of the palm of my hand that said *JD Power* on it.
That's it
That's all
I told them thanks for f*cking nothing and threw it in the garbage and told them I won't be working there much longer. They actually had the balls to say that I should be grateful. I replied ill be grateful when I leave this sh*thole and I never have to step foot on this property again.
I have actually thrown away several "rewards" while staring eye to eye with a supervisor. Always said thanks while I did so.
To gain deeper insights into corporate perks, we contacted Heather O'Neill, a career expert from Resume Now, an online platform that provides useful tools and resources for job seekers.
"Perks and benefits play a vital role in enhancing employee satisfaction by addressing needs that go beyond just a paycheck," she told Bored Panda.
"When thoughtfully designed, they can significantly boost workplace happiness, motivation, and retention."
This was in 2004. Our 'Christmas bonuses' were hyped up for months. We got a pizza party in the breakroom with a DJ (the guy who ran the mailroom) and they handed out envelopes to everyone.
It was a Target gift card with $5 on it. My department was so angry we decided to pool our cards and buy supplies for a chemo care package for one of our people who was fighting breast cancer. That made us feel a bit better.
Worked at an Amazon warehouse and management told us we were the most efficient warehouse in the entire national system during peak on some metric and will be getting a prize soon. In February, someone writes on the suggestion board asking what that prize is going to be, they reply It’s on its way now.
The prize was that one of our Kivabots that delivers the shelves to our workstations will be autographed by Jeff Bezos. He never actually came to our warehouse so they probably printed a sticker and put it on one of the machines. So every once in a while, we will get to see the great one's signature on the robot that delivers us tasks.
We will make a donation in your name to our church.
I also have to add... he was the pastor of the church.
As the great George Carlin said: He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can't handle money.
O'Neill said that, "To make the biggest impact on employees' well-being and morale, perks should align closely with what they value. Employers can think of perks in two key categories: those that meet basic needs and those that cater to aspirational goals."
"Basic perks and benefits, like health insurance, flexible schedules, and paid time off, address essential needs," the career expert explained. "They promote physical and mental well-being, support a healthy work-life balance, and reduce stress. These foundational benefits create a sense of security and stability for employees."
"On the other hand, aspirational perks, such as opportunities for professional growth, upskilling, or unique offerings like gym memberships, tuition reimbursement, or financial wellness programs, help employees pursue personal and professional goals. These perks make employees feel valued and invested in, fostering a deeper connection to the organization and its mission," she said.
The best results come when the two categories operate in tandem. "When perks are thoughtfully tailored to meet both basic and aspirational needs, they become powerful tools for creating a more engaged and satisfied workforce."
A $15 gift card for 15 years of service as a Nurse in LTC.
We got an email telling us to click on a link for a holiday appreciation gift from the company. If you clicked on it, you had just fallen for a phishing test to see if you would click on links in emails. Your gift was three hours of mandatory security training.
What the hell is wrong with people?! That's how you do your employees??
Instead of hiring more people to help out with the insane, borderline abusive demands brought on by understaffing, they hosted a professional development course on how to deal with workplace stress.
"Here, let me teach you how to be more okay with me taking advantage of you".
Last year, a survey of over 1,500 U.S. workers asked respondents to select the five most important non-salary compensation elements. The results were as follows:
✦ 65% prioritized workplace flexibility options, such as location and hours;
✦ 64% valued bonuses, commissions, or other incentive pay;
✦ 60% emphasized the importance of generous paid time off;
✦ 59% considered retirement plans with company contributions or matching to 401(k) or 403(b) essential;
✦ 53% highlighted the need for flexible and affordable healthcare plans.
"Flexible work hours."
Must be in office between 8 and 5, but you can show up even earlier or stay even later if you want.
cyclika:
"Of course we support flexible working options! You're free to work from home nights and weekends."
Said with absolutely no hint of irony nor awareness.
that is actually fairly standard for an office job in the U.S.
Load More Replies...I told our HR person we were losing employees because of low pay. I showed examples of similar jobs that were paying 25% more at other firms. She told me that the casual work atmosphere was a huge benefit and should be taken into account. My response was that I could buy a lot of neckties for $10K a year. I resigned a few weeks later and they tried to counter offer. Idiots.
If they can raise your pay in the counter offer, they could have raised it before you quit.
When I worked at a local mental health facility they had a crazy high turnover issue across the board, but particularly with clinical staff. One of their solutions for the morale issue was to throw an employee appreciation fair. Free food, games, music, the works.
The first problem was, they expected the support staff to set up and man everything (maintenance constructing the booths, IT setting up and managing the sound system, kitchen staff doing all the cooking.)
So not only did they (we, I was IT) not get to enjoy the event, we ended up a full day behind on our normal tasks as well. The other problem, the BIG problem, though, was that any of the staff that interacted with patients, particularly the clinical staff they were having trouble retaining, couldn't cancel those appointments to attend.
So the event just ended up being administrative staff and the office pool having a big party for themselves while the rest of us either served them, or heard the festivities coming from outside while they were stuck inside doing actual work. As you may imagine, it did not have the intended effect, but the C-Suite liked it so much it became an annual event.
Once worked at a place where the 'benefit' was free access to the company gym... which was just a treadmill in a dark, windowless basement room. No thanks, I'll pass on the dungeon workout.
Worked crazy OT for a month to get vital computer security updates done (every computer had to be touched individually). Those of us who were salaried were promised we would be taken care of for the 20+ hours of overtime each week.
Hourly people earned time and a half.
Salaried people got a company embroidered baseball cap as a 'thank you'. Oh, and so did the hourly people.
And yet companies gripe about how "nobody wants to work anymore". Disgusting!
I had a job where we were allowed to pay to wear jeans. You can’t even make that s**t up.
Only acceptable if it was for charity (e.g. Jeans for Genes day) but not if it is going into the owner's pocket
"When we send you overseas, we book you a 'discreet' hotel that doesn't ask ages."
WHO DAFUQ YOU GOT WORKING HERE?!?!
"Free water for the employees"
Wow thank you!
Green_Caterpillar_99:
I work as a waitress right now and we are allowed free tap water. Cold or hot.
All of these are Absurdistan worthy, but this one caught my attention. Because one of things that Americans finde strange about Europe is having to pay for water in bars/restaurants (which must be said: by now in most of not all EU countries if you are eating in a restaurant you CAN get free tap water, but you need to ask. These places are in the business of selling beverages, of course they want to make a profit). But, again: in most, if not all, EU countries employers are must provide drinking water for their employees, and often provide other free drinks.So I find it slightly funny that in the same country you can get free water in bars/restaurants, but your boss is allowed to let you die from dehydration/s
The coupons on stuff I still cant afford to buy. Oh 10% off a car, or cruise? Thanks, Still no christmas bonus or anything.
We once got a $50 gift card to an insanely high-end department store. Thanks, I'll get that jar of quince jam I've had my eye on!
I worked at a radiology clinic where they would provide a single bread roll for staff for lunch on Wednesdays. No fillings or spreads. Just a plain white bread roll.
I was in my mid-30’s at a large nonprofit and HR made us complete a questionnaire like: What’s your favorite color? What’s your favorite candy? and we were told this would inform the way they would reward us.
I just wrote “money” as my favorite everything. Pay me in money, please. What am I, five?
25 vacation days.
This is not a "benefit" this is the f*****g law in my country. Trying to imply that you're giving me vacation time out of the goodness of your heart while in fact you're obliged by law to do that is stupid.
What's next? Say that I'm allowed to breath while I'm working?
After 2 years of working there, they announced with great fanfare that we were generously being given two paid sick days per year. I later discovered that they were just complying with recently passed legislation here in Quebec, Canada.
One job I worked, we were given 2 weeks of leave a year. BUT, if you actually wanted to use it you couldn’t take an actual week or two weeks off at one time - best spread it out as a day here or there. Why? Because if you took a week off and panic didn’t happen, or you didn’t need to login to do your job while on vacay, then obviously you weren’t a necessary employee and your coworkers could pick up your slack easily. The trick, if you wanted a week off, was to make sure an emergency happened one day during your vacay to prove you were necessary. It should be notes that this decision was never made by the managers. It was all caused by the president of the company, who was constantly looking for people to cut to “save money”. We went from a company with 200 people, to 75 in 2 years. Roughly 30 were cut for daring to use their vacation time. Also, we lost our days if we didn’t use them by end of year, so added bonus for the company.
I made it to the five year mark working a laborious job for little pay, after 08 recession “you’re lucky to have a job” phase. They acknowledged my milestone with a 5 dollar Starbucks gift card. At that point why bother?
And I can’t count how many “thanks for working the holidays again, there is pizza in the break room!” (Btw, no pizza left by the time I was able to make it).
Old Starbucks joke: A man bought a cup of coffee from Starbucks, but the barista caused him to spill it. Angrily, the man left. He got a lawyer, and they decided to sue Starbucks for $1 million. When the judge asked why so much, the man said, "I just want my money back."
They signed a deal with a gas station chain, employees would get a certain amount off on gasoline/diesel. This was paraded out with a full company meeting and everything.
The price reduction was less than normal customers that got a card with that gas station chain.
So they had spent months working out a deal that was worse than what anyone could get by signing up at the gas station chains website.
A vacation to a lake in Kansas (didn't know there were lakes there) where I would cook for my bosses friends in a waterski tournament. That guy hated me forever for calling him out and declining the vacation.
Employee of the month got lunch with the CEO. The CEO was a total unlikable k**b, who forced employees to socialize with them. You would never nominate someone you actually liked for this 'award'.
This is the first out of (guessing) several hundred BP items, where the censored k-n-o-b was actually meant to be an insult. In fact I had no idea a spherical doorhandle/ball shaped control button COULD be an insult until I saw BP censor it.
Staff appreciation BBQ where all the staff was invited, but we still had to cook for all 300 employees. Everyone got to go but the kitchen staff and they never made it up to us.
We did a potluck for 50 people last week that I *got* to plan, organize, cook for, set up and then clean up all by myself. What did my boss contribute? Nothing. Not even a little bag of chips from the vending machine. Didn't even throw his plate in the trash. Entitled pos. Thanks for the "party" a-hole.
They got a food truck to come out and park behind the building for us. They didn’t pay for any of the food or consult us on the type of food we wanted. So basically the benefit was “you can pay for your lunch if you happen to like this food” but they hyped it up as some grand gesture.
The place I worked for once did that, and paid for the food too. Problem was it took an hour and a half to wait in line, place your order, and wait for it to be cooked, never mind eating it. None of us had that kind of time, so management and sales staff got a treat.
Costco I work at is low on seasonal workers so for any current employees that can bring in a friend or family member, we get a free hotdog.
I started a bar job and the people who were supposed to take over from my shift quit, so I worked three shifts in a row my first day. After working 23 hours my boss said he’d give me a bottle of liquor as a thank you. He gave me a half bottle.
For teacher appreciation week, the school gave us a ‘gift card’ to Chik-fil-a, to be redeemed for a free breakfast sandwich. Also, it could only be used at one specific Chik-fil-A near work, and it had an expiration date.
A coupon. That’s called a coupon.
They also fired me a few weeks later, which was honestly a much better gift… because f**k that school.
I got one that I just found out the kicker for this morning! "If you have COVID or the flu, you can be off until 48hrs after your fever has subsided so that we limit the spread." The kicker "You have to us your PTO for the missed days" It is mandatory 5 days from diagnosis and could be longer if your fever was on the last two days. So, while making it seem like they want you to get better while not affecting others, they are charging you your time off on mandatory stay at home orders.
I used to work for GM. One year, they gave us a Twinkie as a "thank you" for some award or another that GM got. GM made BILLIONS, we got a Twinkie. Most of them got nailed to different walls around the plant.
I worked for local government, so by law we weren't allowed to receive bonuses, treats, or gifts paid for by public tax dollars. Any extras we got were either paid for by employees or by the boss. Even our bottled water was employee-paid. At one point, we had a department head who would "reward" us by bringing a 1-pound box of chocolates for 22 people to share. She once handed me a dozen donuts and told me to take them in the breakroom and cut them all in half so there would be enough for everyone.
We joke that as a christmas gift we got an oil lamp that produces no light when lit, but we do actually have real benefits when compared to the stories in the article.
We just got a bonus in a way that should be the standard everywhere. Every single worker got benefit according to the hours they worked. Those working minimum hours got 100€, those working full time 400€ and everything else something between. But what makes it great is that the positions don't matter at all. If you work full time it's the same amount whether you are a boss, manager, or kitchen aid.
It's wild to me that while every story here is about corporations and management screwing over the people on the floor, so many of the comments are just throwing mud at OTHER EMPLOYEES. Salaried vs non-salaried etc. I guess this is what you end up with when both sides of the political spectrum vote against any and all regulation of big business and wage open war on worker rights.
When I worked athe Bronx Zoo in the 90s, our Christmas bonus was a frozen turkey.
Does anyone know of any websites like "Bored Panda"? All of the ads, the blatant marketing and "Bored Panda Premium" are starting to get annoying.
Once I would have said being appreciated and valued at your job was important, but then I found out what being "appreciated" actually gets you.
As a former manager, I was always pleased to be able to recognize and reward my staff for good performance - and they regularly earned it. Unfortunately, there always seemed to be one or two individuals that were never pleased with anything. No lunch, either catered or sandwich platters or pizza was not good enough, no financial reward was enough, no gesture or gift was suitable. Having to work within the constraints of corporate, I did my best. The staff averaged a free lunch (pizza or deli) per month, much nicer lunches at the holidays, for training sessions, etc. I fully support doing nice things for the troops, but a little appreciation upward is also nice.
I'm in England and years ago I lived/worked in a city called Bradford. Bradford has a high level of Pakistani people living there. The company I worked for decided to give us all a frozen turkey as a Christmas bonus. This meant of course that most of the workers could not eat them due to religous reasons. The next year they gave us all a voucher for a supermarket chain called Asda. At that time, there wasn't an Asda store in Bradford.
I got one that I just found out the kicker for this morning! "If you have COVID or the flu, you can be off until 48hrs after your fever has subsided so that we limit the spread." The kicker "You have to us your PTO for the missed days" It is mandatory 5 days from diagnosis and could be longer if your fever was on the last two days. So, while making it seem like they want you to get better while not affecting others, they are charging you your time off on mandatory stay at home orders.
I used to work for GM. One year, they gave us a Twinkie as a "thank you" for some award or another that GM got. GM made BILLIONS, we got a Twinkie. Most of them got nailed to different walls around the plant.
I worked for local government, so by law we weren't allowed to receive bonuses, treats, or gifts paid for by public tax dollars. Any extras we got were either paid for by employees or by the boss. Even our bottled water was employee-paid. At one point, we had a department head who would "reward" us by bringing a 1-pound box of chocolates for 22 people to share. She once handed me a dozen donuts and told me to take them in the breakroom and cut them all in half so there would be enough for everyone.
We joke that as a christmas gift we got an oil lamp that produces no light when lit, but we do actually have real benefits when compared to the stories in the article.
We just got a bonus in a way that should be the standard everywhere. Every single worker got benefit according to the hours they worked. Those working minimum hours got 100€, those working full time 400€ and everything else something between. But what makes it great is that the positions don't matter at all. If you work full time it's the same amount whether you are a boss, manager, or kitchen aid.
It's wild to me that while every story here is about corporations and management screwing over the people on the floor, so many of the comments are just throwing mud at OTHER EMPLOYEES. Salaried vs non-salaried etc. I guess this is what you end up with when both sides of the political spectrum vote against any and all regulation of big business and wage open war on worker rights.
When I worked athe Bronx Zoo in the 90s, our Christmas bonus was a frozen turkey.
Does anyone know of any websites like "Bored Panda"? All of the ads, the blatant marketing and "Bored Panda Premium" are starting to get annoying.
Once I would have said being appreciated and valued at your job was important, but then I found out what being "appreciated" actually gets you.
As a former manager, I was always pleased to be able to recognize and reward my staff for good performance - and they regularly earned it. Unfortunately, there always seemed to be one or two individuals that were never pleased with anything. No lunch, either catered or sandwich platters or pizza was not good enough, no financial reward was enough, no gesture or gift was suitable. Having to work within the constraints of corporate, I did my best. The staff averaged a free lunch (pizza or deli) per month, much nicer lunches at the holidays, for training sessions, etc. I fully support doing nice things for the troops, but a little appreciation upward is also nice.
I'm in England and years ago I lived/worked in a city called Bradford. Bradford has a high level of Pakistani people living there. The company I worked for decided to give us all a frozen turkey as a Christmas bonus. This meant of course that most of the workers could not eat them due to religous reasons. The next year they gave us all a voucher for a supermarket chain called Asda. At that time, there wasn't an Asda store in Bradford.