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14
New Mom Is Called Manipulative After She Cries Over Missing One Of Baby’s “Firsts”
I have fond memories of visiting Santa in the mall every year as a child. I would put on my most festive dress, and my parents would brave the holiday crowds just so my brothers and I would have an opportunity to meet the big man in person. And, of course, they would get adorable photos that we’ll all get to enjoy for the rest of our lives!
As silly as it may seem, visiting Santa is a big deal for many children and, apparently, for many parents too. One mother was devastated when she found out that she wouldn’t be able to take her son to meet Santa for the very first time. Below, you’ll find the full story that she recently posted on Reddit, as well as some of the replies readers shared.
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This mother was thrilled to take her son to meet Santa for the first time
Image credits: Sean P. Twomey (not the actual image)
So when she found out that her mother-in-law took him first, she felt utterly betrayed
Image credits: bearfotos (not the actual image)
Image credits: freepik (not the actual image)
Image credits: Weak_Mail5519
Visiting Santa is an annual tradition for many kids who celebrate Christmas
Depending on how old you are, it might be difficult to remember a time when you ever believed in Santa Claus. But if you grew up in a home that celebrated Christmas, there’s a pretty good chance you believed in the visitor from the North Pole sneaking down your chimney every Christmas Eve.
According to research by Jacqueline D. Woolley, Professor and Department of Psychology Chair at The University of Texas at Austin, a whopping 83% of five-year-olds believe that Santa Claus is real.
And Thalia Goldstein, assistant professor of applied developmental psychology at George Mason University in Fairfax, Virginia, told CNN that she believes it may be as many as 85% of young kids writing letters to Santa each December.
“Children’s belief in Santa starts when they’re between 3 and 4 years old. It’s very strong when they’re between about 4 and 8,” Goldstein shared. “Then, at 8 years old is when we start to see the drop-off in belief, when children start to understand the reality of Santa Claus.”
The Pew Research Center also reports that almost three quarters of Americans grew up in homes where they received “presents from Santa” each Christmas. And now, nearly a third of adults will pretend that Santa will be stopping by their homes too.
No matter how silly this tradition may be, if pretending that Santa is real helps parents hold onto the magic of Christmas, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that! In the same vein, many parents cherish being able to witness their children’s “firsts,” even if it’s something the child will experience many more times in their life.
Image credits: Curated Lifestyle (not the actual image)
Being there to witness their child’s “firsts” is important for many parents
In this story, the child is only a few months old and likely won’t even remember his visit to Santa or believe in Santa Claus for a few years. But for this mother, it’s more about being able to share that special moment with her son and have a photo, so she can remember it forever and tell her son about it some day.
Parents are similarly devastated if they don’t get to hear their child’s first words or witness their child’s first steps. There’s often a photo or video taken, and parents might start shedding tears of joy when they realize that their child has accomplished something for the first time.
And as the mother here pointed out, these “firsts” are also her “lasts.” Lori Ennis wrote a piece for Still Standing explaining why these firsts (and simultaneously, lasts) are so meaningful for parents of only children.
“The difference, I think, in parenting the only child I had to live is that while I revel in ALL that he does as he lives and grows, each milestone we hit makes me mourn a little bit about opportunities never to come again,” Ennis writes.
Perhaps the mother-in-law in this story has unintentionally forgotten how important it is to be by your child’s side for all of their milestones.
We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation down below, pandas. Do you think this new mom is being dramatic, or do you agree that her mother-in-law crossed the line? Feel free to weigh in. Then, you can find another Bored Panda article discussing similar themes right here!
Image credits: Daiga Ellaby (not the actual image)
Many readers sided with the mother, and she joined in on the conversation to share more details
However, some thought the mother was being a bit dramatic
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What do you think ?
Mark Childers 20 hours ago
That poor mom. It sounds like she had a devastating labor and a horrible recovery and now can't have more kids. That's got to be traumatic. No wonder she reacted that way, and it's telling her husband did as well. It's his first, too, and they had it planned. The grandmother deliberately went behind their backs, I guess to make a point. Hopefully, in a few years, they'll be able to forget after all the other firsts.
Lisa 4 hours ago
Yeah, the OOP just had a baby, and was dealing with the trauma of the childbirth. Like she can be emotional all she wants, the MIL was being a sneaky sneak and knew OOP wanted to take her child to see Santa. Very disrespectful and then trying to act like the new mom is the problem. That's the real issue, MIL is the problem.
Load More Replies... Tyke 17 hours ago (edited)
She needs to pick her battles, the baby won't remember it. However, there are definitely trust issues (rightly) with MIL, so I'd focus more on ensuring this doesn't happen as baby gets older. For context, I also only had one due to an incredibly awful labour trauma, etc. I finally took him to see Santa at an age he'd remember - he hated it and cried the entire time. So when I say "pick your battles" I mean it for her own mental health more than anything.
TribbleThinking 13 hours ago (edited)
I agree. I'd go further. Firstly grandma no longer gets any alone time. And as grandma has upped the ante by posting her "triumph" her social feed, I would add this story to her social feed, finishing with "I wonder how many other firsts grandma thinks is rightfully hers".
Load More Replies...
Powerful Katrinka 12 hours ago
The whole Santa scenario is beside the point. What is imporant is that the parents established a clear boundary, and the MIL ignored it. If the parents let this go, it will absolutely happen again.
ॐBoyGanesh 6 hours ago
Then the manipulative MIL (clearly the grandma-time trip to shopping & Santa picture was planned) gaslit her by calling her reaction “manipulative” when manipulation is precisely what the MIL did. This isn’t the first time this lady has lied & connived to do what she wants, boundaries be damned, & it certainly won’t be the last.
Load More Replies... Mark Childers 20 hours ago
That poor mom. It sounds like she had a devastating labor and a horrible recovery and now can't have more kids. That's got to be traumatic. No wonder she reacted that way, and it's telling her husband did as well. It's his first, too, and they had it planned. The grandmother deliberately went behind their backs, I guess to make a point. Hopefully, in a few years, they'll be able to forget after all the other firsts.
Lisa 4 hours ago
Yeah, the OOP just had a baby, and was dealing with the trauma of the childbirth. Like she can be emotional all she wants, the MIL was being a sneaky sneak and knew OOP wanted to take her child to see Santa. Very disrespectful and then trying to act like the new mom is the problem. That's the real issue, MIL is the problem.
Load More Replies... Tyke 17 hours ago (edited)
She needs to pick her battles, the baby won't remember it. However, there are definitely trust issues (rightly) with MIL, so I'd focus more on ensuring this doesn't happen as baby gets older. For context, I also only had one due to an incredibly awful labour trauma, etc. I finally took him to see Santa at an age he'd remember - he hated it and cried the entire time. So when I say "pick your battles" I mean it for her own mental health more than anything.
TribbleThinking 13 hours ago (edited)
I agree. I'd go further. Firstly grandma no longer gets any alone time. And as grandma has upped the ante by posting her "triumph" her social feed, I would add this story to her social feed, finishing with "I wonder how many other firsts grandma thinks is rightfully hers".
Load More Replies... Powerful Katrinka 12 hours ago
The whole Santa scenario is beside the point. What is imporant is that the parents established a clear boundary, and the MIL ignored it. If the parents let this go, it will absolutely happen again.
ॐBoyGanesh 6 hours ago
Then the manipulative MIL (clearly the grandma-time trip to shopping & Santa picture was planned) gaslit her by calling her reaction “manipulative” when manipulation is precisely what the MIL did. This isn’t the first time this lady has lied & connived to do what she wants, boundaries be damned, & it certainly won’t be the last.
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