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Sister Demands To Get Niece’s Rare Bag: “Financial Issues Due To Her Lifestyle Habits”
Love, respect, and trust all have one thing in common: they’re built on a foundation of give-and-take. If you’re the only person who’s constantly sacrificing something in your relationships, then clearly, something’s gone wrong. This is why boundaries are so powerful. And like it or not, you need them when dealing with your family, too, if you want those relationships to be healthy.
Many of us have things that we love to collect and it would hurt us to see our prized possessions given away. A mom went viral after asking internet users for their input regarding an argument she had with her sister. The sibling wanted her niece’s rare backpack as a gift for her new boyfriend’s daughter, and got told ‘no,’ which caused a lot of frustration on all sides. Read on for the full story. Meanwhile, Bored Panda reached out to the author via Reddit for an update. We’ll update the post as soon as we hear back from her.
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Certain Disney-themed backpacks are very popular among collectors and can cost a pretty penny
Image credits: corgilover607 (not the actual photo)
A mom asked the internet for advice after her a family argument got out of hand over her daughter’s rare backpack
Image credits: megostudio (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Virtual_Rule_3256
If you’re a serious collector, some of these backpacks can set you back hundreds of dollars because they’re so rare
Being a collector can be expensive. According to Inside the Magic, some Loungefly backpacks can cost hundreds of dollars. For instance, the Disney Club 33 Emerald 55th Anniversary backpack can set you back around $249 but has been known to cost as much as $800 on eBay.
Meanwhile, the Disney Sleeping Beauty ‘Make It Pink! Make It Blue!’ backpack has been bought by some people online for nearly $600 from resellers.
The Disney Club 33 Haunted Mansion backpack, on the other hand, will set you back as much as $450 on eBay. The Disney Blue Sequin Peter Pan backpack falls in a similar range, costing roughly $500 if you’re a die-hard collector. And if you’re a fan of Nightmare Before Christmas, the Zero Crossbody Bag can be bought for nearly $400 online.
Though at first glance it sounds peculiar to collect something like backpacks, the reality is that many of you probably have collections or fandoms that you deeply love. Some activities like collecting stamps or coins might be more popular, but at its core, this is no different than liking backpacks, shoes, postcards, miniatures, cars, video games, or wine bottle corks from a hundred different vintages.
The point is that you have a person who is passionate about a specific niche (or multiple niches). They want to expand their collection, talk about their hobbies with other like-minded people, and keep an eye out for rare items, new releases, and limited editions.
It can be a ton of fun to immerse yourself in one specific area, and it’s fine, so long as you keep a balance in your life. People are, after all, more than just collectors. You need to remind yourself from time to that other things are important too, from your relationships and health to your vocation and creative endeavors.
Loungefly presents itself as being accessible to both casual fans and collectors, providing them with “unique designs that tell a story and allow you to show off what you love every day through your wardrobe.”
The company sells officially licensed apparel and accessories, which makes it a good fit for many fans, including lovers of all things Disney. It also doesn’t hurt that many of their designs, well, simply look good.
Image credits: highladyofatlantia (not the actual photo)
Many people collect things, but some folks can feel envious that others have items that they can’t get
However, if you search the internet, a common complaint among some commenters is that these backpacks can get incredibly expensive if they’re no longer being officially sold. That means that people have to look for other online vendors and resellers if they want a particular model or character.
In other words, your hobby can get incredibly expensive if you start treating it as something super serious. It can bring out a lot of negative feelings among your fellow collectors, too, from envy and jealousy to greed and the fear of missing out.
Objectively speaking, it’s not like anyone has to get their hands on a particular backpack to be happy in life. There are lots of other experiences and relationships in life that you can focus on instead. Life can be good regardless of what you’ve accumulated: who you spend your time with and how matters more than what you buy and keep.
However, it would be unfair to demand that someone give away a part of their beloved collection, to which they’re attached emotionally. If someone’s forcing you to do something, it’s not charity.
Furthermore, it speaks volumes about someone’s values that they feel entitled to someone else’s property at the drop of a hat. If you’re demanding a prized possession from someone, the least you can do is orchestrate a meeting between that person and the one you want to give the backpack to. It can feel bizarre to help someone out whom you haven’t even met, at great cost to you. There needs to be some sort of burgeoning personal relationship there.
What’s your take on the entire situation, Pandas? Do you think the mom was right to enforce some boundaries with her sister or should she have relented? How do you maintain healthy boundaries with your family and friends? What things do you collect? Do you have any Disney-themed backpacks? We’d love to hear your thoughts. Oh, and if you’d like to, feel free to share photos of your collections in the comments, too.
Image credits: ConsistentRespond270 (not the actual photo)
The mom’s story quickly went viral, and she answered some people’s questions in the comments
Many readers were very supportive of the woman. Here’s their take on the family drama
However, not everyone was on the same page. Some folks were much more critical of the mom
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What do you think ?
TribbleThinking 3 weeks ago
This is a total win-win-win. Your daughter keeps her personal property, freaky presumptuous unknown teenager is kept out of her social media, and your sister's promised never to ask you for help again. Woohoo!
KatSaidWhat 3 weeks ago
YTAs providing the usual "oh do f**k off, lol"... If anyone is acting entitled, it's the sister and the niece. You don't decide which of someone else's property you want and then get s****y when given a no. Also, clearly YTA did not read the part where the daughter doesn't actually have her own access to the tiktok.
CanadianDimes 3 weeks ago
Especially the one telling her to quit teaching her child to be materialistic and selfish - but it's okay to teach someone else's child to be exactly that??
Load More Replies...
Traveling Lady Railfan 3 weeks ago (edited)
Possibly an unpopular take, but it's my opinion that you shouldn't post photos of your rare / desirable / expensive collections on social media. It's fun to show off what you've got especially if you're excited about it, I know I'm a collector too. But you're so much better off not doing it. The chances that you're opening yourself up to theft are minimal depending on your social media / IRL people crossover but yeah. Aunt and aunt's boyfriend saw nieces collection( on tiktok/IG/whatever), they probably wouldn't have been snooping around the kids bedroom, you put it out there to be seen, it gets seen. There is a responsibility involved with safeguarding yourself. Putting too much "out there" can be dangerous. (Of course in this case I think the aunt/boyfriend are in the wrong)
Kira Okah 3 weeks ago
I don't post my collection online for such reasons. Film memorabilia collection, got some very rare LE pieces that sell for over a grand by this point that could be a bit of a risk if I publicised it to the world. Safeguard yourself and your family.
Load More Replies...
Bat cat in a hat 3 weeks ago
Hey I want a Zero bag as well, give it to meeeeeee! Sister is so entitled, the kid is not even hers, all she wants is to score brownie points with the boyfriend! Zoey is 15 ffs, old enough to understand you don't get everything you want, it's a great life lesson as well, she could start saving to buy her own at some point so she'll be better at managing money than the adults!
Skogsrået 3 weeks ago
So the sister mishandled her own economy and is now demanding others to cover up for her fûckups and if they don't they are selfish?
Tabitha 3 weeks ago (edited)
I suspect “lifestyle choices” in connection to finances is code for one of the expensive addictions, like d***s or gambling, and desperate addicts will exploit and prey on their own families, draining them dry to get money for a fix. Sister and her boyfriend saw $$$ when they looked the bag up on eBay and decided on a (hairbrained and obvious to anyone whose brain isn’t addled by addiction) scheme to get it and sell it. I bet the niece knows nothing about this, and would never see the bag if Sister ever got her hands on it. BTW, the dog from Nightmare Before Christmas is named Zero, and is incredibly cute, so that backpack must be adorable.
Load More Replies... Dana Gordon 3 weeks ago
I'm sorry about all the folks who don't understand 'collecting'- my daughter collected certain Porcelein dolls & when you get them from everyone for birthdays, Christmas, etc. it doesn't take long to add up. The definition of entitled: "YOU HAVE IT, I WANT IT- I DIDN'T EARN IT, NOT FAIR, GIVE IT TO ME!" Absolutely not! P.S. my mom gave a ring to my cousin for his fiance when he got married that grandmother gave to her for me. They split up up, no ring for me, I never really forgave her for it.
Broadredpanda 3 weeks ago
You YTAs just f**k off you sad horrible small minded MFs Who has 50 backpacks? Someone who collects them AH! How is she a selfish brat? You are a f*****g adult so go ef yourself! Her mother looks over everything her daughter does! But you idiots can't read! Stop trolling you sad pathetic little humans! It's a child's collection. No different than you child collecting Barbie's or model cars! It's just unusual and remember that it's the sister and maybe her 15 year old daughter that are entitled MFs honestly it's only these sort of comments that make me swear and I don't know why but I get really pissed. I just hate the amount of jealousy going on and name calling a 13 year old that hasn't even written one single word on here. Trolls, molls and automobiles! Sorry:( just really mad
GrowingThruConcrete 3 weeks ago
The materialism and social media affirmations here are like two big gators, swimming round in a circle, eating each other at the tail
Leg less In Minneapolis 3 weeks ago
Ah… the joy of Choosy Beggar relatives! Oh look someone has waves the No Contact, let the ignoring begin!!!!
KirklandMelissa Anderson 3 weeks ago
Bet the sister and her new bf would sell the bag to support their d**g habits.
Bookworm 3 weeks ago
The YTAs aren't even about the actual issue this time. 'Should children be allowed to post on TikTok' and 'Is it bad to buy your kids expensive collectibles' are entirely different problems, and have nothing to do with the actual question, which is something like 'Am I actually being selfish and entitled for not stealing my daughter's stuff to give to a random kid who wants it?' The fact that OP is even thinking that suggests there's maybe some consumerism-related guilt there she may want to pay attention to in the future, but the last thing she wants to teach her daughter in this situation is that random fans are entitled to get whatever they want from her.
Binky Melnik 3 weeks ago
The people who voted she shoulda given bitchsister the backpack or found a compromise are obviously sister and her flying monkeys. Or idiots, though I spose that’s redundant with “sister and her flying monkeys.”
Gozer LeGozerian 3 weeks ago
NTA. But please keep kids off social media for as long as possible.
TribbleThinking 3 weeks ago
This is a total win-win-win. Your daughter keeps her personal property, freaky presumptuous unknown teenager is kept out of her social media, and your sister's promised never to ask you for help again. Woohoo!
KatSaidWhat 3 weeks ago
YTAs providing the usual "oh do f**k off, lol"... If anyone is acting entitled, it's the sister and the niece. You don't decide which of someone else's property you want and then get s****y when given a no. Also, clearly YTA did not read the part where the daughter doesn't actually have her own access to the tiktok.
CanadianDimes 3 weeks ago
Especially the one telling her to quit teaching her child to be materialistic and selfish - but it's okay to teach someone else's child to be exactly that??
Load More Replies... Traveling Lady Railfan 3 weeks ago (edited)
Possibly an unpopular take, but it's my opinion that you shouldn't post photos of your rare / desirable / expensive collections on social media. It's fun to show off what you've got especially if you're excited about it, I know I'm a collector too. But you're so much better off not doing it. The chances that you're opening yourself up to theft are minimal depending on your social media / IRL people crossover but yeah. Aunt and aunt's boyfriend saw nieces collection( on tiktok/IG/whatever), they probably wouldn't have been snooping around the kids bedroom, you put it out there to be seen, it gets seen. There is a responsibility involved with safeguarding yourself. Putting too much "out there" can be dangerous. (Of course in this case I think the aunt/boyfriend are in the wrong)
Kira Okah 3 weeks ago
I don't post my collection online for such reasons. Film memorabilia collection, got some very rare LE pieces that sell for over a grand by this point that could be a bit of a risk if I publicised it to the world. Safeguard yourself and your family.
Load More Replies... Bat cat in a hat 3 weeks ago
Hey I want a Zero bag as well, give it to meeeeeee! Sister is so entitled, the kid is not even hers, all she wants is to score brownie points with the boyfriend! Zoey is 15 ffs, old enough to understand you don't get everything you want, it's a great life lesson as well, she could start saving to buy her own at some point so she'll be better at managing money than the adults!
Skogsrået 3 weeks ago
So the sister mishandled her own economy and is now demanding others to cover up for her fûckups and if they don't they are selfish?
Tabitha 3 weeks ago (edited)
I suspect “lifestyle choices” in connection to finances is code for one of the expensive addictions, like d***s or gambling, and desperate addicts will exploit and prey on their own families, draining them dry to get money for a fix. Sister and her boyfriend saw $$$ when they looked the bag up on eBay and decided on a (hairbrained and obvious to anyone whose brain isn’t addled by addiction) scheme to get it and sell it. I bet the niece knows nothing about this, and would never see the bag if Sister ever got her hands on it. BTW, the dog from Nightmare Before Christmas is named Zero, and is incredibly cute, so that backpack must be adorable.
Load More Replies... Dana Gordon 3 weeks ago
I'm sorry about all the folks who don't understand 'collecting'- my daughter collected certain Porcelein dolls & when you get them from everyone for birthdays, Christmas, etc. it doesn't take long to add up. The definition of entitled: "YOU HAVE IT, I WANT IT- I DIDN'T EARN IT, NOT FAIR, GIVE IT TO ME!" Absolutely not! P.S. my mom gave a ring to my cousin for his fiance when he got married that grandmother gave to her for me. They split up up, no ring for me, I never really forgave her for it.
Broadredpanda 3 weeks ago
You YTAs just f**k off you sad horrible small minded MFs Who has 50 backpacks? Someone who collects them AH! How is she a selfish brat? You are a f*****g adult so go ef yourself! Her mother looks over everything her daughter does! But you idiots can't read! Stop trolling you sad pathetic little humans! It's a child's collection. No different than you child collecting Barbie's or model cars! It's just unusual and remember that it's the sister and maybe her 15 year old daughter that are entitled MFs honestly it's only these sort of comments that make me swear and I don't know why but I get really pissed. I just hate the amount of jealousy going on and name calling a 13 year old that hasn't even written one single word on here. Trolls, molls and automobiles! Sorry:( just really mad
GrowingThruConcrete 3 weeks ago
The materialism and social media affirmations here are like two big gators, swimming round in a circle, eating each other at the tail
Leg less In Minneapolis 3 weeks ago
Ah… the joy of Choosy Beggar relatives! Oh look someone has waves the No Contact, let the ignoring begin!!!!
KirklandMelissa Anderson 3 weeks ago
Bet the sister and her new bf would sell the bag to support their d**g habits.
Bookworm 3 weeks ago
The YTAs aren't even about the actual issue this time. 'Should children be allowed to post on TikTok' and 'Is it bad to buy your kids expensive collectibles' are entirely different problems, and have nothing to do with the actual question, which is something like 'Am I actually being selfish and entitled for not stealing my daughter's stuff to give to a random kid who wants it?' The fact that OP is even thinking that suggests there's maybe some consumerism-related guilt there she may want to pay attention to in the future, but the last thing she wants to teach her daughter in this situation is that random fans are entitled to get whatever they want from her.
Binky Melnik 3 weeks ago
The people who voted she shoulda given bitchsister the backpack or found a compromise are obviously sister and her flying monkeys. Or idiots, though I spose that’s redundant with “sister and her flying monkeys.”
Gozer LeGozerian 3 weeks ago
NTA. But please keep kids off social media for as long as possible.
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