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“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” Here’s a rhyme we all grew up hearing and trying to embody. But as we realize, some words cut through like a knife and leave a lasting scar that may or may not heal through time and multiple therapy sessions.
It’s likely why this question recently made the rounds on Reddit: “What's the most hurtful thing someone has ever said to you?” People reopened deep wounds – some from decades ago – by sharing the harshest words they received from strangers, parents, siblings, and significant others.
These stories are sad and difficult to read—however, they also reflect resilience through mental struggles, which is admirable in itself.
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#1
My dad once said he wished he was working late the night I was conceived.
I told him mom said he was.
RELATED:
#2
I have a daughter with an extremely complicated illness. Almost lost her to it twice when she was almost 3 and again 6 months later. In-between, this was 15 years ago, I broke down and wept, being so worried about her and also how distant my wife had become from me as well. After I settled down my wife told me that me crying like that had made me less attractive.
My daughter is very stable now and I've been divorced for several years.
Spencer's slave no longer 2 months ago
Strong men cry. Strong men show true emotions regardless of anyone who says "only weak men cry".
#3
When I was about 7, one of the kids in my class was teasing me because “you have a fat mum”. I was so upset that someone could say something hurtful about the best person in my world. I convinced myself that they must just be jealous because getting cuddles from someone skinny must be difficult because of their pointy elbows, whereas cuddles from my mum where like cuddling an amazing powdery smelling cloud. They still are.
Jane Jayne Jain Jeign Jein 2 months ago
Love this. All words describing having overweight (it's a disease, you have it like heart disease, it does not define you) have such negative connotations, except for zaftig which means pleasantly plump. OP knew her mum's zaftig was a superpower!
#4
Locked in the bathroom, naked.
"Just look at you! You're fat and ugly. Nobody will ever love you the way I do." - ex-husband
He was right, I married someone who does love me, just not the way he 'loved' me. Thank God.
#5
When I was younger, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. My siblings and I shaved our heads to support her. This kid told me that “he hopes my mom dies” and that I looked like I was in the holocaust. She has been cancer free for 13 years, but f**k that kid.
Jennifer Smith 2 months ago
Am I allowed to be a little sad my husband didn’t cut his long hair when I had to shave my head during chemo? I know he didn’t have to but I thought he would in support. I finished chemo in June and have some hair but I can’t help but be a little jealous of his long hair. 😔
#6
I had struggled with infertility for years. At my dad's funeral my step sister said "I bet you feel bad that you never gave him any grandkids."
#7
“It’s a boy or it’s abortion. I’m not raising a daughter.” I miscarried two days later.
#8
I had a theatre teacher/“director” pull me aside after a show that I totally spaced a queue/line (it honestly was a super insignificant line, and the other actor improvised very well) and she straight up told me:
“Putting you in this show was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made. You’re a disappointment”
She got fired 2 years later and went to jail for a couple of years for banging my best friend's cousin who was a 15-year-old student.
I wonder if putting me in a play with one line was the biggest mistake she’s ever made.
#9
"All I ever asked for was a son. You’re useless."
This was my dad to me. I’m the youngest kid - all girls. I was his last chance at a boy, so I failed at life the moment I was born. He never forgave me for not being the son he always wanted. That being said, I never forgave him for being an awful person, so I guess we were even ROFL. He died almost 30 years ago. Ta ta, m**********r….
Fat Harry (Oi / You) 2 months ago
Given gender is dictated by the sperm, and he provided the sperm... I'd say this one is on him.
#10
My mum once said to me "I love you, you're my daughter. But I don't like you. I would never seek you out as a friend." I was 21 and it was 40 years ago. I will never get over that, it hurt so much.
Yayheterogeneity 2 months ago
It's harsh but has some truth to it. I guess it followed something that happened between the two that didn't make the mother really happy. And I hope the daughter could distance herself from this at some point. We don't choose our relatives.
#11
“I can’t love you anymore. I don’t want to go to hell, like you.” My mom, after I came out. My dad agreed. Nothings ever been the same since.
Every day is a struggle to stay alive.
Yayheterogeneity 2 months ago
What trauma religion can cause... She sounds deathly afraid. Religion should be freeing, not caging people in traumatizing behaviours.
#12
My first kid has Down Syndrome. Some lady at work asked me when I was pregnant for number two if I would do prenatal testing this time around so I could get rid of it if it turns out like the first one. Exact words. Geez, I hated her.
#13
A teacher told me that with my poor handwriting, I should be working for a trash or waste disposal company.
I took that comment and ended up receiving consistent tutoring for my penmanship and reading comprehension, and I’m now an English/Language Arts teacher.
#14
To this day, they do not realize how hurtful what they said to me was or how it impacted my whole life. "It was just luck." When I fixed a stereo system my dad was trying to fix. It wasn't luck...but from that point on I felt so stupid. I quit school in the 6th grade and was self taught on everything so that made it worse.
I went to college and got an Associate's. Now, 15 years later, I'm returning to college at 35 to get an (unrelated) bachelor's degree. I start in September. I am not stupid and it's not just luck...
SheamusFanFrom1987 2 months ago
Luck is only 1%. The rest is what you make of the situation and how it shapes you.
#15
My fiancé of 36 hours passed away on June 21st of 2009. She suffered a pulmonary embolism from her birth control Yaz
She didn’t die well… she was scared and panicked and all I could do was help, hold hand, call 911 and start CPR. In between seizing she said “oh god please don’t let me die.” I said you aren’t dying, just be cool and I hear ambulance. She passed 1 hour and 48 minutes later
She was very kind and that wasn’t meant to be hurtful at all. That comment caused me much hurt and anguish over last 14 years.
I love you Lindsay. I know I will see you again but have more life to live first.
#16
I was in a car accident in 2014, my ex said to me “I just wish you died, it would be so much easier”.
#17
"No wonder your birth parents didn't want you" - my foster mother.
Sergy Yeltsen 2 months ago
Your foster mother needs to be reported. And a good smack upside the head with a cast iron frypan.
#18
I had someone at work tell me that having breast cancer wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world because I would get a free b**b job. This was about two weeks before I had an excisional biopsy to find out if I did have breast cancer. F**k you, Nicole!
Jennifer Smith 2 months ago
So many people said this when I found out I had breast cancer. Another stupid thing they said was “ you have the good cancer” WTF?!?
#19
My mom told me this when I was 14, and it led to my first s*icide attempt: "you are a disappointment to me, and everyone who knows you. I should've just given you up for adoption.".
#20
"You're a stupid diaper wearing cripple and the world would be better off without you." - my middle school bully.
For context I have spina bifida and suffer from total incontinence due the nerves not working right.
#21
*You're still here? That fetus died hours ago.*.
From the doctor that delivered my daughter then deliberately k*lled her because "too much paperwork involved to send her to Loma Linda. I'm a busy man. You're young. Have another baby." He had shuttled me off to a closet-size storage area with a bed. Forgot about me for 12 hours.
On 50th anniversary of her murder, my ex-daughter in law sent me a text that said *"I hope you suffer."* My son and I celebrate that "ex" prefix at every opportunity.
#22
When I was young, my mom said holidays are better without me.
#23
The night before my wedding my mother drunkly told me ‘what a horrible, selfish daughter I was. That my wedding was a f*****g circus (it was tented with cafe lights) and she can’t believe what an awful selfish person I am.” Because I had my wedding in the state I had lived in for 6 years and none of her friends/family decided to travel to it. Oh and she decided she would throw her own reception the next week (the reason no one decided to come to the actual wedding) which forced me to forgo a honeymoon and instead travel to my hometown to attend her second reception.
Followed closely for when I tried to hang myself at 11 in my closet and the rack and shelf fell instead and she told me “you are too fat to hang yourself.”.
Beak Hookage 2 months ago
With a mother like that, it's quite the mystery that she tried to off herself as a kid.
#24
"You'll never be loved or cherished because you look like me. You will never belong anywhere, no one cares about you enough to actually be there for you. You will be a burden to everyone else." - From Dad to 11 year old me after we argued about how he missed my birthday(again).
But looking back, I laugh because.... it seemed like he was projecting his own insecurities onto me.
#25
My stepmom wrote me a letter when I was in my mid 20s, had 2 kids and happily married saying I had the morals of a alley cat, I was an unfit parent and my husband should divorce me. I was literally Cinderella starting from age 5. She even locked me in a cage.
Yayheterogeneity 2 months ago
She is just someone you don't need to care about. NC and I hope your father divorced her.
#26
"I cheated on you, and the only reason I'm telling you is because I'm pregnant."
#27
'People like you are a statistic. Once you fail once you'll keep on failing': head of school when I had to repeat a year in undergrad, consequence of being naive and finding myself in a s****y abusive relationship.
I refused to shake hands with him after my final performance and told him that no, I wouldn't go to graduation because I'd have to shake his hand, when he asked if I was attending. Also quite enjoyed sending copies of my 3 following degree certificates, and signing the letter Dr ... . Prick.
cerinamroth 2 months ago
A beautiful tale of revenge. Well done on continuing your education and keeping your head high.
#28
Ι was in love with a girl in uni. We had casual s*x for some years but she wouldn't commit to me because she said she wasn't into me. After I confessed my feelings she told me she sees me as her old car. Still doing the job but not what she really needs. It's a matter of time before she throws it away but as long as it's convenient it's still around. Broke my heart in a million pieces.
#29
My “friend” to me not long after a childhood friend died (like days after):
“You’re like a black hole and spread depression everywhere you go”.
#30
Took my math book up to the teacher's desk with a question. I wasn’t grasping it. He slams my book on his desk and asked me if I was stupid or what.
Small town school about 30 years ago. If I ever run into that prick I have a few things to show and tell him.
tracy black 2 months ago
i can so relate to this my 8th grade math teacher told me and i quote " i hope to God you marry rich cause you are too stupid to do anything else" i hated that man
#32
My husband just tonight told me he doesn’t love me and Im a f*****g idiot. Its not the first time and likely wont be the last.
sarcastic cat 2 months ago (edited)
Leave him!!! Why TF are you still married to an a$$hole like this?
#33
"You don't know trauma. You're making it up." Mom mocked me, because I thought I had PTSD from childhood trauma. Turns out, I was right.
The Shark 2 months ago
Kind of like my mom reading a note from my doctor when I came home from college, asking her not to smoke in the house because I had asthma. She tossed it on the counter with a bunch of other papers and said "YOU don't have asthma." while lighting up a cigarette right next to me... Had conversations with me standing outside a screen door while she was inside smoking in the kitchen. 🤦🏼♀️ My assumption is it was denial that her primary joy in life was making me sick and she didn't want to feel like a bad mother. Cigarettes were always the priority... Even now that her own health is failing 😕. Single mom who did her best, addiction is just a very powerful force.
#34
When I was 10 my mom told me I was the reason my dad was dying of cancer… he died a few months after that. I am 31 now and suffer from death anxiety.. always thinking the ppl I love will die everyday. It's hard.
#35
My mom denying her abuse towards me even almost a decade later has f****d me up more than I thought. She's way better nowadays, but she's still a narcissist.
What do you think ?
Earonn - 2 months ago
We really need psychological tests before we allow people to have children. Yes, blabla, slippery slope yaddayadda. So some adults wouldn't get what they want, boohoo - it would prevent chidlren from enduring all this. I just want to hug all of them, and be Mom to half of the OPs, just so they can feel properly loved, as they deserve.
Papa 2 months ago
You're right that it's a slippery slope. How long would it be before the person or people making the decision on who could or could not have children made the decisions based on something other than this psychological test, like ethnicity, or physical appearance? Or if the test was rigged in the beginning to control who could or could not have children by other criteria?
Load More Replies...
Mama Clare 2 months ago
I've said this on BP before, I just don't understand parents who are mean to their kids. Whether you planned that child or not, they are your blood. I couldn't ever imagine saying anything as horrific as these things to my daughter. JHC
Earonn - 2 months ago
We really need psychological tests before we allow people to have children. Yes, blabla, slippery slope yaddayadda. So some adults wouldn't get what they want, boohoo - it would prevent chidlren from enduring all this. I just want to hug all of them, and be Mom to half of the OPs, just so they can feel properly loved, as they deserve.
Papa 2 months ago
You're right that it's a slippery slope. How long would it be before the person or people making the decision on who could or could not have children made the decisions based on something other than this psychological test, like ethnicity, or physical appearance? Or if the test was rigged in the beginning to control who could or could not have children by other criteria?
Load More Replies... Mama Clare 2 months ago
I've said this on BP before, I just don't understand parents who are mean to their kids. Whether you planned that child or not, they are your blood. I couldn't ever imagine saying anything as horrific as these things to my daughter. JHC
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