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Eldest Son Says He Will Move Out Unless He Gets A Separate Room, Is Told To Pay Rent
Interview With Expert
As a kid, you take plenty of things for granted that you’ll miss as an adult. Summer vacations, a fridge magically filled itself with free food and not having to worry about scheduling my own doctor’s appointments were some of my personal favorites. And of course, having housing without paying rent!
But one teen actually offered to start paying his mother every month just so he could have his own bedroom. Below, you’ll find the full story that the mom recently shared on Reddit, as well as a conversation with parenting expert and founder of Pregnant Chicken, Amy Morrison!
RELATED:
This mom’s oldest child offered to start paying rent so he could have his own space
Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)
But now, the mother is wondering if she made a mistake by agreeing to charge him rent
Image credits: bearfotos / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Maleficent_Trick_489
“It feels like a fair solution between the mom and her older son”
Image credits: Elina Fairytale / Pexels (not the actual photo)
To gain more insight into this topic, we reached out to parenting expert and founder of Pregnant Chicken, Amy Morrison. Amy was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and share her thoughts on parents charging their children rent.
“Unique problems often call for unique solutions,” the expert says. “Charging rent probably isn’t a great idea for kids who are in school full time or don’t have the means to pay it. But in this situation, it feels like a fair solution between the mom and her older son.”
We were curious if Amy believes parents should have a say in how their teens spend their own money. “Parents are more than welcome to offer guidance on how to save or spend money, but if a teen made that money on their own, they should be able to decide how to spend it on their own,” she shared.
Amy also noted that money isn’t the only way teens can “pay” their parents. “If parents and teens work out tasks or duties that go above and beyond chores, I think it’s a fair exchange instead of money,” the expert says.
But in this situation, Amy says the issue has less to do with the rent and more to do with making decisions that affect her other children without talking to them about it. “This is a tricky situation for this mom, but I think she did a great job working with her teen to figure out a fair deal.”
“The next step is to sit down with all of your kids and figure out a solution that works for everyone with the space that you have”
Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)
“However, it got tricky when the compromise affected the 14-year-old, and it doesn’t sound like he was consulted on the solution,” the parenting expert continued. “Sure, he’s still sharing a room with ‘a’ brother. But your 16-year-old brother is rarely interchangeable with your 10-year-old brother.”
“I think the next step is to sit down with all of your kids and figure out a solution that works for everyone with the space that you have,” Amy noted.
Charging children rent is a divisive topic, even when the “kids” are adults. But in recent years, it’s become quite common, as about a third of Americans between the ages of 18 and 34 currently live with their parents. Rent prices have skyrocketed, and it might be worth it to stay with Mom and Dad if they’ll charge a fraction of what a landlord would.
According to a study from Compare the Market, 55% of British parents charge their adult children about $34 a week to stay in their homes. And the most common reasons cited for charging their children are the cost of groceries, energy bills and gas bills.
But some argue that charging children rent, especially teens or young adults, prevents them from being able to save up enough money to move out. It also might make them feel less welcome in their parents’ home, as their relationship can shift from parent-child to landlord-tenant.
We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Do you think this mother was wrong for coming to this agreement with her oldest son? Feel free to weigh in, and then if you’d like to check out another Bored Panda article discussing similar issues, look no further than right here!
Many readers assured the mother that she had not done anything wrong
However, some thought that the arrangement was unfair to her other children
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What do you think ?
Shark Lady 2 months ago
I agree with the comments about the daughter, she should not have to share with a brother. I believe the recommendations are that after age 8 only same sex children should share a room. It's a tough situation for all of them but it's really on the mum to try and make things right. She needs to see if there is any help out there for her to be able to get a more suitable living space for them all.
Midoribird Aoi 2 months ago
When my family fell into bad financial straits, I had to for a few years. Neither my little brother or myself are warped. I changed in the bathroom. By the time he hit puberty, we each had separate rooms once again.
Load More Replies... Becca not Becky 2 months ago
I see a few possible options to consider. How about an arrangement where the oldest child living at home gets their own room if they pay for it? As for taking money from the 16yo, I think that's fair since he requested an upgrade, but at the same time, maybe mom could set it (all or some) aside without him knowing and then give it to him when he graduates? Or another option, 14M could have the couch while mom and daughter share a room and the two youngest boys share.
Guess Undheit 2 months ago
Usually I disagree with the YTA comments, but they're right this time. Several of them.
Shark Lady 2 months ago
I agree with the comments about the daughter, she should not have to share with a brother. I believe the recommendations are that after age 8 only same sex children should share a room. It's a tough situation for all of them but it's really on the mum to try and make things right. She needs to see if there is any help out there for her to be able to get a more suitable living space for them all.
Midoribird Aoi 2 months ago
When my family fell into bad financial straits, I had to for a few years. Neither my little brother or myself are warped. I changed in the bathroom. By the time he hit puberty, we each had separate rooms once again.
Load More Replies... Becca not Becky 2 months ago
I see a few possible options to consider. How about an arrangement where the oldest child living at home gets their own room if they pay for it? As for taking money from the 16yo, I think that's fair since he requested an upgrade, but at the same time, maybe mom could set it (all or some) aside without him knowing and then give it to him when he graduates? Or another option, 14M could have the couch while mom and daughter share a room and the two youngest boys share.
Guess Undheit 2 months ago
Usually I disagree with the YTA comments, but they're right this time. Several of them.
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